The Night Everything Changed!
by SkaterSince2004
Summary: TEENAGE JAX & TARA LOVE STORY! How did they fall in love? My version of a prequel to the TV show and my other story 'You and me and our boys! Rated M/R for strong language/adult themes/smut. Please review.
1. Nothing touches her

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

Quote that inspired this story:

" _My shit was crazy, Tara. That 'I gotta be with you every minute or I'm gonna kill myself' type of crazy … Look, … the way I feel about you hasn't changed!"_

\- Jax Teller to Tara Knowles (S1E12)

X

This is not a story about love at first sight, because that would be weird considering the first time they've laid eyes on each other they were both still in diapers, although neither one of them could possibly even remember that.

This is not a story about love at first touch either, since they've played together on the playground during their younger years too, with not a spark in sight between them at the time.

As a matter of fact, they've seen and touched each other countless times over the years since they were little, in blissful unawareness about how much they'd mean to one another one day in the not so distant future.

They've bumped into each other in the hallway and shared classes and teachers since Kindergarten, all through junior high and now high school. Brushed against each other waiting in line getting on or off a ride at Fun Town year after year, or met several times in passing while fighting their way through the crowd at some random house party just in the last year alone, just to name a few.

So yeah, this wasn't that kind of love story at all, with these two it was definitely a bit more complicated than that, before they both finally realized and accepted the fact that they were in love. But eventually, they did just that, and this is the kind of story that tells you how that came to be. _How they came to be the madly in love Jax and Tara_ , - but also what became of them from there on out!

X

Piney was the first of them to notice the flashing lights of the Charming police cars way off in the distance, both teenage boys were too distracted by their own conversation about the latest horror movie available at the local rental place downtown.

On a whim he decides to make that left turn and heads down that road to further investigate, instead of heading straight home. His old pickup truck slowly approaches the scene near the end of the street, and a sickening feeling begins to fester in the pit of his stomach when he recognizes the house where some crime had apparently taken place tonight.

"What do you think that's about?" Jax asks, giving the much older man beside him a quick glance, but before Piney can answer, Opie quickly chimes in, alarmed. "Oh shit, dad, that's the Knowles place."

"Knowles?" Jax wonders suddenly out loud. "As in Tara Knowles?" _His secret crush? Fuck!_

"I know," Piney grumbles in answer to them both and quickly puts the truck in park, his eyes glancing over in the boys' direction for the first time since he'd spotted the flashing lights. "You two stay put, you hear me." There was an old familiar warning tone to his voice that both teenagers knew better than to argue at any given moment, so they just nod their heads instead.

Piney walks as fast as his big frame allows him to when he approaches the Chief of Police, Wayne Unser. "Chief." He says, nodding his head in greeting.

"Piney." Wayne greets him in return.

"What the hell happened?" Piney doesn't waste another minute on small talk and gets straight to the point.

Wayne eyes him wearily for a moment, but at the end falters as was expected. "Break-in, Old-Man-Knowles is out of town, business trip, his daughter was home alone, perp attacked her, but she was able to fight him off."

"Is she alright?" Piney pipes up in concern.

"Yeah." Wayne nods, but then elaborates. "I mean, she's shook up, of course, but she was lucky, no real damage done, if you know what I mean?" He gives Piney a pointed look and they both nod their heads in agreement, before Wayne adds. "I appreciate you stopping by, but we've got this under control, so ..."

"What about the girl?" Piney interrupts him. "Tara, is it?"

"What about her?" Wayne replies rather dumbfounded, even though he has a pretty good idea what Piney is getting at.

"Her old man's out of town, where's she gonna stay?" Piney asks with the most innocent expression he can muster.

But Wayne can see right through him, and actually steps closer to ensure nobody would overhear what he's about to say next. "Charming PD's got this under control, Piney. I don't need the club involved in this one, getting all up and arms and whatnot. Every once in a while I could use a win, you know, to keep this badge that keeps this ... this relationship going. Besides, we don't even know if it's the same guy."

Piney has to bite his tongue, which is a hard thing to do for him under any circumstance, but he knows that if he said out loud what he really wants to say, it would get him nowhere tonight. In this instance, diplomacy is needed. "Listen, Knowles and I go way back, and his kid is friends with my kid. She's been over at my place a million times. I think the girl might be more comfortable around some familiar faces until her old man gets back, instead of camping out at the Police station, don't you think?"

Wayne shakes his head, huffing in exasperation. "Little Missy's really shook up, she's still giving her statement to one of my female deputies right now. And I mean no disrespect to your kid and you, but I think under the current circumstances it ain't too farfetched to assume the girl would be more comfortable around other females, if you know what I'm getting at? And last I've heard, Mary and you are on the outs again."

"You said she fought him off?" Piney re-inquires, wondering if maybe he misunderstood earlier.

"She did," Wayne reassures him once more, but quickly adds. "Doesn't mean she ain't scared. She's just a fifteen-year-old girl for Christ's sake." He lets out a staggered breath and shakes his head once more, before he finally dares to look back up and meet Piney's eyes. "Looks like a goddamn twister touched down in that living room in there, little thing that she is, she put up one hell of a fight, I tell you that."

"Good for her," Piney adds, feeling a small sparkle of pride for a girl he hardly knows.

"Yeah." Wayne nods, and clears his throat as his mind goes back to the other female victims that haven't been this lucky in the recent home-invasions that have been plaguing Charming over the last couple of weeks. "Good for her." He adds too.

Both men quiet down for a moment, their eyes glued to the house while either one of them contemplates their next move, until Piney gives it one last try. "How about you ask her?"

Wayne looks over at Piney, a puzzled look that is quickly answered when Piney elaborates. "Let her choose where she'd be more comfortable until her father gets back. With Opie and myself? Or with you and your gaggle of deputies down at the station? Let her make up her own mind."

X

Opie pulls two big towels from the dryer, the thickest and fluffiest looking ones he can find, yet neither one of them is very soft since his father usually doesn't see the need to invest in such trivial things as fabric softener.

He takes a second to inspect them for stains that might've not come out in the wash, before he's gripping them both in one hand, and slams the dryer door shut with a loud clang on his way out of the laundry room.

He hurries down the hall towards the bathroom, his footsteps heavy and loud with every step he takes on the worn-down hardwood floor, until he comes to a sudden stop and lets his knuckles rap across the wooden surface in front of him.

The door creaks when Tara opens it, still fully dressed, looking a complete mess, a little peaked, maybe nauseous even, but the water in the shower is already running in the background, when she has to look up to meet his eyes the way he's towering over her.

"Here," Opie says unceremoniously as he holds out the two towels for her, his face as much a blank slate as he can muster at the moment, because the last thing she needs right now is pity. "They're clean." He adds in case she's wondering.

"Thanks, Opie." Tara answers in a rather uncharacteristic small voice, a faint smile tugging on the corner of her busted up lip, and she winces at the pain for just a second before she recovers and musters up a stoic expression again instead.

She's usually not this shy around him, the opposite really, and he can't help but wonder just what exactly she's been through earlier tonight to make her seem almost like a totally different person to him now.

"You're welcome." He answers, and tries to muster a smile, not sure if it looks genuine, before Tara closes the bathroom door in his face and clicks the lock in place too.

He turns and is just about to step away, when the lock clicks and the door opens once more with another creak. He looks back just in time to see her step into the doorframe, a questioning look on her face now. "You guys don't ... do you have any conditioner, you know, like hair conditioner?"

"Shit," Opie replies, scratching the back of his head as if in thought for a second, even though he knows that isn't the sort of stuff his father spends money on either. "I don't think we do. Sorry."

"That's okay." Tara nods her head, and before he can say anything else, she's closed and locked the door already behind her again.

Opie steps into his room, where he finds Jax stretched out and leaned back in the oversized bean bag, tossing a baseball in the air overhead and catching it again repeatedly. He's clearly lost in his own thoughts about what has happened.

An eerie silence stretches out amongst the two friends, all the banter in the truck earlier, before Tara had joined them, has vanished, while Opie's looking through the mess in his closet, trying to find the other set of bedding that he rarely, if ever, uses.

Once he finds it, he walks over to the bed, clean sheets, pillowcase and blanket in hand, tossing them carelessly on top of the magazines that sit in a pile next to his bed, before he starts stripping his old sheets and pillows off of the bed now.

"What do you think they're gonna do?" Jax finally asks out loud what both of them have been thinking, the underlying worry evident in his voice when he speaks.

Opie twists around to look back at his best friend, who's no longer tossing the ball about but is absentmindedly tracing the red stitching with his thumb instead, turning the white globe over and over again in his hand.

"What do you think?" Opie replies, eyebrows raised and the look he's giving Jax makes it clear it's a rhetorical question, no need to answer or further elaborate. The club will handle it.

"Yeah." Jax just nods, because that pretty much says it all. "I can't fucking wait to patch in." He mumbles under his breath moments later, before he begins to toss the ball up in the air again, a vain attempt to distract himself from what happened tonight to a girl he's had his eyes on for some time now. And then he's wondering to himself, If only he had made a move on her sooner, then maybe she wouldn't have been home alone tonight.

But his thoughts are sidetracked again, when they hear the front door to the house open, followed by the commotion in the living room that makes it clear that the other members of the club have arrived.

Jax gets up out of the bean bag chair, scrambling to his feet, and Opie abandons his mission to put new linens on his bed like his father has instructed him to, and they both head towards the living room instead, getting their usual greeting of slaps on the back and the mockingly inappropriate banter reserved only for them dished out by their so-called _'uncles',_ to which they hold no actual blood relations at all.

Shortly after, Opie's sent off to let Tara know that his father's friends have arrived, and she assures him that she's almost ready, while steam's pouring out of the bathroom door when she opens it just enough to speak face to face with the much taller teenager.

She shuts the door once more, and digs through the overnight bag she'd packed that is sitting atop the closed toilet seat lid, in search of her hairbrush. It's not easy to brush through the wet hair without having used some conditioner, and she makes a mental note that should she ever make another overnight trip someplace, she'd ensure to bring her own.

Tara looks down on herself, in the most literal sense, when she takes in the clothes she's put on, and she's frustrated with her own choice that she's made, when the female deputy had helped her pack a bag in a haste to get out of the house, picking clothes straight out of the clean laundry basket that sat on a chair in the kitchen.

So now in her unflattering grey sweats, and the black oversized t-shirt, featuring none other than Johnny Cash, that actually belongs to her dad, she's feeling like she looks every bit the part, like the proverbial poster child of a battered woman, and she can't help but hate it.

But on the other hand, slipping the clothes she'd been wearing while she was being attacked back on, feels out of the question too. The shirt's torn and stretched, and she couldn't wait to get them off of her, because there is just something about those clothes that make her feel downright dirty, to the point that she suddenly bends over and picks them off of the floor to shove them angrily in the way too small trash can that sits beside the toilet instead.

She never wants to see those goddamn clothes again. Wishes she could light a match to them right now!

She glances back in the mirror one last time, licking her tongue over the cut on her lip, wiping at her blotchy face, and her red-rimmed eyes, wishing it wasn't so goddamn obvious that she'd been crying in here, but there's just no denying it, not the way she looks right now.

She pushes her still wet, long brown hair out of her face, takes in a deep breath, and for the millionth time tonight she wishes her dad was home, because he'd know just what to do in a situation like this to make her feel safe again, and then wills herself to believe that she made the right choice coming here tonight instead of going down to the police station.

She couldn't really say that she knew a whole lot about the Sons of Anarchy, or Samcro, how some people called them. She just knew the usual rumors and speculations that always circled around such a small town like Charming, some of them were good, some not.

But there had never been anything substantial that she had witnessed with her own two eyes that would give her a reason to feel scared of them, if anything the opposite was the case. What she did know was that Piney Winston was a part of it all, and that he was friends with her father, and he'd always seemed like a nice enough guy, a bit of a drunk, just like her dad, but nice nonetheless.

Opie, his only son, was really nice too, and even though it wasn't like they were close or anything, but she could honestly say that she felt like she knew him well enough by now. She'd spend countless hours sitting on the couch with him, watching music videos on MTV, or playing video games, while Piney and her dad hung out, laughing, drinking and reminiscing about times in the war. So in a weird way that made her trust Opie the most out of everyone else in this place.

And then there was Jax Teller, Opie's best friend through thick and thin for as long as Tara can remember, and even now they were practically joined at the hip. He was the son of the founder of the Sons, and the step-son to Clay Morrow, who was the current boss or president of the club, and despite all of that, he always seemed like any other teenage boy to her.

Just like Opie, he was nice to look at, handsome even and girls were usually swooning around him, but he was also known to have a bit of a temper, she's heard and even seen him get into fights every once in a while. To her though, he's always been friendly and down to earth, or at least so he'd seemed as far as she could tell. But then again, unlike Opie, she really didn't feel like she knew him much at all.

X

Tara appears timid at first when she's greeted by a rambunctious lot of men in the Winston living room, but the tone and demeanor changes instantly when the gruff-looking older men try to make her feel more at ease and feel more comfortable to speak her mind in front of them.

First impressions can be deceiving, Tara thinks to herself as her eyes drift from one tattooed biker to the next, when they usher her to a comfortable spot on the sofa and fawn over her like she holds the key, or rather the last missing piece to a puzzle they've been trying to solve for weeks.

She's a smart girl, and it doesn't take long for her to understand their intentions, when they press her on the details of the break-in to her home, and every minute piece of information she can manage to conjure back up in her head to describe what the intruder looks like. And their eagerness to get to the bottom of it all, soothes her in a way she hasn't expected. It actually makes her feel a little bit safer knowing these rough and gruff looking mountains of men are on her side and are trying to help her during a horrific evening, while her dad is a plane and car ride away.

Tara's got a feeling that from here on out she'll never look at them the same, when she'll see the fleet of motorcycles rush past her down the streets of Charming.

X

Meanwhile, the boys have been sent back to their room, and Opie goes back to the task of fixing up his bed for Tara, while Jax leans against the dresser, refusing to help, even though he's feeling antsy at the moment. He's on edge, tapping his foot to an imaginary beat in his head to Opie's obvious annoyance, while he's looking through one of his friend's magazines he's pulled from the pile near the bed.

The scene that is currently taking place out in Piney's living room is nothing too unusual. The Sons coming to the aid of someone in this town is a common occurrence to the boys, but so is being shushed away, told to keep quiet and sent to their room like they were still little children, just when things were starting to get interesting.

Both of them hate this so much. After all, they weren't little kids anymore, and if it weren't for their still slightly youthful facial features they could easily be mistaken for grown men, because at six feet four, Opie was already standing as tall as his father, and Jax, at six feet has also outgrown the majority of his fellow sophomores before the last school year had ended just a few days ago.

But not only that, thanks to a strict weight lifting and workout regimen that both have followed since eighth grade, at the tender age of sixteen they both not only stood just as tall, but were almost as strong and brawny as most of the men currently residing in that living room just down the hall from them too.

Jax wishes he could turn his brain off, make his mind stop wondering and worrying about everything, about Tara Knowles. He wishes he would've known what to say to her earlier, but he'd been too shell-shocked himself, not just at the news of what had happened, but at how she looked when Piney had brought her with him to the truck. She looked nothing like the girl he'd been secretly pining after for a while now, and it broke his heart as much as it rendered him speechless.

In yet another attempt to distract himself, he turns the magazine he's holding sideways, folding the top part open, but letting the bottom part of the center poster fall and unfold on its own, before he looks it over from top to bottom with an appreciating smirk. "Where are you gonna hide all these, huh? I can take 'em off your hands, you know." He actually cracks a real smile for the first time since they've pulled up to the Knowles home earlier, and turns the magazine he's looking through towards his friend, for Opie to see.

"Would you cut that shit out." Opie lets out a frustrated grunt, feeling just as sickened by what has happened to Tara. He snatches the playboy out of Jax's hand and tosses it under the bed, before he begins to kick the whole pile until they've all disappeared out of sight. Letting his agitation out on the stack of magazines instead of his best but obnoxious friend, and the fucked up situation that's out of his control.

He starts to gather some of his dirty clothes off of the ground, and along with the dirty sheets and blanket, he begins to shove them all into the closet in an attempt to hide them out of sight as well.

The door opens without so much as a warning knock and Piney steps in, taking in the remaining mess around the room, which isn't all that bad considering how it looked just moments ago, yet the older man still curses under his breath. "Jesus, would you boys clean this shit up?"

The boys share an annoyed glance that Piney seems to miss completely, but they remain quiet, and the older man quickly reaches in his pocket, pulls out a handful of bills and hands them to his son, before he adds gruffly. "Here, order a pizza or something, I don't think she's eaten yet."

"Sure thing, pop," Opie replies, counting the money his dad has just handed him, but he can't bite his tongue, even though he already knows he won't be told much in return. "Where are you going?"

"Got some club business to handle, son," Piney replies per usual, but for a moment there's a flash of something in his eyes that neither Jax or Opie seems to recognize, before the man glances cautiously over his shoulder as he steps further into the room and quietly closes the bedroom door behind him.

Piney runs a hand over his chin, as if deep in thought for a moment, before he finally meets their eyes. His focus goes back and forth between the two teenage boys standing before him as he speaks. "Listen up, Clay and Gemma took Tig and the prospects with them up to Rogue River, so we're already shorthanded, which means I'm counting on the two of you to help keep an eye on the girl. Don't let her out of your sight, you understand?" There is a seriousness to the tone of his voice that can't be missed and the atmosphere in the room practically changes along with his words.

Jax and Opie glance at each other, both with a mixture of intrigue, but also puzzlement in their eyes, and Opie's the first to shrug his shoulders. "Sure, okay, pop." He's feeling a sense of excitement rush through him, yet not really understanding why they're being brought into the loop all of a sudden. "But ..." He glances back at Jax wondering if he's getting that same eerie feeling too, before he meets his fathers' eyes again. "I mean, what's going on?"

Piney clears his throat, and holds up four fingers at the same moment he begins to speak. "Four women have been attacked in home-invasions over the past month, not a single one of them made it. Left for dead in their own homes. Tara would've been number five. She's seen the guy, can identify him ... so like I said, don't let her out of your sight, keep her safe. Do you think you two knuckleheads can manage that?"

"Of course, Piney." Jax chimes in for the first time, pushing away from the dresser and rising to full height, like a soldier called to action. His tongue-tied reaction earlier might've not been one of his finer moments, but he's more than ready to make up for it now. He can protect Tara, he knows he can. "Nothing touches her." He says, it's a line he's heard Tig utter a thousand times to Clay in reference to keeping his mother safe, and deep down he's reveling in the feeling of using the words himself for the first time.

"Don't worry, we've got this, dad," Opie adds, and at that Piney gives them both an approving nod.

X

The Sons have disappeared just as quickly as they'd appeared, leaving her back to her own scary thoughts in someone else's house.

So Tara sits rather awkwardly on Piney's comfy old recliner, her bare feet pulled up on the chair under her, a cup of tea in her hand that's no longer hot, barely even warm at this point, but it keeps her hands busy, keeps herself from fidgeting too much, so she continues to hold the cup even though she has no intentions of drinking it.

She's so lost in her own thoughts that she doesn't even notice Jax stepping into the doorframe, leaning against it and watching her, until he suddenly speaks up. "You doing okay, darlin'?"

She looks up at him now, meeting his eyes and the innocent smile he's giving her, and despite the gravity of her current situation, she can't help but smirk at him a little when she recalls his words just now. "Did you seriously just call me 'darling'?"

That is not at all how Jax has expected her to react, so it catches him off guard and he lets a chuckle escape against his better judgment. "Yeah, I did ... sorry, force of habit, I guess." He swipes a hand down his face, when he steps further into the room now, eyeing her wearily across the room.

He takes a seat on the armrest of the sofa, and his face is more serious again as he really gets a chance to look at her now in the light. It had been dark when Piney had kicked him and Ope out of the truck and had ordered them to sit back in the truck-bed instead, so she could climb into his seat in the truck without being gawked at, and not be bothered by the two of them.

Then she'd disappeared straight into the bathroom when they'd gotten here, but now here she was, and he'd be lying if he said it didn't piss him off seeing her in this fragile-looking state, because even though he barely even knew her, he knows enough about her to know that this isn't who she is at all.

Tara Knowles is outspoken, she's confident, she's popular. Last school year she was a Charming high cheerleader for crying out loud. He can still vividly picture her walking down the hall in her cheerleading outfit, laughing, and talking to her friends without a care in the world. She had undoubtedly caught his eye a time or two in that cheerleading get-up.

"You okay though?" He asks again, but is not surprised when she simply nods her head, even though the look in her eyes tells a whole different story.

She's not okay, far from it, that much is clear, but if she's not up for sharing he won't pry, and who can blame her, it's not like they're friends or anything. He knows her, knows who she is, and vice versa. And yeah, he's always thought she is kind of hot, maybe even a little out of his league if he's being completely honest, but all that considering, they haven't exactly spent time in the same circles, or hung out together like this ever, ... until now!

Opie appears in the doorframe now, a little notepad in hand, and to Tara's relief, he changes the subject altogether and with it freeing her from Jax's scrutinizing gaze. "You hungry? We were gonna order some pizza."

She's not hungry at all, simply has no appetite after her ordeal, but she also knows it's just her nerves and if her dad was here he'd probably make her eat something, so she reluctantly agrees, telling only half a lie. "I'm not really hungry, but I'll eat a slice." She shrugs her shoulders at the last word, as if to come off as more at ease, which she doesn't feel at all.

"Any preference on toppings? Anything you can't stand at all?" Opie asks, tapping his pen against the little notepad in his hand, coming off either nervous or impatient, which, she's not really sure.

But Tara just shrugs her shoulders again, she won't make a fuss and will just pick off anything she doesn't want, it's not like she feels much like eating in the first place. "No, I'm fine with whatever. I'm easy."

A smirk appears for a fraction of a second on Jax's face, he's quick to hide it biting down on his own lip and turning his head away from her towards Opie behind him, but she's caught it and it almost makes her want to shrink further into the seat in hiding. "I'm easy too." He replies to a question Opie didn't direct at him, and Tara can feel the blush rising in her cheeks, wishing she hadn't given him a chance to tease her.

His reputation as a bit of a flirt proceeds him, although she can't say or recall ever having been on the receiving end of his so-called charms. And right now, under the current circumstances she's not really amused, but rather annoyed by it.

"Alright," Opie replies clearly un-amused as well, shaking his head at something, before he disappears back into the kitchen around the corner where the phone is mounted on the wall, when Jax turns his attention back to her now, noting the untouched cup of tea in her hand, before he asks. "Want something else to drink?" Tara shakes her head no.

He looks over his shoulder at the blanket draped over the back of the sofa. "Are you cold? Want a blanket?" Again, Tara shakes her head no, but Jax rambles on, feeling slightly guilty for making her blush, so now he's trying to make up for his insensitivity. "You know, if there's anything you want, need, whatever, just ... just let us know, alright?" He sounds sweet, and she can tell he's being genuine this time when he looks over at her, fiddling with a lighter he'd pulled out of his pocket moments ago, and Tara simply nods her understanding.

He seems almost nervous to her now, sitting there, not sure what to say or do with himself, and strangely his uneasiness makes her feel more at ease, like she's not the only one feeling awkward in the room for the first time tonight.

A silent beat or two passes, and they both look at everything but each other, taking in the countless knick-knacks Piney has sitting on every inch of free space around the room, when Jax finally tries to break the ice with small talk. "So, how old are you?" He suddenly asks out loud, but then adds. "I mean, are you a Sophomore or a Junior?" He wants to groan inwardly at his own stupid attempt to pry some words out of her, because he already knows the answer, knows she's going to be a Junior, just like Ope and him.

"I'm gonna be a Junior after the summer break." She bites her lip for a second, contemplating, before she adds. "We actually had AP English together last semester." They've had several of the same teachers and classes over the years, but AP English was the most recent one she can recall.

Jax snaps his fingers as if he just now remembered the same thing, as they both blurt out "Mrs. Rice." at the same time.

They nod in unison, before Tara surprises him when she adds. "I don't think she likes me."

"Why'd you say that?" Jax replies without missing a beat, relieved that they found something to talk about that doesn't seem so utterly forced.

Tara shrugs again, she's doing that a lot tonight, and meets his blue eyes that are focused solely on her now, making her almost want to hide away again, because a boy shouldn't be allowed to be this pretty to look at. "I don't know, I think that class just isn't really my strong suit."

Jax smirks a bit at that, finally settling all the way onto the sofa, leaning back and propping his feet up on the coffee table, clearly much more relaxed now. "It's AP, as in advanced placement, darlin', something about it must've suited you just fine."

Is he teasing her, or is he serious? Tara can't tell, but there's that word again, 'darling', and the way it flows so easily from his lips this time makes her forget to call him out on it.

She leans to the side and finally releases the cup of tea she's been holding this entire time from her death grip, putting it on the small side table beside her, before she looks back at him and crosses her arms in front of herself. "I think I just do better with facts, factual stuff, you know, like science, and math, ... concrete stuff, that sort of thing. With the books she picked last year, and had us write those god-awful essays on them, it just gives you too many different ways to interpret what's going on, and I don't like that." She shakes her head along with her last words. "And God forbid she doesn't agree with your interpretation, then you're screwed."

"Hmmm." Jax looks at her almost puzzled. "That's my favorite part, the interpretation, I mean you can pretty much come up with anything, bullshit your way through it as long as you can back it up with something in the story or book."

"I don't know." Tara shakes her head to herself, meeting his eyes again. "It's just not that easy for me. I guess not everyone's as good at bullshitting as you." She smirks, glad for the lightheartedness of this conversation, and he smirks right back too. It amazes her how easily he is to talk to.

"You've got that right." He agrees suddenly. "Bullshitting is a skill in itself, but hey, I'm free to tutor you if you want, honey." He opens his arms in a welcoming gesture and gives her the biggest tooth baring grin she's ever seen on him.

But before Tara can reply with some smart-aleck comment in return, Opie appears back in the room. "Giovanni's running behind on deliveries, said it'll take up to an hour, but we can pick it up sooner. So, I'm gonna go get those pizzas real quick?"

"Alright." Jax nods and chimes in, content in his spot on the couch, not moving a muscle. "Pick up a movie too, man. Something funny."

Opie looks back at her as if he's just about to say something when Tara beats him to it. "Can I come with you?"

"Um." Opie seems a bit unsure for a moment, looking from her back to Jax for a second, before he nods at her in return. "Yeah, sure."

Tara gets up without missing a beat, slipping on her shoes that are sitting in front of the recliner, before she starts following Opie out the room.

For a moment Jax hesitates, but then he quickly gets up too. "Guess we're all going then." He mumbles under his breath, just as he's catching up with them, falling in step right behind her, as they all trail after Opie out the front door.

Jax can't recall a girl ever dismissing him in the middle of a conversation to leave with Opie instead, and even though he could never admit such a thing to his best friend out loud, it bothers him somehow that Tara Knowles did just that. Choosing Opie's company over his ... it stings, to say the least, and it definitely has bruised his ego just a little too!

X

Author's Note: This is a prequel story to 'You, and me, and our boys'. It's my version of Jax and Tara falling in love as teenagers, and I think my idea is different from most stories that I've seen over the years. I wanted to post this first chapter/intro to see if there's even still an interest in this kind of story, since there are already so many teenage Jax and Tara stories out there to choose from.

I'd really appreciate it so much if you'd leave me a review/comment with your thoughts. Thanks in advance for your input.


	2. Your call, darlin'

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

Without further discussion, they all step outside, but unbeknownst to Tara, both Opie and Jax keep watchful eyes on their surroundings. They have one job to do tonight, the club is counting on them to keep the girl safe, and they aren't going to fuck this up.

So they all pile into Piney's pickup truck, Opie gets in behind the wheel, from the passenger side Tara climbs into the middle, her muscles and bruises protesting in pain, making her wince at even this small incline to climb inside. Out of the corner of her eye, she can see Jax offering his hand, trying to help her, but she powers through it and pretends she didn't see it, so eventually he drops it without saying a word, before he climbs into the seat right next to her. 

Even though the truck has a single bench seat, easily fitting three men, it did not however have much foot room for the person sitting in the middle. The floorboard is elevated in front of the middle seat, to accommodate the manual stick shift, and you have to basically lift your leg over to the other side and sit with your legs spread to sit comfortably. 

For a grown man, nothing unusual since most of them sit that way to begin with, but for a teenage girl of Tara's size, it is an awkward way to sit, to say the least, especially considering that the driver would constantly be shifting back and forth, right in front of her too. 

So to preserve one last shred of dignity, Tara doesn't do that, instead she keeps both her legs on the passenger side of the gear shift, knees pressed tightly closed, as much as she can, to not invade too much into Jax's personal space right beside her.

But of course, leave it to the blonde teenage boy to point out the obvious, treating her like she was some kind of prissy girl, who'd never sat in a pickup before. "You know you can put your left leg on the other side, darlin', you'd have more room, probably be more comfortable that way," Jax says, pointing to the other side of the stick shift while he speaks. 

"I'm sorry, do you need more room?" Tara meets his eyes and asks without missing a beat, and Opie feels a little less tense when he finally hears her more confident tone of voice come through again for the first time tonight.

"No, don't worry about me, I'm fine." Jax shakes his head, and then moves his legs just a little, to show that he has more than enough room still. 

"Well, then ... no offense, guys." Tara dryly replies, looking up at Jax for a second again, who's raised a cigarette up to his lips, lighter already in hand. Before she dares a look at Opie on the other side of her, smoking already, and adds just as dryly. "But I don't open my legs that wide around boys I barely know." 

What follows are gales of laughter from both boys, and Tara smirks and then even blushes a little, when Jax finally stops laughing and looks past her to meet Opie's eyes instead, raising his eyebrows almost to his hairline, when he says grinning. "I like her."

Opie's still grinning too, because this is the girl he's come to know. He puts the truck in reverse and slowly backs out of the driveway, then quickly puts the truck in drive and starts heading down the street.

Both windows are rolled down, a cool summer breeze flowing through the cabin of the truck, and Tara pulls her long hair together into a low ponytail, using the scrunchie she'd shoved into the pocket of her sweats earlier, while both guys smoke away in silence as if this is the most natural thing to them at just sixteen years of age.

"Could we make a quick stop at my house?" Tara suddenly interrupts the quiet, finally giving light to her true intentions all along why she wanted to go along with Opie, but she doesn't miss the way the guys share another look between them, like they've been doing a few times tonight.

But before either one can even answer her, she tugs at her grey sweats and her shirt, trying to make her point. "I wear this to sleep in, and this t-shirt isn't even mine, it's my dad's. I just want to change into some jeans, one of my own shirts, and I also forgot to grab my toothbrush."

"Cops might still be there." Jax pipes up.

"So?" Tara replies and shrugs her shoulders again. "It's my house, they can't stop me from getting something out of my own house." 

"Yeah, but ..." Opie starts, but then the words die down on his lips, and he shares another look with Jax, suddenly unsure what to say exactly.

"What is it?" Tara stares at him, having caught the look he'd given his best friend just now.

Opie sighs, because knowing Tara, it would be easier to just come right out and say it. "My dad asked Jax and me to keep an eye on you? Because that guy is still alive and out there somewhere." 

"Okay," Tara replies. "I appreciate that, but what does that have to do with me grabbing some clothes out of my room?" 

Opie flicks the ash off of the cigarette out the window, before he glances back at her for a second. "I'm pretty sure my old man will lose his shit if he finds out we took you with us to get pizza, let alone make a pit-stop at the scene of the crime along the way?"

Tara scrunched her eyebrows together. "So what ... I'm your prisoner? I'm not allowed to leave?"

Opie lets out a frustrated sigh. "Look." Jax chimes in for the first time now, realizing Opie isn't quite sure what to say, so he's coming to his defense. "Of course you're not our prisoner, but when the club left, it was implied that we're not supposed to leave the house, so we're already pushing our luck bending the rules here, darlin'. The quicker we all get back, the less likely Piney will find out. Not sure if you've ever had the privilege to be on the receiving end of Piney's anger, but trust me, it ain't fucking pretty."

"It will only take like a couple of minutes, it's not like I'm packing for a vacation or something." Tara begins to plead her case with them, but then on a whim decides to change her tactic and suddenly adds. "Or I can get out right here right now, walk the rest of the way to my place, and won't be your fucking problem at all anymore. Your call." 

"Jesus, your old man wasn't kidding when he said you're a fucking handful," Opie mumbles under his breath, but after a few more seconds he abruptly pulls into the nearest empty driveway to turn around, since he'd already missed the turn-off to the street where she lives. 

And while Tara tries her best not to openly smile in triumph, Jax right beside her does and shakes his head in a bit of amusement, wondering just why Opie has never mentioned knowing this girl to him before.

"Why don't you go on and get the pizza, and I run in and get changed and pack some clothes for tomorrow, and you just come get me again on your way back. Saves us time that way, if you're really that worried about Piney coming back soon." Tara offers as a solution, looking back and forth between the two of them for a reaction. 

Opie shares another look with Jax, and Tara can see the reluctance in both their faces, but then Opie finally nods, just in time as he pulls up to the curb right in front of her house and comes to a complete stop. No sign of Charming PD anywhere at this point, the house looks dark and empty, as if nothing of importance has taken place here earlier tonight.

"Alright, you and I get your stuff, while Opie gets the grub," Jax says, extinguishing the last of his cigarette against the outside of Piney's truck, before he flicks the end of it out of the window, and shoots Opie a look. "We'll stay inside until we see you pull up." 

But just when Jax reaches for the door handle, Tara speaks up. "Why can't Opie come with me, and you go get the pizza instead."

Another glance between the two boys and this time Jax can barely keep the obvious irritation of being dismissed by her off of his face, but before he can speak, Opie does the talking for them. "Jax isn't allowed to drive my dad's truck anymore."

"Why not?" Tara inquires, looking confused.

"It's a long story," Jax replies now from the other side of her. "It's either you and me doing this, or you'll have to keep wearing what you are. Your call, darlin'." He repeats her words to them from just a few moments ago, adding the term of endearment that at the moment doesn't really sound like one, and gives her a pointed look. 

"Fine, let's go then," Tara says, and nods towards the door for him to open it already. 

Jax quickly climbs out, and this time he doesn't leave her a choice, and basically lifts her out of the truck when she seems to struggle for even a second. But neither of them says anything about it, just merely a look is shared, before Jax shuts the door on the truck and Opie takes off without so much as a look back.

The streetlights in front of the house, mixed with the full moon and clear sky, illuminate everything enough for them to be able to see, even considering how late it is already. When they're walking up the driveway, it suddenly dawns on Tara that she doesn't have her keys with her, never even brought them over to Piney's in the first place, and to the best of her knowledge, they're still in the house, probably sitting on the counter of her vanity table in her room. 

She checks the front door anyway, after all, the house had still been packed with Charming PD by the time she'd taken off, but it's no surprise to her that the door doesn't budge. But she plays it off well before Jax can even ask, and comes right out without a trace of embarrassment in her voice. "We've gotta go 'round back, use the spare key. I left mine in the house earlier." And Jax silently follows her along, hot on her heels, to the black wrought iron fence that runs along the side and around the back of the house. 

He's still keeping a lookout for anything suspicious, even though he really doesn't think the guy would be stupid enough to still be hanging around once the cops had shown up earlier, but you can never be too sure. So while he's busy looking over his shoulder, trying to focus on anything possibly lurking in the shadows of the neighborhood surrounding them, Tara's attempting to climb the fence by herself.

"Fuck." She suddenly curses out in a low whisper, holding her side in obvious pain, standing in front of the only five feet tall fence, and is rewarded with his full attention again at once.

"What's going on?" Jax whispers back and steps closer to her.

Tara shakes her head in frustration. "I've climbed this damn fence more times than I can count since I was little, but ..."

"You're hurt." Jax finishes for her, because it doesn't take a genius to have figured that out by now, judging by the way she winced just getting in and out of Piney's truck. 

Tara just nods, averting his eyes because she's embarrassed, but Jax doesn't linger on the subject, doesn't ask her what or where it actually hurts, but instead just intertwined his fingers, locking his hands together and holds them out in front of her, his palms facing up, so she can use it like a step.

She hesitates for just a split second, but then puts one foot on his hands, holds onto the fence with one hand, bracing herself on his shoulder with the other and he quickly gives her a successful boost up, reaching up and holding her by her waist until she sits down securely. _Like a crow on a wire!_

She's sitting atop the horizontal iron bar that runs along the top of the fence, wondering for a second how painful it would be to just jump down in her condition, but before she can even finish that thought, Jax climbs across with ease and speed, the metal slightly vibrating under her from his movement. And then he's already standing in front of her, reaching up for her waist and is pulling her down towards him before she could even think to protest. "We need to hurry and get inside, you being out here in the open makes me fucking nervous." 

"Thank you," Tara answers sweetly at first, for his help to get over the fence, before she's making sense of what he's just said. And she's smart enough to know what he's getting at, knows Jax is worried the guy might be lurking behind one of the neighbors' bushes or in the shadows of a tree, and with a gun could easily finish her off from that short distance. "He doesn't have a gun." She whispers back. 

"What?" Jax asks at first, wondering if he's heard her right as they head towards the back of the house, noting how their surroundings are much darker now since they no longer have the benefit of the street lamps that are lining the road, there's only the bright big moon overhead to light up their way now.

"I said he doesn't have a gun, just a knife," Tara repeats still talking in hushed voices, as Jax follows her to the back porch, but he can't help it and has to ask. "How do you know that?" 

"Because he pulled a knife on me. If you had a gun, wouldn't you point that at someone instead?" Tara replies as if it is a no-brainer, but Jax taps the Ka-bar knife on his belt for a second, making sure she sees him do it, before he replies. "Maybe he just prefers using a knife." He feels pretty confident with his choice of weapon.

Tara tries not to roll her eyes at him, but she can't bite her tongue. "Or maybe he's merely sixteen and doesn't own a gun."

"He's our age?" Jax asks in surprise, a one-track mind at the moment that's all about protecting her, and has either missed or is completely dismissing the way she's just teased him amidst it all. 

He's turning away from her again, being the look-out, while Tara's bent down, looking for the fake rock that holds the spare key inside, hidden in the pretty flower bed she'd started planting earlier in the spring.

"No, he's a grown man. I was kidding." She replies, starting to work the key into the lock now.

When Jax hears her unlocking the door, he turns around and stops her just in time before she's pushing the door open. He takes the key from the lock and pockets it, pulls her behind him, and simultaneously steps in front of her, pulling his knife from its holster now too, not taking any chances. 

Up until this point, Tara hasn't really felt all that nervous coming back, or maybe she's just successfully convinced herself that there is nothing to be nervous about, and put on a brave face, but the way Jax is acting now has her suddenly scared all over again, and has her rethinking her own idea. Coming back for something as trivial as a change of clothes starts to sound dumber with every passing second. 

They step inside the quiet darkened house, Tara's right behind him, he's reaching back with his free hand, making sure she stays hidden behind his bigger frame as they take small steps further inside, before Jax reaches over and flicks on the lights to the hallway by the door.

Her bedroom is to the right of them, and he flicks the light on there as well before they both step into her room, him ushering her now ahead of him.

He nods towards the wall for her to stand, makes her wait between her bedroom and closet door, while he checks her closet, checks the on-suite bathroom too, even goes as far as to bend down and checks under her bed for her, and for a moment Tara's reminded of her father doing that to check for monsters in her younger years.

Never in her wildest dreams would she have predicted or pictured that Jackson Teller would be in her bedroom like this, wielding a knife, checking every crevice for some bad guy that's after her. It seems so utterly surreal to her, like she's caught in some twisted mixture between a dream and a nightmare.

But she shakes those thoughts away, waits for Jax's approving nod to allow her to relax and venture further about her own room. "All clear here, so do your thing, but hurry, while I go check the rest of the house. Close and lock your door behind me, alright?"

"Okay. Thanks." Tara nods, and watches him leave, doing as he instructed her and locks her bedroom door behind him, she's almost shaking now at how nervous his cautious demeanor makes her.

But she tries once more to push her fear away and doesn't waste any time, quickly shrugs out of her clothes, and pulls on a pair of jeans along with a black top that actually fits her. She then grabs another couple of her favorite things to wear, shoves them hastily into an empty old backpack she found sitting on the bottom of her closet, and hurries to get her toothbrush and a few other toiletries she had forgotten earlier too.

She also grabs her small black purse, checking to see if her wallet is still inside, grabbing her little bottle of perfume and some make-up off of her vanity and shoves that in too, but to her surprise, what she can't find are her keys. Maybe she's left them in the little catch-all bowl on the little shelf in the living room across from the armchair. She does leave them there sometimes instead, she'll just have to check and see.

Then she sits for a moment on the chair by her vanity, taking a deep cleansing breath, clutching her bag and her purse, ready to get the hell out of here now. No longer busy, her heart is starting to pound faster in her chest with every second that's ticking by, because Jax is taking longer than she thought it should take to check the rest of the house. But she tells herself that he's never been here, doesn't know the layout of the place, and he's probably just being thorough, or at least she hopes that that's what's keeping him ... nothing more.

Just as that thought appears in her head, there's a little knock on her door, followed by an almost whispered "Darlin', it's me."

Tara gets up quick, swift fingers unlocking the door now without hesitation and for a split second she's almost tempted to hug him in relief when she is greeted with a sweet smile and friendly blue eyes from him upon opening the door. But on a closer look she notices that his smile doesn't quite reach said eyes though, and she knows it's because he saw the living room, and the way it is trashed. After all, the brunt of the fight has happened there. 

"Ready? Got your keys this time?" He asks, grabs her backpack from her and swings it over his shoulder with ease.

"No, actually, I think I might've left them in the living room," Tara says trying to convince herself, even though she could've sworn she tossed them on her vanity, right next to her purse, when she got home after work this afternoon. 

"Alright, let's get 'em, Ope should be back pretty soon too." He flicks the lights off behind her, his hand is on her lower back to usher her out of the room, before he pulls her bedroom door closed behind them. They pause just long enough for Tara to lock the back patio door beside them on their way to the living room, Jax flicking off lights along the way as well.

She swallows the lump in her throat when they have to step over and sidestep some of the mess on the floor on their way through. Her dad had told her on the phone to leave it be, so he can take stock of what's been broken, take pictures for their insurance claim too, but it's an eyesore, it disturbs her every time she sees it. 

She's leading the way to the front living room, but Jax is right on her heels, his knife's tugged away again and it's strange how it eases her mind considerably that he obviously found nothing of concern.

However that moment of ease is short-lived when Tara's rifling through the little catch-all bowl and is not finding what she's looking for. She's starting to feel a little nauseous now, cold sweat beginning to form in the hollow of her back when she lets the reality set in that her keys aren't here either. She quickly glances around the rest of the room again, it's such a mess, but no, they're not here.

But before she can bring voice to her sudden panic, Jax interrupts her when he speaks up. "What kind of dog do you have? And where is he?" When he'd checked the rest of the house, he'd noticed the dog bowls on the kitchen floor, still food and water in them, but no dog in sight.

He's standing in the little reading nook by the front window, facing the street, the blinds are closed, but he's holding open a little gap, peeking through, keeping an eye out for Opie pulling up with the truck.

"Oh ..." Tara shakes her head, suddenly so flustered and nervous, but still letting her eyes scan over the stuff around the floor once more just to make sure, while she answers him. "He's a big mutt, not even sure what he is. He's at the vet, he's been throwing up the last few days, so my dad dropped him off on his way to the airport this morning. He's pretty old." She rattles out the explanation way too fast, spinning around then, can't keep up the small talk about her pet anymore, and can't keep the panic from her voice another second longer either. "I ... I can't find my keys. They're supposed to be here, but they're not, but this is where I would've left them."

"Charming PD probably took 'em, had to lock up somehow." Jax offers as an explanation without missing a beat, turning in her direction because he took notice of the shaky and scared tone in her voice, even though his mind was brewing over something else at the moment. Her dog.

"Right." Tara nods her head in a temporary moment of relief. "You're right, that's probably -." Instantaneously her eyes flicker up to the front door before she even finishes that sentence, but she can already see it. "Oh shit." She rushes to the door, noting how just the bottom lock is engaged, the one you can just pull shut behind you when you leave, but the deadbolt is still unlocked. Charming PD would've made sure to lock that if they had taken her keys.

"What?" Jax says and steps around the corner, right beside her, but she doesn't have to explain a thing, his eyes scan over the locks and he's caught on just as quick as she did. And then he reaches up, locking the deadbolt in place now, before he quickly flicks off the lights too, leaving the house back in the dark again, just like they'd found it.

"What are you doing?" Tara asks in a hushed voice, not understanding how being in the dark is a good idea considering what they've just discovered.

"If he's got your keys, darlin', you really want him to know you're back home?" Jax whispers back, and even though it's dark, there's enough light coming in from the streetlamps through the blinds that he can see her nod her head in understanding. He reaches past her, looking through the blinds, mumbling under his breath. "Where the fuck is Ope?"

Tara's hiding her face in her hands, she's visibly shaking, barely able to contain her panic now. She had been perfectly safe at Piney's house, what the fuck was she thinking wanting to come back here tonight. She feels like such a child right now, suppressing the urge to cry out for her dad, God, what she wouldn't give for him to be here right now.

But Jax brings her out of her dark thoughts when he reaches out for her. She flinches at first, hasn't expected his touch, but his voice is low and soothing and she lets him pull her into his arms. "Hey, it'll be alright. I won't let anything happen to you. I promise"

He manages to sound downright convincing for her benefit, but he himself is starting to have a very bad feeling about all of this.

This isn't just some random break-in, he obviously has staked out the house, somehow knew her dad would be gone, got the dog sick, getting rid of it too, leaving her helpless and alone at home, completely oblivious to the fact that she was being targeted.

This also meant that the guy might've been out there all along, had been watching the house this whole time, waiting for her to come back tonight to finish the job, before her old man got back in town again. _Shit!_

"Where's your phone?" He whispers, to hell with Piney's wrath, they could be in deep shit here and he's not chancing it.

"There's one right over there." She nods in the direction of the smaller living room with the TV, between here and the dining room, while she whispers back in a hurry, suddenly having the same idea as he is. Let's call the police.

Jax looks out the window once more, but when there's still no sign of Ope, he slips off her backpack and leaves it by the door, grabbing her hand and tugging her along, careful not to trip and fall over the mess between here and there, thankful that their eyes seem to have already adjusted to the darkness again.

He lifts the receiver up to his ear, quickly dialing the number he has memorized by heart, waiting for the cue then asks her for her number. At first, Tara looks confused for a split second, but gives it to him anyway, and he punches it in fast, before he quickly hangs up. 

"I thought you were calling the cops." She brings voice to her thoughts in another low whisper.

"No, I paged Samcro." He replies just as quietly, and takes a seat right by the phone, perched on the armrest of the big oversized lazy-chair. Running a soothing hand up and down her back, and pulling her into his side again. "Trust me."

"So, now what?" Tara says, just slightly allowing herself to relax a bit, mostly due to his reassurances.

"Now we wait for Piney to call back," Jax replies confidently. 

They wait patiently for the phone to ring for several long minutes, but when it doesn't, Jax makes some more calls, paging his other 'uncles', other members of the club, every number etched into his mind, memorized for moments just like this one. He's leaning out of her way, but still keeping his hand on her back when Tara enters her phone number each time. Waiting and hoping one of them will finally call back before too long, because he's not sure how much longer he can keep her from calling Charming PD instead. 

But when still nothing happens, Tara goes back to the window by the front door, checking if maybe Opie has pulled up yet, while Jax watches her from the other side of the room, but stays within reach of the phone should it finally ring.

They don't speak, just sit and wait in complete silence and darkness, and Tara swears her heart is beating so crazy fast in her chest, that she's convinced Jax can hear it on the other side of the room.

Tara's looking out the window, still keeping a look-out for Opie, when there's suddenly a noise coming from the back of the house, it startles them both, and she spins around the same instant Jax comes to a stand from his seat in the chair.

Their eyes meet when they hear a noise again, and from the sounds of it, it's someone trying to unlock the back door. Their eyes are still connected across the distance, Tara looking back at Jax in a panic, he raises his finger up to his mouth, telling her to keep quiet, but next makes a gesture with his hand, also telling her to come over to where he is, so she does, careful not to trip or step on something that could make a noise.

The door to the coat closet right across from them is still open from when he had checked the house earlier, so he quickly ushers her inside, getting in after her and pulls the door almost all the way closed. Thankful that the hinges are well oiled and don't make a sound. He's leaving just a small sliver of a gap so he's still able to see out, when he unsheathes his knife once more out of its holster on his belt.

He blindly reaches back for her with his other hand, catching her arm and lets his hand slide down to her hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze, because he can hear the panic in her labored breathing alone.

Jax still hangs onto that small glimmer of hope that it's just someone from the club coming to check out the place, or a CPD deputy coming back to check up on things after maybe a neighbor had called, or maybe it was Opie, having caught wind that something was up and had parked down the road out of sight. 

All of these different scenarios rush through his mind, but they are all shattered when the person in question finally steps into the living room and comes into -albeit obscured- view.

Even in the darkness of the house, it is easy to tell that it is neither Ope, nor a cop, nor a Son. The guy is playing it smarter and is wearing a mask over his face this time, but still leaving only one other option in Jax's mind.

Jax can feel the adrenaline pumping through his veins at full force at the thought that this is not only the guy that had attacked Tara earlier, but he might also be the guy that has already brutalized and murdered four other women in Charming over the last couple of weeks. The implication sickens him to his stomach, because it means that he will surely stop at nothing to silence the only person who could identify him, which meant Tara. 

Jax holds his breath, watching the guy as best as he can through the small gap between door and doorframe. Watches as he looks about the place, carefully stepping over some of the wreckage he'd left the place in earlier, when he starts heading towards the dining room, directly bypassing them in just a handful of moments.

In a split second, Jax makes the decision that they can't just stand here like sitting ducks, waiting to be discovered, and slaughtered. So he knows he'd have to jump the guy should he even look like he is about to open this closet door. 

And just when it seems like that is going to happen, the phone finally rings, startling and causing the man to spin around in the direction of the sound, and with it giving Jax the upper hand and opportunity to catch him off guard. So Jax quickly pushes the door open and charges at him at full force, causing both of them to tumble to the ground.

The phone continues ringing while Tara stays hidden in the darkness of the closet, scared frozen in place for a moment, while she watches in horror as the fight breaks out. They punch each other, taking turns, blow after blow, and every time she thinks Jax has gained the upper hand, the guy somehow makes a comeback and manages to pummel Jax just as badly in return.

She finally snaps out of it, starts scanning the floor for Jax's knife, because somewhere it got lost in the scuffle, and when she can't see it, she looks around for anything she could use as a weapon instead, and takes note of her father's bag of golf clubs leaning in the corner next to her. So she quickly pulls one out and emerges from the closet, holding it with two hands as if it was a baseball bat, ready to take a swing to come to Jax's aid.

The phone stops ringing just when the intruder realizes her presence and turns her way, but to her dismay he successfully dodges the swing she takes at him with the golf club in her hand. But it's enough of a distraction to give Jax the chance to gain the upper hand again, he swiftly kicks the guy in the back of his legs, causing him to fall to his knees, then wraps his arm around his neck in a chokehold, squeezing with everything he's got while the guy keeps struggling against him, clawing at Jax's arms in a desperate fight for air for several long minutes. 

Tara stands there, golf club still in hand, ready to take another swing should the guys make yet another comeback, but then his eyes roll into the back of his head and he jerks for a second before he finally passes out. She stumbles back onto the couch, still shaking like a leaf, but so relieved that this is finally over.

Jax is coughing uncontrollably for a moment as he struggles back to his own feet and comes to a stand, leaving the passed out guy laying on the living room floor, he steps in front of her. He's still breathing so fast and labored, trying hard to catch his own breath as he's crouching down right in front of her, to meet her eyes.

Tara shakes her head to herself, somewhere lost between wanting to break down crying and wanting to laugh, and even though he's the one looking like a bloody and beaten mess, Jax's voice sounds full of concern for her when he asks. "Are you alright, darlin'?"

 _Is this real? Did Jackson Teller just save my life?_

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Author's Note: Thank you so much to all of you who took the time to comment or review the first intro chapter. I really wasn't sure if another J/T teenage story was warranted, but I'm glad to see that there's still this much interest.

Because of that I was just so motivated to write the next chapter for this story, that I just couldn't help myself. I hope you guys like it and leave me a few words about it. Thank you. 


	3. Catch a grenade for her

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

"Tara? Tara?" Jax snaps his fingers in front of her face in a desperate attempt to get the girl to acknowledge him or his questions, and to his relief it finally works. There's recognition in her green eyes staring back into his blue ones, and she finally allows him to take the golf club she was still clutching for dear life from her hands, putting it aside.

"I'm so sorry." Tara attempts a faint little apologetic smile when she answers him, not entirely sure what she's sorry for, but it seems like the right thing to say considering Jax's current state, which is a result of him protecting her. He's all roughed up, bleeding, and not just his face, but there's a good-sized cut on his arm too. He saved her life and took one hell of a beating for her while doing so. She still can't believe that this really just happened.

"Do you have a rope, or duct tape, or something?" Jax asks with obvious urgency in his voice, nodding towards her still unconscious attacker on the floor. "We gotta tie him up before he wakes up again."

"Right. Um ... yes." Tara finally really snaps out of her moment of shock, and Jax steps back to get out of her way, but reaches out to steady her when she struggles to come to a stand on wobbly legs at first. "In ... in the garage, I'll get it." She steps around the guy and over the newly added mess of broken knickknacks, knocked over and broken furnishings, and hurries down the hallway that leads to the garage.

Jax flicks on the lights and looks around the floor, spots the handle of his knife sticking out amongst the mess, wiping both sides of the blade over his jeans to wipe away any debris, mostly the smear of his own blood, but he doesn't holster it again.

He just leans back against the wall and keeps watch over the guy, but this time he knows better and won't hesitate to use the knife with its intended purpose should the guy come back around before he's got a chance to restrain him.

Suddenly there's a horn honking out front impatiently, no doubt that it's Ope, but of course in the same instant the phone begins to ring too, so Jax answers it instead. He doesn't waste a second, gets straight to the point and explains everything as quickly and as calmly as he can to Otto, and hangs up the phone just when Tara steps back into the room with a rope and a roll of duct tape in hand.

"I think Ope's out front," Jax says, nodding towards the front door even though he's sure she's heard the honking too, before he crouches down, rolling the guy to his side and starts tying his hands behind his back. "The club is on the way too." He adds without looking up at her, focuses on the task at hand instead.

"Okay," Tara replies, and hurriedly makes her way to the front door, but there's a loud knock already that's startling her before she can even unlock and pull it open.

"I've been out here for five minutes, what the hell is taking you guys so -" Opie starts with a rant, but his words stop abruptly when he sees the look in Tara's eyes, dares a step inside the house, and sees what Jax is doing. "Oh fuck." All color drains from his face at once when the realization hits him what has happened.

He swipes his hand down his clean-shaven face, his eyes flicking back and forth, between a beaten bloody Jax, the unconscious guy, Tara, and the mess all around them. He finally steps all the way in, hastily shutting the door behind him with a bang, and his eyes land back on her, looking her up and down. "Are you alright?" After all, they only had one job tonight. _Keep the girl safe!_

At first Tara's not sure how to answer that, because yes, Jax saved her, but no, she is not alright at all. 'I don't know' is on the tip of her tongue, but she doesn't want to overcomplicate things, so she simply nods her head for now. "Yeah, Jax saved me." Even as the words slip out of her mouth for the first time, she still can't believe they're true ... like how has it even come to this? How has this become her life?

Opie seems placated by her fake reassurance and steps around her to quickly give his best friend a hand. She follows him, steps closer too, lost in her own thoughts, and reliving everything while she listens to Jax filling Opie in on everything that has happened in his own rather colorful words.

They have his hands securely tied behind his back when they finally decide to pull off his mask, both giving Tara a look now, and she confirms with just a nod that it is in fact the guy that has attacked her a couple of hours ago. Just then, the guy begins to stir, there's movement behind his closed eyelids, Opie quickly rolls him all the way onto his stomach before the guy can regain full consciousness again, and begins to hogtie his feet too, and as Tara watches him do so she can't help but wonder where either one of them has learned how to do that so quickly and efficiently.

That thought is what's finally taking her out of her own much darker thoughts, bringing her really back to the here and now, and all she knows is that she doesn't want to be here when this man wakes up, doesn't want to hear his voice or have his eyes meet hers again. She's seen enough of him for a lifetime.

She looks around the room in a sudden rush of panic again, when her eyes finally take in Jax's face and his injuries, more visible now that the lights are back on. She can't help but feel guilty for what has happened, but also sees it for the opportunity or reason she needs to excuse herself away from this room and this horrible, horrible man laying by her feet.

"Jax, you're bleeding." She states the obvious out loud, and both Opie's and Jax's eyes flicker down to the pretty deep cut on Jax's arm. His once white t-shirt is stained deep red in several places, and red streaks of blood have trickled down every which way on his arm since he hasn't kept it still yet, nor has tried to stop the bleeding in any way.

Tara sidesteps fast around the guy on the ground, tugging on Jax's other arm, trying to get his full attention which is back on their hostage on the floor too. "We should try to clean that up, my dad's got a first aid kit in the bathroom. Come on."

Jax looks at Ope, a silent question in his eyes, and Opie just nods in agreement. "Go, I got this. You're getting blood everywhere."

"Yeah, okay." Jax agrees, glancing down at his bloodied arm once more, and follows Tara along to the bathroom near her father's bedroom.

Tara nods towards the toilet, and Jax closes the lid and takes a seat watching her pull a clean towel from the shelf, before she turns and stops short, suddenly unsure where to even start to clean him up because he's such a mess.

"Here." She holds out the towel, and Jax takes it rather reluctantly, wondering himself if she's alright with him getting it all bloody, but she answers his unspoken question when she adds. "You should press it to your cut, you know, to stop the bleeding."

"Thanks." He nods his head, and now that the imminent danger is contained, the worst behind them, for the first time tonight he's actually taking her in, and is really seeing her. He can't help but marvel how amidst all this craziness that has happened, she's managed to not only keep it all together, but she did it looking goddamn hot as ever, with no makeup, tousled wild-looking hair and red-rimmed eyes and all.

He presses the towel to his wound on his forearm, hisses when the pain suddenly begins to faze him and closes his eyes when he shakes his head to himself, in the most literal sense of the word as he's trying to shake his unexpected thoughts about her out of his mind, and it works, but only for a fleeting moment.

All those thoughts come rushing right back when he opens his eyes again. She slightly bends over, looking through the one tall cabinet for what he presumes is the first aid kit, and despite knowing how fucked up it is for him to do so under the circumstances, he can't help himself but let his eyes roam over her, head to toe, curves and all.

He's lost count how many times he's secretly ogled her from afar, but who could blame him. With her long dark hair and contrasting fair skin, those moss green eyes and pouty pink lips, and not to forget that hourglass figure of hers, Tara Knowles is undoubtedly hard to miss any place she went.

So yeah, she's caught his eyes plenty of times over the last year or two, whether it was in the halls of Charming high, at a random party, or someplace else around town. But every time he's seen her, she'd been surrounded with her own group of friends, her own little clique, sometimes even in the arms of her now ex, Logan Lockhart. She just ran in different circles as he and Ope and the guys and girls they usually hung around.

But now, now that the adrenaline was slowly beginning to fade away, and instead the enormity of everything that has happened, everything that could've happened to them here tonight is starting to really sink in, it somehow changes everything. She's here and he's here too, there's a connection between them now, he can practically feel it, it's crackling around them, like electricity in the air, or at least it is for him.

Somehow they've gone from barely knowing each other to this, this odd sense of belonging around her, a feeling he can't even begin to make sense of. Him and her, in her house, in her father's bathroom, bleeding and hurt, but also confused and incredibly attracted to the girl that's now come to a stand before him, a bottle of rubbing alcohol in one hand and a first aid kit in the other, looking rather expectantly down at him, when he suddenly realizes that she must've said something that he has missed.

"Sorry, what?" Jax asks out loud, feeling a bit like an idiot for having been so caught up in his own thoughts that he must've drowned out her words completely.

But Tara smiles a little shy herself. "I said I don't even know where to start with you."

"Right." Jax nods, but then is looking down at his arm that's slowly starting to bleed through the towel by now.

"Okay." She says following his gaze, lets out a heavy sigh, then sets everything down on the counter beside them. "I think you should put more pressure on that." She says before her hands cover his over the towel on his cut, and he bites back the pain that it inflicts when she does so.

"Yeah, okay." He agrees instead, pressing it harder to his wound, while she quickly washes his blood off her hands. She then rifles through the first aid kit, finds some gauze, quickly douses it in alcohol, and tips his chin up before she carefully starts to clean up the cuts on his face now.

"Maybe we should call the cops now, or at least call an ambulance for you, 'cause I think your arm is gonna need stitches." She suddenly meets his eyes when she voices her thoughts out loud, but Jax pulls away for a second and shakes his head in disagreement.

"No, I'll be fine. The guys should be here any minute, and one of my uncles was a medic in the military, he can stitch me up. No worries." Jax reassures her before he holds still again so she can continue to clean up the cuts and scrapes on his face.

And as if on cue, they can hear a sudden commotion coming from the front of the house, it's clear the club has arrived, his _uncles_ are here. Jax is starting to get up to greet and meet them, and wants to explain what happened in more detail than earlier on the phone, when Tara's hand is on his shoulder, pushing him back down to sit again. "Hold up, we're not finished here."

But before Jax can even protest, there's already an old familiar voice sounding off. "Jeazus Christ, Jackie." His uncle Chibs appears in the open door and curses out loud upon seeing him. "You look like shit, kid." His voice is loud for how small the room is, and he's speaking with his thick Scottish accent that can't be missed.

"Chibs," Jax says in greeting, and Tara just nods in the direction at the older man when he steps up next to her.

She remembers meeting him earlier tonight in Piney's home, the scars on his face made him stand out to her, yet he was rather quiet then, but now seems much more lively when he tilts Jax's face to the side to get a better look at his injuries. Then he pulls the towel from his arm to get a good look at that as well, before he turns his attention to the teenage girl beside him. "What 'bout you? Are you hurt too, lass?" He's speaking so fast and with such a heavy accent, that she almost doesn't catch his meaning.

"I'm fine." She replies, because all her aches are just bruises from earlier, nothing that requires medical attention or possibly stitches like Jax.

"Good, good." He replies content that the girl is alright, but then his eyes land on Jax's arm wound again instead. "I'm gonna need to stitch that for ya'. This one's gonna leave a scar." He says but doesn't give Jax even a chance to reply before he turns his attention to Tara beside him. "You've got a sewing kit?" He makes a stitching motion with his hand. "You know, a needle and thread?"

Tara nods. "Yeah, I'll go get it." And with one last look at Jax, she turns and disappears from the room, giving Jax the quick opportunity to tell Chibs what happened here tonight.

X

Tara watches in awe as the Scot pours rubbing alcohol over the black nylon thread, then pulls the bag of ice from Jax's arm and begins to stitch him up calm and methodically. Not only is she impressed by the rather rough-looking man's medical skills, but also by Jax, and how well he's handling being patched up under these circumstances.

Jax's head is turned away, his thoughts focused elsewhere, where exactly she's not sure, but he's brave, much braver than she'd be, considering his arm can't be all that numb from just holding a bag of ice to it, but he doesn't even seem to flinch while he's being sewn up right here in her father's bathroom of all places.

When he's finished, he cleans and bandages Jax's arm up, makes it look very nice and neat, like it was done in a hospital after all, and Tara would be lying if she said she wasn't thoroughly impressed by the older man's calmness and medical expertise tonight.

She herself wants to be a doctor, it's been a career path she's just recently decided on for herself, and it's still too new that she's not really comfortable sharing that with anyone just yet.

The only people she's told so far are her father and her best friend, no one else knows, not even the overzealous guidance counselor at Charming High, but for a moment she almost wants to speak of it, wants to say the words out loud, and pick this man's brain for his thoughts on the matter as if it could sway her one way or another. She doesn't though, just clears away the medical supplies, the trash and throws away the bloodied towel, so her father doesn't find it when he's coming home and gets worried for no reason.

X

To say that Jax is confused, and pissed off even, when the club decides to call Charming PD after all, would be an understatement. He'd tried so hard to keep Tara from calling the police, that he can't help but feel downright stupid now when both Tara and him are brought into different rooms of the house by two deputies, to give their statements separately.

The rest of the evening goes by in a bit of a blur for Tara. Charming PD arrests the guy and brings him down to the station, Opie and Jax get their asses handed to them by the club, Piney being the loudest and meanest, while she waits in her room, feeling downright out of place in her own home at the moment.

On one hand, she feels incredibly bad for the two boys getting chewed out because of her, all because she wanted to come back here, but on the other hand, she's also relieved that the guy's been caught and behind bars, and no longer out there roaming the streets of Charming.

And then everyone eventually leaves, the cops, the club members, and last but not least she's locking up the house and climbs back into Piney's truck with Jax and Opie right beside her.

She could've stayed at her own place, now that the guy is caught, and for the first moments of the ride to Opie's house she wonders if she should have, because of the sudden angry vibe she's getting from the boys on either side of her.

"I'm really sorry." She suddenly blurts out, clutching her backpack to her, looking from Opie to Jax when they turn their attention to her for the first time since they've started driving. "I didn't mean for you guys to get in trouble. I know it's all my fault." She adds because it's the truth. If she hadn't pushed, practically forced their hands to let her stop by her house, none of this would have happened.

"No reason to be sorry, darlin'." Jax is the first to reply and reaches out for her hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze, and it's an odd gesture she thinks for a boy his age, but then again, if she's learned anything tonight, it's that Jax isn't really who she thought he was at all, nor does he act much like other boys his age, or at least he hasn't tonight.

Opie clears his throat, interrupting her and Jax's little moment, unintentional or not, with his angry outburst. "My old man's so full of shit." It's short and straight to the point, and he doesn't elaborate at first, and neither does Jax.

Jax just nods his head in agreement. "Yeah, he is. They're all fucking full of it."

The silence stretches on, until Tara can't take it anymore, can't hold her tongue. "What do you mean?"

Opie pulls into his driveway, the house is dark, Piney's Harley nowhere in sight when he cuts the engine and turns his attention wholeheartedly to her. "If things hadn't played out the way they did, that guy would still be out there right now, going after you, or after another girl, but instead we caught him."

"We?" Jax scoffs out loud, and he shoots Opie a look.

"Whatever, man, you know what I fucking mean," Opie replies, and meets Jax's eyes, who now nods in agreement too, and to Tara's relief she realizes they're not mad at her after all, but rather how the club and Piney had reacted and handled the situation after they'd arrived.

But then the sound of a motorcycle echoes through the street, before the Harley quickly pulls into the driveway beside them, coming to a sudden stop, yet, to everyone's surprise, it's not Piney, but Chibs instead.

"Let's talk." He says after cutting the engine, and nods towards the house, dismounting his bike and unbuckling his helmet, while Opie and Jax share a confused look before the three of them climb out of the truck to follow the biker inside.

X

Tara's in the kitchen, reheating a slice of pizza in the microwave, and she can't decide if it's a good or a bad thing that Chibs, Jax and Opie have disappeared in Opie's bedroom to have this conversation without her, in hushed voices behind a closed door.

She doesn't really understand what's going on now, what this argument is about. All she knows is that the guy who tried to go after her is behind bars tonight, that she is safe here, and that by this time tomorrow her father will be back and her life will return back to normal once again.

So she sits, waits and even though she's still not hungry, she picks at her slice of pizza, trying to eat something, while she hopes that the boys will keep her company again soon, because being left to her own thoughts wasn't the best idea at the moment. She welcomes the distraction of their presence instead.

X

Opie just shakes his head, and Jax is practically fuming, watching Chibs light up a cigarette to calm his own nerves, before the older man offers his pack to the both of them, which the boys take him up on despite their current disagreement.

Jax lights up his cigarette and takes a long drag, shaking his head in disgust, before he exhales the fumes from his lungs again. "She's gonna have to appear in court, tell the whole fucking world what he did ... or tried to do." Then he scoffs when it suddenly dawns on him. "Fuck, I'm gonna have to too. My mom's gonna lose her fucking shit, man."

"What about bail?" Opie suddenly pipes in, looking from Jax to Chibs. "How does that work? Is that fucker gonna get out on bail?"

Chibs shakes his head, looking from one boy to the other, his voice still rather hushed, not wanting the girl down the hall to overhear what was being said. "It won't come to that, boys."

"Meaning what?" Jax's shrugging his shoulders, not understanding why the club made the call to hand the guy over to Charming PD instead of taking care of the problem themselves. "You should've killed him when you had the chance." He blurts out the words in a loud whisper, anger flashing in his eyes, but he's caught off guard when Chibs suddenly grabs him by his still blood-stained shirt and roughly throws him against the wall. So hard that a picture frame falls to the carpet, but it doesn't break.

"You've got in a brawl tonight, got a few good licks in, got that adrenaline pumping, gettin' your cock hard, and suddenly you wanna go 'round killin' people, huh?" Chibs is just as pissed now as Jax had been a moment ago, maybe even more so.

He jolts the teenage boy hard against the wall again, barely able to reign in his temper. "You think takin' a man's life's that easy? Jeazus Christ, you've got no idea what the hell you're talking about, kid ... and I hope neither one of ya' ever will."

Chibs finally lets go of Jax, leaving the teenager looking back at him in confusion and also newly brewing anger, but he knows better than to say anything else, instead just watches as the Scot calms down again himself.

Chibs shakes his head again, these kids just don't understand that this is all he can tell them, his voice sounding eerily constrained. "That bastard will be transferred to County by tomorrow morning, the little lass is safe, she won't have to testify in court, and neither won't you, Jackie ... but you've gotta let this go, both of ya', keep ya' mouths shut, especially in front of the girl. You gotta let it play out. It's club business now, yeah? Understand?"

His eyes flicker back and forth between the two boys, waiting for their reply, their agreement, a sign that they understand what he's trying to tell them between the lines, which he receives with just a nod from the both of them, yet a still angry scowl looking back at him as well.

X

It seems like every light in the house is on when Tara wakes up and stumbles sleepily out of Opie's bedroom in the middle of the night. She blinks a few times trying to adjust to the light now, momentarily listening if she can hear Jax and Opie still talking in the living room down the hall, but it's all quiet, she can't even hear the TV, and she figures they've finally fallen asleep too.

She rubs the sleep out of her eyes for a second, blindly reaching and turning the doorknob with her other hand, and pushes the bathroom door open. But she's hit with a cloud of hot steam, taking her by surprise when she looks up just as Jax tugs a towel around his waist. "Oh shit, sorry." She mumbles out the words, hasn't expected anyone to be in here, let alone find him practically naked, and quickly steps back out, pulling the door closed again too.

Wow, she can't help the blush rising in her cheeks when she hurries back into Opie's room, the image of him half-naked still fresh in her mind. Of course she thought of Jax as good looking, you'd have to be blind to not think of him that way, but truthfully so were plenty of other guys that she knew, some of whom she'd dated, yet she can't think of anyone looking quite as hot as he just did.

Still, after he'd so heroically saved her and now seeing him in nothing but a towel brought a whole other array of thoughts about him to the surface, and she'd be lying if she said she isn't surprised herself by the way she is starting to feel and think about him. This isn't supposed to happen, she isn't supposed to fall for someone like Jackson Teller.

She tries to shake the image and thoughts of him from her mind, closing her eyes and hopes to fall back asleep, but moments later there's a sudden knock on the door, jolting her fully awake yet again.

"Yeah?" She answers, quickly sitting up in bed, clutching the comforter to her chest like a shield of armor, when the door creaks open and the light from the hallway lights up the room around her.

"I was wondering, since you're up, mind giving me a hand?" Jax asks, donning nothing but a pair of sweats now, searching her face from his spot in the door.

"Um ... sure, with what?" She asks, loosening the tight grip on the blanket, searching his face in return, but with the light behind him like this, his whole frame is nothing but a large outline of a man looming in the doorframe.

"Changing my bandage." He points to his arm. "Tried not to get it wet, but I did."

"Oh, ... yeah, I can help with that." She folds back the comforter and climbs out of bed, falling in step behind him as they walk quietly down the hall, back to the bathroom.

He sits down on the edge of the bathtub this time, and even though she avoids meeting his eyes, she can feel them watching her every move with intense scrutiny. He watches her unravel the wet bandage from his arm, carefully reapplying some of the ointment Chibs had told him to use over the stitches, before she wraps another clean and dry bandage around the wound again.

"I'm sorry you got hurt because of me." She suddenly says, while she's fastening the little wrap clips to hold the bandage in place.

"Don't sweat it, darlin', it ain't that bad." He shoots her a smile when she finally looks up from the task at hand and meets his eyes, and really takes in the nice shiner that has already formed around one of his eyes. "Besides, chicks dig scars, right?"

Tara can't help but smile at the way he's cocking his head to the side just a smidge, actually looking right at her and waiting for her to answer him. "I don't know, I've never thought about it."

"Hmm." He makes the sound as if he's thinking, or maybe he's agreeing with her, she's not really sure which. He remains seated, while she packs away Piney's first aid kit again, throwing away the old bandage on top of her clothes from earlier last night.

"Can I ask you something?" He suddenly says, and Tara actually looks over at him and meets his eyes this time before she nods in agreement.

But he looks away from her now for a moment, second-guessing if he should really pry and ask this out loud, before his eyes flicker back up to meet hers and he says. "That guy, when we were fighting, every time I thought I had him, he was like ..." Jax shakes his head for a second, trying to think of the right simile or analogy. "He came back for more, like he's fucking Michael Myers or some shit."

"Yeah?" Tara drawls and looks back at him confused, none of that had sounded like a question.

He runs his hand through his wet hair for a moment, before he looks back at her again. "No offense, darlin', but you weigh what? ... Maybe a hundred pounds soaking wet? How the fuck did you get away from him? How did you fight him off?" The way the expression on her face changes has him instantly regretting the question, but it is too late, it's already out there.

Tara sighs deeply for a moment, folding her arms in front of herself, leaning her hip against the sink, that moment when it happened rushing back to her at full force when she lets herself think back on it.

She's proud of herself that she manages to answer him in a very level tone of voice, sort of detached from it all when she starts to explain what happened, or rather how it happened. "He knocked me around pretty good, I fought him off as long as I could. Then he was holding me down, but he suddenly let go to ... to undo his pants, so I kicked him, you know, _there,_ as hard as I could, and it was enough to get away and run out the door. I called the cops from my neighbors house." She shrugs her shoulders. "That was pretty much it."

"Jesus Christ." Jax curses under his breath, meeting her eyes again, apologetic. "I'm so sorry, I shouldn't have asked."

"It's okay." She shrugs one shoulder again, trying to brush it off like it didn't affect her like it did, but he can see right through her.

He suddenly stands, reaching out for her hand, squeezing it lightly, his thumb running soothingly across her skin. "No, it's not okay, but I'm so glad you got away ... glad that motherfucker's locked up now."

"Yeah." Tara nods her head this time. "Thanks to you." She adds and leans up suddenly, giving him a quick kiss on the cheek, before she spins on her heels and heads out the door. "Goodnight, Jax." She tosses back at him over her shoulder, but can't bring herself to actually meet his eyes again now.

"Goodnight, Tara." He replies solemnly, flicking off the light in the bathroom as he watches her disappear into Opie's room, shutting the door behind her.

He runs his hand through his hair once more, not just at a loss for words, but also at a loss about how this exchange with her makes him feel.

What is it about her that's got him all worked up? Is it the whole _damsel in distress_ cliché, or what? He shakes his head to himself, not knowing the answer to his own internal questions. All he knows is that there is something different about her, ... and right now that _something_ would have had him catch a grenade for her tonight without so much as a second thought!

X

Author's Note: Thanks for the messages and reviews for this story, I'm so glad you all liked it. Not much progress in this chapter yet, but it was needed to get a bit more insight into their current state of mind as teenagers, not the adult versions of Jax and Tara we've come to know and love. So what do you think? Leave me a few words please. Thank you.

P.S. There's a scar on Jax's left forearm that can be seen as early as the pilot episode, and this is how I pictured he got it, just in case anyone was curious.


	4. A boy named Sue

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

Tara's awakened by a knock on the bedroom door, and when she finally pries her eyes open, blinking them awake and pulls the sheet back from her face, the sunlight filtering in from the window lets her know it's already morning. Then there's another knock, and she suddenly realizes that she hasn't answered yet, so she does. "Yeah?" She croaks out, her voice sounding still heavy with sleep.

The door slowly creaked open just enough for Jax to partially step inside, his big frame hovering between door and doorframe, smiling sweetly at her when he speaks. "Hey, ... morning." He's dressed in clean clothes, jeans, and another white t-shirt, but his hair looks like an adorable mess, and he's got several abrasions on his face, and a very prominent shiner around his right eye, that can't be missed. 

"Morning." She replies sitting up, taking in his battered appearance with sorrowful eyes. A flash of guilt overcomes her at the sight of him, along with a tinge of heat when she suddenly remembers the sight of him in the bathroom last night. But then she can't help raising her hand to cover her mouth when she can't stop the sudden yawn from escaping her.

"Piney's making breakfast. Told me to wake you up." Jax says, another sweet smile gracing his lips as he takes her in with a scrutinizing gaze now, that makes Tara want to hide behind the sheets once more.

She nods, embarrassed by her thoughts and wonders for a second how obvious they show on her face. But now that she's awake the smell of bacon is unmistakable in the air, and unlike last night, she actually is starting to feel a little hungry now, and hopes her stomach won't start to growl loudly any second now and embarrass her even further. "Okay, thanks. I'll get dressed real quick."

"Alright." Jax shoots her another sweet smile, before he pulls the door shut behind him again and heads back towards the kitchen.

X

Opie and Jax are already sitting at the kitchen table, Piney's standing at the stove, cracking another egg into the pan in front of him, when he glances over his shoulder as she comes into view in the doorframe.

"Good morning, sweetheart. Have a seat." He smiles sweetly at the younger girl, before he returns his attention back to the pans on the stove in front of him.

"Morning," Tara replies, looking from Piney to the boys at the table, already eating. 

"Morning," Opie replies too, but Jax only nods in greeting this time, his mouth full of food, and pulls the chair beside him out for her to take a seat in, which she does. 

"Did you sleep alright?" Piney's looking back at her over his shoulder once more, spatula in hand, and when Tara nods her head in reply, he asks. "Hope you like your eggs scrambled, that's about all I can do."

"Yeah, scrambled is fine." She replies, and sits rather awkwardly amongst the boys, her hands folded in her lap, unsure of what to do with herself for a moment.

She can't help but think once more about how strange it is to be sitting here, to have spent the night here, to be having breakfast with the Winston's and Jax as if nothing bad had happened last night. It's utterly surreal ... and she's still trying so hard to sort out her feelings about everything that has happened. There's still lingering fear when she thinks back on the guy that attacked her, and then there's gratitude, and even small butterflies in her stomach when she dares a sideway glance at Jax, but most of all, for the moment she feels safe again, and that's a feeling she's decided she'll never take for granted ever again.

"Want something to drink? Coffee, a glass of milk, some orange juice?" Piney asks, then looks back at her once more, taking her out of her thoughts. "Or a nice cold beer?" His face split in half with a grin, as if he'd just finished telling an elaborate joke.

"A glass of milk sounds good." She replies, and before she can say anything else, Piney's backhanded Opie in the back of his head, not hard at all, but just enough to get his attention, and barks out the order. "Make yourself useful, boy, and get the girl some milk." 

Tara's quickly getting up herself, feeling bad for Opie. "I can get it myself."

But Jax is already on his feet too, before Opie even has a chance to react. "Sit, darlin', I got it." And he's already walking over to the dishwasher, getting a clean glass out for her, before he grabs the carton of milk from the counter near Piney and pours her a glass.

"Thanks." Tara smiles sweetly back at him when he hands it to her, and Jax smiles just as sweetly in return, while Opie's rolling his eyes at the exchange, without either one of them even taking notice.

Piney finally steps up to the table and places a plate full of eggs and bacon right in front of her. "Here, eat up." He's quick to pull a fork from the cutlery drawer and hands that to her as well, before he points with his thumb over his shoulder, in the direction of the stove right behind him. "There's plenty more, so don't be shy."

"Thank you," Tara replies, looking down at her full plate, before she glances back up at the much older man. "This is probably more than I can eat already." 

"You're too scrawny, little girl, we gotta beef you up a bit," Piney replies teasingly, and wipes his hands on a kitchen rag, taking his time when he does so, and gives her a chance to take a few bites, before he speaks up again. "So I talked to your old man earlier, he's catching a flight out around eleven this morning, and he should be back later this afternoon. I've got some things to take care of today, but you're welcome to stay here until he's back, or ... well, whatever you wanna do, sweetheart." 

Tara quickly swallows the bite, and clears her throat, picking with her fork at the eggs on her plate. "Thanks, I'll probably just go home, besides, I gotta go to work later this afternoon. But ... well, I just wanted to say I appreciate everything you've done for me." She glances up at Piney, but then looks to Opie and lastly at Jax, before she adds. "All of you."

"You're welcome," Piney replies, but clears his throat before he can't stop himself from asking. "Are you sure you wanna go to work today though? Under the circumstances, I bet they, whoever you're working for would understand it if you didn't feel up to it. I mean, -." 

"Yeah, I'm sure." Tara interrupts him. "By now I'm sure all of Charming's already heard about what happened, so if I don't show up, they're gonna assume I'm on my deathbed, so ..." She cracks a smile, and so does everyone else in the room, because the girl's got a very valid point. "So the sooner I show my face, the less gossip I'll have to deal with, later on, you know." 

"Yeah, that sounds about right," Piney answers, nodding in agreement. "Good for you, sweetheart, good for you." 

X

Opie raises his hand in a casual wave, and Jax throws up the peace sign, just two fingers, in her direction before Tara turns at last and disappears inside her home, closing the door behind her in a rush.

Opie puts the truck back in drive, starts pulling away from the curb, before he finally lights the cigarette that's already hanging from his mouth, and takes a long slow drag.

They drive on in complete silence for another couple of minutes, just smoking away, each with their own little agenda running through their minds.

Jax doesn't want to come off as too eager or too obvious, but after a while he just can't bite his tongue another moment longer. "So what's the deal with you and her?" He flicks the ash off his cigarette out the open window, looking over at his friend, trying his hardest to come off and sounding indifferent, yet an almost accusatory glare in his eyes is giving him away.

Opie's looking away from the road just long enough to meet Jax's eyes, shooting him a puzzled look in return. "What deal?"

"Tara." Jax clarifies, in case it wasn't clear who he was talking about. "She seems pretty comfortable around your house, around Piney and you. I'm just surprised you never mentioned her?" Jax glances back at Opie again, trying to read the expression on his face, to get more insight before his friend even bothers to reply out loud with words.

"I did mention her." Opie rebuts without missing a beat, scrunching his eyebrows together in another expression of confusion. "I told you about her ... a bunch of times, actually."

"Bullshit." Jax quips back just as quickly, because he might miss a small detail sometimes when Ope's telling him shit, but he'd definitely remember if his best friend had told him about Tara Knowles, Charming high cheerleader, hanging out at his house.

Opie just scoffs. "Yeah, I told you that my dad likes to drink with a neighbor from a few streets over, trading war-stories and shit, and that his kid's coming by to pick him up and hangs out sometimes."

Now Jax realizes that he had in fact heard Opie say something like that every now and then, but still, it seems like his best friend had intentionally left the most important details about all of that conveniently to himself.

"His kid?" Jax sends him a 'are you bullshitting me' look. "You just left out the part where 'his kid' happens to be a hot chick that goes to Charming High with us?" 

At that Opie can't help the little smirk that appears on his face, because Jax wasn't completely wrong about what he was implying and accusing him of. Because, yeah, he had worded it just so that Jax wouldn't get a clue about who he's been hanging out with from time to time.

Truth be told, she wasn't just hot, she was nice, and funny, and smart, so yeah, he'd wanted to get to know her, figure out if there was maybe a spark or something between them that would warrant to pursue her further, close the deal, without Jax's presence and interference.

So Opie's remaining quiet, tries his best to bite back the smirk and is not answering his friend just yet, instead, he pulls the truck into the parking lot of the small family-owned video rental place, and finds them a spot to park. 

His silence, along with his facial expression however speaks volumes to Jax. "So you like her? That's why you've kept her hanging out with you to yourself?" Jax asks out loud, having put two and two together without Opie having to actually explain. It all made sense, can't really blame him, because with a girl looking like that, he might've done the same thing if roles had been reversed.

Although the thought of Opie hooking up with her, or worse, has already hooked up with her, doesn't sit well with him at all. At least not after all these unusual feelings he couldn't explain about her, that somehow got stirred up in him last night. He'd found himself lying awake on the couch half the night because of her, and said feelings about her. 

"It's not like that." Opie suddenly replies, much to Jax's surprise, looking over at him now that he's cut the engine to the truck, finishing off the last of his smoke before they were going to head inside. "I was just trying to see if there was something, you know, ... but turns out there isn't." He adds rather cryptically, but the meaning of his words isn't missed by Jax.

"You sure about that?" Jax gives him a disbelieving look, even though it takes everything he's got to not crack a smile at the tiny spark of hope that Opie's words have ignited in his chest. "She was definitely more into you than me." He reluctantly admits out loud, because as much as he feels something for her, he'll step aside if he has to, won't come between Opie and his girl if there is more to it after all.

Opie just shakes his head, but bites back the little chuckle Jax's words actually bring out of him. "She just happens to know me, and doesn't know you from Adam. Don't take it so fucking personal, bro." He shoots Jax a little grin now, before he flicks his extinguished stub out the window. "Besides, I'm pretty sure she's got a boyfriend." A memory of seeing her walking hand in hand with one of the jocks down the hallways of Charming High pop into his mind.

"No, she doesn't," Jax replies, shaking his head, and Opie's giving him a questioning look, but before he can ask how Jax would know that, he's already elaborating. "If you were a girl, wouldn't you have called your boyfriend after what happened last night? The only person she called was her old man, and her best friend, some chick named Emma, who's apparently out of town for another week and a half." He really hadn't intentionally been eavesdropping, but while Ope was in the shower, and she'd been on the phone in the kitchen, he couldn't help overhear the gist of her phone calls even if he'd tried not to listen in.

"That's true." Opie nods in agreement, but then raises his eyebrows at Jax, and takes in the battered face of his before he adds, gesturing about Jax's face. "But you didn't call your girl after what happened last night either, just your mom."

"Right." Jax quips back, and swipes his hand down his bruised face, and actually looks ashamed at the mentioning of his girlfriend, because in all the craziness of last night, she'd been the furthest thing from his mind. "Fuck." He adds, cursing under his breath, flicking the rest of his cigarette out the window, but tries to ignore the shit-eating-grin on Opie's face, who was obviously enjoying his sudden realization about his already existing relationship. 

"Man, you must've got it bad for Tara, if Amy has completely slipped your mind." Opie can't hold back, actually laughs out loud at his own words, before he pulls the key from the ignition, and looks over at Jax once more. "Maybe it's time to cut her loose."

"I know," Jax admits his agreement, shaking his head to himself because he knows his feelings for Amy have not been what a guy should be feeling for his girlfriend for quite some time now. Hell, maybe he'd never really felt towards her like he was supposed to, he realized that now with all these new emotions whenever his mind went back to Tara. "I will." He vows suddenly, and he means it, there was no reason to drag her along in this nonexistent relationship. 

They both get out of the truck, and start heading towards the entrance of the little store, when Opie turns his attention to Jax once more and says. "By the way, you've gotta cut out all that 'darling' bullshit with Tara, she's not into that."

"I don't think she minds," Jax answers in reply, just as they reach the door. 

"Yeah, she does." Opie nods his head when he's pulling the door open for them. "Because she knows you call every girl in school that, trust me, bro, she fucking minds."

X

 _Three days later_

Gemma knocks on her son's bedroom door, but doesn't really give him a chance to extend an invite, merely waits a few seconds before she's barging through the door, a laundry basket full of folded clothes in her hands.

She still catches him waving his hand through the air trying to fan away the cloud of smoke around him, and can't help herself but lets out a little laugh. "Awe, that's sweet."

"What's that?" Jax asks, taking the bait, sitting up with his back against his headboard, a couple of books scattered on the bed around him.

"You ..." She says, giving him a sweet look, when she puts the basket down at the foot of the bed, and begins looking through it. "... still trying to keep up this ridiculous charade about smoking, when this room smells like a cum-rag's being used as an ashtray."

Jax just shakes his head at his mother's observation, obviously, it wasn't true, he has an actual ashtray hidden away in his nightstand, but still, a little grin's tugging on his lips, because what was he supposed to reply to something like that coming from his mother's mouth. 

Gemma turns and starts to put his clothes up for him, opening and closing the corresponding dresser drawers while she does so, before she looks back at him over her shoulder. "I mean, would it kill you to open up a window in here every once in a while, let some fresh air in?"

"Last time I was airing out my room, I got yelled at about the AC running non-stop." He's quick with a reply this time, but he already knows he won't win this one either. 

Gemma purses her lips at that, giving him a knowing look. "Sneaking out in the middle of the night, and leaving your window wide open hardly constitutes 'airing out my room', smartass."

He doesn't reply this time, just keeps looking through the pages in the book on his lap, while she finishes up with his clothes, before she turns back around, giving him another long observing look. "Shiner's fading pretty fast." She comments on the fading bruise around his eye, but then further asks. "How's the arm, the stitches, sweetheart?"

"They itch." He replies without further elaborating, fighting the sudden urge to scratch at them, and is finally looking up from the page and meeting her eyes for a moment.

She steps up next to him, nudging him to scoot over a bit, so she can sit down beside him. "What are you looking at old yearbooks for?" She notes the open page in his lap, then gives the other books a glance, before her focus is back on the page he's currently looking at.

He shrugs his shoulder, "No reason really." He tries to play it off as best as he can, hopes she will buy it and let it go.

"Right," Gemma replies with a hint of sarcasm, before she turns her head and actually meets his eyes, adding with a much heavier dose of sarcasm now. "Let me guess ... you're missing your teachers already, and you're sad that school's out for the summer." But then she quickly smirks, giving him a knowing look. "So what's her name?" 

Jax bites back the smirk that's trying to come through, because nothing gets past his mommy dearest. "Tara."

"Ahhhhh." She nods her head knowingly, had already figured as much by the way he'd talked about her when they'd discussed what had happened, but still, Gemma gestures towards his injuries, pointing out the obvious. "The girl that's cause for all this ... damage."

"Mom," Jax answers in a warning tone, and shakes his head at her. "Ope and I didn't have to go along, so all three of us fucked up, it's not all on her." He gives her a look that conveys just how strongly he feels about that. He's sick and tired of it, really, because this argument has played out a handful of times already since his step-dad Clay and his mother have gotten back in town just yesterday. 

"Yeah, I know." She concedes, knowing already she will not win this fight, and picks up one of the yearbooks beside him, realizing it's from Junior High, she says teasingly. "Trying to see if she was an A-cup with braces? Or maybe if she takes bad pictures?"

He hides his frown, not sure what's bothering him more; the fact that his mother actually believes to know what he's thinking, or that her assumptions make him come off as an incredibly shallow douchebag.

He remembers all too well what Tara looked like back then, and he sure as shit doesn't need a yearbook picture to remind him. The truth is that he just wanted to look at her, but since that makes him sound too much like a pussy, he tries to sound nonchalant when he answers her. "Naw, just curious what she looked like back then."

But as expected, his answer isn't juicy enough for his mother, so she puts the older yearbook away, and grabs the more recent one sitting open in his lap from him, putting it down in her own lap instead now.

Gemma's eyes are glancing over the page, before they land on the picture of the girl in question, and begins to give her own assessment over her appearance. "She is pretty cute, good skin, nice hair. Can't really tell if she's got a nice rack from that headshot alone though."

She studies his face, trying to gauge his reaction to her words, and he's trying his best to come off as indifferent to her comment, but fails miserably, and she can't help but smile a bit at her son's facial expression when she flat out asks him for a response. "No comment on the matter from you, huh?"

"Nope," Jax answers short and sweet, shaking his head a little, then swipes his hand down his face, trying to wipe away the smile from his lips because this time his mom was right. _Tara is pretty fucking cute, with a nice rack to boot!_

"Huh. Never seen you quite so tongue-tied." Is all Gemma has to say to that, but she's trying to understand why this girl has suddenly sparked such an interest in him, that he'd gone so far as to dig the old yearbooks out just to look her up. "Bet she was pretty grateful to you, saving her life and all?" She gives him a look that conveys the obvious innuendo in her question, her eyebrows raised almost to her hairline, but her lips pulled in a straight line in contradiction.

But Jax knows what she's implying and is quick to clear that up for her, cocks his head to the side a bit when he answers. "Not _that_ grateful, mom, ... she's not like that." God, he wishes she would leave already so he could get another smoke and might actually finish it this time.

"Not like what exactly? Like pretty little Amy?" Gemma replies teasingly, reminding him of his on-again-off-again relationship over the last couple of months, before she hands the book back to him and stands, leaning down to cup his chin with her manicured fingers. "Trust me, honey, if the situation calls for it, they're all like that. Little Miss Tara's no exception, she's nothing special." She quickly kisses his cheek and turns on her heels, grabbing the empty basket from the bed on her way to the door.

But then she suddenly stops and turns towards him, digging in the back pocket of her jeans with her free hand. "I almost forgot, found this in one of your jeans." She tosses him the key, and he catches it with ease in mid-air, looking it over already, when she can't help but satisfy her curiosity. "What's it go to?"

"I dunno, swiped it from Ope's room to mess with him, totally forgot I had it." He lies straight to her face, because he really doesn't want to bring up Tara again when his mom is so close to almost making it out of his room.

"Don't forget to give it back then. God knows what it goes to, could be Piney's." She urges, shaking her head at their childish behavior, always hiding each other's shit, and finally leaves his room.

X

Jax pulls up to the curb in front of Tara's place in his mom's SUV, because his beater was permanently parked at T-M, until he had the time and money to get it fixed up again.

For the last three days he's been thinking about checking up on her, been wanting to go see her, and thanks to his mother finding her spare key in his laundry, he finally has found a good enough reason to actually do so.

But as soon as his eyes land on the front door, he's already on high alert again when he notices that there's no car in the driveway, but the door is slightly ajar, which Tara wouldn't do if she was home alone, nor would she do it if she'd left.

So he rushes up the drive, tossing the not even halfway finished cigarette to the ground, grinding it out the same instant he's pulling his knife from the holster on his belt, before he takes the step up onto the porch and peeks through the open door, slowly pushing it further open for him to step inside.

The house is eerily quiet upon entering at first, but he noticed how the living room's been cleaned up. For a second he contemplates calling out for her, but when he hears a noise coming from the other end of the house, the kitchen, he simply decides to follow the sound and check it out for himself instead. 

Jax rounds the corner from the dining room and finds a grown man standing by the cabinets in the kitchen, his broad back is turned towards him. But Jax's heart's already beating out of his chest again, a moment of déjà vu rushing through him when the familiar feeling of adrenaline rising comes back to him, before he confronts the intruder loudly. "What are you doing in here? Who the hell are you?"

The man turns around almost calmly, a coffee mug in his hand that he's taking a sip from, while he's eyeing the younger man from head to toe, and recognition flashes in his eyes before he smiles just a little. "Who the hell am I?" The guy points a thumb at his own self when he repeats Jax's question. "I'm the guy that's about to whoop your ass, kid, if you don't get that butter knife out of my face."

A look of confusion, mixed with a tinge of anger crosses Jax's face, but before he even has the chance to ask anything else, Tara appears right behind him in the same instant, startling him when she says. "Jax? What are you doing here?" Then she looks over to her dad. "Dad?" She shakes her head in confusion. "What the hell's going on?" 

"Dad?" Jax repeats in a questioning tone, looking over his shoulder now, right at her, before his eyes land back on the man in front of him, but he can't see any resemblance, not even now that he knows there's supposed to be a relation.

"Yeah, dad. I'm her old man." The man quickly replies, before Tara can chime in again, cracking a smile in amusement at the expression that crosses the blond teenager's face.

 _Jesus Christ!_ "Shit." Jax curses, quickly sheathing his knife again, looking back and forth between Tara and her father in obvious embarrassment, his cheeks tinting slightly. "Sorry, I thought ... I saw the front door open, but no car in the drive, and ..." The words die down on his lips, but the meaning is as clear as day.

Tara's dad can't help but let out a little chuckle at Jax's obvious discomfort, and even Tara can't help but crack a smile too. "Don't sweat it, kid." He holds out his hand for Jax to shake now. "I'm James Knowles, and I gather you're Jax, Jackson Teller, the guy that saved my baby girl the other night?" He voices it like a question, but it isn't really that, rather a statement, before he adds. "My daughter's told me all about you, I guess I owe you a big thank you for what you did."

Jax hesitates for a moment, because up until now no adult has actually bothered to thank him for what he'd done, but he snaps out of it, reaches out and shakes the older man's hand in return. "No problem." It's the best he can think of in response, because it seems too odd to reply with a 'you're welcome' under the circumstances. After having barged in here uninvited, wielding a knife at the man in his own kitchen.

"What are you doing here?" Tara suddenly pipes up, interrupting the little meet-and-greet between her father and her latest crush, after she's stepped up right beside the both of them now.

No longer able to hold her tongue when she's found herself wondering why Jackson has decided to stop by her place today. Had he just randomly driven by? Or had he been checking up on her, out of concern? She wonders, since she's hardly been able to keep her mind off of him after they've parted ways three days ago, it would be nice to know if he felt the same way. Thinking of Jax has become her safe haven, the place she goes to inside her head when she tries to push those scary ugly thoughts away that still overcome her from time to time. 

"Right." Jax suddenly remembers why he's actually here, and fishes the key out of his pocket, holding it out to her. "Found this in my laundry, thought you might need it back."

"Oh, that's ... nice of you, but ..." She takes it from him, glancing over at her father for a second, before she turns at the waist and tosses it in the trashcan right behind her. "But my dad had all the locks changed out yesterday, thanks though." She gives him an appreciating smile nonetheless.

"Do you like steak, kid?" James Knowles strikes up another little talk, giving Jax no choice than to pry his eyes away from Tara's sweet smile and those captivating green eyes, to meet her father's eyes instead.

"Sure," Jax nods his head, but asks rhetorically in return. "Who doesn't?"

"Alright, so maybe we'll have you over for dinner some time, bring your folks with you, and I'll fire up the grill, throw a couple of steaks on there, what do you think? It's the least I can do for what you did for my daughter."

"Yeah, sure," Jax replies without missing a beat. He wouldn't mind one bit getting on the good side of Tara's old man if it means it'll give him a reason to spend more time over here and be around her. He'll just need to figure out a way to keep Clay and his mom out of the picture, or his plan to get closer to Tara would undoubtedly crash and burn before it hardly had a chance to take flight. 

James pats him heartily on the shoulder, in a fatherly gesture Jax is all too familiar with, from all of his so-called 'uncles'. "Do you drink? You sure as shit look old enough to drink." He adds, giving him another scrutinizing once-over, assessing the over six feet tall young man standing in front of him.

"I told you he goes to my school, dad. He's in _my_ grade, my age." Tara replies in obvious annoyance now before Jax even gets another word in to reply himself.

"Right. Right." James nods his head, suddenly recalling that his daughter has in fact told him the boy was merely her age. "After what he did for you though, a drink or two won't hurt him, might even put a little hair on his chest." Her father adds jokingly.

But it's obvious that Tara's not the least bit amused, and he just smirks, dimples digging into his cheeks when he watches her fold her arms in front of herself, and gives her father a death glare that would give his mother a run for her money. 

She scoffs, shaking her head at the irony of the situation. "You're unbelievable, dad." She holds two fingers up, the likes resembling that of a peace-sign, and adds. "I swiped two beers from the fridge months ago, and you're still giving me shit about it, but he's allowed to drink?" She nods her head in the direction of Jax, but keeps her eyes trained on her father instead. 

Now it actually is her father's turn to scoff. "First off, as your dad it's my job to give you shit about drinking." And then further adds with a heavy dose of sarcasm. "And are you honestly gonna try to convince me that you haven't had a drink since the time you've swiped those beers? Nice try, but I wasn't born yesterday, kiddo."

Tara's stunt for a moment, but then relieved to be saved by the bell, or rather a honking car near the front of the house, and it becomes clear to Jax why the front door had been open in the first place, when James turns towards his daughter and says. "That's my ride, baby girl, I gotta go. Duty calls." He pulls his daughter into his arms, placing a sweet kiss to the top of her head as if they hadn't just argued at all. "Don't wait up, kiddo."

"Bye dad," Tara says in reply, when her father pulls away from her hug. 

"Nice to meet you, Jackson." He says once more as he passes by them. "I'll see you around."

"Nice to meet you too, Mr. Knowles," Jax replies as he watches after his retrieving form, but once he hears the front door shut with a bang, he turns his attention back to Tara instead. 

His eyes take all of her in now, from the nice fitting pair of jeans, to the bright red crop top, that's revealing most of her midriff. Her hair's in a high ponytail, and if she's wearing any make-up, Jax wouldn't be able to tell, because her complexion looks just flawless from where he was at. It still amazes him just how stunning she manages to look, with what seems to be such minimal effort. 

"Do you want anything to drink?" Tara asks a little bit awkwardly, suddenly unsure of what to do with herself standing in her own kitchen with none other than Jackson Teller, the boy that has recently begun to occupy her daydreams. 

"I can only offer you something non-alcoholic though. There's not gonna be any hair sprouting on your chest today, Teller." She adds teasingly, returning the smirk that appears on his face with a smirk of her very own. "We've got sodas." She says, shrugging her shoulder at him. "Want a coke?"

"Sure, a coke sounds good," Jax replies, forcing himself to not stare at her so blatantly obvious. 

Suddenly there's some barking right outside the kitchen window that overlooks the back patio, and Tara quickly hands him a chilled can from the fridge, before she says "You can sit if you want, I'll be right back" and disappears out of the kitchen.

Jax takes a seat on one of the barstools by the island in the middle of the room. He opens his can and takes a few quick gulps of the refreshing beverage, before Tara comes back in just as quickly as she had disappeared, but with a big dog following right behind her this time. 

"Hey, who are you?" Jax puts his drink down, and starts petting the dog that's come up to him to inspect him with a thorough sniff. He pants heavily, the tail's wagging nonstop, happily enjoying the attention he's getting from Jax. 

"Unbelievable." Tara scoffs, after having watched the interaction between Jax and her oversized mutt. "Bad dog." She finally scowls at him, but it doesn't come out very angry sounding at all.

She's leaning forward to cup her dog's face with both her hands, forcing the dog to look back up at her for a moment, and in the instant she's unbeknownst giving Jax a view down the front of her shirt. "You're supposed to bark at strangers, not rub against them to get petted, Sue. So much for being a guard dog, you goofy old thing."

"Your dog's name is Sue?" Jax asks out loud in an attempt to shake the image of her lacy red bra from his mind, when he watches the dog trail around the kitchen behind Tara, and now he really can't hold his tongue on the dog's name any longer. "You do realize that Sue's got fucking nuts the size of tennis balls, right?" Jax shoots her an amused look, his eyebrows raised in obvious question.

Tara rinses the dog's water bowl out at the sink before she adds more cool fresh water to it. She glances over at Jax now, trying to keep a straight face when she replies. "Really, I hadn't noticed." But then she can't help but let out a little laugh, rolling her eyes a little too. "Of course I know Sue's a _he_."

She carefully puts the bowl back to the ground, petting her dog now when he starts to drink as if he's been dying of thirst. "My dad's a big Johnny Cash fan, ... I should count myself lucky he didn't end up naming me Bill or George just for the hell of it." She answers as an explanation, leaning back against the kitchen counter behind her, but Jax is looking even more confused now than he did a few seconds ago, so she adds. "You know, from the song, 'a boy named Sue'?"

"Sorry." Jax shakes his head. "I have no idea what you're talking about, but for what it's worth, I'm glad your name isn't Bill or George either." He shoots her a sweet smile, and winks at her before he's raising the can of soda up to his lips again just to not get lost in her green eyes again. 

She returns his smile with one of her own before she suddenly comments on his appearance. "Your black eye's almost completely faded, it looks much better. How are the stitches?" She adds, questioning out loud, her eyes darting to the bandage on his arm.

Jax glances down at the bandage himself, and replies truthfully. "I think it's healing alright, it's just starting to itch sometimes."

Tara's eyes flicker up to the clock on the wall for just a second, but she instantly frowns when she's looking back at him. "Shit, I gotta get ready for work." Then gives him an apologetic look.

Jax takes the hint, slips off the barstool, and quickly finishes the rest of his drink. "Sorry, didn't mean to hold you up." Truthfully he wishes he could hold her up for much longer, doesn't want to leave now that he has her completely to himself. But he tosses the empty can in the trashcan on his way out of the kitchen, giving Sue one more pet across the top of his head too. 

"You didn't." She replies, and quite honestly wishes she didn't have to work and could spend the day getting to know him instead. But she can't, and so she follows him to the front door. 

But then something suddenly dawns on him, and he turns back around to face her, anything to prolong his stay. "Do you need a ride to work?" He throws a thumb over his shoulder in the direction of the driveway. "Didn't see a car out there." He adds in explanation.

But Tara shakes her head, smiling again though. "Thanks for the offer, but I'm good, my car's actually in the garage."

"Oh, okay." Jax nods in understanding, he should've figured as much, but he's trying to wrack his brain for anything to say to not leave things open-ended like this with her. For Christ sake, he doesn't even have her number ... _yet!_

A party Ope has mentioned to him suddenly springs to mind, stopping short already halfway out her front door, and he looks back at her again. "Hey, are you going to that party next Saturday, the one out by Lodi lake?"

"Hmmm, ... maybe." Tara answers a little unsure, she smiles at the thought that he cares enough to ask, but also that her evasiveness seems to have rattled his usual rather cocky demeanor, because not a single 'darling' has slipped from his mouth since he'd gotten here, so that was undoubtedly progress. "It kinda depends if my friend Emma's back in town by then, 'cause we usually go to these kinds of things together." She finally adds in explanation, trying to gauge his reaction in return.

"Well, if she's not back by then, you can always tag along with Ope and me, if you feel like it." He offers, looking back at her rather sweetly. 

"Yeah, alright." Tara tries her hardest to not just keep the excitement out of her voice and also from letting it show on her face, when she nods her head at him along with her reply of "Maybe I will", because she doesn't like the thought of coming off as too eager, or desperate to him.

After all, Jax has not only managed to wrap her dad, but also her dog around his little finger in no time at all, and she's just trying to retain some dignity here by not letting it show that he's already got her under his spell too.

He leans in closer, and he's so quick and nonchalant about it, like he's done this with her a million times before, that she doesn't even know what he's doing until he's already placed a sweet kiss against her forehead. Then gives her the most stunning smile she's ever seen someone of the opposite sex direct solely at her, his blue eyes shining brightly and hopeful. "See you later, darlin'."

 _Damn it, Teller, you'd almost made it!_

X

Author's note: Here's the new chapter, sorry I haven't had time to reply to all the reviews and private messages, but I wanted to take the time to thank all of you here for being so helpful, motivating and encouraging with your messages to me. Thank you so much. Please let me know what you're thinking of this, can't wait to hear from you all. Thanks again!


	5. You know Tara?

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

 _Later that same day_

The little bell over the door jingles, announcing his entrance when Jax walks into Hanna's diner, nods his head in greeting to the older waitress Laura behind the counter at the same time as he quickly pulls a piece of paper from the pocket of his jeans.

"Hey, how you doin', darlin;?" He says when he's handing the paper over to her, waits for her to read over the order just in case she's got trouble deciphering the handwriting, before she looks up and replies. "Big order today, huh? It'll take about twenty to twenty-five minutes, sweetie."

"That's alright." Jax answers, then nods back towards the door. "I'll be right out front, having a smoke."

But before Jax can turn and step back out, Hanna herself, the young owner of the diner, steps around the corner, greeting him with a bright smile when she sees him. "Hey, Jax. A little late in the day for a T-M lunch run, isn't it?" She taps her wristwatch, noting the later hour.

"Hey Hanna." Jax smiles and nods back in greeting. "You know it, we got swamped today, so guess it's more like an early dinner run." It's just then that Jax realizes that all eyes are on him, unusually friendly smiles and approving looks directed at him.

At first he's not sure what to make of it, until Hanna steps up right in front of him, sweetly palming his cheek in approval. "Heard what happened over at Tara's house a couple nights ago, about you catching that guy that attacked all those women. Might've got something to do with business picking up at T-M. You're quite the town hero."

"Oh, yeah, _that_ ," Jax replies, a big grin spreading over his face, even though he's not entirely sure what else to say, he wasn't used to being praised for getting into fights, least of all by the locals, but something Hanna said caught his attention, and he has to ask, raising his eyebrows. "You know Tara?" 

"Do I know Tara?" Hanna repeats the question scoffing, giving him an exaggerated eye-roll that he's not sure what to make of either, until she elaborates. "Of course I know her. Used to babysit her when she was just an itty bitty little thing. She's a good girl, still getting the hang of waitressing though, but she'll get there." She explains, but then gives him a curious look. "But I didn't realize that you two were friends though, or even knew each other, can't remember ever seeing the both of you come in here together." 

"Yeah, we're friends." He replies, yet is nodding with a hint of reluctance, not entirely sure if he'd just told an outright lie.

Were Tara and he friends now? Truthfully he's not really sure what they were after what has happened. He'd like to think they were friends, hopefully, they'd be even more than friends in the future, if he was being completely honest with himself. 

"Well, your friend's out back on her break, in case you wanna say hi." She smiles, but before he can say anything in reply, she nods towards the refrigerated pie display right next to them. "Want a piece of pie, on the house, while you wait?"

"Sure, thanks," Jax says, his mind already on Tara again and his eyes automatically glancing towards the back of the diner. 

"Laura? Get the boy a piece of pie at no charge." Hanna calls the other waitress back to the counter, before she turns back to Jax. "Which one, sweetie?"

"Cherry pie sounds good," Jax replies, and takes the plate and fork that Laura hands him just a moment later. "Thanks, darling." He says before he turns his attention back to Hanna once more. "You said Tara's in the back?" 

"Yeah, follow me." She waves her hand in a gesture to tell him to come along, and Jax falls in step behind her until they get to a service door that leads to the back alley, and she holds it open for him to step on through with his plate and fork in hand. "She's right out here." 

Unlike the inside, the back alley behind the diner is quiet, seemingly abandoned really, except for Tara sitting on an old wooden bench, her legs crossed, her head buried in a book, so much so that she hasn't even noticed the door opening and Jax stepping out joining her.

Jax's eyes fall on her, taking her in just sitting there, and he has to swallow the sudden dryness in his throat away, because leave it to Tara Knowles to make the pale yellow waitress uniform, that all of Hanna's staff's wearing these days, look hot as hell. "Hey." He says, for lack of a better greeting, when he finally gets his bearings back.

Tara jerks, clearly startled by the sound of his voice. "Shit." The hardcover book in her hands is dropping to her lap when she raises her hand to her heart in shock. "You scared me."

Jax can't help the smirk that appears on his face, even though he instantly apologizes. "Sorry, I didn't mean to." He steps closer to her, and she moves her bag to the other side of her, making room so he can take a seat beside her. "I didn't know you work here?"

"Started when school got out, still pretty new at it." She explains, pointing out an array of food stains on her white apron, but then gives him a curious look, noting his attire, his stained Teller-Morrow shirt, the smudge of grease on his cheek that somehow makes him even more attractive, along with the still visible cuts and scrapes and shiner, from when he'd defended her that still make her feel a little guilty. "You just got off work?"

He hurriedly swallows the bite he just took from his pie, shaking his head. "No, I wish, but not even close, I'm just here to pick up some grub for everyone. I'm working 'till closing tonight. You?" He eyes her curiously, taking another bite.

"I get off at eight, so thankfully I won't have to close. I hate closing." She explains, taking a drink from the soda can that had been sitting on the ground by her feet but was now in her hand, feeling just a tad bit strange still to be hanging out with Jax like they were suddenly friends.

A few quiet moments pass in silence, while Jax continues to eat his pie, and Tara sips on her drink, both staring off into the distance of the alley and buildings around them, glancing at each other almost shyly ever so often, because neither of them seems to know where to take the conversation from here. They both really don't know each other, don't know what to talk about without Opie around as a buffer, that much is glaringly obvious.

But it's Jax who finally breaks the ice, nodding towards the open book still laying in her lap. "Whatcha' readin'?"

Tara looks a little sheepish, maybe even a little embarrassed too for just a moment, but quickly slips her bookmark in place, before she closes the book to show him the front cover.

"Stephen King Gerald's game?" Jax reads the title out loud but there's an obvious questioning undertone to his voice as he's taking in the front cover that shows a pair of handcuffs hanging from what appears to be a wooden bedpost.

"You know it?" Tara asks, managing to look more serious again now, and Jax shakes his head no.

His eyes flicker to meet hers for a second as if to ask for her permission before he's reaching out to take the book from her.

He puts the already empty pie plate on the seat beside him, the fork sliding to the edge of the porcelain plate, almost falling off, but he catches it just in time, putting it back in the middle to stay put, before licking some pie filling off of the tip of his thumb while he turns his attention back to Tara's book in his other hand. 

He turns it over quickly, and Tara can't help but blush slightly when he begins to read the synopsis out loud, because she's already anticipating that he'll get a kick out of the beginning of what it says. "Once again, Jessie Burlingame has been talked into submitting to her husband Gerald's kinky sex games -" And just like Tara expected, Jax pauses at that, and looks over at her, he doesn't actually say anything teasingly out loud, but the way he's grinning, raising his eyebrows and his blue eyes sparkling in obvious amusement, does all the talking for him. His facial expression is a silent question about what kind of books she is into.

Tara smirks back, but tries not to seem bothered by the look he's giving her, so he turns his attention back to the book, carrying on with reading the summary out loud "... something that she's frankly had enough of, and they never held much charm for her to begin with. So much for a 'romantic getaway' at their secluded summer home. After Jessie is handcuffed to the bedposts - and Gerald crosses a line with his wife - the day ends with deadly consequences. Now Jessie is utterly trapped in an isolated lakeside house that has become her prison- and comes face-to-face with her deepest, darkest fears and memories. Her only company is that of the various voices filling her mind ... as well as the shadows of nightfall that may conceal either an imagined or very real threat right there with her."

At that last part Jax can't help but look over at Tara again, no longer amused at all, instead slightly shaking his head to himself at the plotline of the story, as he hands the book back to her. "You must have nerves of steel, darlin', if this is the kind of book you're reading after what happened at your place?"

"Hmm, not sure that I do." Tara sort of scoffs, shaking her head, before she admits, showing him the place where her bookmark's at, which was pretty far near the end of the book. "I started it a while back, before ... you know, and now I'm not so sure I can actually stomach to finish it though. I keep starting and stopping, but not really getting very far." She's even surprising herself to show her more vulnerable side to anyone, let alone someone like Jax, who she still barely even knew.

"Then don't." He blurts out, shaking his head at her, and giving her a look that's telling her that this is a no-brainer, before he digs out a cigarette from his pack. "You need to find yourself some kind of ... you know, some romantic they-lived-happily-ever-after love-story, that'll take your mind off of what happened, not make you relive it." He finally puts the cigarette in his mouth and quickly lights it, before he suddenly looks over at her, holding the cigarette out in front of him again now, gesturing with it. "Shit, sorry ... you don't mind, do you?"

"Go ahead, I don't mind," Tara replies, smiling sweetly at him, still thinking about the earnest sounding concern she could make out in his voice when he told her to stop reading this particular book. Maybe he was right? But why did he even care? And why did she find herself caring about the fact that he cared? _Jesus, when and how and why did Jackson get in her head, and how the hell will she get him back out!_

Suddenly the back door of the diner opens once more, and none other than the Chief of police Wayne Unser steps through and comes into view, taking both teenagers by surprise.

"There you are." He huffs as he steps up right in front of them. "Just the two kids I was looking for."

"What's going on, Chief?" Jax asks, tossing his hardly touched cigarette onto the ground and grinding it out again as casually as he can muster, before he can't help but squint against the sun when he looks up and tries to focus on the older man that has come to a stand right before them.

"Tara." He greets nodding at her, but she just nods her head, looking at him curiously for a long moment, before she finally finds her voice too, and replies with a simple. "Hi."

Wayne clears his throat, suddenly hesitating for a second as he tries to think of the right words to say here since he's talking to two kids. He directs his attention to Tara first. "I tried to get a hold of your father, sweetheart, but he's not answering his phone at home or the office?" 

"He's working, got several appointments today. Why do you need to find him? Is something wrong?" She can't help but ask with obvious concern etched onto her young face, and it's notable in the sound of her voice as well.

He clears his throat once more, when he feels both their eyes fixated on him now, so he decides to just go ahead and come right out of it. "It's about the man that attacked you, Michael Dunley."

"What about him?" Jax speaks up now, catching Wayne by surprise with his interruption and causing the older man to stumble with his words some more, his attention back on Tara again. "It's a ... Well, Michael Dunley died in County this morning, thought your father, and you would like to know that you won't have to testify after all." 

Then his eyes finally meet Jax's. "I've already talked to Clay and your mother. Goes without saying that you won't have to testify either, son." 

His eyes flicker back and forth between the two kids for a moment. "No subject, no trial."

"How did he die?" Tara surprises them both with the question, although Jax already has a pretty good idea how, before Wayne can even open his mouth to begin to explain. 

"He was shanked, bled out," Wayne answers, but then adds to clarify. "I mean stabbed, shanked means stabbed, sweetheart." 

"I know what shanked means," Tara replies rather quickly, but without sounding harsh or offended that he felt the need to further explain. "By who? I mean, why?" She suddenly adds. 

"Not sure, not yet at least. Looks like Dunley must've made some enemies in there right off the bat." Wayne shrugs his shoulders along with his words, but still his eyes are meeting Jax's for just a split second, wondering if the boy is aware that this was more than likely the club's doing.

"Anyways." Wayne pauses for a second, before his eyes land on Tara again. "I left a message for your father on your answering machine at home, but ... uh, tell him he can give me a call down at the station if he's got any questions or whatnot, alright?" 

Tara nods her head in reply. "Yeah, okay. Thank you."

"See you later, kids. Stay out of trouble." He tosses back over his shoulder as he starts heading for the door now, and disappears through it just seconds later.

It's basically impossible for them to not look at each other, to not let their eyes meet for a couple of seconds in a silent and wordless, yet mutual acknowledgment of what has happened, and the implications of it. That this means that the nightmare is truly behind them.

Jax is elated at the news that Dunley is dead. He wanted him dead, and was furious that the club handed him over to Charming PD instead of finishing it, yet he can't help but think back to Chibs' words from that night now. And it's all finally making sense. _'The little lass is safe, she won't have to testify in court, and neither won't you, Jackie ... let it play out. It's club business now.'_

"You okay?" The question slips out, and before he even knows what he's doing, he's wrapping his larger hand around hers resting on the bench between them.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Tara nods in reply, her skin tingling under his touch is the oddest sensation, but she still manages to give him a sweet smile in return.

But even as she holds his steely blue gaze for much too long then would be deemed appropriate for someone claiming to be _'just friends',_ she's telling herself that she shouldn't be doing this. _This is all wrong._

X

It's summer, still early June to be precise, so when Tara gets home from work that night, shortly after eight pm, it's still pretty light out, and she's secretly thankful for it, for not having to come home to a dark and empty house, since her father wasn't going to be home until pretty late that night, maybe even the next morning.

Sue greets her happily at the back patio door when Tara lets her into the house after having spent most of the day outside. Tara picks up the water dish she has left out back for her dog and carries it back in with her in one hand, quickly using her other free hand to lock the back door behind her again right away too.

Her dad has been home for the majority of the last three days, and she has almost started to feel like her old self again, almost felt safe again, or maybe she just fooled herself into thinking so, because right now, when she finds herself standing alone in her kitchen, she doesn't feel like that at all.

She pulls the biggest, sharpest knife she can find from one of the kitchen drawers, and walks from room to room, checking every window to make sure it was indeed locked, closing the blinds along the way too. Next, she checks all the doors again as well, the front door, the door that leads in from the garage, and last but not least the back patio door too, before she disappears into her bedroom, bringing Sue and the knife along with her, before she locks that door behind her as well. 

Tara makes sure all her blinds are closed before she starts to undress out of her waitress uniform. The pale yellow dress with the white apron looks downright dingy in the incandescent lighting of her room, and she has no doubt that there is a lingering smell of grease that has seeped into the fabric and in her hair too, from the countless burgers and fries that she has been carrying back and forth from the kitchen today.

"Come on, Sue," Tara says almost impatiently, slapping her bare thigh to get the dogs attention, before she's grabbing the knife, bringing it along with her, locking her en-suite bathroom door behind her too, before the dog makes himself comfortable on the linoleum floor right in front of the sink and door. 

She turns the water lever to hot, waiting it out, standing there in nothing but her bra and panties, reaching beneath the steady stream repeatedly to check if the temperature has reached an acceptable warmth, and pulls the hair tie from her hair. 

She glares at the knife sitting on the counter by the sink once more, before she reaches back, undoes her bra and shrugs out of her underwear and quickly steps under the water, letting it cascade down her body, completely surrounding her and momentarily drowning out the world around her with it.

She washes her hair, takes her time first lathering it up with the shampoo, and then treating it with the conditioner too. Next, she scrubs her face with the help of a washcloth, washing any remains of makeup away in the process, then pours a generous amount of body wash onto the washcloth once more and washes the rest of herself too, before she finally sinks down to the bottom of the bathtub after. 

She adjusts the temperature again, turning it slightly hotter now, as hot as she can stand it, then pulls her knees to her chest, hugging her legs and lowering her head, resting her forehead against her knees, and that's when the tears begin to fall mercilessly and her body shakes as the sobs start falling uninhibited from her mouth.

Ever since it happened, she's been trying so hard to put a brave face on for everyone around her, trying to pretend that what happened to her has just rolled off of her back, but right now, all alone in her shower, without her father home to reassure her safety with his mere presence under the same roof, she's losing that battle, can't keep the charade up another second longer, and so she allows herself to let go of the confusing and scary thoughts that have been plaguing her since that night, but which she's tried so hard to suppress and hide behind a fake smile instead.

She knows it doesn't even make sense, feeling the way she's feeling, knowing what she knows. That the guy is dead, and will never be able to come back and try to hurt her again, but she can't help the ways she feels, even if she tries. It's just something she knows she'll have to work through one way or another, and for now, letting the tears fall and the cries escape was the way to do just that.

Afterward, she does feel better, she's all cried out and all dried up, dressed in an old ratty-looking, yet super-soft pair of pajamas that used to belong to her mother, and a towel wrapped around her still wet hair. Tara's just lying on her bed, the knife on the nightstand easily within reach, with Sue curled up into her side, already fast asleep, while she's listening to the silence around her, trying her best to not feel afraid or make too much of every bump in the night. 

Tara glances at the alarm clock, scrunching her eyebrows together in thought as she's trying to do the math in her head, wondering what time it is in Alabama right now, where her best friend Emma is at.

She realizes it's close to midnight there already, but she rationalizes that it's summer, and surely her parents will cut her some slack regarding the late hour, especially in hindsight of what has happened.

So Tara quickly sits up, scoots back, propping one of her pillows behind her back to be more comfortable as she's leaning up against the wooden headboard and reaches for the phone her dad had hooked up in her room in an attempt to help her feel a little safer again. She then grabs the piece of paper with Emma's number scribbled on from her nightstand too, glancing at it as she starts to dial in a hurry.

As expected it rings a couple of times, but then someone finally answers, and she's relieved that the person who does answer seems neither tired, nor angry for the late-night call, and Emma's voice quickly appears on the other end of the line. 

They don't talk for long, because her dad would not be thrilled about those long-distance charges, but it still feels good to hear Emma's voice and forget for just a couple of moments about all the troubles that are haunting her here these days. 

She's tempted, very tempted indeed, and actually almost spills her guts to Emma about those odd little meetings and moments with Jax, and the way she's been starting to feel towards him, but just the sheer mentioning of his name to her best friend quickly reminds Tara why she's never shown much interest in the blond teenage boy before. It's because Emma has a huge crush on him, always has, and if there's one thing you don't do, it's going after your best friend's crush, it's an unwritten rule. _Isn't it?_

X

 _About one week later_

Tara rolls to the side, blinking a couple of times to adjust her eyes to the brightness of her bedroom, before she can focus on the time displayed on her alarm clock. It was already eleven am, and she could appreciate the fact that her dad had let her sleep in this late, considering she'd come home pretty late last night after having to help close down Hanna's diner.

She can hear some commotion in the house, no doubt her dad is in the kitchen trying to cook something for lunch, so she decides that it's probably about time for her to get up too, maybe even help him out with whatever it is he was doing, because truthfully, she was so thankful to even have him home as much as he has been as of late.

He'd moved his whole working schedule around, canceled countless things he'd had on his agenda just to be able to be at least home with her at night, and she loves him for it, so much, but somehow it still wasn't quite the same. _She still wasn't quite the same!_

Tara has never been a loner, she has always been the kind of girl that surrounds herself with people, even if it meant she couldn't truly be herself to fit in, to try to belong. 

She has had a steady boyfriend named Logan for the most part of the last school year, she has her best friend Emma, who she can always count on to have her back, then there is her second cousin Lincoln, better known as Linc, who she was thick as thieves with even though he was a couple years older than her, and who blew into town now and again from San Diego. And then there were of course a whole lot of other friends from school as well, but they weren't as close a confidant to her as the formerly mentioned, but noteworthy just the same.

Yet of course fate would have it that Logan and her had just broken up about a month and a half before school got out. Emma had left for Alabama to visit her grandparents as soon as the last school bell had rung. Linc had gone on some road trip to God-knows-where with his girlfriend, and everyone else was also either gone for the summer or too busy to be bothered. 

So during one of the worst days of her life, she'd found herself utterly alone, except for Jax and Opie, who up until that fateful day, she'd barely known. 

But she hasn't heard from nor has had any more encounters with Jax, neither at the diner, nor here at home, and truthfully she knows that it's for the better this way, because it would definitely be easier to get over him, or stop thinking about him altogether without actually having him around and in her face all of the time. That way, she hopes that by the time school starts up again in two months from now and she has no choice than to see him every day, those feelings she was beginning to harbor towards him will have disappeared again too.

But right now she doesn't want to think about all of that anymore, because today is going to be a good day since Emma was coming back home. And Tara would be lying if she said that the return of her best friend wasn't somehow making her feel like things were finally going back to normal again. Or at least that's another thing she's hoping for as well.

It's a hot mid-June day, and Tara quickly dresses in a pair of jean shorts and a tank top, then runs a brush through her hair before she pulls it together in a low ponytail, ready for a lazy day spent at home just catching up with her best friend when she comes over later today. 

She heads straight for the kitchen, where the radio is playing and her dad is standing with an apron that reads 'kiss the cook' over a mountain of meat, different cuts of steaks to be exact. "Jesus, who's supposed to eat all that?"

Then she glances around the rest of the kitchen, noting bags of chips, sodas, beers, paper plates, and plastic cutlery, amongst other things that would indicate a party of some sort was in the works. "Um, what is going on?" 

"Morning to you too, sunshine." Her dad replies with a hint of sarcasm, raising his eyes from the cuts of meat in front of him to look at her.

"Sorry. Morning." Tara mumbles, and pulls a soda can from the fridge, holding it against her temple to cool herself in this sweltering heat, before she realizes why the kitchen seems even hotter than the rest of the house. "Do you have the oven on?"

"Yeah, I've got a casserole in there." He answers, smiling back at her sweetly.

Tara's face contours in complete confusion. "Dad, what is all this food for?"

"We're having a little barbeque later, invited some of my friends, and some of yours too." Her dad further explains. "I had planned to invite the Teller's, I mean Teller-Morrow's over anyways, so ..." He spreads his arms, gesturing to the food all around, before he adds. "You know, I thought two birds, one stone."

A sudden rush of panic floods over her, but she tries her best to not let it show when she takes a seat on one of the barstools by the kitchen island. "You know Emma's coming home today, dad? I kind of had plans to just hang with her."

"Yeah, I know. I invited them, but her parents gotta unpack, got some things to take care of, so they won't make it, but Emma will be here, of course." He explains pretty nonchalantly, completely oblivious to the fact that he's single-handedly ruined all of her plans today. 

Tara takes a gulp from the soda can, trying to find her voice, because this is not how she pictured this day would go. So much for staying clear of Jax. "So you invited the Teller's? And Emma? And who else?"

"Well, Piney, Opie too. Linc's coming up from San Diego for a couple of days, a couple of buddy's from the Alibi, you know, the usual." He replies, pouring some oil and vinegar along with some spices into a big bowl and starts whisking it with the ease of a skilled chef.

"Okay," Tara replies, reality starts sinking in that the laid back day she has planned with Emma was no longer on the agenda, and instead there were probably all sorts of stuff that still needs to get done around here before guests would start arriving. She suddenly wishes he would have woken her up earlier after all. "So, ... what do you need me to do, dad?" 

"I thought you'd never ask, kiddo." He replies before he starts rattling off the to-do list. 

X

There are some speakers set up on the concrete part of the back porch, playing some rather eclectic range of songs, at a volume that leaves it still fairly easy to carry on a conversation. Most of the backyard is covered with tables and already occupied lawn chairs, with several coolers along the fence that hold beers and sodas, while James Knowles himself is working his magic on the grill, using tongs to flip the pieces of steak over in even intervals to brown the meat just right from all different sides. And inside the house, there's a little line of people forming in the kitchen, where the rest of the food is presented buffet style on the dining room table for the guests to help themselves to whatever they like. 

Tara and Emma have helped with about as much as they possibly can, and are just about to hide away in Tara's room for a little peace and quiet, trying to slip unnoticed through the living room, when their silent disappearance act is suddenly interrupted with Jax's and Opie's arrival to the party.

"Hey." Tara greets both the boys with a friendly smile as they enter through the unlocked front door, which holds a sign to urge guests to let themselves in rather than wait for someone to answer.

Opie and Jax nod their heads in greeting when they utter a simple "Hey" as well, stepping further into the house and closing the front door again behind them.

"How are you doing?" Jax greets Tara even further, leaning in, sweetly kissing her on the cheek, causing her to slightly blush, but more so from his hands that casually touch her waist, then from the kiss itself.

Emma looks downright envious for a moment, until Tara deflects the attention onto her. "Jax, Opie, this is my friend Emma." She gestures with her hands to the blond and blue-eyed, slightly taller and more slender girl right beside her. 

Jax and Opie nod back at her in greeting, tossing a casual sounding 'Hey' in her direction now too, and Tara has to bite her lip to not laugh out loud at the expression that crosses Emma's face when she's eyeing not just Jax, but also Opie like some juicy pieces of meat.

Emma is not known for her shyness, the opposite really, she's bubbly, outspoken and forthright, but right now she's practically salivating at the mouth, before she finally snaps out of it and greets them back, sticking out her hand in a weirdly adult-like gesture, taking turns shaking theirs. "Hi, heard you two saved my girl's ass that night." 

"Yeah, I guess we did." Opie pipes up smiling, before he adds. "Sorry, we're late" Turning his attention back to Tara for a moment.

"No worries, there's still plenty of food left," Tara replies and gestures towards the dining room table. "And my dad's out back, he'll throw a fresh steak on the grill for you, you just gotta let him know how you like it cooked." 

"Thanks, that sounds really good," Jax replies this time, and pats his flat stomach. "I'm starving actually." 

The guys follow the girls outside, and her dad has already had his fair share of drinks, acting overly enthused when he greets them, before he quickly gets to work on their steaks, giving his best impression of a short-order cook if Tara's ever seen one. 

So the four of them find a couple of empty lawn chairs, and carry them towards the back of the yard, away from the crowd of adults her father has invited. There they sit and hang out, while they're waiting for their meat to get grilled to their liking, which shouldn't take very long at all. 

It starts out with some rather awkward small talk amongst the four teenagers, but Tara finally speaks up with a real question.

"So, are your parents coming too?" She asks with a hint of curiosity, looking back and forth between both boys, partially just to break the ice, but also because she'd actually love to meet Jax's mother. The latter mostly because she wants to see for herself if the reputation that precedes Misses Teller-Morrow holds any truth to it at all.

"Yeah, Piney's on his way," Opie replies, taking a sip from the beer Tara's dad has handed him just moments ago. 

But Jax's eyes meet Opie's for a moment with a look that Tara wishes she could decipher, before he answers as well, shaking his head. "Mine won't make it, Clay's got club business, and my mom's helping out, babysitting a friend's kid tonight. Sorry, maybe next time." He takes a sip from his beer now too, trying to wash away the taste of the lie he just told from his tongue.

"Yeah, sure." Tara nods, but can't help but wonder why Jax would even assume that there would ever be a next time for their families to gather like this again.

X

A good long hour later, the boys have eaten and are stuffed. Some other friends of Tara and Emma have arrived, and Opie has even called a few of his and Jax's as well, and before long they all find themselves hiding out in the garage instead, away from the adults and able to actually let off some much-needed steam. 

They took a couple of lawn chairs in the garage with them, so along with the old worn-out sofa, loveseat, and armchair that's been sitting against the wall on the empty side of the two-car garage, there's more than enough seating to go around for everyone to have a seat. 

Tara brought her radio out, and her friend Joe stays busy trying to find a decent song or radio station to listen to, finally settles on a hip-hop/rap station that plays not just the latest hits, but some of the older stuff as well.

Her older second cousin Linc has actually managed to swipe one of the coolers from the backyard, beers and all, and had walked it right past Tara's dad and brought it out here to share, much to the cheer and applause and laughter of the teenagers in attendance.

So after a couple of beers, and a random joint getting passed around, not only did the little group of misfits finally managed to find some common grounds of conversation and entertainment amongst them, but Tara in particular was feeling better than she had been in a long time.

It wasn't even so much the alcohol or the weed that had her feeling more at ease, since she was neither drunk nor high just yet. But it was more a combination of the fact that Jax, Opie, and their friends seem to fit right in with her friends, and the fact that to her obvious surprise, neither Jax, Opie or she had been bombarded with question after question about the intruder that had attacked her less than two weeks ago. 

However, that feeling of contentment didn't last long after all, because then her eyes fall onto Jax sitting across from her in one of the lawn chairs, deep in conversation with Emma, who's leaning closer to him, Tara knows she's doing it to flirt, show of her boobs, but if she was to ask her she'd claim that it was to better hear what Jax is saying over the music that's playing in the background.

Everybody else seems to be talking too, paired up, and lost in their own little conversations around the garage. The beer, weed, and music helping to make everyone feel at ease with one another. 

Tara forces herself to look away, looks down at the half-empty beer bottle she's clutching in her hand instead, trying so hard to direct her focus elsewhere, but fuck it, there's just no use. Her eyes flicker back up and fall back onto the blond and blue-eyed couple sitting right across from her. Jesus Christ, if they'd ever have kids, they'd be breathtakingly beautiful. 

She tries yet can't make out the words, but watches as Emma laughs out loud at whatever Jax has said, and he laughs right along with her. It's blatantly obvious Em is flirting with him, and he's flirting right back, clearly enjoying himself, and it's in that moment that Tara feels a sudden pang of regret, or maybe it's a pang of desire or envy, which she's not sure.

But she can actually feel it, a sudden sharp physical pain through her chest, and she can't help but wonder if this was what it feels like when your heart breaks!

It's Linc that's sitting right next to her that brings her back from her moment of painful self-awareness, when he drapes his arm around her shoulder and pulls her closer into his side, placing a sweet kiss against her forehead when he does so.

"I'm sorry I wasn't here to protect you." He whispers in her ear, bringing voice to the subject she'd been so blissfully avoiding up until now.

Tara smiles sweetly, looking up at her older second cousin, who was really much more like an older brother to her. "I know." She replies at first for lack of anything better to say, but then she can't stop herself from quickly adding. "I'm fine, Jax was here, he saved me, so ... don't feel bad."

Linc just nods in understanding, knows she's not feeling up to talking about it, so he won't dwell on the subject any longer. Tara in turn closes her eyes and cuddles into his side, feeling safe and content for a second now that her mind has managed to push back the thoughts of Jackson and Emma at least for a little while.

"Don't fall asleep on me now, Tar." Linc jokes and nudges his shoulder against her, to jostle her awake, and she playfully nudges him right back with her elbow the same instant she opens her eyes again, albeit in protest.

It's almost pathetic the way she can't help but let her eyes drift back to Jax and Em again as if she has no control over her body at all.

It's then that she suddenly realizes that Em has left the chair next to Jax, it's glaringly empty and tempting all the same. Where the tall blond beauty has disappeared to, Tara can't really be sure, all she knows is that she's suddenly aware of Jax's eyes on her, and it takes everything she has to force herself to look up at Linc beside her instead. "Hey, where did Em go?" She whispers in his ear.

Linc just shrugs, before whispering back. "Bathroom probably."

"I'm gonna go check on her," Tara replies, her hand on his thigh as she pushes herself up to a stand, before she hurries out of the garage, avoiding to make eye contact with Jax at all cost as she makes her way through the small crowd of friends. 

She does find Emma moments later in the en-suite bathroom of her room, watching from the door frame as her friend reapplies some lipstick and doubles up on the black mascara that makes her blue eyes look even prettier than they already naturally are.

Emma catches Tara's eyes in the mirror, smiling brightly, happily back at her. "I think he likes me. Can you believe it, Jackson Teller likes me." She says with so much glee in her voice, that Tara feels a rush of guilt wash over her when she realizes the envy she's feeling at hearing those words come out of her best friend's mouth.

It wasn't supposed to be like this. She wasn't supposed to have feelings for the same boy as her best friend. To say that this sucked was the understatement of the year, ... this broke her fucking heart!

Despite her heartache, she tries to smile back at Emma's reflection and nods, but can't bring herself to agree out loud with actual words, even though she believes that Emma might very well be right. From the looks of it, she'd bet money that Jackson Teller did in fact like Emma Roth. _Goddamnit!_

Tara swallows the lump in her throat away, points with her thumb over her shoulder. "I'm gonna go get some fresh air for a minute, check up on my dad."

"Yeah, sure," Emma replies, still smiling brightly, before she bares her teeth in the mirror and runs her finger across to wipe away the smudge of red lipstick from her front tooth, and it's Tara's cue to leave. 

She stops by the door that leads out to the back patio and yard, smiling when she sees her father laughing out loud, sitting contently amongst his friends with a beer in one hand, a cigar in the other, and Sue curled up in the grass by his feet.

But instead of heading out back to join him, or return to the garage, Tara makes her way to the front of the house and steps out onto the front porch instead.

She's sitting down on the little stoop, the steps, trying to enjoy the lonesome quietness out here for just a couple of moments, cause she's not sure she can bring herself to go back and continue watching Emma make eyes at Jax for the rest of the evening.

She knows that she has to come to terms with the fact that whatever was going to happen between Jax and Emma was simply out of her control. Jax wasn't the first boy Emma and her have had a mutual crush on, and he probably wasn't going to be the last one either, but she hopes that these feelings she has developed towards him would fade with time. What was that old saying again? _Time heals everything!_

If that was true, then it was simply a matter of time before her world would turn right side up again and return back to normal. She'd just have to make herself scarce in the meantime, lay low and try to occupy her time otherwise to avoid him and her, which shouldn't be too hard to do, because she could always just pick up more shifts at the diner. More hours not only meant more money, but also less time spent at home, alone and afraid. It was a win-win, really!

The door to the right behind her suddenly opens and Opie steps out, nodding at her in a wordless greeting, before he pulls the front door shut again behind him.

He takes a seat right beside her without saying a word, just staring down the driveway, eyes scanning over nothing in particular, roaming mindlessly over the cars parked along the street, the houses, and the scenery of the neighborhood. 

They sit without speaking for several long minutes, Opie's nursing a beer, that he suddenly holds out to her, offering her a sip. Their eyes meet then for just a second, before she gladly accepts, takes a quick chug, and hands the brown glass bottle right back to him. 

"So Linc ..." He suddenly says, but pauses when he looks over at her, meeting her eyes again, before he adds. "He's older, huh?"

Tara nods. "Yeah, he'll be twenty-one next month." She's completely oblivious to the fact that Jax has sent his best friend after her on some sort of recon mission, to gather information.

"Wow ... and your old man's cool with that?" Opie asks with both surprise and curiosity in his voice.

Tara can't help but smirk at that, not really understanding what Opie was getting at. "Um, yeah, I mean, it's not like he's got a choice." She glances up at Opie now, confusion written all over her face, but Opie's expression is that of a blank mask if she's ever seen one.

He shrugs at her reply. "I mean, he's your old man, he could tell you not to see him, tell you he's too old for you? I mean, five years is a pretty big age difference, didn't peg your dad for the type to be cool with that."

"Wait, what?" Tara shakes her head along to her words, confused still, until she replays his words in her head, and they suddenly begin to make sense, and she realizes that there's some obvious misunderstanding. "Opie, you do know that he's my cousin, right?" 

"Cousin?" Opie stares back at her now, perplexed himself for a second, but then he can't help but crack a smile when her words sink in as well.

"Well, technically he's my second cousin, I think ... he's my dad's cousin's son." She explains, can't help but smile herself now upon seeing the smile that's still displayed on his face.

"Yeah, that makes more sense then," Opie replies, nodding along and taking another sip from his beer. "Good." He adds. 

"Good how?" Tara can't help but ask what he meant by that, amusement sparkling in her eyes.

For a second Opie's not sure how to respond to that, but he's quick to think on his feet. "Good that you're not hooking up with your cousin." He grins back at her.

Tara just laughs, elbows him playfully into his arm, but shakes her head at the mere thought.

Another long moment stretches on in silence before it's Tara this time to take the plunge and tries to face this little dilemma she's found herself in head-on when she states. "So ... Jax and Emma really seem to hit it off." It hurts her even to say it out loud, but what's the use, she might as well face the music. 

Opie has just raised the bottle to his lips and literally chokes at that, at her words, starting to cough violently, having the hardest time to catch his breath again, but when he finally does, he can't help but look over at Tara, nor can he help himself from blurting out the obvious either, albeit not very eloquently. "He's not, I mean, no, they're not ... hitting it off. Trust me."

"They're not?" Tara asks back in return, not understanding again what Opie was getting at. "I mean, they look like they are."

Opie lets out an exhausted sigh, shaking his head to himself, before he dares another glance at the smaller female form sitting next to him, undoubtedly breaking some kind of bro-code when he says. "You know he likes _you_ , right?"

"What?" Tara says, suddenly stunned.

"Jax. He likes you. Won't shut the fuck up about you." Now he knows for a fact he broke the bro-code. _Fuck!_ He's gone too far in his quest to move things along, so he quickly tries to back-pedal. "You can't tell him I told you though."

Opie scrambles to his feet, because he's already said too much, needs to get the fuck away before he digs himself an even deeper grave.

"Opie, wait." Tara pleads with him, wanting to take advantage of this rare opportunity of what Opie's able to share, but he's already through the door, glancing back at her though one last time as if something has suddenly dawned on him, the corner of his lip curving upward. "He's had a couple beers, a little weed, so you might wanna mention to him that Linc's your cousin, before shit gets ugly, you know ... just a thought."

X

Author's Note: I hope you enjoy this chapter and leave me a few words with your thoughts. Thank you.


	6. I'm not scared,well, at least not of you

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

Tara's mind is still reeling in shock from what Opie has just shared with her. _'Jax. He likes you. Won't shut the fuck up about you.' - Oh no no no no no!_

And to top it all off, he also revealed that Jax is feeling jealous about Linc. _The nerve of that guy, after he's been flirting with Emma all night!_

To say that she is thoroughly confused is an understatement. It was one thing having to deal with her own bewildering feelings towards him, but knowing that he might be feeling the same way somehow made everything so much more complicated ... but also so much worse. Mostly because it suddenly puts ideas in her head that barely had a leg to stand on before Opie had joined her out here, but now they were an actual possibility, and she instantly hates herself for allowing her mind to even go there.

Tara shakes her head to herself, because it doesn't matter how she feels, and it matters even less to her how Jax feels, if that part is even true. This can't be happening. It's out of the question, ... Emma is her best friend! _Jesus!_

Enough is enough, she needs to get her head on straight again! She won't allow Jax Teller to get to her this way, to mess with her head like this, sending Opie out here to question her relationship with Linc ... doesn't even have the balls to talk to her herself, because he's too busy flirting with Emma instead. _Jerk!_

For one, Tara rationalizes that maybe all these weird feelings she has towards him are all just residual gratitude about him saving her. Maybe if Opie had been the one who'd stayed behind with her and had beaten the crap out of her attacker, then she'd be daydreaming about the Winston boy now instead of the blond, blue-eyed heir to the Teller-Morrow garage.

 _Why couldn't it have been Opie? Things would be so much simpler if it only had been him instead._

And second, maybe the fact that she hasn't felt much like herself lately, since that god-awful night, also had her head all screwed up, and maybe none of what she was feeling was even really real. Maybe if she could just get out of her head, figure out how to not feel so scared in her own fucking skin right now, in her own home, and stop feeling like the goddamn victim, then all of this would resolve itself somehow on its own. Sooner or later, or at least she hopes it will ... for crying out loud, she couldn't even bring herself to finish reading a goddamn book!

With newly found resolve to change her own fate, Tara scrambles to her feet and slowly makes her way back into the house, and back to the garage. She can't hide out forever, or rather she won't.

Fuck feeling scared, fuck feeling helpless, fuck being the victim, fuck the feelings for Jackson Teller, and most of all, fuck Michael Dunley, for what he did to her to make her feel this way in the first place!

When Tara enters the garage, the first thing she sees is Jax, Emma, Opie, and Linc standing in a group off to the side, sipping on their beers, talking and laughing about God-knows-what, and she can't help but let her eyes flicker to meet Opie's in particular. 

The big brooding looking tower of a boy just lets a smirk appear on his lips for a split second and then nods at her, and with just that one little nod and look in her direction, he's managed to convey that he's filled Jax in on who Linc was in relation to her. 

Tara's grateful, since in his quest to keep the peace, Opie's done her a huge favor, because this way she can continue to avoid Jax for the rest of the night, and maybe if she's lucky she'll hopefully figure out a way to avoid him for the rest of the summer too.

But just as that thought crosses her mind, the four of them look her way now, both Linc and Emma even wave their hands at her, making a gesture for her to come join their little huddle, but Tara's quick to wave them off, meeting Jax's intriguing eyes for just a split second before she makes an excuse about having something to talk to her other friends about instead.

She grabs a beer from the cooler, hands it to her friend Joe who twists it open for her, and joins in on the meaningless conversation between him and Rayna, talking about everything and nothing, but mostly it's Joe pouring his heart out over his latest split with his girlfriend, or rather ex-girlfriend Cassidy. And Tara's not only grateful for the welcoming distraction, as much as knowing she's not the only person in the room with a heartache tonight. _Misery loves company!_

Tara is pretty fucking proud of herself for managing to keep up the appearance of disinterest with every minute ticking away, not once glancing over at him again for the rest of the night, or even Emma for that matter. And her blond best friend's seemingly too busy trying to impress her crush to even notice her deliberate absence by her side.

The beers she's guzzled down way too fast, along with the joint she's shared with Joe and Rayna sure do help in her cause to convey disinterest, the task getting easier with each sip and each hit, or at least she's telling herself that, until things are beginning to get too disorienting to really still care, and before too long, all just goes black.

X

A loud obnoxious bark from one of her neighbors' dogs is what eventually awakes her the next day. She's still fully dressed, curled around her pillow in the middle of her bed with Sue fast asleep right beside her. She stretches, then is groaning in pain, rubbing her temple, but to no avail, her head hurts so much. 

She's never harbored any ill will towards an animal, especially not a dog, but right now she truly considers strangling Misses Callen's dog from two houses down until he quits howling, because of the piercing pain every bark inflicts, that even pulling her pillow over her head can't seem to drown out.

So she's propping herself up on her elbows, squinting around the room, trying to fight the painful pounding in her head to recall how exactly she ended up back in her own room, in her own bed last night, in the first place. 

The last thing she vaguely remembers is drinking and smoking weed with Joe and Rayna, but everything after that is nothing but a blur. Honestly, it's not even that, not even a blur, it's more of a blank, like her mind's been wiped clean, and she'd be lying if she said she wasn't a little bit scared of what she might've done or said last night.

But all of that will have to wait, because at the moment she feels slightly nauseous as she climbs out of bed and scrambles to her feet, yet not enough to feel the need to rush to the bathroom. Thankfully she's been smart enough to only have beers the night before, or at least as far as she can recall that's all she's had.

She hasn't gotten sick from drinking since the first time she got drunk early on in her freshman year. It had been her first year of cheerleading, after the after party of the first Charming High Football game of that season. Mixing several different alcoholic beverages that night was what one would call a rookie mistake, but what ultimately really did her in was too much bourbon, and she hasn't touched that stuff ever since. The smell alone makes her want to puke still to this day.

However, she's learned her lesson the hard way that night, vowing to never mix alcoholic beverages again, and thus far she's never gotten sick again the morning after either.

Tara knows the house is probably a mess, the backyard for sure would be, and probably the garage too, but none of that matters to her at the moment. The mess would have to wait. Checking on her father, Em and Linc would have to wait. She needs to sober up, clear her head off this fog of uncertainty, and clean herself up first.

So she quickly starts the shower, locks the bathroom door behind her, strips out of her clothes, and once the temperature has warmed up just enough to be tolerable, she fumbles to climb over the edge of the tub, almost taking the shower curtain down in the process, when she clings to it as she steps beneath the steady stream. Once more finding comfort in the way the water is drowning out the world around her for a little while again.

Other than her face, she doesn't really wash up, not in the typical sense of soap and shampoo and such, but just slips to the bottom of the tub again, and rests her eyes. With her knees pulled to her chest again, she sits in complete silence for far too long, but she finally does get out when the water starts to turn cold on her.

X

She finds her father fast asleep and loudly snoring in his bed, also still fully dressed, while Linc is already up and has been busy cleaning.

So she pops a handful of ibuprofen, downs them with a glass of water, before she grabs a trash bag and wordlessly joins in on the clean-up in the backyard.

"How 're you feeling?" Lincoln dares to ask, pausing what he's doing for just a second, looking over at her, to literally look her over.

Tara arches her eyebrow at him, squinting against the early afternoon sun, before she focuses back at the task at hand, picking up empty beer bottles and paper plates off of the tables and out of her yard. "Like shit."

"You look like shit," Linc replies somewhat truthfully, but can't help but smirk a little at his own words, and the expression that crosses her face upon hearing them, before he gets back to work. 

"Thanks, just what a girl wants to hear," Tara replies back rather snarky, getting back to work, hoping the painkillers will kick in soon to stop that horrible pounding in her head, but then she suddenly stops again, clutching the trash bag in her hands, when she turns towards her older cousin. "Hey, I didn't do anything stupid, or ... say anything stupid after I got wasted, right?" 

"Define stupid?" Linc replies rather dryly, and Tara's head starts to pound even louder at the possibility that she's made a complete fool out of herself, and as if Linc can read her mind, he instantly adds. "Relax, cuz, I think the only stupid shit you said was to me, and you know I can take it. So, no harm no foul."

She feels a little bit relieved upon hearing that, but still can't help but ask. "Um, what exactly did I say?"

Linc finally stops what he's doing, and turns towards her now, to give her his undivided attention too. "When I was bringing you to bed, you called me your brother from another mother, ... well, and then you made a comment about me being the lucky one, since my mother was still alive, and yours ... wasn't."

"Oh shit," Tara exclaims, and takes a seat in the nearest lawn chair behind her. "Dead mommy came up." She adds shamefully, meeting his eyes. "I'm sorry, Linc." 

"I know." He nods. "Like I said, no harm no foul." He replies, giving her another once over, noting the weary expression on her face.

"What's going on with you?" He suddenly asks. "I mean, why did you even drink that much? Giving your old man a run for his money. Is it still about the breakup, or the break-in? Or both?"

Tara shakes her head, but regrets it immediately when the pain level raises tenfold. "No, wasn't really about Logan, but ... I guess part of it was about the break-in, and ... you know, some other stuff."

"What other stuff?" Linc asks, not missing a beat, stepping closer to her.

"Girl stuff, you know, high school girl stuff, not exactly your expertise," Tara replies with an attempt of a smile, trying to throw her cousin off of the scent of her current boy dilemma again. And before Linc can ask anything else, she quickly asks a question that's also been on her mind since she woke up and was able to think at least halfway straight again. "Speaking of high school girls, what happened to Em? She was supposed to stay the night." 

"That tall guy, Opie, he gave her a ride home, I think," Linc replied. 

"Really? Was she mad at me? I mean, did she say why she wasn't staying the night?" Tara fished for an explanation too afraid to ask out loud if she might've accidentally spilled the beans about her feelings towards Jax after all.

Linc shook his head. "No, she didn't seem mad at all, but she didn't say anything about staying the night either when she left. I think she was a little tipsy, her and Jax had a few too many, so Opie was giving both of them a ride home. That's all I know." He explained, but then asked. "Did you guys have a fight?"

"No," Tara replies, but then adds. "I mean, I don't think we did, but like you said, I was pretty drunk." 

A beat or two passes and they both start to get back to the task at hand, cleaning up the yard, before Tara stops once more. "So she was drunk, and left with Jax, who was also drunk?" She voices the question in her head out loud, trying to clarify what Linc has said, and she was too out of it herself to even attempt to hide the frown from showing on her face when Linc simply nods his head in reply, and giving her a quizzical look in return.

X

 _Several hours later_

Tara opens the front door, but before she can even get a single word out, Emma is already stepping right past her to get inside. "Jesus, I've been trying to call you, but it just keeps ringing and ringing, what is going on?"

Tara groans inwardly, quickly closing the front door again. After some food in her stomach and an afternoon nap, her hangover was finally gone, but she wasn't really in the mood for a play-by-play of Emma's night with Jax just yet. The thought of hearing about it made her stomach turn again, and the idea of having to even feign interest made her feel both angry and sad at the same time.

"Sorry, both dad and I had a headache, didn't really feel like talking." Tara tries to justify why she has the phone unplugged from the wall altogether.

"Are you mad at me?" Emma spins back around to face her friend, coming right out with the question on her mind without a moment to spare.

"What?" Tara shakes her head, feigning to have no idea what Emma is talking about. "No, why would I be mad at you?"

Emma looks back over her shoulder, checking if either Tara's dad or Linc are within earshot, but Tara gets what she's doing and speaks up again before Emma can. "They're not home, it's just me. What's up?" Tara asks, starting to pass by her towards the kitchen, and Emma is following along right behind her.

"I just figured you'd call me once you woke up, but then you didn't. And when I tried to call, you never answered. And then I thought you might be mad, because I was talking to Jax all night, or that I didn't stay over." Emma starts to explain, throwing her little purse onto the kitchen counter, before she turns back towards Tara and gladly accepts the cold soda can the brunette is offering to her out of the fridge.

"I was just really hung-over when I woke up, felt like shit, and then I was busy helping Linc clean up ... sorry." Tara tries to sound sincere in her explanation, and it was after all only partially a lie.

But Emma can see right through her, knows there's got to be more to it than that. "I know I was a shitty friend last night. After everything that happened, I was too busy flirting with Jax Teller and totally ignored you, I'm sorry." She starts to apologize. "You drank quite a bit last night, so Linc brought you to your room. And I went to check up on you later, but you were out cold. The whole point of me staying over was so we could talk, so ..." Her words die down, and she shrugs one shoulder at Tara.

"Yeah, I get it." Tara answers. "Sorry I drank so much. I was just ... I don't know, trying to get out of my head." She tries again to explain her behavior away, hoping that her friend will buy it.

Emma sighs, and looks Tara up and down for a long moment, so much so that Tara can't help but ask out loud. "What?"

"What's going on with you?" Emma speaks up, pointing out the obvious. "I mean, something's going on."

Now it was Tara's turn to sigh deeply out loud, before she took the couple steps over towards the island, bracing herself against it casually.

 _What is going on with me?_ The question seems much too complex to answer just like that, at the drop of a hat, so Tara shrugs her shoulders, not really sure what to say. She wouldn't know where to even begin to explain, so she simply answers. "I don't know. I really don't." Her voice slightly trembles, her eyes watery, because despite everything, the one person she's always confided in was Emma, is Emma, and she fears this thing with Jax could derail their friendship, at least it seems it was already beginning to do just that.

Emma is by her side within a matter of seconds, pulling Tara into a hug, slightly awkward because she's still holding the soda can in her hand while she does so. And as if she can see right through Tara, she starts. "I'm sorry I was so far away when that break-in happened, I'm sorry you were all alone, and I'm sorry we haven't really talked about that, or anything really since I got back yesterday," Emma says sincerely, and both girls wipe at their eyes, trying to keep them from tearing up and letting the emotions get the best of them. 

"Jesus Christ, look at us crying like little bitches." Emma finally scoffs when she pulls away from the embrace with her best friend. "You've gotta promise that this never leaves this room." She adds, jokingly.

Tara lets out a little laugh, wipes at her eyes, but then makes a gesture with her hand, locking her lips with an imaginary key. "Promise."

X

They settle down on Tara's bed, both have a towel wrapped around their hair, to keep the hair mask they've applied from dripping down onto their clothes.

Tara touches her fingertip to her cheek, carefully testing how much the face mask they've applied has dried yet. Wiping the smudge on the tip of her finger off on the towel on her head.

"What is this for again?" She asks, absentmindedly filing at her nails when she's looking over at her friend, who's sitting Indian-style in the middle of the bed and got a magazine in her hand, studying the front cover. A stack of more magazines strewn across the bed between them.

"Acne, and a radiant glow, I think, ... it's supposed to make us look even prettier." She replies before she adds jokingly. "Like that's even possible." 

Tara can't help but smile a little at that, but the part of the mask on her face that has already dried is pulling at her skin when she does, so the smile fades again quickly because it feels almost awkward to even talk like this.

Emma reads off a couple of things from the magazine, the latest gossip about the current celebrity heartthrobs they're swooning over, and the latest trends in fashion and make-up. The usual, carefree ritual between the best friends.

"Look at this," Emma says, turning the magazine around to show Tara the headline of the page she's on. "How pure are you? A purity test." Emma reads, rolling her eyes and then shakes her head before she adds. "Who even cares? So stupid." 

"You just say that, 'cause you wouldn't score very good on that test anymore," Tara replies rather cheekily. 

"Are you calling me easy?" Emma scoffs in faux outrage, and when Tara simply shrugs her shoulder Em's throwing one of the other magazines in Tara's direction, before she says. "We can't all hold onto our v-card forever, Tar. Sooner or later even you'll have to give it up."

They're both joking, just teasing each other, laughing out loud at their own little jabs. Moments later Em turns her attention back to the magazine, Tara focuses back on filing her nails, when she suddenly interrupts the quietness with a question of her own. "Do you think I should've slept with Logan?"

"What?" Emma looks up from the magazine, even with the obscurity of the facial mask, the confusion visible on her face. She shakes her head, dropping the magazine to the stack in the middle, giving Tara her undivided attention. "Why would you even ... I mean, do you still have feelings for him?"

"I still like him, ... I'll probably always like him. And you know, he's a really good guy. Other than ..." Tara replies, biting her lip somewhat uncertain. "I just wonder if I should've just done it, you know? If I was stupid to overthink it, to hold out like I did." 

Emma stammers for a second with her words, with her reply, until she finally gets out what she's trying to say. "That's not why you two broke up, I mean, it wouldn't have changed any of that, probably would've made it even more complicated if you had slept with him, don't you think?"

"Yeah, I know. But I mean, we were together for almost a year, and the most he's ever gotten from me was a hand-job." Tara replies.

"So?" Emma huffs back. "Nice guy or not, you don't owe him anything."

Tara shakes her head. "No, that's not what I meant."

"Well, what did you mean?" Em is quick with her comeback. "Because you've barely wanted to talk about him since the breakup, so I don't get it. Where is this coming from?"

Tara sighs, awkwardly leaning forward, pulling her knees up to her chest again, hugging her legs, before she dares to meet Emma's eyes just a few feet away from her, admitting something she's wondered about. "I just thought that if I hadn't gotten away from that guy, my first time would've been with some rapist-slash-serial-killer, you know? So, it made me think that maybe I should've already done it with someone that I like. Like Logan." ... _or Jax!_ She can feel her cheeks reddening beneath the clay mask, when the mere thought of Jax being the one comes to her mind, so she tries to push that thought away again. _Far, far away!_

"Jesus," Emma replies, a sudden somber atmosphere in the air between them as she contemplates over what Tara has just shared with her. "I didn't even think of that." 

"I know. It kind of hit me out of nowhere too, after that night, you know. All those 'w _hat-if's'._ " Tara answers, hesitating now, not sure what else to say.

There's a silence that stretches on between them, neither of them sure of what to say here, even though they're still looking at each other with unspoken questions in their eyes.

Emma eventually breaks the ice. "I mean, you and Logan are broken up now, so is that what you want your first time to be like? With Logan, like something out of a Nike commercial? Just do it? Get it over with? With someone you're not even dating anymore?"

"You're not with Bright anymore either," Tara states the obvious. "Do you regret that he was your first?" 

"No, I don't regret it, because at the time I was in love with him. And I might still be now." Emma answers. "That's not the same, like, what you are saying. For one, Logan and you are broken up. And two, liking someone and loving someone are two very different things, Tar."

"I know." Tara sighs again, letting go of her legs, stretching them out across the bed before crossing them at her ankles, and leaning back against her headboard again. "I just feel like my life's spun out of control. Everyone's treating me like this victim, and I don't like it. I swear, I'd be rich by now if I got a dollar for every time a customer at Hanna's asks me about what happened, or if I'm doing alright. Then there's my dad, who's turned his whole working schedule around to be home with me every night, losing a shit-load of money because of me. And I'm so grateful for that, yet I hate it at the same time. I just can't really explain it."

She shakes her head, hesitating for a second. "I just want a do-over, you know. Start fresh, be different, ... or something. Or at least do something I can control, something I have control over."

"So you think losing your virginity to your ex is your idea of having control?" Emma replies without having to think about it for long, with an obvious tone of sarcasm to her voice.

"I just want to move forward, and I think that would be a step in that direction. I could've died that night, so ... I don't want to be scared anymore, I want to live a little, if that makes any sense?" She searches Emma's face for any sign of understanding.

"Logan's gonna think you want to get back together. I mean, do you want to get back together with him, or do you just want to ..." She shakes her head. "Jesus, I can't believe I'm saying this to you of all people, but do you just want to use him for sex?"

For the first time since they've started this awkward conversation, Tara actually can't help herself but smirk a little at Emma's outraged expression. "I really don't know, I mean, maybe it could lead to us getting back together. Do you think he would turn me down if it's just about sex?"

"Turn you down?" Emma repeats almost laughing, then adds, smirking herself. "Of course not, I have no doubt Logan will jump at the chance to finally screw you. God knows that guy could use some outlet for all that tension."

They both let out a little laugh at that, but then Emma can't stop herself from saying. "You know, if two guys were sitting here, discussing taking advantage of their unsuspecting ex to lose their virginity, just for sex, we'd be very disgusted by them." She chuckles, and Tara does too.

"Yeah, that's very true. We would call them pigs, or ... way worse." Tara answers, shaking her head to herself when she thinks about it some more. "I guess I've got a little bit more time to sort out my feelings and really think about it, since Logan's still out of town anyways, ... or at least I think he is."

She can't help but wonder if she would actually have it in her to even go through with it, should the opportunity present itself. She would like to think she would, and maybe directing her focus elsewhere, at Logan for example, would put her thoughts about the fair-haired biker boy on the back burner for good. 

Another spell of silence falls over them once the remaining little chuckles truly subside, until Tara speaks up again. "I really still like him a lot, he can be really sweet. So it's not like I would just be giving it up to some random guy who I have no feelings for, you know?"

Emma nods her head, trying her best to be supportive now. "Then go for it, I mean, as long as you're honest with him about it, and he's cool with it, then why not? Guys have casual sex all the time, so why shouldn't we?" Tara nods in agreement, then Emma adds. "He's really good looking, so that's an obvious plus too. And we know that it wouldn't be his first time, so he probably knows what he's doing."

"Right." Tara agrees nodding again, the sore subject of Logan's prior experience suddenly making her wonder about what is expected of her. "Well, just out of curiosity, what is it exactly I'm supposed to be doing?" Tara asks, trying her best to hide the embarrassment in her voice to even have to ask that.

"Honestly, you don't have to really worry about that part. You can just sort of lie there at first." Emma replies, sounding much too nonchalant about the subject.

"Jesus, it sounds so romantic when you put it that way, Em." Tara huffs sarcastically in return.

"I hate to burst your bubble, sweetie, but it's probably not gonna be romantic, it usually never is the first time, especially if you build it up in your mind as this big thing that's gonna change your life forever, then you're gonna be disappointed, trust me." Emma gives her a knowing look that Tara quite honestly doesn't like, she's not used to being the one out of the know of things. "The lower your expectations are, the better."

A brief moment of awkward silence passes between the two friends. "Look, I know I never went into too much detail after Bright, and I did it, but we're best friends, so you're allowed to ask me things." Emma suddenly adds. 

But still, Tara can't help but shrug off the suggestion at first. "Ask you about what things?" She already knew from Em that it can hurt quite a bit the first time, that it was a little better the second time around, and that it wasn't until the third time it actually started to feel good, so Tara's expectations were undoubtedly low already.

Emma just gives her a sweet little smile, raises her eyebrows at her, because she knows Tara's question was just rhetorical, giving her a moment to actually come up with a real question after all, which ends up being. "Okay, so did you use something?"

"Tara, of course we did," Emma yells out almost outraged, misconstruing Tara's question as indecisiveness about using protection. "We used condoms. You have to! Promise me you'll make him wear a condom if you decide to do it!" She literally leans forward so she can grab Tara and jostle her along with her words of precaution. 

"Okay, okay, I promise," Tara shouts back, but then quickly lowers her voice again. "You know, let's stop talking about it." She says, pulling her legs up again, so she can lean forward and drape her arms around her knees. 

Yet after only a couple of long seconds of silence, the suggested change in subject is forgotten again, when Tara continues with her questions after all. "So, how did you, like ... decide, I mean, how did you know that you wanted to do if for sure?"

"I told Bright I wanted to wait until I was ready, you remember that, don't you? And then, that one night I totally was, and I just ... knew, so I told him, and it happened." Emma smiles sweetly again, but then a few moments later she frowns for a second, before she adds. "There is one thing you should know though, ... that after that, after we did it, having sex was like ... kind of expected. Because you can't like ... go back, you know? And when people know you've had sex, every guy after that will pretty much expect it too."

"Oh, like they aren't doing that already now?" Tara replies with heavy sarcasm in her voice. "Because everyone already just assumes that Logan and I did it." She wasn't a wallflower before, always been pretty and outgoing, but after her breakup with Logan, she'd become downright popular with the opposite sex, simply because of the assumption that she and Logan had slept with each other. 

"Exactly." Emma agrees. "They think you put out, suddenly you're on everyone's radar." She sighs, pausing for a second before she adds. "But then again, you don't want to end up like Monica Hoffer's sister either."

"What happened to Monica Hoffer's sister?" Tara asks, scrunching her eyebrows together in curiosity at the bit of small-town gossip she wasn't aware of yet. 

"She's twenty-nine years old. Never did it. Now she's petrified that she's gonna die a virgin. It's really sad." Em explains without missing a beat.

"God, being a girl just sucks, doesn't it? Nobody's giving the guys any crap for doing it, or not doing it." Tara huffs in volatile annoyance.

"I know," Emma replies, and reaches up to touch her face, feeling the mask completely dry by now, noting the tiny bits of dried clay that have fallen onto her shirt like little crumbs, from all the talking. "I think we should probably wash this off now." 

X

Emma is carefully combing out her still wet hair, wiping her hand across the steamed-up bathroom mirror to get a look at her own reflection. 

Tara is in the shower now, her turn to rinse her face and hair mask off under the hot stream, when she suddenly hears Emma's voice right outside the shower curtain, trying to be heard over the rush of water and the buzzing of the bathroom fan. "So, I forgot to mention, last night Jax said something about a party tonight at Lodi Lake Park. Wanted to know if we were going?" 

Emma pauses, waiting for Tara's reply, but when it doesn't come right off the bat, she adds. "We don't have to, if you don't feel like it. We can keep this 'girls-only' thing going for the rest of the night, if you want."

Tara shuts the water off abruptly, and reaches for the towel, wrapping it tightly around her before she pulls the curtain open enough to step out, and meets Emma's blue hopeful eyes.

She knows her blond friend wants to go for yet another chance to make time with Jax, but truthfully that is the exact reason why she doesn't really feel like going. "I don't know." She answers at first, grabbing yet another clean towel from the shelf, bending over at the waist, so she can successfully wrap it around her long wet hair turban-style.

But when she stands straight again, and catches the almost sad expression on Emma's face in the reflection of the mirror, she's already contemplating changing her mind.

Maybe she just needs to let loose, like she did last night, but maybe not quite to that extreme exactly. After a couple of drinks though it seemed much easier to ignore him and her chatting it up like they've known each other for years.

And who knows? Maybe she could meet someone new there, someone she would come to like just as much as Jax, someone her best friend didn't also have a crush on, and preferably someone not from Charming for a change. She damn sure wasn't going to meet anyone new in this one-horse-town!

"Alright, let's go." Tara finally blurts out rather enthusiastically, not just for Emma's benefit, but in an attempt to try to psych herself up too. She turns around to meet Emma face to face, tugging the towel around her in place again, when it almost comes loose. "Just one thing though."

"What's up?" Emma asks rather gleefully, undoubtedly excited for another chance to see Jax.

"Is it alright if I'm gonna party, try to have a good time and maybe get out of my head a little, you know? But I kind of need you to be my wingman, or I guess, wingwoman, so I don't overdo it, especially with the drinking, like I did last night." Tara tries to explain herself, and Emma nods in agreement, without even having to think about it.

"Sure, Tar, I won't drink at all, 'cause after last night it's probably a good idea that at least one of us stays sober," Emma replies, all too happy to play chaperone for her best friend, if it means she gets to see Jax Teller again. 

X

Jax swipes his hand down his face, his facial expression not at all matching the way he's casually leaning back against one of the large tree trunks that are scattered around the man-made sandbank, while he's looking around the campfire on the shore of Lodi Lake. 

He raises a cigarette to his lips, then his lighter, shielding the small flame from the wind with his other hand to finally light it, and then takes his first deep drag.

With the sun going down much later in June, it's just starting to get dark around here now. But he already can't even see Opie anymore from his seat in the sand. His best friend has taken off along the shoreline a little while ago, deep in conversation with a girl he'd randomly chatted up, a cute petite looking brunette, leaving Jax sitting here by himself.

Sure, he's had a couple of females that have already approached him too. Trying to flirt, offering to keep him company, despite his rather brooding disposition tonight. But he'd graciously denied them, told one after the next that he is actually waiting for someone, which is only partially a lie. He is indeed waiting for her, even though he has not the faintest idea if she is even going to show up here tonight at all.

After once more going out of his way to find the Knowles' home phone number in the phonebook earlier today, he has fruitlessly tried to call her house enough times to have memorized the number by heart already.

He's called her from home before he left for work this morning, then every time his mother stepped out of the office, he was right there on that phone, seizing the moment, trying the number yet again, and then another handful of times after he'd shown up at Opie's place before they decided to drive out here.

Opie had made the rather obvious suggestion to just stop by her house on the way, maybe even offer her a ride out here. But as eager as he was to see her again, he just didn't like the idea of her knowing about his eagerness just yet. Or maybe it was just his way of trying to fight the undeniable pull she already seems to have over him, whether she was aware of it or not.

Truth be told, he had it bad for Tara Knowles. Really, really fucking bad, that much has become crystal clear, even to him, the moment he realized that he found her yearbook picture and a mental image of her more arousing than the stacks of playboy and penthouse magazines, and ultimately ended up jacking off with only her on his mind instead. 

But now, as he sits here all by himself, he wants to kick himself for not listening to Opie earlier. He should've just stopped by her house, should've looked past the way she had downright ignored him the night before, swallowed his damn pride, and invited her to tag along with Ope and him. Because if he'd done that, he wouldn't be sitting here all alone now, like some chain-smoking dumbass, constantly letting his eyes roam and linger on every approaching female figure way off in the distance, in hopes that it turns out to be her.

Yeah, showing up at her house and asking her face to face, would've been the most logical thing to do, especially considering how he feels about her, and yet, nothing seems to come natural or logical to him anymore since Tara's somehow managed to insert herself into his thoughts of every minute of every goddamn day.

Last night though, after he got home and had stumbled into his bed with her on his mind, it has finally dawned on him, and he's come to realize that Tara Knowles didn't really fit in with any of the other girls he's encountered in the past, she was different.

There were girls like her friend Emma, hot, sweet, bubbly, who would be overly flirtatious, not leaving a whole lot of doubt about wanting to get closer to him.

Then there were the girls which were even more direct, usually the rich and spoiled brat type, with major daddy issues, that would love nothing more than to parade him, - the white trash biker with the criminal filled family tree -, around their old man, just to royally piss them off.

And then there were the girls like his ex-girlfriend Amy, almost seeming sweet and innocent, at least at first, who'd start out playing hard to get for a little while, but before long the tables would turn, she'd be calling him, or showing up at T-M out of the blue, following him around like a lost little puppy.

And at first he'd believed Tara to be more like the latter, like Amy, just being coy, playing shy, whatever, but that she'd show more interest once he started to show some in her. Which he has already done, by showing up at her house with the damn spare key, making nice with her old man, then chatting her up in the back alley of Hanna's diner, and of course taking her dad up on the invite to the barbeque just yesterday, and last but not least, he's tried to call her today for what felt like a hundred times, but to no avail.

But last night, regardless of how many times he looked her way, tried to meet her eyes, tried to approach her, strike up a conversation, or find an in through her best friend Emma, Tara either vanished out of sight, or was too busy chatting with other people to even acknowledge his presence at all.

So before he even really had a chance to talk to her last night, she'd been three sheets to the wind, hardly able to follow anything he would've said to her at that point, before Linc was helping her back to her bedroom to sleep it off. 

He scans the shoreline once more, he even squints, trying to better focus at the shadowy figures way off in the distance, but Opie's nowhere to be seen. Then his eyes repeatedly flicker back to the heavily wooded tree line again, waiting and hoping the girl of his dreams would finally make her entrance, but still no such luck.

Clearly annoyed and impatient, he stubs his cigarette out in the sand, quickly lights up another one again, before he scrambles to his feet. With his cigarette hanging loosely from the side of his lips, he uses both hands to wipe the sand off of his backside, off of his jeans, before he starts to make his way over to the new keg, that someone has finally brought over and started up. 

And just as it's his turn in line, and he reaches for the little hose and begins to fill up a plastic cup, Tara finally steps out of the woods that lead back to the dirt road where everyone's parked their vehicle at, and into his direct line of view.

But in the split second that he saw her, the same instant that she saw him, she's already turned back around on the spot, literally walking into the other direction again, away from him. _What the fuck is going on?_

"Shit." Jax curses, mumbling under his breath, cigarette still hanging from the corner of his mouth and stops what he's doing at once, leaving the barely filled cup sitting on one of the tables and starts heading after her.

He quickens his steps to almost a jog to catch up with her, taking several long drags from his cigarette along the way, before he flicks the remaining stump into the sandy ground a few feet ahead of him, stepping it out, extinguishing the last remaining glimmer on his continued pursuit of the brunette beauty, who was not just occupying his daydreams, but his dreams at night as well. 

"Tara ... hey, Tara." He shouts after her, once he knows he's close enough for her to actually hear him over the music that's blaring from the speakers over by the shoreline behind him.

To his relief, she actually stops dead in her tracks upon hearing him call out her name, slowly turning around towards him again, just in time for him to have reached her side and unable to keep the smile from his face, now that she's finally here with him.

"Hi." He huffs, just a tiny bit out of breath, not used to chasing after someone while finishing off a cigarette, like he just did.

"Hi," Tara replies, smiling shyly, her voice sounding sweet like honey, as she's blinking her long lashes innocently up at him. 

But Jax isn't fooled in the least, everything that just happened comes back to him and his own smile fades again, replaced by a confused expression instead, when he throws his thumb up over his shoulder, pointing it back in the direction where he had been, and where she'd seen him and practically fled the scene. "Did you just ..." He starts, but then pauses, trying to think of the right words that will get straight to the point, yet will hopefully not spook her into running away from him yet again. In the end, the most direct approach wins out. "Did I do something, I mean, are you avoiding me or something? Because it looked like you took off when you saw me standing over there by the keg."

Tara feels so embarrassed, having been caught in the act by him like this, and she almost wishes the sandy ground beneath her would open up and swallow her whole, just so she could avoid this awkward confrontation with him.

She looks up at him in obvious embarrassment, can feel her cheeks blushing, but surely the orange glow from the bonfires along the beach camouflages everything enough so he won't even notice, or at least so she hopes.

Tara's always been quick to think on her feet, so she nervously folds her arms in front of herself, and she starts to admit out loud. "You're right, I did." She says, but before Jax can even ask _'Why'_ , she's already trying to come up with a reasonable explanation. "I ran ... because I got very drunk last night, and to be perfectly honest, I can't really remember if I said, or did anything embarrassing. So when I saw you standing over there, I guess I panicked a little, you know?" She gives him yet another awkward little smile before she adds. "Sorry." 

She tries so hard to read the expression on his face, wondering if he'll buy into her little innocent act or call her out on her bullshit, but when he returns her smile with a genuine one of his own, relief washes over her instantly. "Don't sweat it, I think your cousin got you out of there just in time before anything embarrassing happened. We've all been there, darlin', no reason to run."

Then he sighs, looking over his shoulder at the increasing crowd of teenagers gathering, and some even dancing around the bonfires, before his eyes meet hers again. "Wanna get out of here?"

Tara's taken back, she hasn't expected him to suggest something like that, and she can't help but let her eyes roam across the crowd behind him, hoping and wishing she'd see someone, anyone, she could use as an excuse to get herself out of this predicament. But of course, just her luck, there's not a single person she would call a close friend, so she stammers her words when she says. "Um, actually, I was waiting for Emma."

Jax instantly starts looking around for her, when he asks. "Where is she?"

 _Shit!_ "She ran into her ex right when we got here ..." Tara nods back towards the woods to her right, where she'd come from. "... back where we were parking, so ..." The words die down, but she hopes it's enough to derail his idea.

"Is her ex gonna cause trouble? Do you want me to come with you, check up on her and him?" Jax offers, and under normal circumstances she'd take him up on his offer, find Emma, and derail his plans to make time with her alone. 

But Tara's pretty damn sure Emma and Bright have climbed happily into the back seat of his Chevy together, and her best friend would not appreciate it one little bit if they got interrupted by her, with Jax Teller tagging along to bear witness to it all.

"Um, no, he's a nice guy, I think they're fine, I think she's fine." Tara sort of stammers out the words, hoping they make sense.

"Well, I don't see her anywhere." He replies, scanning the crowd one more time before turning his attention solely back to Tara. "But either way, we're not going very far." He nods in the wooded area behind her. "Just somewhere where we can actually talk, where it isn't so damn noisy. What do you say?" He smiles sweetly back at her, his usually light blue eyes seem much darker out here staring back at her now, beckoning her to go along.

Still though, a sense of panic rushes through her at the thought of being alone with him, her heart beating out of her chest. On one hand the last thing she wants to do is hurt Emma's feelings, but on the other hand, her blond, blue-eyed friend was very likely going at it with one of her exes in a backseat somewhere, so what now? She honestly finds herself fresh out of ideas to get out of this situation with him. 

Jax on the other hand mistakes her hesitance for fear instead, suddenly remembering and acknowledging the nightmare she's recently gone through. "Shit, I'm sorry." He starts apologizing, taking Tara by surprise yet again. "I wasn't even thinking that you might not feel comfortable with a walk through the woods, considering what happened."

 _Fuck being a victim, fuck being scared, fuck Michael Dunley!_

With anyone else she might've actually felt scared to take a stroll through the forest late at night, but Jax was the one who'd saved her that night. He, along with Opie, were quite literally the two teenage boys she'd entrust her life with at the moment, so she can't stand the thought that Jax would even think she might be scared of him.

"No. I'm fine." She quickly shakes her head at him, at what he was implying. "You saved my life that night. So I'm not scared, ... well, at least not of you." She adds the last few words with a shy little smile on her lips, and is met in return with a little smirk from Jax.

"Well, then." He says, nodding towards the forest ahead of him, and when she turns around and starts taking the first slow steps, he casually drapes his arm around her shoulder and falls in step right beside her.

Tara can feel a warmth spread throughout her at his touch, at the sheer proximity of his body walking right next to hers, and she wants to shake her head, wants to shake the ideas of him and her right back out of her mind. _Emma, Emma, Emma ... she just has to focus on Emma!_

Suddenly something dawns on her, and she glances up at him as they walk further away from the crowd. "Is Opie here?" Maybe there was still a chance they'd get interrupted by his best friend, if not by hers.

"Yeah, he's here." Jax nods, then adds, without falling out of step. "He took off with some chick he just met, they're around here somewhere."

"Oh, really?" Tara feigns interest, anything to distract herself from what she was feeling. "What's her name? Maybe I know her."

"Hmmm." Jax hums for a long second, trying to recall the name of the little brunette. "I think she said her name was Dana ... or maybe it was Donna? I'm not sure."

X

Author's Note: What do you all think of this chapter? Please leave me a few words if you can. Thank you. 


	7. Oh, he's so dead!

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

"I don't think I know anyone named Dana or Donna." Tara replies, still trying to find something to occupy her mind with, something other to think about than the way he smells so intoxicatingly good, the sudden butterflies in her stomach, or that he has his arm around her and is leading her away from the party, to a more secluded spot to _'talk'_. "Does she go to Charming High?" She adds, still trying to prolong this conversation.

"Naw, I don't think so," Jax replies, shrugging his shoulders along with his words. "I'm not sure where she's from?" 

They don't walk very much further once they're past the tree line, coming to a stop near a small rock formation amongst the vegetation and trees surrounding them, and Tara can't help the feeling that Jax has had this particular spot in mind all along.

Bringing the question to pop up in her head, just how many girls he's brought to this spot out here before her? But asking him that out loud would imply way more than she was willing to admit even to herself, so she bites her tongue instead, and vows that she won't let this turn into something like that. Because even if it wasn't for Emma and her feelings, she has no interest in being just another notch on his belt.

Jax glances back over his shoulder, past the trees, back at the party that's just now really starting since more alcohol has arrived, before he turns his attention quickly back to Tara right beside him. "This alright?" He asks her, gesturing to the almost flat rock, easily big enough for three or four people to sit on, strangely resembling something like an oversized couch made of stone, like you would see on _'the Flintstones'_ , sans the armrests.

"Yeah, sure." Tara nods, ducks out from under his arm, and moves to climb up and sit.

"Wait a sec. Lemme clean that up for ya'." Jax says, stepping in her way and swipes both his hands in long strokes across the surface repeatedly, wiping away any loose dirt and leaves, before he holds his hand out for her to take, to make it easier for her to climb up to take a seat.

 _Oh, he's good!_

"Thanks," Tara replies shyly, can't help herself but smile, undoubtedly flattered by the sweet gesture, and takes his offered hand, trying to ignore the spark of electricity that shoots through her when they touch, and wordlessly climbs atop. 

She can practically feel his eyes traveling up the length of her body before she finally turns and sits, kicking her legs to scoot back against the other rocks, that sort of serve as a backrest, although a more uneven one than the slab they're actually using as a seat. 

Jax easily climbs up and settles in the spot right beside her, leaning back too, and letting out a rather content sounding little sigh. However, that sigh is utterly faked and staged, because even though he's happy she's finally here, and alone with him at that, he's suddenly feeling fucking nervous as hell.

He hurriedly pulls his pack of cigarettes from his pocket, hoping that yet another one might do the trick and calm him again, holding it out to her first, but when she smiles yet shakes her head _'no'_ declining, he doesn't waste another second, fishing one out for himself and quickly lights it up.

From their position they have a pretty good view of the bonfires and the party, even though they themselves are shrouded by the shadows the foliage and trees around them provide, hidden away from prying eyes in the darkness of the night ... well, at least from afar.

They can still hear the music, along with the general buzzing of conversations from the crowd though, but it isn't loud anymore, and would be easily completely drowned out if he or she were to actually start talking. 

Jax exhales the smoke out to the side of his mouth, away from her, and stares off at the party a distance away from them, just like she is doing right next to him. He's seriously trying to think of something to say, but fuck, ... her presence alone is so goddamn distracting.

That little white tank-top barely conceals the black bikini top she's wearing beneath, and coupled with these daisy duke type cutoffs, has him thinking all sorts of impure thoughts, and making his fingers itch to explore all the smooth looking skin she's exposing tonight.

He wishes he knew what the hell the matter is with him, or more importantly how to stop it, and get his head on straight again. He's been around hot chicks more times than he can count, yet none have ever affected him like this. What the hell is it about her that turns him into such a goddamn love-struck idiot, unable to even form a fucking coherent thought? 

He can't remember ever feeling this dumbstruck or flustered around any girl before, let alone one he's practically known his whole life. Well, _known_ was probably too strong a word.

He has sort of known her when they were much younger, remembers playing with her in elementary school, but strangely, what he mostly remembers about her from back then, was her missing almost a week of school when her mom had died.

Then they've eventually moved on to Junior High, and playing wasn't really on the agenda anymore, they've each joined their own little cliques, and ever since, he's just known-of-her, curiously watched her from afar at school, at parties, at after-school-functions, or when he's seen her randomly around Charming, with her dad or her friends.

Tara is a part of her own group of friends, and he has his, and they simply didn't really cross paths, mostly because they didn't really know each other, and assumed they're not having much in common. Last night at her house was sort of the first exemption to that, one he wasn't sure would be repeated anytime soon, unless forced by either him or her, somehow.

And it suddenly dawns on him then, that it's really just some sort of vicious cycle; they don't know each other because they never talked, and they never talk because they didn't know each other.

It's the push he needs to finally snap himself out of his stupor, flicking the ash off of the end of his cigarette, before he glances over at her, because that is what he wants now.

It's suddenly no longer just about getting his hands on her, he wants to get to know her. Wants to know what's going on in that pretty little head of hers. "We didn't really get to talk last night. How have you been?"

Tara glances at him, meeting his eyes, and even manages to smile back at him, ignoring the little jab about not talking to him last night. "I'm good." She nods, even smiles a little more, hoping it will bring more emphasis to her words. "Everything's really good. You?" Her heart is beating out of her chest though, as she's fighting her way through the lie. _Nothing is good, nothing is good at all!_

 _Well, shit!_ He hasn't expected this, and knows that the polite thing would be to simply accept her answer at face value, and reply to her with a similar meaningless platitude, but there is something about her facial expression that's off, in fact, there's something in her eyes that's way, way off, and he finds himself unable to ignore it now that he's realized it.

As a matter of fact, he almost wants to kick himself now that he hasn't noticed it much sooner, like earlier, when she has tried to run off. Now it all kind of starts to make sense, that expression on her face, coupled with what she'd revealed to him about a week ago, about not being able to finish that book, and the amount of alcohol she drank just last night alone, well, all of those things considered, it has him not buying her answer at all, not for a minute, not even a little.

He studies her face for just a tad bit too long for her comfort, as if that could help him read more into her thoughts, figure out what's really on her mind, and how to approach this.

And she fakes yet another smile, but against her own better judgment, she can't stop herself from asking out loud what that look he's giving her is about. "What? What's that look for?" Oblivious to the fact that he's catching on to her, she even lets out a little chuckle, but it's completely mirthless, no actual humor in it, no matter how hard she tries to pretend and make it sound real, it just doesn't.

He takes in a breath, letting it slowly escape through his nostrils, when he raises his eyebrows at her, keeps watching her with intent scrutiny, his voice firm, yet sincere and edged with genuine concern. "You know you don't have to bullshit me, right? I mean, if you need someone to talk to, ... you can talk to me. I'm here."

She's still got that same pretend smile on her face, no longer just trying to hide her true feeling behind it, but also trying to hide the fact that she's taken aback by this sudden serious vibe surrounding them now. She wishes she could just take three steps back, and talk about that Dana girl and Opie some more instead.

But it's too late for that, she hasn't seen this coming at all, and wants to brush off his words of concern for her, like she's been doing with everyone else around her. Wants to deny him the truth, turn back time, and repeat her first answer a little more convincingly. But the look in his eyes is so intense and genuine, that she literally has to look away, avert her eyes from his, fighting tears from forming out of nowhere, when her fake smile finally crumbles under the weight of it all. 

And the worst part is, that this isn't about her feelings for him anymore, or even Emma's feelings for him either, ... this is something altogether different, and way more serious and heart wrenching than just the maneuvering around a mutual crush between friends.

She knows that some things just don't stay hidden in a place the size of Charming, that people like to talk and gossip, but it was usually just surface stuff, an abridged version of events, not really getting down to the nitty-gritty. They all just want to throw their two cents in, from her nosy next-door neighbors, the random lady at the grocery store, right down to her customer's at the damn diner that she works at, all of them pushy and annoying, sure, but she can handle it because nobody really ever digs too deep.

And she'd thought that she'd convincingly fooled them all, hidden the real drama, or rather trauma away inside her head, behind fake smiles, friendly nods of agreement and meaningless small talk.

She was under the assumption that nobody is paying close enough attention to what she is doing, or saying, or how she is acting. Didn't think anyone would care enough to read between the lines, look behind the facade, because why would they bother? But as it turns out she isn't as convincing or invisible as she thought she was, at least apparently not to Jackson Teller! _Who would've thunk it?_

Jax reaches over, tips her chin back up, lifting her face with the tips of his fingers so she'll meet his eyes. "It's alright, you know, to not be alright after everything that happened. I was there, so ... I know that night was scary as fuck." He points to himself with his other hand, and adds. "I was scared, and I wasn't who that psycho was after."

She knows he's just trying to help, doesn't mean no harm by what he's saying, the opposite really, but it doesn't help her in the least, instead it breaks something open she hasn't allowed herself to feel until now, and now it hurts.

Jax swallows away the lump that has formed in his own throat now, when he sees her face fall, her chin beginning to quiver. Her tank top, short shorts, and bare skin, all that superficial shit is instantly forgotten, when all he can stare at are her eyes, and the tears that are forming in them now. _Oh shit, he didn't mean to make her cry!_

Without a second to spare, he grinds the rest of his smoke out against the rock right beside him, flicks it away from them, and then quickly drapes his arm around her shoulder, pulling her into his side. 

But his comforting embrace is actually what causes the tears to fall now, his touch has somehow opened the floodgates, and so she cries, her body shaking a little with each sob that escapes her, resting her head against his shoulder, while he tries his best to soothe her, even though he's not really sure how to go about doing that exactly. 

He works at a garage, his day to day interactions mostly consist of rough bikers and burly mechanics. Well, there is his mother, the only constant female presence in his life, but she's not the type to wear her heart on her sleeve, instead she prefers to hide her feelings behind angry outbursts, sarcastic one-liners, or a clever combination of both. She's never been much of the crying-on-your-shoulder type, with maybe the only exception being when his little brother and his father had died, at least as far as he can remember.

It is no secret that his good looks and charm have always made him popular with some girls. He flirts, he dates, he makes-out, and some of them even turned into steady girlfriends for a while, but none of those girls have ever broken down crying in his arms before, because none of them have ever been through the shit Tara's been through. 

So what the hell does he know about something like this? What is he supposed to say or do to make her feel better, make her stop crying? Or is he supposed to encourage her instead, tell her to let it all out?

He doesn't have the faintest idea, because at sixteen years of age, he can honestly say he's only ever held a crying girl in his arms once before tonight, coincidently it just so happens to be the same girl, less than two weeks ago, on the night of the break-in after they'd realized her keys were missing.

He's relying solely on his gut feeling when he grabs her, lifting her over his thigh, so she can sit sideways between his open legs, right in front of him now, just so he can pull her even closer into his chest. And with her face hidden beneath his chin, in the crook of his neck, she's so close that he can feel the wetness of her tears falling against his skin.

One strong arm is firmly holding her against him while he's continuing to run his other hand down her long brown hair, mimicking something he remembers his mother used to do to Tommy and him, back when they were still little and upset about something.

He goes on whispering to her, universal words of reassurance, things like _"It's okay."_ or _"It'll be alright."_ , simply because he's not really sure what else to say or do. But he must be doing something right, judging by the way she's starting to calm down and relax against him now, wrapping her arms around him, holding onto him, and it strangely warms his heart, sort of comforting him in return.

Then he instantly wonders though, if he should be feeling bad for the way this is making him feel, because he obviously knows that it's fucked up to get any sort of enjoyment out of her being distraught. It's not like it's her misery that he's actually enjoying, it's not like that at all, he realizes that her tears mean pain, and the last thing he wants is for her to be in pain of any kind. He'd take all her pain away in a heartbeat, take it on as his own if he only could.

And it isn't about sex either, he's not getting hard or off on the fact that she's clearly hurting, but still, he can't change the way he likes that she's allowing him to hold her in his arms like this, or the way she's holding onto him now too.

Despite the underlying guilt he's feeling about all of it, he suddenly realizes that he just likes the thought of someone needing him like that, or if he is being completely honest with himself, he specifically likes the idea of someone like Tara Knowles possibly needing someone like him!

Tara startles him out of his thoughts when she suddenly speaks up. "I'm actually glad he's dead." She admits out loud, but sniffles one last time. "Does that make me a bad person?" She asks, when the tears have finally stopped flowing again. 

Her words take Jax by surprise, but he's quick to answer, doesn't even have to think about it, his voice firm and unwavering, shaking his head when he says. "No, it doesn't, Tara. He was the bad person." He lets out a heavy sigh when he lets her question sink in a little more, can't help himself from placing a kiss against the top of her head, against her hair, before adding. "He deserves what happened to him, trust me, you've got nothing to feel bad about."

His words are followed with a long stretch of silence from both of them, while he continues to hold her, continues to comfort her, even though she seems to be no longer crying.

But then Tara's suddenly pulling away, bracing herself with her hand against his chest, trying to sit back up again, while she's also trying to ignore the feel of his lean muscles beneath the palm of her hand. Jax reluctantly lets go of her.

Then she wipes at her face, sort of hiding from him behind her hands, before she moves back to the seat beside him, instead of right in front of him. She can feel her cheeks flaming now, for a second feeling tongue-tied, incredibly embarrassed to have fallen apart like this in front him, she feels like such an idiot.

"I'm sorry." She suddenly huffs, afraid to meet his eyes, still straightening herself out, tucking on her clothes, wiping her fingers under her eyes some more, slightly horrified at what she might look like right now after all that crying. "God, I'm so embarrassed, I can't believe I did that, ... I feel so stupid." She adds, brushing her hair out of her face.

Jax can't take his eyes off of her, because even now she's so fucking pretty. He leans forward, bends his outstretched legs at the knees, so he can drape his arms casually over them, because he's already missing having her to hold onto.

And he can see how flustered she is, can't stand the thought that she regrets letting him close, so he quickly replies. "Hey, it's all good. No reason to feel stupid. If you need a shoulder to cry on, I'm your guy. Alright?" He directs a smile at her then, his eyes sparkling sweetly, and when she finally dares to look over at him, she can see that he really means it, that he's being genuinely okay with what has happened, and she nods her head at him in reply, returning his smile with one of her own. "Yeah, okay."

There's a long awkward silence as they keep looking at each other, but then something shifts, strangely changes, ... in the air, between them, or maybe both. You can feel it, like something calm has settled over them, evaporating all this unnecessary tension that's been hanging between them all night.

Jax sits back up, leaning back against the rock behind them, pulls another cigarette out, and quickly lights it. And Tara sort of follows suit, leaning back again too, trying to relax, making herself comfortable again, as much as you can be comfortable sitting on a sofa made of stone.

He is the one that finally breaks the ice, coming right out with what's still on his mind when he says. "You wanna talk about it?" And it's not just a meaningless offer, he's genuinely invested now, and wants to know what she's been holding in that has caused all those tears to suddenly bubble up to the surface.

At that, Tara gives him a bewildered look, like he has just said something outrageous, but when she doesn't reply right away, he adds. "I'm serious. I'm a pretty damn good listener." He actually grins. "And a hell of a lot cheaper than a shrink."

She can't help it, smirks now too, when she catches the expression on his face, hears the teasing and playful tone in his voice, so she replies teasingly herself. "Oh, really? And here I thought you were just another pretty face, Teller."

He has just flicked some ash off the end of his smoke, was just about to bring the cigarette back to his lips, but freezes the movement of his hand with some dramatic flair in mid-air, staring at her instead, and raises his eyebrows to new heights when he says. "Did I hear that right, Knowles? Did you just call me pretty?" 

Tara shakes her head, trying to suppress the giggle that's rising in her throat, and ignore the little laugh that's coming from him when he sees her face. She's not really sure how to respond to that, at least not in a way that won't land her in hot water with Emma, so she quite literally keeps her mouth shut.

Nevertheless, Jax's face grows serious again just moments later, when he takes a drag from his cigarette, before he says. "Seriously though, what's going on?"

Their eyes meet, and he can see the hesitance in hers reflecting back at him, when she replies. "It's personal stuff. Embarrassing stuff."

"I can keep a secret, I mean, who the hell would I tell anyway?" He throws back at her rhetorically, but Tara gives him a very pointed look, cocking her head to the side, her eyebrows raised now, and the meaning crystal clear, so he adds. "If you're asking me not to, then I won't tell anyone, including Ope ..." He gestures to her and him, and adds. "... about any of this." 

Then he pulls the collar of his t-shirt away, as if he's trying to get a look at it without taking the whole shirt off, when he says. "Besides, pretty sure you've already left some snot on my shirt from all that crying, so really, ... how much more embarrassing can this possibly get for you at this point?"

Tara fakes outrage for just a second, before they both start laughing again, and she reaches over, running her hand over his shirt. "That is so not true, I did not get any snot on you."

Finally, the last of the laughter dies down, and Tara pushes her hair back, letting out a heavy sigh, looking up towards the sky, even though she can't see the moon from here, because the treetops above them are touching, forming a canopy of sorts, made entirely of branches and leaves.

She shakes her head to herself for a second, thinking that she must be crazy for even considering spilling her guts to some guy she barely knows, but deep down she knows she's already made up her mind. She's not sure how, but he's managed to convince her.

And before she even knows what she's doing, she's already doing it, she's talking. A little awkward at first, but it seems to get easier with every word that's spilling from her lips.

She's telling him about her fears of being alone at home, how she can't sleep until her dad gets home, feeling scared of her own shadow, and how she feels she can't tell her dad or Linc any of this, because they both need to work, can't stay home with her forever, etcetera, etcetera.

Suddenly the conversation just comes so easily, so unforced. Words just jumbling out, and neither of them is second-guessing every word either, when they begin to talk about everything and anything else. About that night, about what everyone in Charming's been saying, about the other victims that weren't as lucky as her, and so on. 

It's strange to feel like this, but it seems so natural, like they've known each other their whole lives, and have done this many times before. Despite everything, they even find themselves laughing out loud at times, mostly due to Jax, trying his best to lighten the mood every chance he sees, pressing his luck with a witty or sarcastic remark to take some of the sting out of the rather depressing subject. Loving the way it seems to take the pain away, out of her eyes, even if just for a short moment. It makes it all worth it.

Then Tara suddenly catches sight of Emma with Bright at the party. They're a little ways away, but she recognizes them without a doubt, and for the first time she dares a glance down at her wristwatch to check the time. "Shit" She curses, but instantly thinks that that can't possibly be the right time. Her watch must be busted.

With a flash of panic in her eyes, she reaches for Jax's arm, to get a look at his watch, before she meets his eyes. "Is it really this late? Have we been talking for over two hours?"

Jax glances at the time, and nods. "Yeah. Why? You've got a curfew or something?"

"No, it's not that." She shakes her head, but starts scooting to the edge already, so she can slip off, and Jax follows, while she further explains. "I'm spending the night at Em's, and she's probably wondering where the hell I am, where I've been."

"Right." Jax acknowledges her concern, and falls into step right beside her, even though he really doesn't want to leave this place, or end this alone time they got to share out here away from everyone.

He's really got no desire to head back to the party at all, but he will, since that seems to be where she's headed. Come to think of it, he should probably check up on Opie too.

But just before they step through the tree line, where they can be seen by everyone else, Jax excuses himself to stay behind. "I'll catch up with you in a sec, gotta take a leak."

"Okay," Tara replies, honestly a little relieved that Emma won't see her emerge side by side with Jax, and keeps on walking without looking back, while Jax stops and turns away from her. 

But her relief doesn't last long at all, when Emma storms in her direction as soon as she comes into view. And judging from the looks of it, the expression on Emma's face, she's not amused at all. "What the hell happened? I've been looking everywhere for you, where have you been?" She sounds more like an outraged mother than her best friend. 

Tara gulps, a sudden rush of guilt coming over her, when she's trying to find a way to explain that she's been alone with Jax this whole time, without it sounding as bad as it does inside her head.

"Sorry." She mutters, and starts with. "I lost track of time." She's being deliberately cryptic to buy herself another second to think on how to best word this, but instead she finds herself wondering why it is so much easier for her to talk to Jax, than it is right now explaining something completely innocent to her best friend.

"Lost track of time how?" Emma asks, clearly ticked off, but also confused, and she is quite literally opening her mouth to add something else, to press her for more details, when her eyes shift away from Tara's guilty looking face and suddenly are focused on something behind her brunette friend instead.

It's all happening so fast, but there behind Tara, stepping out from between the same trees where Tara has just come from, is none other than Jackson Teller. And in that split second Emma still catches a last glimpse of him with his hand zipping up his fly, before he quickly drops his arm back to his side as he's coming closer towards them.

Emma looks back at Tara, speechless, and hurt, but then suddenly seething, even as Bright appears right beside her, the same instance Jax caught up with Tara too.

Jax catches Tara off guard when he drapes his arm casually around her shoulder again, smiling sweetly down at her, before he looks back at the blonde and nods at her in greeting. "Hey, Emily. How are you?"

 _Emily? Shit, ... adding salt to the wound!_ Tara can't help but bite her lip.

Emma doesn't reply though, as a matter of fact, she doesn't even look at him right now, she's too pissed at Tara. "I need to talk to you. Alone." She hisses, then grabs Tara a little roughly by the arm, pulling her along with her, out of earshot from the guys, and everyone else around them.

Jax watches after the two girls for just a second before he turns towards Bright, who he knows from school, and nods at him in greeting. "Hey, man." 

"What's up?" Bright replies, nodding back, his eyes on the girls as well, watching them have some kind of argument.

Jax puts a cigarette to his lips, shielding the flame of his lighter with his hands again when he lights it, before he asks, nodding towards the girls. "Any idea what that's about?"

Bright shakes his head. "No clue." He gives Jax a pointed look, raising just one eyebrow in a cartoonish way. "Chicks, man!"

Jax nods in agreement, before he pries his eyes away from Tara for just a moment, and turns so he can let his eyes scan the rest of the shore and party, before looking back at Bright again. "You seen Ope around?"

Bright looks over his shoulder, scanning the crowd behind them for a moment as well, before he replies. "No, I haven't. He's here?"

"He was," Jax replies, letting his eyes roam over the crowd again, because his best friend's usually pretty easy to spot, the way he towers over most, but he's still nowhere to be found. 

Just then, a short burst of a police siren can be heard, followed by something being said over the speaker, when a cop car pulls up out of nowhere near the shore, drawing everyone's attention at once.

Jax and Bright both turn towards the noise, some kids are already running off, some yelling "Cops" in warning, when Jax's eyes land back on Tara. He quickly drops the cigarette he has just lit, and starts running towards her, but she's too caught up in her fight with Emma that she hasn't even noticed the panic that's beginning to break out.

"Hey, babe!" He yells before he even reaches her, causing both the girls to turn their attention towards him now, wondering who he's calling 'Babe', looking back at him slightly puzzled for a split second, before they see what is starting to unfold behind him.

"We gotta go." Jax huffs, but doesn't even completely stop, just slows down enough to grab Tara firmly by the hand and starts pulling her along with him, back to the dirt road in the woods, where everyone's parked at.

Tara clings to Jax's hand, trying to keep up with him, but he's wearing sneakers, while she's in flip-flops and is clearly at a disadvantage here.

She glances back over her shoulder for just a split second, but it's long enough to catch Emma's eyes one last time, still full of anger and hurt directed at her, before the blond, blue-eyed girl disappears out of sight with Bright instead. 

They've had the occasional fight before. It's what best friends do, they fight sometimes, but tonight was very different. Both have spewed some very hurtful things at each other just moments ago, and for the first time in a long time, Tara's not sure if they can come back from this.

"That son of a bitch." Jax curses, bringing Tara out of her thoughts about Emma when he finally slows down, and turns towards her. There's outrage in his voice when he says. "Opie took the truck. Unbelievable, that son of a bitch just left me, took the goddamn truck." He looks around for a second in a panic, trying to think of how to get out of here now, or if he sees anyone they can catch a ride with, mumbling under his breath, the sentiment undoubtedly directed towards Opie. "Oh, he's so dead!"

She might've just lost her best friend, apparently Jax lost his ride, and truthfully she's not really sure why they're even running from the cops, but Tara can't help the little smirk that appears on her face despite it all, because he's just too damn cute when he looks this pissed off. 

She decides to put an end to his misery when she says, pointing further down the road. "My car is right over there. I can take you home."

X

Author's Note: Finally, the new chapter is done. Love it? Hate it? Leave me a few words, please. I can't wait to hear what you think. Thanks for reading!


	8. Emma is not my sidekick

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

Tara tugs on Jax's hand to get him to follow along to her car now, but mid-way there, she reluctantly lets go of him, to dig into the pockets of her jean shorts to find and retrieve her keys instead.

She steps up to the driver's side of the Cutlass, quickly unlocks the car, climbs inside and reaches across to the passenger door to pull the lever to let him in.

Tara starts the car the same instant when Jax pulls the door all the way open, but instead of climbing in, he leans down and glances at her in obvious surprise, his face illuminated by what little moonlight filters through the trees, and the headlights from all the other car starting up all around them.

He finally speaks up just when the engine roars to life. "This is your car?" He isn't entirely sure what he'd expected her to be driving, ... maybe some Herbie-looking Volkswagen Beetle, or even some beat up piece of shit Chevy Nova like the one he owns, but definitely not this black on black nearly pristine-looking '67 Oldsmobile Cutlass. 

Tara makes a gesture with her hand for him to get in. "C'mon, get in." So he finally slips in and settles in the seat beside her, closing the door when she answers him. "I wish it was mine, but it's not, it's my dad's."

She quickly turns the car around on the narrow dirt road, which isn't easy with everyone else doing the same, trying to leave at the same time, but at last she merges onto the dirt road, following the line of cars out of here, slowly moving, bumper to bumper, just a trail of red rear lights in the darkness ahead of them.

She tries her best not to think back on her fight with Emma from just moments ago, but can't help hearing some of her best friend's ugly words, along with her own, play out again in her head.

 _'I can't believe you would do this to me, Tar? You know how much I like him!_

 _Em, just let me explain. We were just ... -_

 _So all that talk earlier, about wanting to live your life, about wanting to do it for the first time with someone you like, were you talking about him the whole time? Do you like him?_

 _No, of course not ... I mean, I do ... I like him, but I wasn't talking about him._

 _Did you sleep with him? Or did you just suck his dick?_

 _Jesus Christ, Em, what the hell is wrong with you? I can't believe you would even ask me that._

 _Don't even try to act all offended, I saw him close his pants back up with my own goddamn eyes._

 _Nothing happened, we were just talking, Emma. What you saw was -_

 _Jax Teller and you just talked? In the woods, alone, for two fucking hours? Bullshit! ... You know if you did this, you're just another notch on his belt, right?_

 _You don't know what you're talking about. He's not even like that._

 _He's exactly like that. He's got a reputation, some random blowjob in the woods means nothing to him! So if you blew him, I hope you know you also blew your chance of it being anything more than that too!_

 _You know who else has a reputation, Em? You do, and half the shit they say about you isn't true either, ... even though you're acting pretty fucking nuts right now, so maybe some of it is true after all. And for the hundredth time, nothing happened, Em! I swear!_

 _You wanna talk reputation, Tara, really? Because let me tell you something, you've got one too. And let's not forget that I know you better than most, so you can keep on going around and play the victim-card, pour-little-me-that-almost-got-raped, ... I know that the sweet and innocent act you've been putting on lately isn't who you really are. So don't even try to act like I'm being the crazy one here, when you're being a backstabbing bitch, who snuck off to be alone with Jax behind my back._

 _Jesus Christ, all we did was talk, while you were busy screwing Bright. But you know what, Em, I'm done ... I'm fucking done defending myself, because I haven't done anything that needs defending. At least not yet!_

 _What's that supposed to mean?_

 _Has it ever occurred to you that I might like him too, has it? Do my feelings for a guy ever get to trump yours?_

 _You do realize the only reasons he's even given you any attention, is because he feels sorry for you about what happened, and of course the fact that you're making it so goddamn easy for him._

 _Right, because you weren't trying to make it easy for him when you pushed your boobs in his face last night at my house ... I could have really used a friend last night, Em, but you were too busy drooling after him, and then you just left. Oh, and let's not forget the real reason you didn't stay over, we both know it wasn't because I was too drunk, but if you hadn't left, you wouldn't have gotten the chance to spend another five minutes pressed up against him when Opie gave you both a ride home. But yeah, I'm the one being a backstabbing bitch?_

Now behind the wheel of the car, with this slowly moving traffic, her heart is beating out of her chest again, while she's trying to fight the urge to cry at what all of this now means for her friendship with Emma. They've been friends for so long, she can't picture what it's like to not have her ... actually, she can picture it, a little. Knows from the few rather meaningless fights in the past what it is like, and truthfully, it was hell.

Besides the emotional toll it took not having your best friend to talk to and confide in, it was also awkward having to maneuver around mutual friends, trying to avoid each other at parties, or walking into a classroom, the cafeteria or some assembly at the gym, and suddenly not knowing your place anymore, not knowing who to sit with, this devastating feeling of being utterly alone in a room full of people. It hurt and it just ... it sucks!

So all of that is whirling around in her mind, as they make it out of the little forest, past one of the bridges that lead off of the island they'd been on in the middle of Lodi Lake, and just as they begin to think they're home free, the car in front of her begins to slow down considerably, then comes to a stop altogether. 

She quickly pushes her brakes, the Cutlass jerking to a sudden stop, Jax bracing himself with his hand on the dashboard in front of him, while she's glancing up in the rearview mirror, hoping the car behind them will react just as quickly, and won't plow into the rear of her dad's precious car. _She'd be so dead!_

"What's going on?" Jax asks, not able to see anything from his seat on the passenger side.

That's when Tara tries to shake her thoughts of Emma, and focus all her attention on her current company and the ride back to Charming instead, which has somehow come to a screeching halt completely.

She lowers her window, cranes out her neck to see up ahead, and curses under her breath when she once again notices the red and blue flashing lights of police vehicles. Everyone that left the party in a hurry, has driven straight into a trap! 

"It's a roadblock ... or traffic stop, ... whatever it's called." Tara huffs in annoyance, gesturing with her hand up ahead out of her still open window.

She's glancing over at Jax, when a rush of panic is beginning to come over her at the implication, and all the spiteful words exchanged with Emma are all but forgotten again, because she's distracted by her current predicament instead.

"Probably just checking for drunk drivers," Jax replies, not really concerned, until he notices the change in Tara's facial expression. "What?" He asks, then adds with raised eyebrows and a hint of a smile tugging the corners of his lips upwards. "Don't tell me you've been drinking, Knowles?" He's obviously teasing her, because he's held her close enough to kiss, close enough to know that there is no alcohol on her breath. 

"No, it's not that." Tara seems unfazed by his flirtatious teasing, hesitates though, but quickly realizes there really is no use, she's about to get busted, with Jackson Teller in her car. "I just ..." she bites her lip, glancing over at him in embarrassment. "I don't technically have my license yet."

"What do you mean by _technically_?" Jax looks back at her confused, then his eyes take in the row of cars still at a stop ahead of them for just a second, before he focuses all his attention back at her. _Damn, she's cute when she's flustered!_

Tara starts to explain, the words jumbling out of her mouth rather fast, leaving no doubt just how nervous she is at the moment. "My birthday isn't for another two and a half weeks, so I still just have my permit, and since my dad's out of town for the night, Em and I, we sort of borrowed his car, thinking he would never find out, but now ..."

She looks up ahead, noting the caravan moving again, so she lets her foot off the brakes and slowly starts rolling again too. "But now I'm gonna get busted, and probably lose my permit, can completely forget about ever getting my license, and my dad will probably ground me for the next decade, or ... some shit." She adds the rest with a frustrated shake of her head.

Then she taps the brakes, slowing the car to a stop again, and Jax snaps out of his stupor. "Alright, well, ... I've got a license, so let's just switch seats then."

"What? No, we can't." Tara looks back at him with an _are-you-crazy_ expression. "They'll catch us." Her eyes dart cautiously in the direction of the cops, as if they might even be overhearing their conversation right this moment.

Jax shakes his head and tries to sound reassuring. "No, they won't. Not if we do it before we get too close. Trust me, I've done this before." He quickly lowers his window, leans out, and glances up at the cars and trucks ahead, counting at least six or seven of them, still at a dead stop. "Alright, as soon as we move and stop again, you put the car all the way in park, scoot as far forward in your seat as you can, and I'll climb in behind you. And then ... you'll climb over here." 

_Well, he sure makes it sound easy enough!_

He meets her eyes. "What do you have to lose?"

He's right, and it's not like they're doing it because she's been drinking. She wouldn't drink and drive, could easily pass a sobriety test to prove that, so if they do get busted, she'd just tell them the truth, that it was just about her license or rather the lack thereof. It's definitely worth a shot, considering the consequences she'll have to face if they don't at least try.

A minute later, the car ahead of them starts moving again, and Tara lets her car slowly roll forward too, and just like Jax has instructed her to do, upon stopping, she shifts the gear all the way in park, scoots to the front edge of her seat, and waits for Jax to slip onto the seat behind her.

Considering the rather limited cabin room of the Cutlass, he manages to do so much faster than she'd anticipated him to. So she tries to hurry just as quickly, but is suddenly flustered and feeling trapped, because his crotch is right behind her butt, and his thighs are to either side of hers, and the damn steering wheel is so much larger than in the average car cutting into her thighs, since she's sitting so much forward, and she finds herself struggling to move at all, let alone move over into the passenger seat. 

"Here, lemme help you," Jax says, realizing her dilemma, and before she knows what he means by that, he's already grabbing her by her waist with both his hands and pulls her back towards him, right onto his lap, helping her out from her predicament of being weirdly wedged between the steering wheel and his much bigger and muscular frame. 

He releases his tight grip, just casually letting his hands rest on her waist now instead, and she's able to pull her left knee up closer to her chest, her foot on the edge of the seat now, and he gives her another boost with his hands, helping her so she can slide off of him and over onto the seat beside him.

Truth be told, the whole act was pretty fucking awkward. She's sure she's blushing, can feel the heat rising to her cheeks, and her body is also tingling all over because of the way he'd just grabbed her and pulled her against his groin, but she tries her best to shake the feelings and the images his move has conjured up in her head. This is neither the time, nor the place.

So instead she just straightens herself out, pulling down the hem of her tank top that rode up a little, while Jax reluctantly pries his eyes away from her, taking note of the cop that's walking down alongside the row of cars now, flashlight in hand.

"Shit!" He curses, gaining her attention. "Seatbelt, babe. Let's not give 'em anything to bitch about." He adds, reaching up over his own shoulder, before he's looking up to follow his hand now in confusion, realizing there's nothing there to grab.

"There's just a lap belt." Tara clarifies as she's buckling herself in quickly, and Jax manages to pull the belt across him and click it in place just in the nick of time before the deputy appears by their side, shining the flashlight into the cabin of the car in passing, but doesn't stop or even bother to say a word to them. 

Tara raises her hand up to her heart in relief and lets out the breath she didn't even realize she's been holding, before she glances over at Jax to meet his eyes, only to find that they are already fixed on her. Then they both look over their shoulder at the same time, their eyes following the retrieving form of the policeman walking further down the line of stopped cars behind them.

They relax back into their seats just as the vehicles start moving, so Jax puts the car in gear and lets it slowly roll forward until they come to a stop once more. Then their eyes meet again, both taking in a deep breath and subsequently letting out another sigh of relief.

Jax flashes her a toothy grin then, his dimples showing on his clean-shaven face, and even in the darkened interior of the car, his blue eyes are shining back at hers like sapphires, and ... Jesus Christ, it does things to her insides that she's honestly never experienced before ... ever! 

So in return Tara can't keep the mischievous smirk from her face either, still trying to wrap her mind around everything that has happened this far, and moments later they both can't hold back any longer and begin to laugh out loud simultaneously, happy to have gotten away with it.

X

They stop at a twenty-four-hour burger joint, where they sit, eat and talk for just a little bit, before they get some milkshakes to-go and get back on the road again. The rest of the ride back to Charming is rather uneventful in terms of trouble with the law. Mainly because Jax purposely keeps the car right on the allowed speed limit, not wanting to risk getting pulled over at all again, because the thought of her getting grounded would pretty much ruin the rest of his summer plans. 

The radio is playing in the background of their lively conversation about all sorts of random things, like random books they've both read and liked, the latest movies that have been showing, or any other upcoming parties in Charming or the surrounding little towns they might both end up at, amongst many other things.

All in all, they once more find that they enjoy each other's company so much, and that words and the banter with each other come so natural, so easy, that it kind of bewilders them both, yet neither is willing to actually admit that little fact out loud, least of all to each other. 

They've passed the 'Welcome to Charming' sign a while ago, and Jax slows down as he takes the turn onto Piney's road, but brings the Cutlass to a stop a little ahead of the yellow house when he takes notice of the pickup parked in the drive. Whatever Opie's reason had been to leave him behind, it had apparently not deterred him to head back home. 

He shifts the gear in park and looks over at her, meeting her eyes yet again, but Tara points out the obvious, before he can. "Looks like Opie made it back alright."

"Yeah," Jax replies, with another glance towards the truck, and the lights that are on inside the house, raising his eyebrows. "Looks like it." 

"Has he ever done that before? Leave you like that, I mean?" Tara asks curiously, but when she sees the little flash of annoyance in his eyes, she instantly regrets asking.

"No." Jax shakes his head, then adds to clarify. "Well, I mean, if he was trying to hook up with a chick or something, yeah, maybe, but no, never like that ... never without giving me a heads up at least." As soon as the words have left his lips, he knows he's probably just over-shared more than he should've.

"Still, he's probably worried. And wondering where you are." Tara states, and honestly believes it too, not at all surprised or put off by what Jax had said. She has spent enough time around her guy friends that things like this don't offend her in the least.

"You know, you're probably right." Jax nods his head in agreement. "And he fucking should be worried ... Anyways, what are your plans for the rest of the night?" He suddenly questions her, meeting her eyes with a hint of mischief in them when an idea comes to him how to make Opie suffer and make him pay for his crime a little bit longer.

Tara points at herself in surprise. "Me? Hmm, I don't know. I don't really have any plans now." She says, shaking her head. "I think it's safe to say I'm not crashing at Emma's place tonight, so I guess I'll just be going home."

There's a sudden flash of something in her eyes that Jax can't decipher at first when she says those words, but he remembers their earlier conversation at the party, how she said she can't sleep when her dad's not home and it suddenly dawns on him then. "Well, I'm not sure what happened with Emma and you earlier, but I'm pretty pissed off at Ope myself." He glances at his wristwatch. "Feel like getting a movie? The rental place is still open for another twenty minutes?"

X

Jax is busy studying the wall with the newest releases, while Tara's randomly walking through the aisles, trying to appear casual while she's looking for something interesting, even though she's beginning to seriously panic on the inside, all the while hoping it doesn't show on her face.

It turns out it's fucking hard to focus on picking a movie, when all you can think about is the fact that the boy you have suddenly developed an irrational crush on, the boy who was the reason you just had a huge fight with your best friend earlier, has asked to crash on your couch for the night. Tonight of all nights, all alone in the house, just the two of you, because your cousin went back home to San Diego and your father is out of town again too.

And worst of all, you were so caught off guard by this unexpected request, that you just agreed, ... in hindsight probably way too easy and way too quickly too. But dammit, there is just something about the way he explained it all, combined with the sweet and downright harmless look in his baby blue eyes, that you just couldn't say no to, even if you had tried.

It sounded innocently enough the way he proposed it, simply needing a place to crash because he wants to make Opie suffer by having him wonder where he is all night. Then went on to explain that he can't go home, because his mom and Clay usually plan some romantic - but mostly gross- evening whenever they assume he's staying out. 

And the last thing he wants is to walk in on his step-dad and mom doing _it_ , like on the dining room table or some shit like that. He'd only half-joked that the last time that happened, it scarred him for life, and he hasn't set foot into the laundry room of their home ever since. 

The pissing-off-Opie thing is a little bit out there, she admits, because she really can't picture Opie to deliberately leave Jax behind without having a good reason. She figures there's got to be more to the story than that, but Jax is still too pissed about that to give Opie even the chance to explain himself.

But the second thing, about not wanting to be walking in on his mom and Clay, _that_ she gets one hundred percent. Mostly because she can still remember walking in on her dad with Laura, the woman he started seeing about a year and a half after Tara's mom had died, and let's just say there's just some things you can never unsee, no matter how much you wish you could.

She's so lost in her thoughts, and those damn butterflies in her stomach, that she hasn't even noticed him walking up behind her until he casually runs his hand up her back, before he drapes his arms around her shoulder like he did earlier tonight. "Find anything good? I think Frank's getting impatient with us. We're the last people in here."

Tara tries not to stiffen under Jax's touch, looking up at the clerk near the register rhythmically tapping his fingers in irritation against the counter, while he's watching the two teenagers like a hawk.

"No, not really. You?" She asks, even though she can see that he's got nothing in his hands.

"No, all the good new shit is already checked out for the weekend." He says, but then suddenly reaches for a movie right in front of them. "What about this one? Have you seen it?" He holds it up for her to see.

Tara looks perplexed at his choice. "True Romance? Um, no, I haven't."

"Me neither." He says, turning the video over and holding it in front of her, so she can look at it too, before he leans even closer into her, dropping his arm from her shoulder down to her waist instead as he reads the premise of the movie out loud.

His voice level and unwavering, as if he is the actual narrator in the trailer for the movie. "True Romance is the story of two unlikely lovers - Christian Slater and Patricia Arquette - whose whirlwind romance propels them into a dangerous game of high-stakes negotiations and high-speed adventure. The pair find themselves in unexpected possession of a suitcase full of valuable mob contraband, which they plan to take from Detroit to Los Angeles. There, they plan to sell the goods and begin a new life, but the gangsters - and the police - have other ideas."

He turns it over to the front cover once more, giving it a good look, before he reads that as well. "Stealing. Cheating. Killing. Who says romance is dead?" He glances down at her right beside him, smirking when he says. "What do you think, Knowles? Are you up for some _True Romance_?"

"Sure!" She answers before she can think better of it, her whole body is practically buzzing from the cheer proximity to him, in combination with that dazzling smile he's giving her, as he's walking her back towards the register now to pay.

 _Jesus Christ, I am so dead ... Emma is going to fucking kill me!_

X

They decide to stop at the twenty-four-hours-convenience store that, contradictory to its name, closes overnight during weekdays and only truly stays open around the clock on weekends, like tonight.

Tara mainly wants to pick up some ice cream to eat while they'll be watching the movie, quite literally needing something to cool her rising body temperature down a bit, while Jax insists on getting some microwave popcorn, along with some other snacks and then adds a six-pack to share between them as well.

"This is Charming, everyone here knows who we are, Jax." Tara touches his arm to gain his attention, shaking her head at him, before she physically pulls him back towards the coolers, trying to stop him from carrying the beer over to the register, whispering now when she adds. "I don't care how real your fake ID looks, there's no way in hell this is going to work, Teller."

"Relax, I know this guy, we've got an understanding, he lets me buy shit all the time." He says in a hushed voice, yet drapes his arm around her shoulder again, pulling her in even closer so he can whisper in her ear. "I slip him an extra five to pocket for himself, and he turns a blind eye, trust me, babe." He gives her his most charming smile now that makes her want to melt into a puddle by his feet. Needless to say, Tara concedes. 

And moments later, true to his word, the twenty-something guy behind the counter, who Tara recognizes from Church, doesn't even bat an eye when Jax puts the beer in front of him, nor when he asks for a pack of cigarettes to be added as well. He simply starts ringing up the goods, no questions asked.

Jax is already counting out his cash to pay, before he notices that Tara's still holding the pint of chocolate chip ice cream in her hand. He quickly nods towards the guy, Leslie, at least that's what his name tag reads. "Hey, man, did you get the ice cream?" 

Leslie shakes his head but without a further prompt quickly adds the price of the frozen dessert and gives Jax his new total, just as Tara tries to intervene. "You really don't have to pay for me?" 

They've already had this sort of discussion earlier at the little food joint in Lodi, where he'd tried to pay for her meal and shake too. Tara had pointed out that it wasn't a date, and they were just friends. And when he said he'd pick up the tab as her friend then, she'd asked him if he made a habit of picking up Opie's tab too.

Needless to say, she won that argument, however, this one doesn't look like it will go her way, since Jax is already handing over the cash to the guy behind the counter. 

Tara can be just as stubborn as he is, so she tries to hand the money to Jax now instead. "Here, I can pay for my own."

But he quite literally waves the offered cash away with his hand, ignoring her request to take it, before he reaches for the bag of his stuff, and the six-pack of beer on the counter while he says. "It's the least I can do, babe, considering I'll be crashing at your place." 

_Shit! Really, Teller? Do you have to announce your sleepover to all of Charming?_

For the first time tonight she wants to smack him square in the chest for his loose lips. His well-formed and mesmerizing and deliciously full, loose lips, but still, ... this guy, Leslie, goes to her church, and Tara has no doubt this will come back to bite her in the ass one of the upcoming Sundays.

She can practically feel Leslie's eyes burning holes in her back when Jax, despite his full hands, holds the door open for her on the way out. There is enough gossip going around about her already, she really doesn't need to add any more fuel to the fire, but she fears the damage is already done.

X

"Where are the bowls again?" Jax half-yells from the kitchen while looking through the cupboards to find a bowl to pour the bags of microwave popcorn into, right when the microwave beeps again, letting him know the second bag is done as well. 

"I'll be right there," Tara calls out, and moments later steps into the room, quickly shows him where to find it, while he's just gawking at her in awe, completely caught off guard by the new outfit she's changed into. 

She gets a small bowl out for herself and proceeds to scoop some ice cream into it, before she glances back at him over her practically naked shoulder. "You sure you don't want some? There's more than enough."

 _He does want some, but not the damn ice cream!_

"Nah, thanks, I'm good." He shakes his head along to his reply, then gestures towards the big bowl of popcorn he's holding in front of him, and when Tara turns her back to him once more, he goes back to admiring her from head to toe again too.

Even though she was wearing way less and showing much more skin earlier at the lake, she sure wears the fucking hell out of these black shiny spandex leggings and the grey oversized sweatshirt, that just barely falls passed the curve of her ass.

Tara fucking Knowles could give Jennifer Beals a run for her money, especially with the collar cut out like that, so it falls seductively off one of her shoulders, revealing the thin black strap to what he presumes must be her bra.

He's quite literally licking his lips when his eyes roam over her, unable to keep the toothy grin from his face when she bends over to get a can of whipped cream from the fridge to top off her ice cream treat with. _Fuck, is she trying to kill me?_

She puts the can back in the fridge, the rest of the ice cream back into the freezer above, and flicks off the kitchen lights on the way back to the living room, with Jax traipsing right behind her, hot on her heels.

Jax settles down on the couch, the bowl of popcorn on the cushion beside him as he reaches for one of the beers, using the bottom of his lighter in place of a bottle opener to pry the lid off of his drink, taking a first long swig, while Tara pushed the VHS tape into the VCR player and is now turning the TV to the correct channel. 

"Want one?" Jax breaks her concentration, as she fiddles with the TV remote in one hand and the VCR remote in the other.

She bites her lip in indecision as she's looking back at him and the second beer he's already grabbed from the pack, just waiting for her to say yes. "Yeah, okay, just one though." She replies, the part about just having one is secretly more directed at herself than him.

The tape starts playing and she puts the remotes down on the coffee table in front of Jax, right as he holds her open beer out to her. Tara takes a quick sip, scrunching her nose at the taste, because truthfully, in her opinion, beer does not taste good, and she would not be drinking it if she didn't need something to calm her fucking nerves a little bit tonight.

She clutches the bottle in her hand, the previews starting to play already on the TV screen behind her, so she hurries to double-check that the front door is locked, before she flicks off the rest of the lights in the house, and finally allows herself to settle down on the old yet comfy couch with him. 

She's pulling her bare feet up onto the couch, sitting down with her legs crisscrossed, Indian-style, with a pillow in her lap, and then finally reaches and begins to eat her bowl of ice cream that has already begun to melt. 

Jax on the other hand kicks off his sneakers and props his feet up onto the coffee table in front of them, crossing his legs comfortably at his ankles instead, and is already absentmindedly snacking away on the big bowl of popcorn that he's pulled onto his lap.

The opening credits for the movie begin to play and they start watching, yet both keep glancing at one another throughout the movie, to see the other's reaction to a scene, gladly realizing that it mostly matches their own.

Jax is mesmerized by her, by every little move she makes, from the way she licked the last of the ice cream from the spoon, to being envious of the beer bottle she's raising up to her lips to drink from.

And she's no better off than he is. She's got butterflies throughout the whole show, wishing she knew what to truly make of all of this. Was he really just here to teach Opie some kind of lesson? Or was there more to it than that?

On one hand, she's suddenly realized that she might want it to be more, and wants to believe in what Opie had said last night, that Jax might actually like her.

Yet every time she allows her heart to go there, or her mind to conjure up the possibility of something more to happen between them, she starts feeling guilty again, like she's betraying Emma once more.

Because even now, even after that ugly fight earlier tonight, it's hard for Tara to put aside their friendship, no matter how charming Jax has been treating her, and how handsome he is to look at.

 _Truthfully, she could look at him all day and never get tired of the view!_ But it makes her feel bad, and she knows a relationship probably won't work out when it comes to such a heavy dose of guilt attached to it right from the start. 

X

The end credits start to play and she leans back on the couch, lowering her feet to the carpeted floor, stretching her arms straight up over her head for a long couple of seconds, even letting out a yawn that she's trying to hide from him by turning her face away, before she reaches for the VCR remote, and start to rewind the tape already.

She flips through the TV channels, stopping on a rerun of an old ALF episode, but turns the volume almost all the way down, before she leans forward and starts to clean up the coffee table already too.

She puts her empty ice cream bowl, Jax's candy wrappers, and the five empty beer bottles, two of which were hers, into the empty oversized bowl, before she stands, feeling just the tiniest bit of a buzz, and carries it all back to the kitchen. 

Jax tries to help but she is too quick, yet he still follows wordlessly right behind her, helping her on this end instead, throwing the trash away for her, emptying the remaining unpopped corn kernels from the big bowl into the trash can, while she starts rinsing the dishes.

He leans back against the kitchen counter, his eyes taking note of her dog's food and water bowl, when something suddenly dawns on him. "Hey, ... where's your dog?"

Tara turns the water off, reaching for the dish towel and dries her hands as she glances over at him just a few feet away from her. "He's at one of my dad's friends places, ... you know, since I was supposed to stay at my friend's house tonight."

She's been so preoccupied with her confusing feelings towards Jax, that she hadn't realized until right this moment, without even her dog Sue here to keep her company, that she would be completely alone in the house tonight, if it wasn't for Jax staying over. 

And for the first time tonight, some of that guilt that's been eating at her is suddenly getting replaced by a sense of relief, at the thought of him being here with her.

"Right." Jax interrupts her thoughts when he recalls her plans for a sleepover with Em now, and suddenly curiosity's getting the best of him. "What happened between you and your sidekick anyways?"

At that Tara deadpans, speechless as she recites his words back in her own head, before she can't help but chuckle. "I'm sorry, my what?"

"Emily, or Emma? The blond chick? Your sidekick?" He starts to clarify, then pushes his hands in his jeans pockets, ever so casually, yet the way the muscles on his forearms flex make her heart palpitate. "What was she so pissed about?"

 _You ... she was pissed about you with me!_

But that's even beside the point, because right now Tara's still reeling from the fact that Jax referred to Emma as her sidekick, when Tara has always seen herself in that role instead. "First of, Emma is not my sidekick ... if anything, I'm hers -."

"Bullshit," Jax replies, before he adds as an explanation. "You're the one that catches everyone's eye first, babe, so ..." 

"I doubt that." Tara quips back, even rolling her eyes at the notion.

"Well, it's true," Jax replies, sounding sincere. "You sure as shit caught mine first." 

Normally she'd be blushing by now, feeling flattered, but she's not at all, the opposite really, because she's literally not buying it, not even a little.

She's had her fair share of admirers, some boys just wanting to hook up, while others wanted to date her. She's been told that she's pretty, or cute, or hot by plenty of them, so it's not like she sees herself as some ugly duckling by any means.

But that being said, standing next to tall, skinny, tanned, blue-eyed, naturally-bleach-blond, beautiful Emma, an ugly duckling is exactly what she becomes in a side-by-side comparison with her best friend. And truthfully, it's something she's come to accept a long time ago, so it doesn't really even bother her anymore at this point. What does bother her though is getting patronized about it, like Jax is doing right fucking now. 

Tara's awkwardly tucking her long hair behind her ear, not really sure what else to say now, without it sounding like she's fishing for compliments, so she simply decides to move on and answer his first initial question instead.

She obviously can't tell him the whole truth, so she at least tries to stick as close to it as she can. "The fight was ... Em was mad that I had disappeared for over two hours, and things kind of escalated from there, you know, we both said some shit we didn't mean."

"Whoa, wait a minute." He raises both his hands up, palms facing her way, studying her facial expression with way too much scrutiny. "You're just gonna ignore the fact that I just admitted that you caught my eyes first? No smirk, not even a teeny-tiny smile, no reaction at all, really?"

 _Jesus Christ, why can't he just let it go!_ Tara shrugs her shoulders, biting nervously on her thumbnail when she finally dares to meet his penetrating gaze. Her eyes conveying the doubt she has in what he's said. "What do you expect me to say, Jax?" She shakes her head. "Sorry, but I don't buy it?"

"You don't buy what?" Jax asks right back, his eyebrows drawn together in confusion.

She folds her arms in front of herself again, ready to prove him wrong, ready to prove that he's a liar. "Emma looks like one of those girls straight out of a fashion magazine, so yeah, sorry, but I don't buy that I caught your eyes first, Teller." She shrugs her shoulders at him yet again.

"Oh yeah, you're right, she does look like right out of a magazine." Jax actually agrees with her, and Tara smirks, knew that she was right all along, until he adds. "She looks just as anorexic as they all do."

"No she does not," Tara replies, sounding almost outraged, actually coming to Emma's defense, because that is not at all what she meant when she was comparing her to those models. 

But then something else comes to mind that easily contradicts what he said, so she adds. "Just admit it, Teller, if it hadn't been for that break-in, you and I wouldn't even be hanging out, let alone talking. We'd still be blissfully ignoring each other like we have for the last school year." 

"Yeah, okay, maybe you're right." He can acknowledge that she's got a valid point there, but still, he knows she's still wrong about the crux of the matter, because God knows he's noticed her more than once over the last year or two. Hell, he's noticed her for much longer than that even, and he's always thought she was much prettier than her blond friend. "That still doesn't mean you didn't catch my eye, babe. It just means that you had a boyfriend the whole time, and I was still dating my ex too."

Tara's trying to think of something to say for a second, and she still feels very much on the offense, still not really allowing herself to believe him, so in her quest to prove him wrong, she suddenly says. "Okay, if that wasn't bullshit just now, if you aren't lying, then give me an example?"

Jax is taken by surprise by her request, yet a very vivid memory from last summer comes back to his mind with ease, and so he starts to recount it solely for her benefit. "Near the end of last year's summer break, there was a party, someplace outside Charming, I think it was Darren Brenner's grandparents' cottage, or some shit. Like a ridiculously oversized looking log cabin, it had one of those huge staircases with one of those indoor balconies up top, that overlooked the main living space down below. Well, I was standing up there and saw you down there, I think you were trying to convince your boyfriend to dance with you. I guess he didn't feel up to it, so you went out there with some of your friends instead. And man, I couldn't keep my eyes off of you when you started dancing. It was crazy hot that night, and you had your hair up in a high ponytail, dangly silver earrings, a big oversized bracelet too big, so it slid up and down your arm when you danced, but it looked great. You were wearing a blood-red colored dress, tight up top, kinda flowy from the waist down, with thin spaghetti straps that looked like they might snap at any moment. You looked amazing, but I swear, while everyone else around you was dancing for an audience, you were dancing like no one else was in the fucking room. I still remember Amy and I got in a huge fight that night, because she was pissed that I kept ogling you." 

"Yeah, okay." She hastily replies, because she wants him to stop talking now. Wishing she could ward away the onslaught of more butterflies in her stomach. She's blushing uncontrollably now, her cheeks feel like they're on fire.

She can't believe he would not only remember seeing her there, but the fact that he can recall what she looked like that night, is doing all kinds of funny things to her insides. Clearly she's not prepared for this kind of attention from him, so all she can think of saying is. "I think you proved your point. I believe you."

"You know those blushing cheeks look really cute on you from over here." He can't stop himself from teasing her now, feeling just a tad bit validated that he was able to convince her.

Now Tara actually covers her reddening cheeks with both her hands, wishing she could make herself go invisible right now, but since she can't she meets his eyes a moment later, trying for a witty comeback. "Well, you, Teller, look very much like a jerk, who's trying to embarrass me on purpose, from over here." At that she cocks her head to the side a bit, before she actually sticks her tongue out at him. 

Jax laughs out loud at that, he just can't help himself, when he adds. "Still cute, Knowles, still really cute!"

She grabs the dishtowel off of the counter and throws it right at him, but he manages to catch it before it hits him in the face, and throws it right back at her, but she can dodge it as well. 

Tara can't help but laugh now either. What the hell else is she supposed to do now?

She tries to change the subject back to his sidekick comment, when she says. "You know the sidekick is usually the shorter ones, and Emma's got at least an inch and a half on me." 

"Well, shit, by that logic, I'd be Opie's sidekick too ... and you know there's no way that's right, babe." He jokes, grinning ear to ear.

"So you're saying you're Batman, and Opie's your Robin?" Tara jokes back, smiling herself at her underlying insinuation.

"You totally made that sound gay on purpose, didn't you?" He asks in reply, but then chuckles, enjoying their banter and the genuine smile on her face way too much.

The laughter dies down between them, but they're still smiling at each other.

"Are you tired yet?" Tara suddenly asks out of the blue. After all, it was already Sunday morning.

Jax shakes his head though. "Not really, not yet anyway." 

"Maybe there's something else on TV to watch?" Tara says, and with it suggesting to head back to the living room.

But this time on their way through the dining room, Jax notices the Stephen King book she'd shown him at Hanna's last week, Gerald's Game. He grabs it off of the table, bringing it along and is holding it up for her to see when they reach the couch again. "Did you ever finish this?"

Now Tara frowns again, shaking her head no, and Jax instantly wishes he would've kept his big fat mouth shut, but he knows he can't backtrack now.

He sits down beside her, opening the book to the place of her bookmark. If he had to guess, he'd say she's got about a quarter of the story left to read.

Jax is reading over the first couple of sentences on the top of that page when an idea suddenly comes to him. "Looks like I might have to break one of my golden rules for you, Knowles?

"What rule would that be?" Tara asks a little intrigued, while she's flipping through the TV channels to find something for them to watch.

"The one where I read the end of a book first." He says, meeting her eyes when she looks back at him.

"What do you mean?" She's not entirely sure what he's suggesting. Is he gonna read it and then tell her what happens? Is that the idea?

"I'll read it for you ... you know, to you." He says so utterly indifferent, like it's the most normal thing in the world for teenagers to read to each other ... out loud. "That way you'll finally find out what the hell happens, ... put the last of this fucking nightmare behind you for good."

She's actually speechless for a moment, doesn't know what to say, because the whole idea is ... well, it sounds pretty fucking weird, but at the same time it's also incredibly sweet that he seems to care this much.

But her long pause has Jax speaking up again, wondering out loud. "You do want to know what happens, right?"

"I do," Tara replies with a somber sounding voice, still not sure what to really think of it, and how to respond. 

"Alright then." He says, making up her mind for her when he leans back into the couch to get more comfortable, propping his legs back onto the coffee table again too. "Let's do this."

Tara swallows the lump in her throat for a second, still not sure what to make of this, but at last she decides to just go with it, settles down onto the couch right beside him.

"I think I'm gonna start over at the beginning of this chapter though. That alright with you?" Jax asks, glancing over at her and when Tara simply nods, he's quickly turning a few pages back, and clears his throat before he begins to read out loud to her.

While Jax is already starting to read, she hurriedly flicks the TV off, grabs a blanket, props her legs up just like him, and drapes it over both their legs, before she clutches a pillow to her chest, at last, feeling finally comfortable and truly ready to give him her undivided attention. 

Tara watches him a little skeptically, still somewhat surprised, yet also intrigued by the fact that he's really doing this for her, especially considering that she's still not really sure what to think, or rather how to feel about it.

Truthfully, she's a little afraid that even with him being the one doing the actual reading, she might still lose her nerves and will have to tell him to stop. She's just not sure yet what's going to happen, but she'd consider it a win if they actually manage to finish the book tonight.

She studies his face, takes in his serious expression when his eyes travel over the page in concentration. And his voice matches his appearance, sounding earnest as he's speaking the words out loud. _Dammit, even his voice is beautiful!  
_

_How is she going to explain this to Emma? She will never ever believe this!_

X

Author's Note: I'm so glad this chapter is finally finished. I can't wait to hear what you think, so leave me a few words with your thoughts please. Thank you! 


	9. There's a rumor going around

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

The not so far away sound of a car door banging shut is what has abruptly brought Tara out of her dreams and for a few fleeting moments she finds herself in a semi-conscious state.

She's still really tired though, so she tries to ignore it and hopes she can fall back asleep, nuzzles her cheek further into the pillow instead, and when the blanket at her waist doesn't budge as she tries to tug it higher, she lazily drapes her arm across her eyes to keep the light out instead. She hasn't slept this good alone in the house since before that night she'd gotten attacked, and she doesn't want it to be over just yet.

But before she can fall back into mindlessness, she's vaguely becoming aware that there's something or rather someone tangled up beneath the blanket with her, both her legs and feet seem 'stuck' and immobile somehow, but it's nothing unusual or something that alarms her in the least, because her dog Sue was known to get himself comfortable every which way. At least that's who she figures is partially trapping her under his weight, per usual.

She might've heard a small knock on the front door, but since she's not sure, and it's all quiet again now, she decides to simply ignore it. Instead she finds herself struggling against Sue, to free her legs so she can roll onto her stomach to get more comfortable and doze off again. But when the knock becomes louder, and then the actual doorbell chimes too, she can no longer ignore it and lets out an unladylike groan in frustration, right before a very sleepy, yet also very distinctively male-sounding voice mumbles. "Think there's someone at the door, babe."

 _Holy Shit!_ Tara's head jerks up suddenly in alarm, taking in the man-sized boy lying beside her, and every memory from last night comes instantly flooding back to her now, fuzzy-edged dream-like flashbacks right before her eyes, the party, the fight with Em, the diner, the movie, the beers, the book, along with the fact that it's Jax who she's shared the couch and a blanket with all night.

The last thing she remembers after he'd finished reading to her, is sitting here watching reruns of ALF, but they obviously must've somehow fallen asleep here together, head-to-feet, so to speak, and it's now that she's realizing it's his body, his limbs that are wrapped awkwardly around her, one of his long legs is wedged partially under her back, and it's him that's been keeping her feet pinned to the couch.

An instant little blush creeps up her cheeks, suddenly aware of every inch of his body touching and pressing up against hers and vice versa, along with the realization that she's sort of, kind of, been snuggling with Jackson Teller all night without even realizing it. _Yeah, she probably shouldn't have had that third beer while he had been reading to her!_

The doorbell chimes again twice, whoever is out there is clearly becoming more impatient, and she's quickly wiping at her eyes and blinking herself fully awake, while pulling her legs, one at a time, out from Jax's grasp, and it's the extraction of her limbs that's making him stir and turn over onto his side now too, slowly blinking himself awake.

He glances over at her then, assessing her wordlessly with a sleepy, yet smiling expression lingering on his face. And he looks so good lying here like this, like he belongs, all tangled up in the blanket and the countless throw pillows scattered all around him. He's kind of bashfully scratching the back of his head while he looks at her, his hair all messy and adorable, that Tara struggles to think straight in that moment, because she never would've pictured herself waking up next to Jax like this ... ever!

"Morning." Again it's Jax who speaks up, stretching his arms overhead now, yawning lazily, then props himself up on one elbow and reaches up to rub the sleep from his eyes with his other hand, before he runs that same hand through his unruly hair, while his bright blue orbs seem to zero in on her once again across the couch from him.

"Morning," Tara replies, thankful that she manages to get the word out sounding somewhat normal, despite the fact that she's feeling flustered and is blushing all at once. She's noticed that he's stripped out of his shirt overnight, she's taking quick stock of her own clothing, relieved to see that she hasn't accidentally undressed in her sleep too, and then is scrambling to her feet to rush to answer the door.

But before she can even make it two steps in that direction, she suddenly finds herself lightheaded and swaying back and forth after getting up way too quickly. But to keep herself from falling towards the coffee table, she overcompensates when leaning the other way, quickly realizing her mistake, but it's too late, she can't catch herself in time before she falls rather helplessly and awkwardly back towards the couch.

With his eyes still fixed on her, Jax realizes what is happening, suddenly sits up just in time, and manages to grab her by the hips just enough to help her break her fall, letting out a surprised "Whoa" just before she lands right in his lap. She's so embarrassed.

 _Could things get any worse this morning?_ The answer to Tara's internal question turns out to be a resounding _yes_. Because what do you know? There's no mistaking it, he's hard against her behind, she couldn't have missed it even if she tried. _Oh. My. God. Kill me now!_

"Are you alright?" Jax asks from behind her shoulder with concern in his voice, his hands already slipping beneath her sweater, rough fingertips grazing across her bare skin when he holds onto her by her waist as he gently, but quickly lifts her off of his lap and onto the couch cushion right beside him. The skin he's touched still tingling after he lets go of her.

"Yeah, just got up too quick." Tara manages to huff while avoiding to look over at him out of fear that her eyes might travel too far south on their own accord. That thought alone is making her already pink cheeks blush even more bright pink now, just as another round of knocks vibrate against the door, followed by even more insistent ringing of the doorbell as well.

"Sorry." He says, clearing his throat, and despite her better judgment, his apology actually makes her meet his gaze for just a second, curious what he's apologizing for, until - much to her embarrassment - he explains. "It's just morning wood." _Do not look at his dick!_

Tara is horrified, truly horrified, yet she's forcing herself with everything she has to not let that emotion show openly on her face. She can't believe he'd actually bring it up, _with words that is_ , but before she can even think about how to respond to that, or if she even should respond at all, she realizes that Jax suddenly seems a little flustered too. "It's not because I was checking you out or anything, I mean ..." He pauses just for a split second, biting his lip, before he decides to further elaborate, even though Tara _really_ wishes he wouldn't. "I mean ... I _was_ checking you out and you already know that I think you're really hot, but it's just something that happens, you know, some mornings, ... so." _Please shut up! Please, please, please shut up!_

And that's when she suddenly realizes that Jackson Teller is blushing. Giving her a crooked little smirk, his cheeks tinted with just a touch of pink, but there's no denying it, he's definitely blushing, and it seems like such a rarity, like a never before seen phenomenon, that Tara has to force herself to look away from him and take a deep breath. _Oh. My. God._

Another knock and the doorbell rings again and again, interrupting the awkwardness in the air between them. _Saved by the bell!_

"Yeah, okay." She's not sure how she manages to speak, but glad that she does, and throws her thumb up in the direction of the door now. "I ... I'm gonna answer the door now." _Please, God, if you exist, don't let it be Emma at the door!_

Jax nods sitting up further, still smiling when she turns away from him, but out of the corner of her eye, she can see him yank the blanket off of him and readjusting himself in the jeans he's slept in.

And somehow she can't help but smile a little to herself now, amused and intrigued that one of the notorious bad-boys of Charming High somehow got flustered like this in her presence. Oddly enough, she's realizing it's making her feel less awkward, knowing she's got this effect on him in return. That this electricity she's feeling in his presence might not just be one-sided after all.

She runs both her hands through her long brown hair on her way across the room, and she can already make out Opie through the small glass triangles arranged in an arc-shaped window on the upper part of her front door.

She's already fearing the confrontation between Jax and him that is surely about to happen, so she dares to look back towards the couch again, meeting his eyes to warn him as she reaches for the lock on the door. "It's Opie." Then she quickly unlocks the door and pulls it open to meet the tall teenager's sorrowful eyes.

"Hey Tara." Opie huffs, looking tired and almost lost as he hovers awkwardly on her small front porch, nervously scratching the back of his head before he lets his eyes meet her eyes right on.

"Hi Opie," Tara replies, giving him a sweet and apologetic smile, waiting for him to reveal why he's here, even though she's already got a pretty good idea why.

"Listen." He starts, still searching her eyes, but not making a move to try to step inside, or further intrude on her in any way. "I talked to some friends, and they said that last night at the party, they um ... they said they saw you and Jax take off together." He pauses for just a second, clearly gauging her reaction before he continues. "So I was just wondering if ..." But whatever question he was about to ask dies on his lips, his words stopping abruptly the moment when Jax comes into view beside Tara.

He's still shirtless, and with no belt his jeans are hanging dangerously low on his hips when he steps even closer to casually drape his arm around her shoulders. Tara would've surely felt tingles all over, had it not been for the angry expression that crossed over Opie's face that very moment.

"Hey bro. What's up?" Jax says, a smirk creeping onto his no longer blushing face, and as if on instinct he quickly pulls Tara further back into the house and out of the way, when he sees Opie seething and angrily step towards him now.

"You were here this whole time?" Opie's got venom in his voice, his jaw ticks with barely suppressed rage, looking furious as his hands ball into fists by his side, looming over Jax now who's actually backing away further into the living room. "All night, making time with her, and you couldn't have called to let me know? Are you fucking kidding me?"

But it doesn't take long for Jax's anger to rise in him as last night's events come back to him as well. "You fucking left, Ope. Took the truck and left ... without saying a goddamn word." He hisses back at him in defense, coming to a standstill right in front of his best friend, sizing him up now as if he was facing an enemy, before he pushes hard against Opie's chest, forcing him to take a few steps back again. "The fucking cops showed up, asshole, you were nowhere to be found."

Opie is fuming, and Tara can honestly say she's never seen Piney's son ever look this angry for as long as she's known him than this moment when he pushes Jax back in return, much more violently though, making the blond hair, blue-eyed boy stumble awkwardly backward, nearly making him fall, but he can catch his footing.

And that's pretty much it, that's the moment when all hell breaks loose, and they charge at each other like wild dogs. They push and shove at each other, a few punches are thrown, but most of them thankfully don't really land where they're intended to, so instead they both somehow end up scrapping on the living room floor. Rolling around, mumbling curses at each other, trying to hold each other down, or choke each other out, while Tara watches on in horror from the sidelines, repeatedly pleading for them both to stop.

But when they don't stop, and instead nearly knock over a small shelf, she finally has enough and starts yelling. She reaches for Opie's arm, since he's the one on top at the moment, and tries to pull him off with all the strength she can muster, but to no avail.

"That's enough." She's almost screaming now, still tugging on Opie. "My dad will lose his mind if he hears about another fight in this house." That finally seems to be enough for both the boys to reluctantly, but slowly stop what they were doing.

Opie backs off and Tara let's go of his arm, but is watching him wearily as he backs away while Jax scrambles back to his feet as well. She looks back and forth between the both of them, shaking her head a little, and scowling at them. "Are you done now?" This isn't how best friends are supposed to act towards one another. She can't help but think of Emma just as that thought crosses her mind.

"Sorry, babe." Jax runs his hands through his hair, giving Tara an apologetic look, but is caught off guard when Opie speaks up again. "Do you have any fucking clue how many people I woke up this morning trying to find you, dickhead?"

"Nobody asked you to." Jax spat back, the apologetic look he'd just given Tara replaced with an angry scowl now as he starts arguing with Opie again. "You're not my fucking keeper."

"Yeah, right." Opie rolls his eyes at him, looking equally pissed if not more so. "And what was I supposed to say to my dad when he asks where you are? Or Clay, or your mom when she calls? With all the shit that's going on with the club, you think telling her that you vanished last night would go over well?"

"I wouldn't have vanished if you hadn't left without me. So not my fucking problem if my mom goes ape-shit on you, man." Jax snaps back at him furiously.

Another drawn-out argument ensues between them, cursing at one another when they step closer towards each other once more, ready to start round two, or at least so it seems to Tara, which makes her quickly step between the two boys. One hand bracing against Opie's chest, the other on Jax's bare chest, trying to push the angry friends further apart again. "Guys, this is stupid. You just need to cool off and actually talk. You shouldn't be fighting, and you definitely cannot be fighting in here."

But it's in that moment the front door makes a creaking noise as it is further pushed open a bit, and all three of them turn their heads in unison towards the tall blond teenage girl frowning at them in return.

A rush of panic overtakes Tara when she meets Emma's eyes. She takes in Emma's hurt expression that is quickly replaced with an angry frown, when the girl's eyes flicker across the room as she's taking in the scene in front of her with much more detail, noting Jax's discarded shirt and belt near the couch. The couch that looks suspiciously disheveled with the blanket, the pillows, and even the couch cushions looking askew, and it doesn't take a genius to realize that it's leaving the wrong impression once again to Tara's formerly best friend.

"Em," Tara calls, but it's already too late, she's already turned on her heels and has stormed out the door again, with Tara quickly charging after her.

"Em, wait," Tara calls again with a raised voice, catching up with her at the end of the driveway where she's parked behind Piney's truck, and Tara realizes that there's three more of their mutual friends from the Charming high cheerleading squad waiting in Emma's car. The passenger side glaringly empty, for what would've been her seat riding shotgun as usual.

"Would you just give me a minute to explain, please?" Tara says, sounding almost angry herself now. Not really directed at Emma, but she's mad at herself for how this must look to Emma, but also mad about the fact that she keeps finding herself in these types of situations where she has to keep defending herself. It's starting to get old!

Emma stops abruptly, as she reaches the driver's side door of her car, her hand already on the handle, but she doesn't open it yet. Tara can see now that there are tears welling up in Emma's eyes when their gaze finally meets, and a powerful rush of guilt and regret shoot through her at the sight of it. She's never intentionally meant to hurt Emma.

"You know I actually came here cause I was sorry about our fight yesterday." She says with a high pitched tone of voice and sniffs while wiping at her face. But just a split second later she raises her chin in defiance, her eyes drift to somewhere behind Tara, and the brunette doesn't need to turn around to know that Opie and Jax must've stepped out onto the porch behind her, drawing the attention of not just Emma to themselves, but all the girls in the car as well.

"I can't believe you did this." She says, and before Tara can wipe at her own tears and form a reply to her, Emma has already climbed in behind the wheel again and is peeling out of the driveway at record speed.

"You alright, Knowles." It's Opie who asks, stopping next to her as Tara stands there with her arms folded in front of herself, looking longingly after Emma's retrieving car until she can't see it anymore.

She looks up at him then, nodding her head, the self-loathing and sarcasm evident in her voice when she replies. "Yeah, just peachy."

Opie holds her gaze for a second longer, before he nods in some sort of silent understanding and then climbs into his truck and leaves as well.

X

Jax only asks her once what that odd confrontation with Emma was all about, but when his question seems to make Tara even more upset, he decides to drop the inquiry at once, realizing that she was in no mood to open up and talk about it with him. And as ridiculous as it sounds, the rejection stings a little considering how much she has shared with him the night before, combined with this overwhelming need of wanting to comfort and protect her.

But just like Opie and him, he figured Tara also needed time to calm down. He doesn't want to go, doesn't want to leave her when she's obviously very upset, but with the mood suddenly so gloomy, along with Tara saying that she actually wants to be alone, he reluctantly leaves her house shortly after.

He walks over to Opie's place alone, not just to shower and change into a clean change of clothes, but also to try to straighten things out with Opie too. Realizing now that their little spat has lasted much too long already.

When he gets there, he does just that. The short walk and fresh air has finally calmed him enough to allow Opie a chance to explain why he'd left the way he did, and also finally admitting that he probably should've let him know that he was staying with Tara, instead of leaving him wondering and worrying all night.

All is not forgiven nor forgotten by any means, Opie is still grumpy, he has barely gotten any sleep the night before out of worry, and clearly still has a chip on his shoulder even after Jax apologized, but hopefully he'll come around in a day or two and things would go back to normal between them.

Without much else to do about the matter, he disappears into the bathroom and takes a long hot shower, and instantly his mind begins to replay everything that has happened with Tara, yesterday and earlier this morning.

Overall, it has been a good night, ... a great night actually. He loves the fact that she'd opened up to him like she did out there in the woods by the lake, loves the other long talk they'd shared at the diner, as well as on the drive back to Charming, then the movie, and at last him reading the book to her, and their talk about it after.

Being able to open up about her feelings and emotions about the night of the break-in, along with finishing that book out loud with her, he could just tell how cathartic it has been for her, and in turn in makes him feel needed. And he realized he loves feeling needed by Tara.

That whole evening has been something else altogether. Jax can't recall having ever spent a night with a girl like this, leaving him with such an odd combination of emotions rushing through him all within the span of a couple of hours.

When she'd started to cry on his shoulder, at first he'd felt at a loss of what to do, but then he'd suddenly felt that same protectiveness towards her again, that he'd felt on the night of the break-in.

He couldn't recall ever feeling like this before for anyone else. That revelation, along with the comfortable, carefree and amusing conversation they'd shared the rest of the night, and not to forget the undeniable attraction he feels towards her, it's making his head spin and almost hurt whenever he tries to figure out why or how she has this kind of effect on him.

When she'd fallen asleep on him, he'd momentarily considered carrying her to her bedroom, but then he'd changed his mind, selfishly liking the thought of sharing the sofa with her instead. So he'd adjusted the pillow beneath her head so her neck wouldn't hurt in the morning, had tucked the blanket carefully in around her, and at last, he'd flipped the TV off and made himself comfortable on the sofa beside her.

This unquenchable need to be near her like that, and feel parts of her pressed against him beneath the blanket without actually being able to hold her the way he wanted to, had proven to be some sort of self-inflicted torture in itself, yet one he'd gladly endure any day or night if given the choice again.

After the way she'd asked him to leave, he would greedily take what he could get, even if being with her turned his whole world upside down and made him feel so utterly confused.

He didn't get flustered, he didn't get tongue-tied, and he damn sure didn't get embarrassed like he did around her with anyone else. And if he was being honest with himself, knowing that she had this kind of power over him, it kind of scared him!

X

After Jax leaves, Tara busies herself with cleaning the house. She starts a load of laundry, dusts and wipes everything down, vacuums the whole house, and last but not least mops all the uncarpeted floors throughout too.

Keeping busy around the house however doesn't do much to distract her mind from working overtime, replaying every scenario of what might happen from here.

She also keeps going back over everything that happened the night before and then this morning, not just with Jax, but the confrontations with Emma as well.

To say that she's confused and torn about her feelings is an understatement. There is an obvious and undeniable attraction to Jax. She feels comfortable around him, safe even. She finds herself able to talk to him and open up to him about almost anything without judgment, on top of the tingling skin and butterflies in her stomach his presence also seems to bring forth. The supposed poster child of bad-boys had turned out to be sweet, caring, but also funny last night, and it was just what she'd needed. What she still needs, what she wants. She's had boyfriends before, yet never felt even close to what she's already feeling for him, and they've never even so much as kissed.

But then there was Emma. Her best friend since they were little. Her go-to person, the friend she'd always been able to count on no matter what. The hurt in Emma's eyes earlier has broken Tara's heart. She is so angry with herself that she simply had to send Jax away because she suddenly realized that his presence made her throw caution to the wind. It made her stupid and careless in regard to Em's feelings, but Em's feelings should matter more than some boy she barely knew. Right?

When she finally takes a shower and gets dressed for the day, she's still no better off than before. Her heart is torn in two. She realizes that she has strong feelings for Jax, but she can't help but wonder if repairing her relationship with Emma should matter more? _Shit, this growing up stuff really sucks sometimes!_

She knows that Jax is attracted to her as well, he's made that pretty clear, but with a heavy heart, Tara convinces herself that physical attraction doesn't equal feelings. Not for boys at least. Sexual attraction doesn't equal love, for them one can exist without the other!

With that in mind, she decides to call Emma right then and there, trying to apologize and explain how things have gotten so out of hand, but she's not there, so she leaves a message with her mom instead, asking for a call back as soon as possible.

Hours go by while she waits for Emma to call back, with Tara just watching TV by herself, mindlessly flipping through the channels, a constant frown edged into her face at the thought of how her life got so twisted up lately.

Was it really about Emma and Jax, or was she simply different now that she'd been so viciously attacked in her own home? The memory of that night makes her shiver involuntarily, and then she almost groans to herself when she can't stop herself from wishing Jax was here with her again to distract her from her fears.

When the phone finally rings, Tara rushes to answer it, there's a spark of disappointment though when it's not Emma on the other line, but her father instead. Something came up, a work meeting got pushed back to tomorrow morning, so he won't be home tonight either, and a rush of panic runs through her realizing that she'll really be home alone tonight. She doesn't have Jax's number, but she fights the urge to call Opie to get it.

She knows that she shouldn't, so she doesn't. Instead she leaves one more message with Emma's mom, even though she could've sworn she heard Emma talking in the background, and it nearly made her break down in tears right then and there.

But instead Tara gathers her courage, refusing to falter and call Jax for support, and refusing to let Emma's still cold-shoulder get to her.

Maybe to truly get better, she needs to figure out how to be okay by herself, without either one of them. Without Emma and without Jax, and overcome her fears to find her old independent self again instead.

The plan sounds good in theory, but she still picks up Sue from their friend down the street just a little while later, then checks the lock on every window and door, and at last falls asleep with a big knife lying on her nightstand beside her again. _So much for being brave!_

X

Emma never called her back, and as much as she tries to tell herself that it doesn't matter, she realizes that she's lying to herself. It does matter. They have been friends for far too long, it doesn't make sense that they can't have a talk to figure this whole thing out.

So since she has to work this morning, she makes plans to stop by Emma's house after work to face her in person, in hopes of patching things up with her again.

A little while later Tara steps through the door at Hanna's diner bright and early, ready to start her morning shift for the day. She smiles a fake smile at her boss and her co-workers, not wanting to let on that her heart hurts for so many different reasons, along with the fact that she's practically tossed and turned all night, and has barely gotten any sleep at all.

Tara doesn't let her sadness, nor her fatigue slow her down though. She hurries to take and fill orders, smiles, and chats cheerily with her customers and her co-workers and overall manages to put on a show for everyone around. Refusing to let anyone see past the facade she's put forth so successfully.

It isn't until her friends Rayna, Joe, and Joe's girlfriend Cassidy walk through the door of the diner over five hours later, that her fake smile slips from her face for the first time since she's gotten here. There's a worried, yet also curious expression on their faces, that makes her heart speed up, a bad feeling settling in the pit of her stomach, and she's grateful to have held off on taking her break until now.

She slips through the door that leads them into the deserted alley out back, Rayna, Cassidy and Joe hot on her heels, clearly something pressing on their minds and eager to get a moment alone with her. As soon as the heavy door has fallen shut behind them, Rayna starts to talk, Cassidy chiming in every now and then, but Joe holds back, standing there with his arms crossed in front of his chest, while he just nods along to what the two girls are sharing with her.

Tara's face falls, turning as white as a sheet, and she's starting to feel sick to her stomach as she tries to process what her friends are telling her.

Apparently there had been a party yesterday, at which some gossip about Tara had been brought to her friend's attention. None of them knows where or how the rumor got started though, since all three of them had heard almost the same gossip verbatim from completely different people, but the fact that so many people seem to know about it, made the story sound that much more credible than if it had just been told by one person alone.

Tara sits down on the wooden bench, her whole body is shaking, bracing her elbows on her knees, hiding her face in her hands, while she wills her nerves to settle down again, and fights with everything she has to keep the tears from forming behind her closed eyelids.

This is the last thing she needs right now. She vows to herself that she isn't going to cry, she won't allow herself to fall apart, and let those vicious lies get to her and humiliate her even further. _Fuck them ... fuck them all!_

The rumor that is going around is that she had supposedly spent the night with Jax, doing _the deed_ , and not for the first time either. But for whatever reason, they felt the need to mention that he and Opie had gotten into a fight too. Which had people further speculate now about some sort of _threesome-gone-wrong-turned-love-triangle_ , pointing out that they'd both been fighting about her right there in the middle of her house.

The thing that sticks out the most about the story though, is the fact that nobody even knew about the actual fight between Opie and Jax, only Emma had caught part of it. Which means that it was Emma who'd obviously contributed that part to the lie, giving everyone else even further ammunition to start spreading these false accusations.

That revelation devastates her almost as much as the ugly rumors themselves.

Rayna sits down beside her, rubbing a soothing hand up and down her back to comfort her, while Joe pulls Cassidy into his arms as they both look at her with worried eyes.

Jax and her hooking up could be a possibility, since plenty of people saw them leave the party together, and even though it's nobody's business, she wouldn't feel the need to lie about it if it was actually true.

But the part about her also being involved with Opie, that part is just mean, outrages and downright gross. And her friends, the three of them, know Tara well enough to not even have to ask if the rumors are true.

At that moment it's startling to Tara how much your perception of who your friends truly are can change within a time span of a measly twenty-four hours. _Fuck Emma too!_

"Do you want me to talk to Hanna?" Cassidy volunteers. "I could tell her you're not feeling well, I bet she'll let you go home early."

"No." Tara's head finally snaps up and she meets each of their eyes, one after the other. "I don't wanna leave Hanna hanging, not for something stupid like this."

"Are you sure?" Joe speaks up for the first time.

Tara nods her head. "Yeah, I'm sure. I've only got like less than three hours left anyways, I can make it."

"Thank you guys, for telling me." She stands, and both Cassidy and Rayna embrace her in a group hug, with Joe joining, at last, a few seconds later.

"Of course. You would do the same for us." Rayna answers, and the other two nod in agreement.

X

Never in a million years could Tara have pictured this scenario. And never ever would she have believed that her best friend could contribute to some ugly rumors that are meant to shame her like this.

The hurt she's feeling now is on a whole other level than what she felt the night before. She feels betrayed, deeply betrayed by her closest friend, and it's a very hard pill to swallow.

She powers her way through the next two grueling hours, with her head held high, a smile on her face. She even manages to just roll her eyes and replies with a sarcastic remark at the absurdity of it all, when some guys she recognizes from school dare to ask her which one of the two was better in bed; Jax or Opie?

Tara is tough though, putting on her bravest face yet, and relief's flooding through her when those two guys finally leave, but to her dismay, they not only left her a tip on the table, but also a note with both their phone numbers, and a not so subtle message about wanting to get together with her. _Ewww ... gross!_

She pockets the money, rips the crude note into tiny little shreds, and clears the plates off the table into the bus bin behind the counter, but when the bell above the front door of the diner chimes, she looks up to the incoming customers out of habit and instantly wishes she could disappear into thin air right then and there.

Jax smiles and nods in greeting at one of the other waitresses, working on the other side of the diner, and Tara finds herself holding her breath, hoping he won't notice her and find a place to sit in the opposite direction instead.

But of course, no such luck and instead his eyes roam the place, until they land on her, and Tara quickly averts her eyes, pretending she hasn't seen him and begins to busy herself with wiping down the table in front of her.

"Hey, Knowles." He says, stepping up beside her, smiling at her as he's watching her work. "Busy day?"

"Hey ... you." Tara replies sounding unusually awkward, glancing in his general direction, without actually daring to meet his eyes.

She doesn't answer his question though, ignores him instead. She has no interest in engaging in a conversation with him right now. Not when more people from school could be stepping in through that door at any moment, and would undoubtedly get a kick out of seeing him and her standing here talking.

So she's acting busy as she keeps cleaning and wiping down tables that she's already cleaned before. It's hard to ignore him though, when he's standing close enough that she can actually smell him. The mixture of cigarettes, motor-oil, and his own personal fragrance is emanating from him and filling her nostrils. What makes it even worse is that it isn't an unpleasant smell, she almost wishes it would be though, because that would make him a whole lot easier to ignore.

"When are you getting off work?" He asks next, trying again to get her talking. And she contemplates not replying again, but realizes that that might draw even more attention to them.

"A couple hours." She lies. She's off in less than an hour, but she hopes this answer will make him leave, not willing to wait that long for her.

"Got any plans later?" He asks next, following right behind her as she moves on to the next table over, still trying to look busy, but running out of things to clean and rearrange.

Surely he must've heard the rumors by now too, right? Tara wonders, but then frowns at the thought that those kinds of rumors never affect boys the same as they affect the girls. Whenever someone is rumored to have had sex, _boys are the studs, but the girls are the sluts!_ Everybody knows that.

At that thought she lets out an exasperated sigh, before she finally stops the pretense and stops cleaning just long enough to look up at him. "Please just go, Jax." He frowns now too, even though he raises his eyebrows curiously, but she leans in even closer now before she adds in a low voice. "You being here will only make it worse."

He narrows his eyes at her in confusion now, before he asks in an equally low voice. "I'm making what worse?"

Tara actually focuses solely on his face for a moment, realizing now that he might've really not heard yet. Her voice sounds unusually timid and downright shy when she says. "You haven't heard?"

"Heard what, babe?" Jax gives her yet another clueless look, and when he sees Tara swallow hard, he actually reaches out for her, tugging on her arm. "What the hell is going on?"

Tara glances around the room, making sure her few remaining customers have still full cups, and seem to be content at the moment, before she nods in the direction of the small hallway that leads to the bathrooms, and Jax follows her wordlessly around the corner and out of sight.

They come to stand face to face, and Tara's just about to open her mouth to explain when the door to the men's room opens and a guy she recognizes from the High School basketball team steps into the hallway, giving both of them a curious glance, but smirks and nods at Jax in wordless approval as he passes by.

Jax caught the way it made Tara wince though, and with a tug on the door beside him that reads 'Employees only', he pulls her along with him into the small cleaning closet and quickly shuts the door again behind them. "Talk." He orders her in a whisper, anxious to find out what is going on, and well aware that she doesn't have much time to spare and hide out in here with him.

Tara swallows the newly formed lump in her throat, she's so embarrassed, but pressed on time she decides to get it over with already, when she whispers in reply. "There is a rumor going around."

"What kind of rumor?" He interrupts, eyes still fixated on her.

"That I slept with you ..." Tara presses her lips together for just a fraction of a second, immensely proud with herself that she doesn't blush when she finally adds "... and Opie too."

Tara's not sure exactly how she thought he would react. She almost feared that he'd laugh, brush it off as if it was nothing, after all, these kinds of rumors weren't exactly new to him, and not really as damaging to him as they were for her.

But what she didn't expect is the way he flinches, as if someone had struck him out of the blue when she added the part about being involved with Opie as well.

"Seriously?" He asks grimly. And when Tara simply nods her head in reply, his grim expression changes to downright angry. Not angry with her, but rather for her, and his jaw ticks as he looks down at her and listens, while she goes on to give him the quickest version of what her friends had told her earlier.

"Jesus Christ." He curses under his breath when she's done, closing his eyes as he swipes a hand down his face in obvious disgust.

She's not happy or smiling or anything like that by any means, but she definitely looks a bit relieved, and can't deny the fact that she's glad knowing that he's not amused about it either. Because in Tara's mind it strangely means he's on her side in this. _Doesn't it?_

"I have to go back to work, Jax," Tara says, and he opens his eyes again to meet hers at her words.

"What time do you really get off?" He asks now, as if he just realized that she might've not told him the truth earlier.

Tara glances down at her wristwatch, no time to spare. "In about forty minutes." She admits, even though she's not sure what he'll do with that information.

He gives her a quizzical look, his eyes narrowing at her as he does so. "If I wanted to stick around and wait for you, would you be cool with that?"

Five or ten minutes ago the answer would've been a resounding _no_ , but now things suddenly seem different yet again, and before she knows what she's doing, she's already nodding her head at him. "Yeah, I'm cool with that."

The frown on his face is almost gone again, replaced with the smallest hint of a smile instead. "Cool."

They both step out of the closet then, but just as they shut the door behind them, a group of two girls and two guys walk past them towards the bathroom. The girls keep on walking, engrossed in a conversation amongst themselves.

The guys on the other hand stop short when they realize it's Tara, giving her a scrutinizing gaze from head to toe, yet barely seem to even register Jax behind her. And something about that rubs Jax the wrong way instantly.

Tara tries her best to look unfazed by the obvious way she's being ogled, yet despite her best efforts she can't help the way her cheeks begin to blush in embarrassment now.

But then Jax drapes his arm around her shoulder and practically growls at their gawking schoolmates with a warning. "Either one of you looks at her like that again, I'm gonna assume you want me to fucking end you."

The way they suddenly shy away from her and leave without so much as a sarcastic remark or a knowing grin, makes Tara look up at Jax beside her with both appreciation and awe. Gone is the oddly sensitive boy that read to her, gone it the boy that laughed and joked and flirted with her, and gone is the boy who got a little flustered and even blushed just yesterday morning in her living room, instead he's replaced by this protective _don't-fuck-with-me_ version of him, and even though she's heard of this side of Jackson Teller before, she's never got to witness it up close and personal like this with her own two eyes.

And if she doubted it before, it's in that moment that Tara realizes that Jax is without a doubt not your average run-of-the-mill bad-boy. He seems to be a much more complicated guy than she'd originally thought, with lots of different layers to peel back still, different versions of him to marvel at, but she also realized that she's come to like all those different versions of him so far, each of them for very different reasons.

Jax is completely oblivious to the way Tara's looking at him though, because he's too busy continuing to glare after the two boys disappearing into the bathroom further down the hallway.

He's barely able to contain his fury at the thought of these rumors making the rounds around town. He's learned to grow a tough skin, he can take it, but Tara shouldn't have to. She's already dealt with too much in the last couple of weeks, and he can't stand the thought that she'll be the target of gossip yet all over again.

He's not really sure how he's going to fix this for her, all he knows is he'll fucking try, even if it means beating every sleazy looking guy that gives her the eye to a bloody pulp on her behave.

X

Author's Note: I hope you guys like it. I would love to hear what you think? Thanks for reading.


	10. Absence makes the heart grow fonder

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

Tara has been feeling downright awful since she's found out about the latest rumors, but since then her mood, and the general atmosphere surrounding her, has somewhat improved. Mostly thanks to Jax, who has accompanied her home, and some of her friends, who've all come over after she'd gotten off of work earlier this afternoon, to distract and cheer her up.

She had barely gotten any sleep last night. She'd tossed and turned repeatedly. For one, because she'd found herself alone in her home again with her father still out of town, and two, because she hadn't been able to stop thinking and worrying about her fight with Emma, and her feelings towards Jax and what to do about them.

So naturally, after her sleepless night and after having been on her feet for a long and draining eight-hour shift at the diner, along with the emotional stress about these latest rumors she'd just heard about, she has expected to be dead tired, but as she looks around the smiling and laughing faces of her friends surrounding her on the front porch of her home right now, she's feeling wide awake instead. She's still tormented on what to make of everything, but for the time being, her friends have succeeded in their quest and she's feeling more relaxed than she has in days.

She can't even really fathom how she's gotten from there to here, from that anxiety-laden ugly place where she was feeling hurt, embarrassed and pissed off to now, smiling with her friends despite it all. All she knows is that the old saying might just be true, laughter is in fact the best medicine, and they've been doing that a lot over the last couple of hours.

Her friends did everything they could think of to get her to laugh along with them, and even though she mostly just smiled, it was definite progress from the tears that she'd truly wanted to shed earlier. So she's welcomed the temporary distraction with open arms for the time being.

After she's gotten off work, they've all just lounged around her living room, music videos had been playing nonstop on MTV in the background, and they had raided Tara's kitchen pantry for anything edible, before devouring the pizzas and breadsticks they'd finally ordered from Giovanni's after everyone pitched in a couple of bucks.

But now it is late enough that it is already dark outside when they all decided to head outside after Tara's dad finally made it home from his out of town trip.

James Knowles doesn't mind at all that Tara has friends over at the house, in fact he often mentioned that he preferred it that way, since this way he knew exactly where his daughter was and with whom.

Which meant he didn't have a problem with the group of teenagers to stay a little longer, he did, however, excuse himself to head to bed after his long days of meetings and travel, and Tara did take that as a silent cue that it was probably best to start calling it a night as well.

So here they stand now in front of her home, scattered around her driveway, and despite the late hour, and the slight breeze, it's still warm, almost hot even.

Rayna can't help herself when she catches a glimpse of Tara's dad through the blinds as he goes about the house to turn some of the lights off. She turns towards Tara with a cheeky smirk and winks when she says. "You know, for an old dude, your dad is a total hottie."

"Not that again."Tara groans in reply and rolls her eyes as the rest of them smile and even laugh out loud at Rayna's comment, while even Cassidy turns her head back towards the house to see what caused Rayna's outburst of forbidden admiration.

"I'm serious." Rayna glances back at the house once more herself, but by now Tara's dad is already out of sight again, when she adds. "I'd totally do him." Before she slowly takes another drag from her cigarette, barely able to contain the laugh from spilling out of her at the look of horror that crosses Tara's face.

Tara feigns to stick her finger down her throat, making an exaggerated gagging noise. "Gross, Ray, thanks a lot for that image ... I think I just threw up in my mouth a little."

Tara, along with everyone else, figures that Rayna's just trying to be funny for her benefit, yet she's also well aware of the little crush Rayna's developed for her father since they became friends in seventh grade.

And let's face it, Rayna's not the only one, more than once have friends commented on the fact that James Knowles is _handsome_ or _'a cutie'_ , much to Tara's displeasure, because there's nothing more awkward than having to listen to your girlfriends gushing about your old man.

"I wouldn't because he's your dad." Rayna grins. "Obviously." She adds for good measure.

Still, right now even Tara can't help but smile as the rest of her friends let out yet another laugh at their exchange. If there's one thing she's used to by now, it's Rayna's rather crass way of speaking her mind when she's feeling comfortable with the people around her, which clearly she must be feeling now, considering what she'd just said.

Tino and Jax, to Tara's relief, change the subject when they start to talk about all the upcoming parties happening over the next couple of weeks. There seems to be something going on almost every other night, although a few parties are as far away as Stockton.

The conversation continues, as everyone talks about which party might be worth going to and which ones not so much, and should be avoided. Who's planning to go? When and with whom? And who could possibly drive? But at the end, nothing's written in stone just yet, and they'd all agree to talk about it more later in the week, even though Tara's already decided for herself that she's going to avoid the party scene for the next couple of weeks, not wanting to be the center of unwanted attention.

Not too long after that, her friends start to take off. Rayna catches a ride with Tino, then Joe and Cassidy take off right after them, and before Tara knows it, she finds herself sitting on the concrete step to her small front porch right beside Jax, who's just lit up yet another cigarette and is making no indication that he's planning on leaving soon himself.

They sit quietly for a moment, watching the red taillights disappear down the road and out of sight, while the only sound around them seems to be the never-ending noise coming from the crickets and the cicadas somewhere nearby.

The silence isn't awkward or uncomfortable by any means, it's strangely soothing really. Because even though she finds herself alone with him again, just his presence alone still seems to be enough of a distraction to keep her mind off of everything that has happened over the last couple of days.

He gives her that feeling of _butterflies-in-your-stomach_ , but under the current circumstance she's starting to like it, appreciates it even, because it's a distraction to everything else, and she's silently grateful that the mere proximity of him can do that for her.

Naturally, she is starting to come to terms with the fact that she can no longer deny the way she's starting to see Jax, the way she's already feeling towards him. The way her heartbeat quickens a little just because he's sitting a little close to her as he is right now. Or the way her skin prickles and tingles, leaving goosebumps behind, every time he touches her, and he seems to do that a lot.

She's noticed that Jackson Teller is very touchy-feely, at least he seems to be with her. Small little touches here and there, a hand on her lower back, an arm draped casually around her shoulder, or even the completely innocent way he seems to sit closer than necessary so that his bare arm continuously brushes against hers, like right now while they're sitting here side by side.

She knows she's got it bad for him, there's no denying it any longer, but - yeah, there's always a _but_ \- she's still unsure whether or not she should act on those feelings or not. Whether or not she really believes what Opie had said. _'Jax. He likes you.'_

Wouldn't trying to navigate a new relationship with Jax complicate her life even more right now? Wouldn't it turn everything even more upside down for her, especially considering these new rumors?

She's still struggling with falling victim to a mad man in her own home ... and because of it, she's not thinking straight. She's already struggling to keep her shit together, so it seems downright crazy to willingly add yet another thing to handle on top of it all. Doesn't it?

Jax went from being the hot and somewhat mysterious bad-boy that turned the head of almost every girl she knew, to being so much more to her now. He's somehow become a friend, a true friend she can talk to about the shit that has happened to her, someone to confide in, even a shoulder to cry on, ... and if she's being honest, she's also suddenly scared about losing that friendship with him. Because it turns out, true friends are harder to come by these days.

"Your friends ain't too bad." Jax's suddenly interrupting the silence between them when he speaks up, jostling her out of her own thoughts, and she glances over at him stunt for just a moment, questioning herself and wondering if she might've uttered that last thought out loud by accident. "Rayna and Tino are a little _out there_ , but they ain't bad." He adds, nodding his head in some sort of approval.

"Yeah." Tara nods her head in agreement and smiles, staring down at her own hands, absentmindedly picking the nail polish off of her nails. "They're all pretty cool."

Another silent pause, and Jax exhales a cloud of smoke away from her, but the summer breeze carries it back towards them and he curses and mumbles an apology under his breath, waving his hand around to clear the air surrounding them. Tara can't help but smile a little because of it, even though his sudden movement is disturbing the quiet and comfortable solitude they've found themselves in while sitting here alone.

But when he clears his throat audibly just a moment later, she doesn't realize that it isn't because of the cloud of smoke, but because he's decided to bring up the subject they've purposely avoided all night, until he speaks.

"Look, about those rumors ..." He suddenly starts, pausing while he's looking over at her to catch her turning her head to meet his eyes, his eyebrows raised in question as he's stubbing the finished cigarette out against the concrete beside his sneaker without looking down. "Any idea who started that shit?" He didn't miss the way she just cringed slightly when he brought up this unwelcome topic.

He's well aware that he probably could've asked Tara's friends himself, but nobody else had said a word about that shit all afternoon or evening, he presumed to keep the mood light. So he too, held his tongue for as long as he could, not wanting to be the one to bring it up first, at least not in front of everyone in case it would make Tara feel uncomfortable, which by the look on her face it clearly still does.

Tara swallows hard, her eyes downcast to avoid his gaze again now as she's contemplating for a moment on how to answer that. She's wondering if she should share her suspicions of Emma with him or not. But she knows that if she does, it will only lead to more follow up questions from him, and that would open a whole other can of worms in itself.

About her and Emma. About him and Emma ... and so on, and so forth. _Yeah, she won't go there tonight ... she just can't!_

"I'm not really sure." She finally finds her voice and looks over at him again, to meet his gaze that's been focused on her this whole time in wait for the answer to his question.

It isn't exactly a lie, since she has no actual proof that Emma is, in fact, the one. At least that's what Tara tries to tell herself when she sees the doubtful expression that flickers through Jax's eyes at her noncommittal answer. It's almost scary to think how well he seems to be able to read her after the short amount of time they've spent with each other. If he truly can read her that easily, then ... _well, then she's in much more trouble than she'd thought!_

Tara shakes those thoughts away and ponders about his question again. She could, maybe even should, tell him since this concerns him too, but she decides not to, because even though everything seems to point to Emma as the culprit, if Tara's learned one thing out of these rumors that were spread, it is the fact that not everything is always as it seems.

Maybe she's being stupid to protect Emma, maybe it's just wishful thinking on her part that she's still clinging to that hope that Emma wouldn't do that to her. All she knows is that she's not ready to throw her best friend under the bus just yet, at least not until she has had a chance to confront Em herself.

Tara simply refuses to be a hypocrite who starts rumors herself, without knowing all of the facts, no matter how much she's hurting at the moment because of it.

"Okay," Jax replies nodding after a long moment, as if he's finally giving up on the hope that she'll let him in and speak her mind freely on the subject. But then he adds. "I just want you to know that I'll let everyone know that it's all just a bunch of bull, alright? And Ope will too. Don't worry, babe, it'll blow over before you know it."

Tara just nods, a small smile tugging the corners of her lips up in appreciation at his attempt to console her, even though she doubts that it will really blow over as easy as Jax thinks it will, at least for her. These kinds of rumors seem to stick to girls for much, much longer than their male counterparts.

As if he had just heard her thoughts out loud again, he adds. "You know, there's always some stories making the rounds about me ... whether it's about my family, Samcro, or some girl I supposedly hooked up with ... " Tara holds his gaze, but doesn't comment, just watches on waiting for him to continue, considering in this scenario she's the girl he's _'supposedly hooked up with'_.

But Jax takes his sweet time to continue, raising another cigarette to his lips, taking a few quick drags as he lights it while shielding the flame from the wind by cupping his hand around it. "There'll always be some asshole wanting to stir shit up, ... the best way to deal is to let that shit roll off your back. Don't let 'em get to you."

"That's easy for you to say ..." Tara scoffs quietly in reply, shaking her head to wordlessly dismiss Jax's offer of a cigarette to her after he must've noticed her staring for a little too long at the one hanging from his lips. If it wasn't for the current conversation, she'd be blushing right now. "... you're a guy, but it's different for girls." She adds.

"How so?" Jax quirks an eyebrow at her words, or rather the unspoken meaning behind them, the cigarette on the way to his lips again.

Tara looks at him disbelievingly. Does he really need her to spell it out for him? Isn't it obvious?

She lets out an exasperated sigh before she begins to answer. "You saw what happened at Hanna's, how everyone looked at us. They looked at me like prey, something to toy with, like I'm ... easy or something, while you got admirable looks. I mean, Jesus, I ... I was just waiting for someone to actually clap you on the back or congratulate you with a handshake or some shit, ... you know, for scoring with me."

Despite the sore subject, they both can't help but smirk at her last remark, even if the amusement only lasts for a split second.

Because at the same time he heard how upset it all makes her just by the sound of her voice, so he drapes his arm around her shoulders, trying his best to comfort her. The girl's got a valid point. There is undoubtedly a double standard. "Look, I get it, Knowles, and I guess you're right, it's not the same. But still, no amount of worrying will change a goddamn thing about it. It is what it is."

She glances over at him now, eyeing him wearily for a moment before she can't help but nod in agreement when she ruefully admits. "I know worrying doesn't help it, but it's hard to shut it off ... for me." She lets out a heavy sigh, before she fidgets once more with her fingers, picking at her nail polish again, while she's clearly trying to gather the courage and the right words to continue.

"What?" Jax prompts her to elaborate. But when Tara stays quiet, he waves his hands around them, gesturing to the eerily quiet neighborhood. It's late on a weeknight, so it's not surprising that most of the houses around them have been dark since they stepped out here, and that there hasn't been a single soul in sight, which he quickly points out as well. "It's just the two of us here now, ... you can talk to me."

He playfully nudges her shoulder and smiles down at her, trying to lighten the mood again. "I'm still cheaper than a shrink, remember?"

Tara lets out a little humorless chuckle at his last words, once more reveling in the friendship that has formed so quickly between them, before she gets the courage to admit. "I ... I don't trust people easily, Jax. And I know that probably sounds like bullshit, considering how I spilled my guts to you after barely knowing you, but I swear I'm not usually like that."

She brushes her hair back behind her ears, glancing over at him once more to meet his eyes, but the thoughtful look he's giving her feels like too much, and way too intimate, and so she finds herself focusing her gaze back on her fidgeting hands instead. "I use ... I use facts and evidence to build a case for or against someone, like ... like keeping an internal pros-and-cons list, you know? I can't help it. I can't change it, and honestly, I'm not sure that I would want to, even if I could, because that's my ... my armor, it's the only way I've learned to protect myself. So, me worrying about it, that's all part of that, ... that's my coping mechanism. It's my way of trying to figure out what is what, who I can trust, and how to maneuver around the people that I don't trust, and I guess, ... how to keep them from getting too close."

Jax nods to tell her that he gets it, but he can't help but wonder out loud. "Isn't that tiring though? I mean, aren't you getting tired of always worrying about other people, always trying to keep yourself in check like that?" Yet even as he questions her, he can feel the hypocrisy of his statement burrowing down into his own chest, because he finds himself doing the very same thing more times than he would ever dare to admit. _Look at me mastering the art of deflection!_

"Sure," Tara replies without even having to think about it. Of course she's tired. "It's exhausting." She admits out loud.

"I bet," Jax says, because he knows firsthand that it is.

"But it's even more than that lately." Tara finds the strength to further explain. "Ever since the break-in, it feels like ... I just feel different or something. I'm confused, more cautious in some ways, and not really feeling like myself and ... well, it's messing with my head even more than usual. And I hate it!" _I hate it so much!_

At first Jax isn't sure how to react to that. There are no words that come to mind, and a sudden quiet moment settles between them again as neither of them speaks for a little while, letting Tara's revelation truly sink in.

But then he finds himself looking her over with unabashed scrutiny for much too long. The look he's giving her is inadvertently making Tara want to squirm away from him, but with his arm still draped over her shoulder holding her close, she simply asks instead. "What?"

"You wanna know what I think? ... I think that everything you're feeling is perfectly normal. I also think that you're being way too hard on yourself. You gotta cut yourself some slack. Stop worrying so much about things you had no control over, _have_ no control over, things you can't change, and just let loose a little." He says, sounding more like a twenty-six-year-old man than a sixteen-year-old boy. He's looking over at her all mature, and downright philosophical.

When Tara looks away as she's trying to let his words sink in, he reaches over, tipping her chin up with his hand, forcing her to meet his eyes again, and she can feel those damn butterflies beginning to do somersaults in her stomach at his gentle touch. "Trust me, babe, the only thing wrong with you, is that you think there's something wrong with you."

She holds his gaze for a long silent moment, utterly captivated by the sincerity she can see in his blue eyes when Jax's hand suddenly moves from her chin to gently cup her cheek instead. Right before he leans in closer to kiss her.

X

 _The next afternoon_

Emma had called Hanna's diner right after Tara had gotten there bright and early this morning, to ask if it would be okay if she stopped by later on, so they could talk. Needless to say, Tara readily agreed, vowing to hold off on her break until then.

But as the minutes seem to tick away in slow motion, Tara wondered why she didn't feel more relieved that her former best friend had finally reached out to her after days of giving her the silent treatment. She had felt more nervous than she'd like to admit, but not relieved at all, ... and she didn't like it one bit.

But still, every time the door opened and the little bell above it chimed throughout the place to announce someone's arrival, Tara's eyes would instantly snap to the front door more quickly than usual to see if it was Em. She was anxious for Emma to show her face, but she was most anxious to finally get this over with, and maybe, hopefully, even find out the truth in the process, however ugly it might be.

So here she stood now in the back alley behind the diner, face to face with her gorgeous blond friend, arms crossed in front of her, mimicking each other's awkward stance to a T, the way only friends could.

They stare at each other with tears shimmering in both their eyes, threatening to fall yet again at any moment, a painful expression showing openly on their faces, unable to conceal their heartbreak any longer as they're pondering over everything they've just said and shared with one another.

Emma was not the one who'd spread the rumors about Tara, Jax and Opie. Tara knew that now.

She did however admit to having cried and poured her heart out to some of their other friends on the cheer team about what she'd stumbled in on at Tara's place that morning, which she believes had ultimately led to the rumors being started. And she had not only apologized for that profusely, but vowed that she'd set the record straight, back Tara's, Jax's and Opie's claim that nothing had happened, and tell everyone that the rumors simply weren't true.

In turn, she finally gave Tara the chance to explain her side of the story. From her time spent with Jax in the woods at the party in Lodi, to him spending the night with her, up to their awkward encounter the morning after.

She reassured Emma that nothing had actually happened between Jax and her. That he'd simply been a friend to her, a good friend, and a shoulder to cry on, but nothing more. And Emma finally believed her.

She didn't mention the almost kiss though, she just can't, not now ... and besides _almost doesn't count!_ At least that is how Tara justifies leaving out that part of the truths she's shared today.

Kiss or no kiss, the whole truth or not, the damage to their friendship was already done.

Even after their confessions and explanations, they both realized things weren't the same anymore. Something has shifted between them, something has broken, and they both know it. And if they were both being honest with each other, they knew that it wasn't even so much about the whole Jax drama, but this has been a long time coming, and this latest fight had simply been the last straw, so to speak.

It felt weird and sad, and very much like a break up of sorts, standing here, speechless, waiting for the other to speak first.

"Okay then -" Emma starts, but stops when her voice breaks on the words, sighing deeply and fanning her face to avoid crying again, before she finally tries to speak once more after a few deep breaths. "Maybe ... I'll see you around, you know."

"Yeah, okay." Tara concedes, holding back her own tears. "Maybe." She manages to choke out in reply. They would obviously run into each other somewhere sooner or later, and they both knew it.

And then it was over, just like that.

Tara watches as her former best friend gives her one last awkward wave over her shoulder and then walks down the alley away from her, obviously to avoid any awkward glances she'd surely receive due to her tear-streaked face if she'd walk back through the diner itself.

When Emma is finally out of sight, Tara takes a few deep cleansing breaths herself, uses the apron of her uniform to wipe at her face, drying up her tears that have spilled after all, before she straightens her spine, musters up the last bit of strength she's got left, and at last returns back to work to finish up the rest of her shift. Like her heart hadn't just cracked a little.

X

 _Five days later_

Jax has done countless oil changes since he started working here at T-M a little over a year ago, so much so that he could probably do them by now with his eyes closed. He's simply going through the motions, his hands working away as if on autopilot. So it's no surprise that his mind is elsewhere the entire time he's been tasked to do one oil change after another today.

All he can think about is Tara. _Tara. Tara. Tara._

And what he could've done wrong that would have her trying to avoid him. The more he thinks about it, thinks about her, the more it is beginning to drive him insane.

Was she avoiding him because he had almost kissed her a week ago? If she hadn't pulled away from him at the last second, his lips would've been firmly planted on hers, that's for damn sure.

By her reaction that night, she'd clearly not been ready for that kiss, and Jax had chalked up her rejection to simply bad timing on his part, nothing more. She wasn't ready yet, but that's okay with him, because he would wait until she is. Simple as that.

But now he wondered if there was more to it than that. Why was it that she was completely trying to avoid one on one time with him?

He simply didn't know if it was all about that almost kiss, or if it was about something else entirely, mostly because he didn't know how she actually felt about him. And the not knowing was seriously beginning to mess with his head.

He hadn't been seeking her out every day in the last five days, but every time that he had, every time he'd shown his face at the diner or at her house, she'd come up with some kind of excuse why she couldn't be spending time with him.

She was tired and not feeling well, or she had to babysit a neighbors kid.

It was ridiculous, really, but what was beginning to be even more ridiculous was the way he still kept showing up, like some kind of idiot who didn't get the glaringly obvious message the previous rejection around.

Some might argue that his continued pursuit of her was more about his bruised ego than actually wanting to be with her, but Jax knew for a fact that that wasn't the case at all. He wanted Tara, in any way, shape or form, plain and simple, and now that he was sure of his feelings, he wasn't going to give up that easily.

And besides, it wasn't like he'd never been rejected by a girl before. It turns out that despite his charm and good looks, it has happened on occasion. A bad-boy with his obvious connections to Samcro was apparently not everyone's type. Some chicks simply weren't into all that. _Who knew?_ But hey, no harm, no foul.

But this thing with Tara was a different story. It fucking stung, mostly because he didn't understand it, and he hadn't seen it coming ... at all. He'd been under the impression they were getting closer, they were building towards being more than just friends, but apparently, he must've been fucking reading the signs all wrong.

And to make matters worse, she had still shown up the three times they'd all made plans as a group. With his friends, and her friends, Tara was game. As long as it wasn't just him and her hanging out alone, she was apparently all in! And to add salt to the wound, she was fucking perfection when she'd shown up. She was all smiles, nice and sweet, dressed to turn heads, funny and acting perfectly normal ... around him, around them, around everyone, really. Like everything was normal between them, like she hadn't repeatedly shot him down this week without a real and legit explanation, and had barely been able to look him in the eye when she crushed his heart!

Opie, ever the helpful friend, had of course chimed in with a theory of his own. He'd said that her behavior wasn't really about him, but more about the rumors she was still trying to live down. And yeah, he could see how she might be thinking along those lines. Being seen alone with him would undoubtedly fuel that shit like kerosene to fire, so it could make sense that she was trying to avoid that.

But if that was, in fact, the case, why wouldn't she just say that to him? Why make up bullshit excuses, instead of simply telling him that she wants to keep some distance for a while, until those rumors die down some more?

But she hadn't said any of those things. Nope, she'd just turned him down cold!

With that last thought still roaming through his mind, Jax shoves the greasy rag he had just wiped his hands with back into his back pocket, before he closes the hood of the car he'd been working on with much more force than was necessary. The evil eye his mother sends his way lets him know that she doesn't approve at all, not his abuse of a paying customer's car, nor his attitude. _Too bad, mom!_

He lets out a sigh of relief when he realizes that he's finally done for the day, and begins gathering his tools to put away.

"Time to get the fuck out of here." He mumbles to Opie under his breath, giving his mother a wide berth to avoid another 'pep talk', before he hurriedly leaves the lot shortly after.

X

 _Later that day_

It's not even dark out yet when Tara's friend Joe pulls his car onto the field across the street from the house to park. Joe and Cassidy have talked her into this, into coming here, convincing her that she needed to show her face again sooner or later. That she couldn't spend the rest of the summer like some hermit, avoiding all the parties they'd all looked forward to during the school year.

But now, as she lets her eyes take in the scene around them, and as she watches people park and pile into the house, with the music already blaring obnoxiously loud, she can't help but wonder for a moment if coming here tonight is a mistake after all. A shiver of anxiety runs through her as her thoughts begin to stray to the obvious. _Would someone bring up the rumors to her here? Would she get hit on by some creep for the wrong reasons, because they thought she was easy?_

Pushing those thoughts back as far as she can, she quietly follows behind Joe and Cassidy toward the house, working their way through the parked cars. The house belongs to the parents of a friend of a friend of a friend of Joe's, or something like that, and the sheer size of it is downright ridiculous. Who has the kind of money, to build a home of these proportions, and out in the middle of nowhere of all places, Tara wonders to herself as she takes it all in.

"You okay?" Cassidy asks looking back at her over her shoulder as they take the steps up onto the front porch.

"Yeah, sure," Tara replies, trying her best to sound genuine, as they step through the wide-open front door and she follows her friends further into the already much too crowded home. _This is crazy, there must be at least a hundred people here already._

Rap music is blaring through the speakers in every room she passes through. Red solo cups are already scattered everywhere as well, and before she knows it, she's already lost sight of both Joe and Cassidy in the crowd.

But undeterred, Tara ventures on alone, and ends up finding three, yes three, big kegs set up in the middle of the kitchen, along with alcohol bottles of the more hardcore variety filling the corner of the kitchen counter as well.

She shakes her head as she takes it all in, even though her mind isn't truly here right now. It's on Jax, and the fact that he hasn't come to see her today after he got off work. She hates knowing that she has no one other but herself to blame for that. _Isn't that what you wanted? For him to finally back off?_ The voice inside her head questions her resolve to let him go.

A week ago Jax had almost kissed her. She had almost allowed him to kiss her, but at the very last second, she'd come to her senses and pulled away. She had to stop it, she knows she just had to, she was not in the right headspace at all to allow herself to go there.

And the moments that followed had been awkward and embarrassing for her, but Jax was sweet and understanding and tried his best to not show his disappointment, or make her feel bad when she said it was getting late, and she should probably head inside to get some sleep.

And of course fate would have it that just the very next day, Emma would reach out to her to talk. So they had talked, they had cried, and they had simply called it a truce, when they both realized that their relationship would never be the same again from here on out.

It was that same day though, that Tara realized that she couldn't let this thing with Jax develop into more than friendship. With the rumors still fresh on everyone's tongue and mind, along with the rift between Emma and herself beyond repair, she simply knew something needed to change. Everything was getting to her, and maybe she needed to change.

Tara had feelings for Jax, strong feelings, but being around him, or even entertaining the idea of being with him, wanting him the way she wanted him, it was stirring up too much guilt in her. This guilt, combined with everything else she was going through, was just too much. She simply wasn't sure where she'd find the strength to handle it all, so something had to give.

So she did what she thought was right. She made up excuse after excuse to not find herself in yet another situation that could possibly end up with his lips on hers, or vice versa. She kept telling herself that it was the right thing to do. That she wasn't in the right mind frame to allow herself to be with him, but deep down she couldn't help but hate herself for it.

Most of all, she hated to be the cause for the confused and hurt expression she'd seen in Jax's eyes after she'd rejected his plans to hang out time and again. He'd been nothing but good to her, he didn't deserve any of this, and it made her feel like such a bitch ... _ugh!_

Even though Tara would like nothing more than to drown out her recurring thoughts of Jax, she still finds herself hesitating for a long contemplating moment in the doorway of the kitchen, while her eyes roam over the various alcoholic options that are available to her tonight.

But at last she gives in, the alcohol beckoning her, and before long she's roaming mindlessly around the house, trying to find her friends again, with a full red cup in hand that has already been filled for the second time with cheap keg beer. _Aren't I a chip off of the old block? Daddy Knowles would not approve._

"Hey, Tara?" A vaguely familiar voice booms above the music and she turns her head mid-sip from her cup, trying to find the owner of the voice, when at last her eyes land on Tyler, who is fighting his way through the crowd towards her.

Tyler Mason, a fellow Junior of Charming High, greets her with a genuinely friendly smile and a one-armed hug, since he too, is holding a drink of his own, before he tries his best to strike up a conversation over the loud music around them.

Tara knows Tyler from school and remembers that he's never been anything but nice to her in the past. Truthfully, she's glad to have run into a friendly face here, and for the first time since she's gotten here, she can practically feel herself relaxing a little because of him.

She's not looking to start anything with anyone tonight. That isn't why she's here at all. But maybe spending some time with Tyler is just the sort of distraction she needs to get through this party without her mind going back to the break-in, the rumors, and Jax, all night long.

The irony is not lost on her though, when it is in fact Jax's voice that she hears, telling her to not be so hard on herself, and to _'just let loose a little'_. _Hell, it's worth a shot!_

X

 _Later that night_

Freshly showered, changed into clean clothes, he finds himself riding shotgun with Ope on his way out of Charming. His hair still a little damp and slicked back, his cigarette hanging from his lips, and his mind - of course - back on Tara the entire length of the ride. He truly wishes he could stop obsessing about her, but he just ... _he can't!_

For the sake of his pride though, he hadn't gone to see her today after he'd gotten off work. He hadn't stopped at the diner. Hadn't stopped at her house. Hadn't even tried to call her either.

But now, as he patiently waits for Opie to park the truck on the open grassy field across from the house where the party is being held tonight, he's starting to second guess himself.

"You need to cut that shit out, bro." Opie cuts into Jax's thoughts in the same instant he finally cuts the engine. "At least while we're at this goddamn party tonight."

"Cut what out?" Jax replies, jumping out of the truck without taking his gaze off of his friend.

"The moping, the daydreaming, the second-guessing, ... take your pick." Opie answers him as he rounds the front of his father's truck and falls in step alongside Jax, before he adds. "You did the right thing by giving her some breathing room. What's that saying? Absence makes the heart grow fonder, or some shit?"

"Yeah," Jax responds begrudgingly. "Or some shit." And lights yet another cigarette as they weave through the maze of parked vehicles on their way towards the house.

X

Author's Note: I'm really curious to hear what you all think of this. So if you have a minute to spare, leave me a few words, please. Thank you.


	11. Tara Knowles is off limits

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

Jax casually sits on the wooden railing that's framing in the large back-porch of this goddamn mansion out here in the middle of nowhere. His back's leaning against the beam, a lit cigarette carelessly hanging from the corner of his mouth, a red solo cup in hand that he's been slowly sipping from, and his head slightly bobbing along to the beat of the music.

All in all he looks comfortable, at the very least giving the impression he might not hate being here, even though at the moment he actually really does hate it, and he knows it is all _her_ damn fault. The gorgeous, smart, and oh-so fucking stubborn girl he can't stop thinking about, who seems to be holding his heart, dick and balls in a vice grip without even knowing it nor does she seem to give a damn about the voodoo spell she's somehow brought upon him. _Tara fucking Knowles._

At least he's starting to believe that's the explanation for his current irritated state, what else could it be, because there are plenty of hot chicks that keep giving him the eye, one of which he's all too familiar with is glued to his side already, obviously hoping to rekindle their relationship again, and he knows this, yet he honestly couldn't care any less at the moment.

Instead here he sits feeling utterly alone, because the one girl he wants, the one girl he can't get out of his damn head, isn't here, not that she would want to have anything to do with him even if she was here. And the more he thinks about all that, relives the events of the last couple of weeks, the more pissed off he seems to get with every passing second, because nothing about any of that makes a lick of sense to him. Had he read her all wrong? Is the connection he feels with her all in his head? _Does she really not feel what he feels?_

His glance drifts down to the pretty blond beside him, at Amy, his ex, who's leaning against the railing he's perched upon. She's repeatedly looking up at him and trying so very hard to engage him in a conversation, one he honestly has no interest in having, but good ol' Amy doesn't seem to get the hint that he isn't the least bit interested anymore. Can't blame her though, not really, since this back and forth shit has been their style over God knows how many months. 

He's trying his best to block out her overly flirty voice she's using just for him, and the way she keeps tugging down her already skimpy tank top to reveal more cleavage than necessary, all the things that would normally amuse him, boost his ego even, yet tonight they just seem to annoy the piss out of him. So much so that he even wonders for a moment what has ever attracted him to her in the first place, because for the life of him he can't remember anymore, so he finds himself instead focusing his attention on overlooking the surrounding festivities in the backyard, and giving her the cold shoulder in the process.

Even with the air conditioner running, the house must've gotten too hot with that many people before he'd even gotten here, so most of the party guests have drifted into the cooler air outside instead. It's already pretty late and dark out, but with the generous amount of lights strung up every which way out here, it's still fairly easy to see once your eyes have adjusted to the dimmer lighting.

He takes a drag of his cigarette, letting his eyes roam across the make-shift dance floor before him, watching the sweaty and drunk bodies groping and grinding against each other with the beat of the music that's blaring through the speakers. Almost wishing anything or anyone would spark his interest, so he could find a way to forget about the girl that doesn't want him the way he wants her, but deep down he knows it's a pointless wish.

He glances over at Opie downing a shot with some friends on the other side of the porch, before he looks down into his own almost empty cup, making a mental note to pace himself with his beer, knowing he should probably only have one more after this because he has graciously agreed to be the designated driver tonight, since Opie's on his way to getting shit-faced in an apparent attempt to nurse his very own aching heart. Who knew Opie's been miserable this whole time too? That fucker's always been big on listening and doting out unsolicited advice, yet never talks about his own shit unless you really press him on it, so he sure as shit didn't know something was eating at Ope until they got here tonight. _That revelation came straight out of left field._

Come to find out that the real reason why Opie dragged his grumpy ass out here tonight was all about Ope hoping to run into that girl he'd met at Lodi lake again, Donna. Well, needless to say Donna isn't here after all, and neither are any of her friends Ope met that night, and Opie's messed up about it and currently tries drinking and smoking his feelings away. _Been there, done that, brother, ... it won't solve shit!_

As much shit as his best friend has been giving him about his sudden obsession with Tara, after tonight Jax has slowly come to realize that Opie's no better off himself, the only difference between the two is that Ope apparently is not as vocal about his internal misery, but is miserable just the same.

But can he really blame Opie for keeping it close to the vest? After all, there's truly nothing more pathetic than two guys crying in their beers over some fucking chicks. So yeah, there's definitely a line, and they've silently vowed not to cross it. There can only be one man crying at a time here, and tonight - for once - it's been decided that it's Opie's fucking turn.

On the bright side, at least now Jax knows that his best friend has got it just as bad for this mystery girl from the lake party, whose number and last name he'd, unfortunately, failed to get, ... hence the desperate, but ultimately shattered hope to run into her here tonight, so they can share in each other's misery. And even though he feels shitty for even thinking so, in a messed up way Jax kind of likes the fact that he isn't the only pussy whipped dumbass here tonight, hopelessly pining after some unattainable girl. _Misery does love company!_

"Dance with me, Jax." Amy's winy plea interrupts his thoughts when she starts tugging on his arm to gain his full attention.

Amy has been his on-again-off-again girlfriend. He's truly lost count how many times they've split up, just to eventually hook up again at some party they're both attending. Which is the reason why he can't really fault her for obviously thinking tonight wouldn't be any different than all those other times before. It's become somewhat of a pattern for them, like some bad habit you can't seem to break even though you know it's leading absolutely nowhere good in the end.

Unlike him though, Amy hasn't realized yet that things have drastically changed this time around, for him at least. He never knew he could feel for a girl the way that he does feel for Tara. The way he feels about her is just different, it's all-consuming, and frustrating and confusing as hell. It's new, truly a first for him, but now that he knows it's out there, this kind of undeniable attraction and feelings of possessiveness, why the fuck would he ever go back and settle for something mediocre like what he'd had with Amy and the likes. He can't. He won't. 

It's not Amy's fault he's turned into such a pussy though, so he tries to be nice, even gives her the smallest hint of a smile when he replies with a simple shake of his head. "Not really feeling like dancing tonight, darlin'." Hoping she's able to read between the lines, but highly doubts that she will.

Amy smiles widely while she studies him for a long moment, overjoyed to have gotten even this minuscule amount of attention from him just now, before her smile turns into a salacious grin just a few seconds later when some kind of idea seems to have come to her. 

She steps even closer into him and before he can stop her she has snaked her hands up his arm and chest until she's linked them both behind his neck, invading his personal space as if they were actually still a couple. "Well, what do you feel like doing, Jax?" She asks, the innuendo clear as day in the tone of her voice and the expression on her face.

But when Jax doesn't answer right away and just looks down at her with an obviously surprised expression at her forwardness instead, she proceeds to lean up on her tiptoes and whispers in his ear. "I've heard there's plenty of bedrooms upstairs, we could spend some time alone." 

At that, Jax clears his throat with a little cough, throwing the stub of his smoke into his almost empty cup, hearing the unmistakable hiss as it goes out, right before she catches him off guard and actually manages to pull him down from where he's been sitting. He comes to a stand on his own two feet right in front of her, and against his better judgment, her words, action's and the way she's pressing the full length of her body up against him is causing him to actually smirk and let out a little laugh at her eagerness to be with him. _Who is he kidding? After Tara's repeated rejections, his ego and other parts are clearly desperate for some stroking after all!_

"What do you say, Jax?" She asks, grinning triumphantly up at him now that she's got him to smile and laugh for the first time, and as he ponders his options he can't help but be assaulted with an all too detailed replay of some of the previous intimate moments that have taken place between Amy and himself for just a second.

After all, she is a very pretty girl and under all his brooding bad-boy bravado, he's still a hot-blooded teenage boy more than ready to sow his wild oats, so at this point in his life, his reaction to her is downright involuntarily and shouldn't necessarily be held against him. _Right?_

Over the months they've done plenty of _fooling around_ with each other, with the glaring exception of one very crucial step. Yeah, you know, ... _the one!_

Despite the _easy_ vibe she likes to give, Amy's anything but easy. She's been holding out on him, wanting to wait, wanting _it_ to be _special_. And even though he's no choirboy per se, he isn't the kind of asshole that would try to talk a girl into something she isn't ready for just yet either, especially when he could've easily gotten it someplace else if he'd truly wanted to.

But he didn't do that, he hadn't gone and gotten _it_ somewhere else either, not even during their break-ups, which come to think of is a whole other matter he should probably have his fucked up head examined over sooner rather than later.

For whatever reason, some advice he's gotten a while back from Kevin, another T-M mechanic who is just a few years older than him, suddenly comes back to mind.

 _'You gotta watch out for the chicks that don't sleep with you, man. You know what it means? It means they like you. Like -like you- like you. Like -love you- like you. And they keep holding back, because they're so into you, and they're just waiting for you to finally realize how much you're into them too. So that when you do end up having sex with them for the first time, you're not just fucking but you're making love or some shit. And it'll actually feel like that too, because they've been making you wait so long for a little action, that when you finally get some, it'll feel like some out-of-this-world connecting-with-each-other thing, which makes you believe that you might actually love her. I swear it's some form of brainwashing of your dick or something. I'm telling you, man, chicks that are all over you but don't actually put out, ... run the other way, dude. Fucking run!'_

He'd just chalked it up to Kevin liking to hear himself talk, but now that he finds himself looking down into Amy's expecting and hopeful eyes, he's beginning to wonder whether or not there is actually some merit to the guy's unsolicited words of questionable wisdom. Amy definitely likes him a hell of a lot more than he likes her back, he knows that for a fact since it's been usually him who did the breaking-up, and she'd be the one who'd ask him to get back together again. Never the other way around, not even once in all this time!

And as much as he has enjoyed his hot and heavy make-out sessions with Amy at the time, in hindsight not one of those moments with Amy's hands wrapped around his dick comes even close to the way he has felt simply holding Tara's hand that night they were running from the cops, or talking and laughing with her while sharing fries, or even reading the ending of some fucked up book to her, or sitting beside her with just his arm draped around her. _Shit, and he's never even so much as kissed Tara, ... if that revelation isn't fucking eye-opening, he doesn't know what is._

His eyes connect with Opie's over the top of Amy's blond head of hair, just for a couple of seconds, but it's long enough to see his best friend shake his head at him in disapproval. He honestly didn't need to know Ope's opinion to realize what he obviously should do here, because he's already come to that conclusion all on his own when his mind keeps on drifting back to Tara even now. The choice is clear as day!

So he clears his throat again as he puts his cup down on the railing, then looks back down to meet her eyes and reaches up for her hands that are wrapped around his neck, slowly but gently pulling them down and away from him.

"Sorry." It's all he says shaking his head in refusal, and it's all he really has to say for her to get the hint this time, because his facial expression along with the way he takes a step away from her really tells Amy all she needs to know. And for a moment he actually feels bad for her when he sees the hurt and humiliated expression that crosses her pretty face. _Is this how pitiful I looked every time Tara turned me down about hanging out?_ He can't help but wonder.

It takes her a few seconds to recoup from what has just happened, his rejection clearly stings, but then she folds her arms in front of herself, and juts her chin up at him in a challenge Jax honestly hasn't anticipated from her at all. Although he should've figured it wouldn't be this easy, considering he'd never actually turned her down like this before.

She steps a little closer again to close the gap he's just created, her voice is just barely loud enough for him to hear when she speaks this time, and it makes it clear she doesn't want to draw unwanted attention nor cause a scene, which is something he's always appreciated about her in the past, yet she still expects him to answer her nonetheless. "I don't understand. What are you saying? What the hell is going on?"

Jax sighs deeply, swiping his hand down his face, because _fuck_ if he wouldn't like to ask those same questions himself, just with a very different girl at the receiving end of them. His voice is equally low, giving her the same courtesy of not drawing the attention of witnesses for what he needs to tell her. "I think ... it's _really_ over this time, Amy. This thing with us ..." He pauses for effect and gestures with his hand from her to him and back again to bring more emphasis to his words. "It's not working, and we shouldn't ... we can't keep doing this. I'm sorry." He adds the last more for her benefit, because he's not really sorry that this thing between them is finally really coming to an end. Even if Tara wasn't in the picture, this has been a long time coming.

"Is this about that girl that goes to your school?" She asks without missing a beat, searching his eyes as if she could read the answer there already. "That cheerleader? Tara? I heard some stuff."

He should've expected that those goddamn rumors would find their way all the way to Amy's ears considering their history, but the question in regards to Tara still catches him off guard somehow.

He finally shakes his head at Amy, remembering his promise to Tara to set the record straight whenever the subject would come up. "Whatever you've heard, that shit ain't true. Absolutely nothing happened. I swear."

"Okay." Amy doesn't question the truth behind his denial, another thing he can appreciate, but by the way her eyebrows furrowed in confusion, and the way she's waiting for him to say something more to explain further, it's obvious she still doesn't understand what is happening here. She doesn't get why their break up is different this time around.

So he feels the need to further explain, because Amy does deserve some clarity here, he owes her at least that much after all this time. They've been stringing each other along for far too long, and with his sights so clearly set on Tara now, it's time to cut her loose once and for all, so that hopefully she can move on as well.

"Look, the truth is that Tara and I are just friends, and nothing has happened between her and I ... _yet._ " He catches the twitch in her jaw at the last word, before he adds further. "But you should know that I want to be more than friends with her. I like her. I like her a lot." There, the truth at last, and it's strange how good it feels to actually admit those words out loud to someone other than Opie.

Amy's eyes widen in disbelief, and she raises her hand to her mouth to absentmindedly bite her nail while she shakes her head ever so slightly as if she can't possibly comprehend what he's just shared with her. It's obvious by her reaction that she hasn't anticipated something like this from him at all. She's blindsided.

"So let me get this straight." She braces her hands on her hips now in some kind of stand-off, yet looks up at him with searching eyes when she questions him in that same quiet voice as she did before. "You're turning me down, and you're really - I mean _really_ \- ending things with us this time for some ... some girl that's -."

But then she abruptly stops and doesn't finish the sentence as if she's suddenly thought better of it, and instead she swiftly averts her eyes from his and shakes her head to herself, before she mumbles so quietly under her breath that he almost doesn't hear her over the music. "Oh my God, ... I can't ... I can't believe this is happening." The pain in her voice is evident, and for a second Jax fears she might actually cry, and then he's silently thankful when she doesn't.

But there is something about what she said right before, or rather what she didn't say that stuck out to him and rubs him the wrong way, and before he can stop himself, he's already blurting out the question. "I'm ending things for a girl that's ... what? What were you gonna say?"

At that, Amy actually scoffs, shaking her head at him again, but the hurt look that flashed in her blue eyes just moments ago has now morphed into one of pity when she whispers. "Trust me, Jax, you don't wanna know." She seems almost stoic now as she suddenly turns away from him without another word and tries to simply walk away without giving him so much as another glance either.

But Jax is quicker, grabs her by her arm, and spins her back around before she even knows what's happening. His interest is peaked as his whole being filled with dread his mind can't make sense of just yet. "Hold up ... what the hell are you talking about? What don't I wanna know?" 

She glances up at him for another drawn-out moment, as if she's actually contemplating whether to tell him or not, but at last she falters. "That girl, Tara, she's here, at this party." She finally says, but then a rueful expression flickers in her eyes when she adds. "I saw her, looking pretty cozy with some other guy."

Jax lets go of her arm so quickly as if he'd just been burnt, unable to hide the shocked look from his face about what she's just said. His knee jerk reaction at first is wanting to accuse Amy of lying out of spite, but the look in her eyes tells him she's telling the truth, and the pissed-off mood he's been in most of the night is nothing compared to the anger that rushes through him now. _Turning him down over and over, then showing up here with someone else? Tara fucking Knowles! How dare she make a fool out of him like this?_

"Where?" He grinds out the one-word question at Amy, whose suddenly worried expression only seems to irritate him even that much further. He knows she's not out here in the backyard someplace, because he would've noticed her in a heartbeat, so that only leaves somewhere inside. 

"I don't know," Amy answers at first, stepping into him again and reaching out to try to calm him now, but Jax steps out of her grasp, yet his eyes imploring her to get on with it, to answer him, and to do so quickly. "I saw them earlier by the kitchen when I first got here, but I haven't seen them since. They might've left already." 

_Them! They!_ As if she's talking about a couple. The words she's using grate at him and before he knows it he's already shuffling past her, ignoring her quiet pleading and shaking off her hands that are trying to clutch his arm, along with Opie's confused expression directed at him as he's walking past to head back inside at once in search of her. _Or them._

If Tara really is here somewhere, he's going to find her and he's going to put her on the spot about what's happening between them. Before tonight is over, he'll know where she stands in regards to being more than just friends with him, even if it's the last thing he's gonna do.

The music is still playing a little loud much like before, but the main lights in the house have been dimmed now, with just some small lamps here and there scattered throughout, lighting up the way from one room to the next, and there are plenty of them to get lost in.

It's giving the party inside the same intimate vibe as the string lights hung above the backyard have provided outside. Even the bumping and grinding of bodies are the same, and at the moment it's just one more thing that has him slowly losing his grip on sanity as he carefully studies every couple he passes for a sign of her. But the relief that's rushing through him, every time a brunette in the arms of some guy turns out to not be her, is short-lived the further he ventures about without finding her. 

Is this what having feelings for someone does to you? Is this what falling in love with someone feels like? Well, if it is, it's fucking bullshit, and he doesn't want any part of it. Maybe Shakespeare had it right all along, love does truly suck ass after all!

He scours the downstairs for her, going from room to room and back again, leaving not a single door unopened, but to no avail. And even though he can practically feel the bile rising in his throat at the mere thought that she might be upstairs in one of the bedrooms Amy has tried to lure him into, he can't stop his feet from making their ascent up the winding staircase even if he tried.

Maybe this is what he needs to see to get her out of his head again? To get rid of these fucking feelings for her. Maybe in the end this is for the best? He tries to convince himself of that, but before he's even halfway up the stairs, he freezes in place, and thank fuck that for once the song that's playing right now is some kind of slow romantic shit or he wouldn't have even been able to hear her.

There is no question though that it's her, it is the unmistakable laugh of hers that he's come to fucking love, but at the moment he also loathes it because it's most likely directed at the douche-bag she's with tonight. The only bright side in all this is the fact that the sound is coming from behind him, from downstairs, and not _get-laid-central_ , otherwise known as the countless bedrooms upstairs. _Thank God!_

Jax turns around at once and hurries back down much more eager now than he was going up, a man on a mission taking two steps at a time as he tries to follow the sound, when he realizes that something seems off about her laugh and her voice, but he can't put his finger on it just yet. At least not until he reaches the bottom of the stairs and rounds the corner into one of the rooms, where he finally finds her at last and gets a good look at her for the first time tonight.

He knows for a fact that he's walked through this room looking for her and she hadn't been here, but she sure as shit is now, and true to Amy's word, she's really not alone, and the sight knocks the breath out of him for a split second. There she is, sitting on a loveseat next to some guy, the guy's arm draped around her over the top of the sofa, his whole body curled towards hers, his other hand on her thigh, sitting way too damn close and looking way too damn comfortable with each other while they're talking about God knows what.

The dude's leaning into her even more, brushing her hair aside, his mouth near her ear as he's saying something to her while also burying his face into the crook of her neck. But what bothers Jax, even more, is the reason her voice sounds different, which is clear by the expression on Tara's face, or more precisely the look in her eyes that tells him she's three sheets to the wind already. No doubt about it now that he can see her. 

And in that instant, for whatever reason the anger he'd felt directed towards her starts to simmer down significantly, and gets nearly wholeheartedly redirected at her date instead, who - unlike her - still looks suspiciously sober. _Did this asshole get her drunk?_

Tara hasn't looked up from her cup, hasn't even seen him yet and before Jax can fully assess the situation and let his presence be known, the guy she's with turns away from her to reach for his own drink on the table, then meets Jax's eyes over the rim of his cup and smiles, and to Jax's shock, he realizes that he knows this prick. 

The douche-bag hanging all over Tara is none other than Tyler Mason, a fellow classmate from Charming High, and worst of all, one of his fellow teammates from the baseball team. Instantly Jax's mind floods with bits and pieces of all the too detailed stories he's overheard this guy share in the locker-room about his conquests, and the thought that Tara's name could come up in the future has his stomach twisting in knots at once and his blood boiling anew. _This piece of shit!_

"Hey, Teller. What's up, man?" Tyler greets him sounding much too cheery, even leans forward, and reaches out to him for some kind of a bro handshake. 

"Mason," Jax replies simply, and within that split second realizes that he's got a decision to make about how he's going to handle this situation, considering there are too many eyes and ears around to bear witness to what he really wants to do. 

What he wants to do is beat the shit out of Tyler and then throw Tara over his shoulder and get her the hell out of here. But because of those goddamn rumors, he won't do either of those things solely for Tara's benefit. He can't make a scene, not here at least with all these other people around. So he swallows down his temper, hides his anger behind a plastered on smile that will likely not win him any Oscars any time soon, and then even goes so far as to finally shake Tyler's hand the same instance that his eyes connect with Tara's. 

"Hey, Knowles." He greets her, despite his anger his smile for her is genuine and his eyes truly soften for a moment when he's met with a sweet and very real smile from her as well, while they're holding each other's gaze for longer than they've done this past week.

"Jackson." She slurs his name in greeting, then gives him a shy awkward wave of her hand, when she adds. "Hiiiii."

 _Jesus Christ, she's drunk! I'm gonna kill him!_

He takes a deep - _deep_ \- breath, using every ounce of self-control he posses to try keeping his cool when his eyes take in again just how much Tyler is crowding her personal space, clearly taking advantage of her drunken state, and even though it makes him see red, an idea to get this guy away from her forms instantly. "Hey, man, you've got a minute? Ope should be pulling up with more kegs and could use a hand bringing 'em in real quick?"

"Yeah. Sure." Tyler answers without hesitation, buying into Jax's charade, putting his drink on the table in front of them as he starts to get up, but then his attention is back on Tara once more, when she speaks up. "You getting more beer? I want more beer." She smiles up at the two of them, and Jax is fighting the urge to tell her that she's obviously had enough.

"Sure." Tyler nods, letting out a little laugh. "I'll get you another one, honey. I'll be right back."

 _Honey?_ Jax is inwardly seething, but this time he's actually earned an award for the way that he manages to hide his true emotions as they're walking away from her. He nudges Tyler with his elbow, looking back over his shoulder in the direction of Tara. "So you and Knowles, huh? When did that happen?" _Curiosity usually kills the cat, but it might just kill the mouse this time!_

Tyler's eyes follow Jax's gaze to where Tara's still sitting with her head resting back on the couch now and her eyes closed, then looks back at Jax as they leave the room. "Tara? Yeah, she's really great, man. We ran into each other here tonight, started talking."

Jax manages to grin at him. "How's that going for ya'?"

Tyler lets out a laugh. "Didn't think I stood a chance with her, but now I think I'm maybe one beer away from getting laid."

"No shit." Jax grinds out, his jaw set so tight it actually hurts and he's no longer able to keep up the fake amusement. Tyler, who's a few steps ahead of him, is completely unaware of the angry scowl that's taking over Jax's features as they weave their way through the crowd towards the front entrance of the house.

Tyler pushes through the front door, even holding it for Jax to follow out right behind him, scanning the sea of parked cars for Opie as the door falls shut behind them, but before he can even utter another word, Jax pounces on him.

Within a split second Jax is grabbing him roughly by the back of his shirt, yanks him around, punches him square in the jaw, before he pushes him up against the siding of the house with a loud thud that takes Tyler by complete surprise. Tyler's not exactly a small guy, but he's not as built as Jax is, and therefore the look he's giving the blonde isn't just one of confusion, but also fear.

"Is this what it takes for you to get some, you piece of shit? Gotta get girls wasted to the point where they can't say _no_?" Jax asks furiously, but the length of his forearm is pressing hard against Tyler's windpipe, leaving the guy both out of breath and unable to answer Jax even if he'd know how to reply to that.

Despite the heaving of his chest that physically shows just how riled up he is, Jax's voice is suddenly sounding eerily calm, but somehow even more menacing than before when he grounds out his next words. "If you so much as even look at her again, and I don't mean just tonight, I'm talking about the rest of the summer, when school starts, even the rest of your goddamn life, then I'll rearrange your face to the point your own mother won't be able to identify your corpse. Tara Knowles is _off limits_! Do you understand?"

Tyler's beet-red face is one of pure shock as Jax's words register with him, and then his eyes widen with fear again when Jax suddenly loses his eerie calm and yells. "Answer me, dickhead, do you understand?" 

It's a struggle to breathe let alone talk since he's still being held hostage, but despite Jax's arm still crushing against his windpipe, Tyler manages to give a little nod to let Jax know he understands.

After a moment's hesitation, Jax finally lets up on him and drops his arm, leaving Tyler to stumble to his knees, bend over in a coughing fit, clutching his neck as if that could alleviate the pain and help him catch his breath. "Stay the fuck away from her and out of my fucking sight," Jax demands, his hands in fists at his sides as he hurries past him and steps back inside without another glance back. 

He rushes through the house and is in front of Tara at once, startling her out of her alcohol-induced coma when he speaks up. "Hey, Knowles, I think it's time to go." 

Tara opens her eyes at the sound of his voice, meeting his that are full of concern for her now. "What?" She asks, confusion flickering across her features as she looks away from him to take in the rest of the room as if she has already completely forgotten where she is.

"C'mon, babe." Jax is reaching out his hand to her, but when she still doesn't move he's grabbing her hand and starts pulling her to her feet. "I'll take you home." Ignoring the electricity that zaps through them both at the first physical contact they've had in over a week.

Even though she looks unsure for a second, she doesn't protest and allows Jax to pull her up, but then she instantly sways on her feet, her free hand reaching out for him and Jax's other hand flies out to steady her too.

"Whoa." He says, well aware that there are several eyes on them by now, but the rollercoaster of emotions that's been rushing through him in the last twenty minutes has him almost saying _'fuck it'_ to the rumors. He can't control what people will think or say, and he's starting to get tired of even trying, but then he thinks better of it, and simply wraps his arm around Tara's back, fighting the urge to pull her all the way into him, not wanting to draw too much attention as he helps her walk and slowly guides her outside.

Jax is glad to see that Tyler's no longer out front, and neither is anyone else for that matter when Tara and him stumble through the front door just a minute or two later. So without anyone's curious eyes following their every move, he turns fully towards Tara and without so much as a warning simply picks her up, cradling her to him like a child while he hurries to make the descent down the front porch steps.

Tara yelps out in surprise at first, but despite her drunken state wraps her arms quickly around him, her fingers desperately gripping the fabric of his black t-shirt at the nape of his neck as if she's scared he might drop her. After all, at the moment the world seems to be spinning all around her, and it's hard for her to tell if it's spinning for him too.

"Relax, I won't drop you." He replies to the way her arms tighten around him, but he doesn't say anything else, because he honestly wouldn't even know where to start. His emotions are still jumping all over the place, from being pissed at her for hanging out with Mason, to wanting to cuss her out for how she's been acting, but also wanting to hug and hold and kiss her senseless until she finally admits she feels this thing between them too.

So to not say or do the wrong thing, he just focuses his eyes on making his way through the cars parked in front of the house, putting one foot in front of the other, and not think about how good she smells and feels in his arms. The quicker he gets her into Piney's truck and out of here, the less of a chance someone will see them out here like this, which would undoubtedly be stirring the fucking rumor mill some more.

When they reach the truck, he puts her back down on her feet, holding her up against him with one arm while he pulls the door to the passenger side open for her, but when he tries to help her in, she doesn't budge, instead she's just burrowing her face into his chest, and her arms wrap around him with her hands tightly fisting into his shirt again on his back, leaving him stunned and breathless when she suddenly says. "I'm sorry, Jax."

 _Fuck me! I missed her!_ The fragile slurred sound of her voice, along with the way she's clinging to him now has any remnants of his anger just evaporate into nothingness right this very second.

Not wanting to be like Mason and take advantage, he hesitates momentarily before he finally gives in and allows himself to wrap both his arms around her and hold her tightly against him too. He lowers his head, burrowing his nose into her hair, taking in the scent of her that he's also come to love, allowing himself just these few stolen moments with her before reality will set in again like it always does. Because the reality is that she's way too drunk and he's way too damn sober, and therefore nothing he wants solved between them will actually get solved tonight.

He's not sure what she's apologizing for, and considering how drunk she is, he wonders if she even knows what she's saying at all, but regardless if it's real or not, he likes to believe or rather pretend for just a moment that she's sorry for blowing him off this past week, along with what happened here tonight with Tyler. _A guy can hope, right?_

But then she surprises him when she pulls back enough to actually look up at him and meet his eyes, the moonlight above illuminating her face like she's a fucking angel. When she starts to speak again though, the angelic imagery doesn't hold up anymore the way she's slurring and blurting out her words at him, barely coherent. "I'm sorry, but ... she likes you. She always has liked you, and I told her ... I told her, I was like, Em, you know what, you should just tell him. If she would just tell you ... then this would've never happened. You know what I'm saying?"

Jax looks back at her confused, trying to wrap his head around what she's just said, shaking his head. "No, sorry. I don't know what you're saying."

"Ugh, ..." Tara groans in frustration, lowering her forehead against his chest again. "I just feel ... so bad."

"Do you feel sick?" Jax asks, thinking that's what she's getting at.

"No, I'm not sick." She says with a touch of frustration to her slurred voice now. "I'm feeling bad, because of Em, because I - I ... I don't know, I just don't know what I'm supposed to do anymore."

"Hey." Jax still doesn't understand, and he's got a feeling she's too out of it to even understand anything herself, so he tries to soothe her. "It's alright. I'm sure it'll work itself out. Don't worry."

"It won't work out, Jax." She says frustrated. "Because she likes you. She wants to be with you. You know?"

"Well, I don't know who she is." He can't help but chuckle at the way she rolls her eyes at him when he adds. "And I don't want to be with her whoever the hell she is."

Tara stares up at him in silence, studying his face in the light the moon provides, but when she doesn't say anything in reply, Jax speaks up again.

"Hey." He says again, brushing one of his hands over the top of her hair, knowing she won't remember any of this come tomorrow morning, but hoping she might regardless. "There's only one girl I want to be with, and I'm looking right at her."

Tara shakes her head at that and buries her face into his chest again, mumbling under her breath but he can hear her just the same. "You shouldn't say that."

"Why not?" His heart's beating out of his chest at the thought that she actually understands what he's saying. That she might actually remember this after all.

"Because she likes you, and that's why I can't let you like me." She replies, still not looking at him, and leaving him stunt as some of the puzzle pieces seem to start to click in place for him, while he's chewing over everything that has happened, along with everything she's said.

Could all of what's been going on actually be about her friend Emily, and that's why she's been pulling away from him this past week? What is he supposed to say to that? Is it even worth the effort to explain himself here and now, if she's wasted enough to spill this secret she's held onto all this time? He sighs, at a loss of what to say or do for a moment, before he finally says. "Well, I don't like her, so ... let's get you home, alright?"

He can feel her nod her head in agreement against him and finally loosen her hands from his shirt too. She turns towards the open passenger-side door and allows Jax to lift her into the seat, giving him the sweetest of smiles when he even buckles her seatbelt for her, before he shuts her door, rounds the front of the truck and slips into the driver seat himself. 

His mind is on Opie for a second when he twists the key and the motor roars to life, since he didn't have a chance to fill him in on any of this. But then again, the plan truly is to just get her home safe and sound, and then he'll be right back to pick Ope up again. No harm, no foul! Ope will understand, ... he has to!

Jax maneuvers the truck through the tightly packed cars all around and pulls onto the dirt road that leads them back towards Charming. His eyes flicking back and forth between the road ahead and Tara beside him, watching her with her eyes closed and her arm bend over the open window with her head resting against it, and he can't help but wonder if she's already falling asleep.

"You okay over there, Knowles?" He says trying to keep her awake for his own selfish reasons. Now that he's finally alone with her in over a week, he wants to talk, wants to hear her voice and hear her laugh, even if she keeps talking nonsense that she won't remember and nothing will come of it. He will know, and he will remember! "If you feel like you're getting sick, let me know and I'll pull over."

"I'm not getting sick." She answers, slurring just as before, her eyes open again and she turns her head slightly towards him, while still resting against her arm on the window for support.

"Good." He answers, glad she's not asleep, but suddenly not sure what else to say to her to keep her talking to him. At last, he decides to point out the other obvious subject of the night. "That guy, Tyler." He meets her eyes, raising his eyebrows at her with an unspoken question before looking back at the road and continues. "You should know that he's not a good guy, not the kind of guy you should be getting drunk with." _Not the guy you should be doing anything with!_

Tara doesn't say anything to that though, doesn't reply or even nods her head in acknowledgment, instead, she averts her eyes from his and just stares out through the windshield at the road ahead, and for a moment Jax wonders if she even heard him. 

Jax can't hold back another second longer and finally lights up the cigarette he's been dying to have since Amy told him about Tara, and when he notices Tara watching him, he holds out his pack to her in a wordless offer, but she shakes her head at him no and looks away again at once.

The silence stretches on for a while with neither of them speaking, just Jax smoking, when he finally decides that there's truly nothing left to lose here tonight if he tries to pry a little further into her awkward revelation from earlier. The best-case scenario would be that she remembers what he's said, worst case if she doesn't, so why the hell not ask what he's been wanting to ask. 

He clears his throat. "So Emily likes me, huh?"

"Emma." Tara snorts as if she can't believe he'd get the name wrong.

"Right, Emma." He glances over at her, meeting her eyes for a second. "She likes me?"

"Yes."

"What about you?" He'll probably go to hell for this. Can feel the flames licking at the soles of his feet already for taking advantage of her inebriated state.

"Me?" She looks back at him, startled and shocked and shy. _And ... is she blushing?_

"Yeah, you, Knowles? Do you like me?"

"You can't ask me that." She says, sounding so offended that she sounds almost sober again.

"Tough shit, babe, because I just did." He says trying to sound serious, but he's barely able to contain the smirk that's trying to take over his lips when he realizes how frazzled she seems now, and with that reaction is already giving him the answer he's been hoping for. "So, do you? Like me?"

"I don't know what you mean." She diverts his question, and he's gotta say he's impressed considering how wasted she is, or how wasted he thought she was.

"I mean, do you, Tara Knowles, like me as more than just friends?" Opie might need a ride home from someone else after all, since he's going straight to hell as soon as he's managed to get her home.

Tara simply looks away and doesn't respond, leaving him baffled at both her stubbornness along with the fact that she's sobered up enough to realize what he's getting at with his line of questioning now.

But he can't leave it at that, can't drop the subject now that he's so damn close. "Tara?" There's a hint of desperation in his voice now, not liking the thought that he's pissed her off to the point she's ignoring and giving him the cold shoulder now. "Tara?" he says again, looking over at her repeatedly.

"What?" She finally snaps back, clearly irritated.

He hesitates, torn between wanting to say the right thing and wanting to say the truth. The right thing wins out in the end. "Look, I'm sorry, alright? I know you're drunk and ... forget what I said, alright? Don't worry about it. Just get some rest, I'll wake you up when we're home."

"Okay." She nods, and doesn't seem to need further convincing when she rests her head on her arm again right away and closes her eyes at last.

He hates this, truly fucking hates this, but his conscience is eating at him for putting her on the spot like he had when she couldn't even walk out to the truck by herself.

He'll ask her again though and get to the truth when she's as stone-cold sober as he feels right now. At least the shit she's said about Emma cast some light on what might've been the problem over this past week. They'll talk when she isn't wasted, and they'll figure all of this out then. 

X

The Knowles residence is dark when he pulls the truck up to the curb and cuts the engine. He looks over at her for a moment, liking to be able to watch her sleep, but then instantly feels like a creep for doing so. He reaches over to her, lightly nudging her shoulder to get her to wake up. "We're here, Tara. You're home."

Tara straightens up, blinks herself awake, and unbuckles herself while Jax already rounds the truck to her side and opens her door for her. "Do you have your keys?" 

Tara starts to fumble with her small purse strapped across her chest, and after rifling through it for a long moment, she produces her key at last.

"Okay," Jax says, taking it from her, then holding her up by her elbows as she slides out of the truck and comes to a stand beside him. His eyes going back towards the house, when he asks. "Is your dad home?" 

At that, Tara suddenly looks up at him confused again for just a moment, before realization seems to hit her and she finally answers him. "Yeah, ... shit. He'll be soooo mad I was drinking."

"Let's just stay very quiet, and he won't have to know, alright?" He wraps his arm around her, very quietly closes the truck door behind them, before he's helping her to the front door. "I'll help you to your room. C'mon."

For whatever reason, this is the moment when Tara suddenly can't stop herself from giggling at everything around her, while Jax tries his best to unlock the front door as quietly as possible for them. "Remember what I said about being quiet, okay?" He whispers in her ear, trying to chastise her, but she's too damn cute when she's like this, and he can't help but be amused by it regardless. 

"Yeah." She agrees much too loud in a failed whisper, but then raises her finger to her own lips to shush him instead. "Shhhhhhhhh." She smiles again, and despite the situation, he can't help but smile himself at the way she's acting now, even when her timing couldn't possibly be any worse.

"Shhhhhhhh." He repeats, shushing her back, hoping it will get her to stop her little fits of giggles at least long enough to get her to her room.

He tries to help her walk, but then decides that they'll make quicker progress if he just carries her again instead. So he quickly picks her up, which makes her giggle again, and carefully carries her through the dark house and all the way to her room, where at last he quietly closes the door behind them and flicks on the light to allow both of them to see.

Jax cringes though when Tara groans in protest at the light much too loudly for his liking, and she covers her face with both her hands to block out the light right when he lowers her down onto her bed.

"Oh shit, the whole world's spinning." She says when she finally dares to open her eyes again, focusing up at the ceiling above her.

"I know it is. But you really need to lower your voice." Jax replies, having already untied her converse for her, and is now pulling them off of her feet, one by one.

"Oh, no, it's really spinning, Jax." She says again, searching his face for some kind of help that nearly has him be the one to laugh out loud this time.

He steps up beside her now, brushing her hair back from her face. "Just close your eyes, babe, you'll be fine. I promise."

"I'm gonna fall off my bed if I keep spinning like that." She says, sounding genuinely concerned now, much to Jax's amusement.

He can't help it, he laughs, but then reaches out for her to hoist her up. "No, you won't. We'll move you in the middle, so you can actually pass out without falling off the bed, alright?"

He pulls her into his arms, resting his knees on the bed and she wraps her arms around him in return when he lifts her and moves her further into the middle of her bed. Staying there, hovering over her for a moment and looking down at her, lost in the look that she's suddenly giving him.

"Is this okay? You good, Knowles?" He asks, knowing that he needs to get the hell out of here before he'll do something he'll regret in the morning light. Like kiss her while she's drunk!

"Yeah." She nods her head, her arms still wrapped around his neck, holding him in place right above her. Then she's surprising him when she's no longer giddy and giggling, but is sounding serious and almost sober, and confusing him with the sudden change of subject again too. "You know why she's so mad? She's so mad, because she knows now that I like you too."

"That's good to hear, but ..." His heart is suddenly racing, elated at what she said, but also wondering if she realizes she has just answered his question he'd asked her earlier in the truck. He hesitates to leave her like this, wants to kiss her so badly to make this moment real, but deep down he knows this isn't how that's supposed to happen, not with her being drunk and him not sure she'll even remember by tomorrow. And she should definitely remember their first kiss. "... but you're drunk, baby."

He knows right from wrong, and knows this would be wrong. "It's time to let go of me now, Tara." It pains him to say so, but still reaches up with one hand, trying to loosen her locked hands in the nape of his neck in the same instant she seems to tighten the grip she has on him, tries pulling him further down towards her, while lifting her own head up to meet his lips in a kiss.

"Tara?" James Knowles' voice booms in the otherwise silent house, and even though Jax pulls away from her so their lips never connect, he's not fast enough to disentangle her hands around him before her father knocks just once and opens the door just enough to look inside. "Is that you, kiddo?"

"Babe, let go." Jax grinds out, knowing instantly how this must look to her old man, and he finally manages to peel her hands off from around him and stumble backward off of the bed. 

"What the hell is going on here?" James' eyes are ablaze with anger Jax has never seen from the older man before, as he cautiously dares a look back at Tara before his eyes go back to meet Jax's eyes again.

"Mr. Knowles, it's not even close to what you're thinking." Jax starts, but the look her father gives him shuts him up again.

"Wait, dad, ..." Tara tries to chime in too, but her slur gives her away and seems to anger her father even more so.

"Just shut up, the both of you -" He orders both of them, shaking his head in anger as he looks from Jax to her on the bed and back to Jax again. An unpleasant picture forming in his mind, no doubt.

"I swear, I can explain." Jax raises his hands in a surrendering gesture, hoping Tara's dad will at least give him a chance to do just that, but to no avail.

"Just shut your damn mouth, son, and get the hell out of this house before I completely lose my temper. Go. Now." He yells out loud at him, stepping aside from the door, but pointing his finger in the direction of the front door as if Jax needs the reminder.

"Yes, sir," Jax replies looking ruefully back at the other man, but then his eyes meet Tara's sorrowful ones once more, before he clears his throat and leaves without another glance back at either one of them. 

He slips out of the house, pulling the front door shut behind him, climbs back into Piney's truck, and starts the engine. But instead of pulling away like he probably should, he finds himself staring back at the house, contemplating what has just happened in there, and what the outfall of all that might be. Well, shit, if Mr. Knowles holds a grudge, then this will certainly complicate his plan to date Tara even more. But on the bright side, drunk or not, she had just tried to kiss him, so there's that. _And that is something he can certainly work with, whether her old man likes it or not!_

X

Author's note: Here's finally the new chapter. I hope you like it. Let me know if you do, please. Thank you.


	12. QB one is making a move

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

Opie ignores Jax's question about him wanting anything from inside, instead, he groans out in pain, slouches in his seat, and pulls his baseball cap further down to shield his face even more from the early morning sun, undoubtedly regretting getting shit-faced at last night's party. 

Jax can't help but smirk a little at Opie's misery, but refrains from telling him _'I told you_ so', just shakes his head and hurriedly heads into the small convenience store of the gas station without another word.

He takes deliberate steps through the aisles of the small store, knowing what he wants, grabbing some Red Bull, a couple of candy bars, slim jims, and potato chips. _The breakfast of champions!_

His arms are full of junk food when he gets in line to pay, waiting his turn, but when the small bell above the door chimes his eyes seem to drift to see who's entering on their own accord, although he instantly regrets it.

He freezes dead in his tracks, and so does Tara's dad when their eyes meet and they hold each other's stare for a long silence filled moment. If looks could kill Jax would be dropping dead right now, and that thought makes his own regret suddenly hit him square in the chest. 

Jax glances around for a split second, gauging the audience they might have if this should escalate, as he contemplates how to explain and apologize again for what James Knowles thinks he has walked in on just last night in Tara's bedroom. But before he can decide what to say, or even whether to say anything at all, her dad has already dismissed him with another menacing look and shake of his head before he passes by him and steps further into the store.

Jax can't help but frown as a sense of dread fills him all over again, a future with Tara he's already envisioned more times than he'd ever admit seems to be dwindling away before it even had a chance to start.

He knows he could follow and confront him, tell him the whole truth now in the light of day that he didn't get a chance to tell last night, but after having had the whole night to think about it all, it just doesn't sit right with him to tell her old man that his daughter got so wasted that some creep almost took advantage of her. _The creep's not me though!_

Tara would be pissed and that wouldn't help his cause either, and so Jax keeps his mouth shut and pays for his stuff as quickly as he can, so he can get out of here instead.

Moments later, Jax climbs behind the wheel of Piney's truck, throwing the bags of snacks on the middle seat between his friend and him, before he turns the key to start the ignition. "Just ran into Tara's old man." He huffs, not sure if Opie's even awake and listening.

But his best friend actually pushes his hat up enough to glance over at him to meet his eyes, although grunting in discomfort at the sunlight before he asks. "How did that go?"

Jax shakes his head again as he pulls out of the gas station and merges into traffic, heading for work. "It didn't. Think the only reason I'm not dead is 'cause we were in public."

"That sucks," Opie grumbles under his breath. "What are you gonna do?" 

"Not sure yet." He replies, shaking his head again. Wondering if this whole situation with Tara could possibly get any more fucked up?

X

Tara startles awake at the loud music that suddenly starts blaring through the house. She rolls onto her side, pulling her pillow over her head to drown out the heavy metal rock song that's making her head hurt a hundred times worse than it already is. She groans out in pain while cursing under her breath. "Jesus, thanks, dad." Leave it to her old man to punish her in this rather unconventional way for coming home drunk as a skunk.

She hesitates for a long moment while she continues to hide under her pillow, trying to postpone the ultimate lecture she knows she's undoubtedly going to get, along with the consequences of her actions. _He's such a hypocrite!_

Her head is throbbing and she's feeling nauseous while she tries to drown out the music and recall everything that has happened last night again. She remembers going to that party near Rio Vista with Joe and Cassidy, then starting to hang out with Tyler, and Jax, ... but everything after that is just bits and pieces that seem out of order somehow, but embarrassing and even a little horrifying too. 

She lifts the pillow just high enough to squint at the red digits displayed on her alarm clock, frustrated at how early her father is obviously trying to torture her out of bed, but also relieved to see that she still has well over an hour before she has to show up for work at Hanna's.

She climbs or rather stumbles out of bed, closing her wide-open bedroom door in hopes that it'll quiet down the music a bit, which it does. Then she heads into her bathroom, shutting that door behind her as well, before she starts the shower. 

As soon as she steps inside, she sinks to the bottom of the tub, pulling her legs to her chest and hugging them while hanging her head in pain and simply lets the hot water wash over her.

It feels good in here, and after a while her head's starting to feel better with the way the water's helping drown out her father's punishment music too. But with the subsiding headache comes more clarity, and she can't help but swallow away the lump in her throat when she really starts to remember everything that happened.

The longer she sits and relaxes under the stream of water, slowly but surely most of the events from last night are coming back to her, and with it the sudden urge to turn herself invisible and wishing she could hide away here in utter humiliation forever.

Jax! Oh my God! _What have I done?_

Tara finishes up in the shower, hurries to get dressed and get ready for work, while her mind is going over every word again and again, like a speech she's trying to memorize.

At last, she finally steps into the dining room, where her father is sitting at the table with a pen in hand, looking over some work-related paperwork, and she can't help but wonder how he can even concentrate on anything with the obnoxious music playing so loudly. Is making her suffer through her hangover really this important to him? 

"Dad?" She yells to get his attention over the heavy metal guitar riff coming through the speakers, and when he finally looks up to meet her eyes, she dares the few steps back to the stereo to turn the music all the way off so they can talk.

"Did I say you could turn that off?" He questions her without missing a beat, the deeply etched scowl on his clean-shaven face makes it obvious just how disappointed he still is with her, despite his rather humorous way of dealing with her hangover. 

Tara ignores the question, her face contorted in pain and guilt. "I have to tell you something."

X

It's still early afternoon, the sun sits high up in the sky, the temperature seems to be soaring to a new record today and the asphalt of the Teller-Morrow lot is quite literally baking in the sun.

Jax is thankful to be working in an actual bay today, where he at least got a roof over his head and a fan blowing in his direction to get some relief from this sweltering mid-summer heatwave. 

He pulls his shirt up to wipe the sweat from his forehead before it's dripping in his eyes again, rifles through his toolbox to get what he needs, and quickly lies back down on the creeper to roll beneath the car he's working on today. 

Music is playing in the background of the garage, but not loud enough for anyone to even make out the band, let alone the lyrics, over the sound of the fan swooshing, the air compressor doing its thing, and the other mechanics' never-ending conversations. 

All in all though, Jax has no doubt that Opie's miserable just the same, especially since the adults seem to take immense pleasure in further torturing the hung-over teenager every chance that presents itself.

"Oh shit," Opie says with alarm in his voice, and even though Jax can't see what is happening from where he's at, he's got no doubt that it's one of their uncles about to inflict some more pain on his best friend for showing up to work still halfway wasted. 

But Opie surprises Jax when he nudges his leg with his foot to gain his full attention. "Shit's about to go down, man."

"What?" Jax replies, stopping what he's working on in hopes to hear Opie's reply a bit more clearly without the ratcheting sound of his wrench. 

"Mr. Knowles just pulled in the lot. You're so fucked, bro." Opie explains and Jax instantly rolls free from beneath the car and comes to a sitting position just in time to see Tara's dad walk past the open bay doors towards the front office to their right.

"Fuck." Jax curses under his breath, throwing his tool into his toolbox with a loud clang and scrambles to his feet as fast as he can. He instantly glances over to the office window that overlooks the bays, but of course, today of all days the goddamn blinds are drawn. Guess mommy dearest didn't like the sight of them all melting into a puddle of sweat from the comforts of her air-conditioned office. _Go figure._

His heart's beating out of his chest and seconds seem to turn into minutes while he waits for the inevitable. And sure enough, the door that connects the office to the garage opens and his mother pokes her head through, her eyes connecting with her son's at once, yet the expression on her face is one he can't read.

"Jackson." She yells loudly over the noises of the shop and waves her hands at him, gestures for him to come to the office, and he's got no choice but to nod his head to let her know that he's heard her, waving his hand to signal he'll be right there.

"Shit." He mutters while he wipes his hands on a rag, cleaning them as best he can in a fruitless attempt to buy himself just a little more time while his eyes are imploring Opie's for any help he can possibly offer.

"He thinks you got Tara drunk to get in her pants," Opie states the obvious out loud, looking around the bays, relieved to see that everyone around them seems oblivious to what's about to go down. "You've got no choice but to come clean, bro, or this is gonna turn real ugly." 

"And rat on her?" Jax replies, already shaking his head at the mere thought and steps around his friend towards his demise, but stops long enough to look back over his shoulder when he adds. "Can't do that to her, Ope."

Jax straightens his spine when he steps through the door, readying himself for the tongue-lashing he knows he's about to get, but _fuck it_ , there's no way out of this so he might as well take whatever's coming with his head held high. No way in hell will he drag Tara down with him though.

"Mr. Knowles wants to talk to you about what happened last night," Gemma says as soon as he steps through the door, and Jax can't help but do a double-take of his mom, because somehow she doesn't sound at all like her usual catty and sarcastic self. _Something's off._

Jax nods at her, then turns his full attention to Tara's dad, saying his name in some sort of greeting along with the nod in his direction. "Mr. Knowles." _Here we go!_

"Relax, kid." James starts to ease the mood right away, his tone much lighter than anticipated when he's taking in Jax's obvious tense shoulders. "I'm here to apologize."

Jax looks utterly confused, his eyes flicking to his mom for a split second, then back to James Knowles again. "What do you mean?" It is all he can think of to say, not at all sure anymore where this conversation is headed now, and he's not sure he likes it yet. 

"I jumped to conclusions. Tara talked to me, told me everything, so I'm aware now of what really happened last night. What you did for her. And I apologize, son. I was wrong." James elaborates rather quickly, his tone sincere and truly apologetic.

Jax clears his throat, too stunt for a moment to know that to say, the surprise obvious on his face. He'd been ready to get yelled and screamed at by Tara's dad again, been ready for a scolding from his mother too, and had even anticipated her pulling dear old step-dad in here too, so that Clay can also partake in this public stoning, but _this_ , no, he hadn't been expecting this at all.

"It's fine, it's no big deal, Mr. Knowles." He finally finds his voice, calm and sure even though he feels neither. His mind's already wondering what the consequences for Tara are, considering she offered herself up so he'd be let off the hook.

"No, it's not fine. I couldn't have mishandled it any worse, and I apologize." The older man steps forward and places a firm hand on Jax's shoulder and gives it a reassuring squeeze, while also pinning him down with a meaningful stare. "That's twice now that you were there to keep something bad from happening to my daughter, and I'm immensely grateful for that. And when we ran into each other at the store this morning, you easily could've come up to me yourself and cleared it all up, but you didn't say a word. Not a damn word, and my guess it is because you didn't want me thinking bad of her. Let me tell you something, kid, as a father, you realize what an honorable thing that is? That is very honorable."

Jax's eyes flick to Gemma's again for a moment, he's not used to being praised like this in front of his mother. "Thank you, sir." He replies at last, still not sure if all of this is real and not just some wishful thinking he's conjured up in his head before he'll come to and walk into the real shit-storm that's his life these days.

"Alright." James nods approvingly back at him, giving his shoulder another squeeze for good measure before he finally holds his hand out for Jax to shake. "Won't hold you up any longer. You take care now, kid. I'll see you around."

James turns towards Gemma, giving her an approving nod as well. "You're raising a fine young man here, Mrs. Teller-Morrow."

Jax vaguely registers his mother and Tara's father exchanging some meaningless platitudes as she's walking him out the door, her tone of voice eerily sweet and out of character, while he just stands there shaking his head in disbelief.

He still can't believe that Tara not only told her old man the truth and got him a pardon by her father, but he suddenly realizes that this also means she remembers what happened, and with that thought, a smile suddenly takes over his face before he has the chance to stop it. 

He hears the door click shut, and his smile falters again when his eyes meet his mother's questioning stare. Her eyebrows are raised almost to her hairline, a frown etched onto her tanned face when she eyes him wearily.

She crosses the small room, pulls a cigarette from the pack on her desk and lights it, giving it a few quick drags before she finally speaks up. "So, is any of that actually true, or did little Tara just spin some story to take the rap for you?"

"She got too drunk, I took her home, her dad misunderstood." He blurts out the most abridged version he can think of, not really feeling like getting into it with his mother right now, because lately all they seem to do is butt heads over literally everything. "That's what happened."

"Okay." She nods as if she agrees, but her facial expression doesn't quite sell it, and when she takes a step closer and gets in his face, it becomes instantly clear why that is. "You're sixteen, hot, and hormones are raging. Trust me, I've been there. I get that, but -."

"What's your point, mom?" He interrupts her, impatient now to get back to work so he can get out of here on time, because what he'd thought to be a shit day just got a hell of a lot better thanks to Tara's talk with her father.

"Samcro isn't a club full of choir boys, but hear me when I tell you there is a line that not one of those men would ever cross, son." She says while pointing a finger to the window, in the general direction of the row of bikes and the clubhouse, obviously to emphasize her meaning. "And I expect no less from you. A misunderstanding like that can't happen again." She glares at him. "So my point is, Jackson, get Tara Knowles out of your head and stick with the girls that are throwing themselves at you _willingly_! Understood?"

"Yeah." He nods, a look of disgust crossing his features when he turns to leave, ready to get the hell out of there before he says something he might regret, but then he pauses halfway through the door because he just can't help himself and turns to look back at her once more. Holding back as best as he can and choosing his words carefully when he says. "Tara didn't cover for me, mom. But thanks a lot for the vote of confidence. It's been real."

But before Gemma can reply, he's already back in the garage, angrily pulling the door shut behind him with a bang.

X

James Knowles slowly pulls the Cutlass into the driveway and both Tara and him exchange a look after they notice the teenage boy standing on their small cement front porch.

Once the garage door has opened all the way, James quickly pulls the car in, turning towards his daughter in the passenger seat just as he cuts the engine. "For Christ's sake, kiddo, tell me the boy that got you drunk last night wasn't Jacob Hale Sr.'s kid." 

"First off, I told you he didn't get me drunk, I'm guilty of that all on my own. And second, no." Tara shakes her head. "Of course it wasn't David." She'd refused to give up Tyler's name in her confession this morning, out of fear of what her father might do, but it now becomes clear that her dad will most likely suspect every boy that might show his face around her from here on out.

"Then what does he want? He's never shown up here alone before." James mutters under his breath as they both get out of the car at the same time, turning their attention back towards the driveway where David Hale stood waiting now. 

"Mr. Knowles. Tara." David says in greeting with a nod of his head, his hands awkwardly shoved into the pockets of his jeans.

"How can I help you, son?" James steps forward, eyeing the boy curiously while Tara follows rather awkwardly behind her father.

She knows David from school, they've never been particularly close per se, but have always been friends since they usually hang with the same crowd. Football players and cheerleaders usually do. They've never hung out just by themselves though, so David Hale showing up here like this unannounced is definitely out of the ordinary, to say the least.

"Um, I'm actually here to talk to Tara, if that's alright?" David looks from James to Tara and back to James again.

"Yeah, sure." He glances back at his daughter for just a moment. "I still got some more work to do anyway," James replies, and David looks relieved to see the older man nod his head in approval, before he turns and heads inside. Leaving the two of them to talk alone 

"What's up?" Tara says rather shyly while stepping closer, feeling a little embarrassed since she's still in her yellow waitress uniform, and her white apron is covered in very questionable stains. Today just hasn't been a good day for her at all.

"You just got off work?" He asks, buying himself time.

Tara chuckles, looks down at her get-up smiling and jokes. "Yeah, how could you tell?"

David meets her smile with one of his own, then scratches the back of his head, a little shy and tongue-tied for a moment, before he finally finds his voice and decides to get straight to the point. "Well, my dad's got this thing, this ... this big fancy dinner with partners from the law firm where he works, and I just found out that my brother and I are supposed to be there, and apparently I'm also supposed to bring a date." He adds that last part and looks at her rather pointedly, noting the caught off guard expression that crosses Tara's face at once.

X

"Sooooo ..." Rayna draws out the word, turning over the dress in her hand before she holds it in front of herself and glances in one of the mirrors for further appraisal. "You got wasted, then your dad walked in finding Jax on top of you, but somehow he is still alive and you're not even grounded." She shakes her head and lets out a little laugh. "Told you your old man is cool, Tar."

Tara looks around for a second, glad to see no one is close enough to listen, but she still raises her finger up to her lips, shushing her, not wanting anyone to overhear their conversation when she answers her in a much lower voice. "That is not really what happened. Jax wasn't on top of me." But even as she says it, she can't help the blush that rises on her cheeks at the memory.

"Right," Rayna replies sarcastically and winks at her playfully, clearly loves giving Tara a bit of a hard time about everything that has happened last night. 

"It was my own fault," Tara speaks up, her tone of voice defeated and embarrassed as she shakes her head at the memories and how everything played out. "I shouldn't have drank so much, shouldn't have told Joe and Cass to leave without me, ... definitely shouldn't have flirted with Tyler like I did just to get Jax out of my head. I was being stupid." 

"Ahhhhh. Being stupid?" Rayna gives her a curious look. "Is that what this is? You going on a date with Hale to get Jax out of your head?"

"No." Tara quips back instantly. "And it's not a date. I'm just doing him a favor." Then she adds a moment later. "And this has nothing to do with Jax ... _at all_."

"Right," Rayna says again with the same amount of sarcasm as before, clearly not buying into Tara's continuing denial. 

But Tara decides to ignore the stab and instead holds up a tan-colored dress in front of herself, meeting Rayna's eyes. "What about this one?" 

"Hmm." Rayna muses, looking the dress over for a long moment before she meets Tara's eyes and smirks. "If it's really not a date, then this is definitely _the_ dress."

"What do you mean?" Tara asks in return, holding the dress away at arm's length and looking it over herself again before she adds. "He said it's a very formal dinner thing, you know?"

"Yeah." Rayna steps up beside her and grabs the dress to hold it in front of herself. "This is formal alright, and there's no chance in hell Davey-boy might think you wanna bang him when you step out of the house in this god-awful thing."

Tara snatches the dress back from her, checking the tag for the prize and the size. "It's not that bad."

"It's pretty bad. It's ugly, and it's totally not you." Rayna blurts back.

"That's exactly the point," Tara answers over her shoulder on her way to the fitting rooms. 

"The ugly, or the not being you?" Rayna yells back as Tara disappears into the dressing room.

X

Jax walks into the Winston home without so much as a knock on the door, this place has truly become his second home ever since his mother married Clay.

He stops in the kitchen to get a drink from the fridge and is caught by surprise when he catches a glimpse of James Knowles out on the back porch with Piney, tumblers of whiskey in their hands and laughing out loud while having some sort of amusing discussion.

He ventures further into the house, his hopes momentarily soaring that she might be here as well but he only finds Opie in the living room a moment later.

Opie's flipping through the TV channels, the ceiling fan above spinning on full blast, when he nods at his friend in greeting. "What's up?"

"Hey, man." He says as he plops down onto the other end of the couch, slouching in his seat and letting out a deep sigh, before he pops the can of coke open and takes a drink.

"I take it she wasn't home?" Opie says, looking over just long enough to meet his eyes before focusing his attention back on the TV.

"Nope," Jax replies, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, bracing his feet against the edge of the coffee table, and then nods towards the general direction of the kitchen and back porch. "When did her old man get here?" 

"Ten, maybe fifteen minutes ago," Opie replies, settling on MTV at last before tossing the remote on the seat cushion between them and reaching for his perspiring soda can on the coffee table instead. 

"He say anything?" Jax can't help but ask, that he's talking about Tara's dad goes without saying.

"Yeah, he did actually." Opie suddenly nods his head and turns to give him a look that Jax can't quite decipher. "Time to step up your game, bro."

"What are you talking about?" Jax sits up straighter and turns towards Opie with confusion written all over his face. _What now?_

Opie actually gets up from his seat and dares a glance around the corner, making sure they're still without an audience before he looks back at Jax. "Hale asked your girl out."

"What?" Jax snaps back, because he couldn't have possibly heard him right. _Hale?_ "Bullshit!"

"Not bullshit." Opie shakes his head. "It's true. QB one is making a move." He adds sounding dramatically which usually isn't his style, but it's time to shake some sense into Jax.

"He's got a girlfriend. The cheerleader. Blond chick." Jax points out and snaps his fingers, trying to think of the girl's name. "What's her face ..."

"April. They broke up weeks ago." Opie chimes in, the girl's name's not really important.

"Fuck." Jax curses, pushing his hair out of his face in frustration. This can't be fucking happening? He has to make sure that Opie's not just fucking with him, so he raises his thumb in the direction of her father and asks him point-blank. "He said that? He said Hale asked Tara out? And she said yes?" 

"Yeah." Opie nods. "Overheard him telling my dad all about it. Said Hale was waiting on their front porch when Tara got off work earlier. He also said something about not liking Hale's old man, called him a sleazy lawyer, but that he can't hold that against the kid, or something like that."

"Great." Jax grinds out sarcastically, shaking his head to himself, his mood in the tank again when he throws himself back into the couch in frustration.

"You need to ask her out," Opie says, which instantly earns him a disbelieving look from Jax. 

"Just last night you said I should give her some breathing room. Absence makes the heart grow fonder and all that." Jax snaps back, the irritation all over his face and it's clear by the way he's raising his voice that he doesn't seem to care if her old man can hear any of this. "Starting to think your advice ain't worth shit."

"That was last night." Opie points out, ignoring Jax's insult. "Shit has obviously changed since then. You know now that she's been turning you down because of her friend, and with Hale stepping up you really can't afford to wait. Unless ..." Opie gives him a questioning look. "Unless she's not worth the hassle and you're over it."

"Don't even say shit like that, bro." Jax throws him a menacing glare, before he focuses his attention elsewhere, shaking his head in disbelief again. How much more shit is going to get in the way of him and her? How many hoops does he have to jump through just to get an _in_ with her? "I'm clearly not over it, man. But I've lost count how many times I've asked her out, Ope. Just because she knows that I know about the Emma thing, doesn't mean she'll suddenly agree." Jax replies, sounding somewhat defeated already.

Opie scoffs. "Yeah, except you didn't _actually_ ask her out though." He points out and Jax is about to argue that he did, but Opie beats him to it when he adds. "You kept asking her to _'hang out'_ , because that shit's always worked for you in the past, so I get that that's your _go-to_ move. But this is Tara, bro, ... I think she's made it pretty fucking clear by now that your usual moves and lines aren't going to work on her."

Jax takes a deep breath, his chest rising and falling with the action, and swipes a hand down his face as if he actually has to think about it. He knows Opie's not wrong, but asking her out on an actual date isn't as easy as it sounds. There's shit to think about. For one, he had to make a choice between fixing up his Nova that's sitting in the T-M lot, or fixing up his bike that's sitting in his mom's garage. He's chosen the bike, however, it isn't running just yet. 

How do you ask a girl out on a date if you don't even have a ride? Hell will freeze over before Gemma will let him borrow her car to take Tara Knowles out on a date.

As if Opie can read his mind, he speaks up. "I'll talk to my old man, see if you can borrow the truck."

Jax scoffs. "He's already pissed that I drove last night."

"Once he saw how messed up I was, he was glad you were the one driving," Opie replies with a smirk. "We'll figure something out." 

There's a moment of silence between them, both of them just watching the music video on the TV screen, until Opie finally says. "You up for a battle?" And tosses one of the controllers in Jax's direction before he even has a chance to reply.

"Sure." Jax nods, tries to relax, waiting for his friend to change the channel and power on his PlayStation, hoping that this might take his mind off Tara and Hale for a little while.

X

The doorbell chimes, taking both boys by surprise, but they're too caught up in their video game battle to answer the door in person. Instead Opie just hastily turns down the volume on the TV a little and yells. "Come in."

They hear the door creak open and fall shut again seconds later before her small voice echoes through the hallway. "Opie?"

Jax perks up at the sound of her voice and Opie can't help but grin in amusement when he notices and answers her loudly. "They're still out back drinking. I'm in the living room."

"Of course they are," Tara replies sarcastically just as she steps through the doorway. "What are you doing?" But just then her eyes fall on Jax and she stops short, clearly not having expected to find him here as well. 

"Hey." She says with a shy little smile as soon as she recovers, her cheeks blushing just a little as last night's events bombard her at once.

"Hey." He replies, trying his best to focus on the video game, but losing miserably now that she's here, his mind going a mile a minute in a whole other direction now that she's standing just a couple feet away from him.

 _Silence._

 _Crickets._

So Opie, in an attempt to lighten the sudden silent tension in the room, speaks up. "Oh, sorry, my bad, not sure if you two have met." He makes a show to gesture from Tara to Jax and back again, along with his words. "Tara, Jax. Jax, Tara."

"Ha, ha," Tara says dryly even though she can't help but crack a smile the same instant that Jax smirks back at Opie too and says. "Shut it, asshole." 

"Ha." Opie mocks back, grinning even more now when he throws Jax a look of triumph and even laughs out loud, having beaten him in the game just now. "Take that, motherfucker."

"Fuck off," Jax replies, throwing the controller on the seat beside him, pretending to be mad, yet he can't seem to keep the smirk from his face even while he gives Opie not just one, but two middle fingers in reply. 

"Want a drink?" Opie asks Tara when he gets up from his seat, while ignoring Jax completely.

Tara nods, crossing her arms awkwardly in front of herself while she still stands off to the side. "I'll take a coke if you have one. Please."

"Sure. I'll be right back." Opie replies. "Sit." He points towards the couch on his way out the door, and Tara complies, slowly stepping over the cables from the controllers to make her way over to the couch, but what she doesn't see is Opie still behind her, pointing his finger at her and silently mouthing the words 'ask her' repeatedly at Jax before he finally leaves the room.

She sits down on the empty seat in the middle of the sofa, unsure of what to say to him, but considering what happened last night she knows she probably should say something, at the very least thank him.

And Jax seems to have the same problem, suddenly equally tongue-tied again in her presence even though there are a million things he wants to say to her too.

"Listen." She beats him to it when she starts, turning in his direction to meet his eyes more easily, her face flushing again with a mixture of gratitude and embarrassment."I just wanted to say thank you for taking me home last night. I was stupid to keep drinking after my friends left."

"Wait, ... who left you?" Jax suddenly asks, totally ignoring everything else she's just said.

"Joe and Cassidy," Tara answers, but when she sees the way his jaw tightens in anger she can't help but stutter a little with uncertainty when she tries to find the right words to explain herself, or rather her friends. The fact that he gets so angry concerning her safety is incredibly hot, but his anger is misplaced this time. "B-But ... but it's not their fault. I swear. They tried pretty hard to get me to leave with them, but I decided to stay, because Tyler said he'd give me a ride back." 

"Oh, I bet he would've loved to give you _a ride_." Jax quips back, the innuendo clear in his tone of voice, and anger's flashing across his features again as the memory of Tyler Mason hanging all over her comes back to his mind at once. He's so pissed, he can't even look at her right now, his eyes on anything but on her.

But Tara surprises him, and herself, when she can't help but reach out and touch his hand to get his attention again. "I'm glad you were there." She says with sincerity in her voice and it leaves no doubt that she truly means it, and that she hadn't really intended to let things go farther with Tyler either way.

"Me too." He replies a moment later with a much more softer tone of voice again. And it's the truth, because he really can't stomach the thought of what might've happened if he hadn't been there.

His eyes drift down to her hand still resting on top of his on the couch cushion between them, and once more he's completely amazed by how such a simple touch from her can somehow manage to turn his whole fucking day around. This right here, her just sitting next to him holding his hand, has him floating on cloud nine!

The last thing he wants to do is ruin this moment by bringing up her date with Hale or worse, and face getting rejected by her again, but at the same time he knows that Opie can only stall so long in the kitchen to allow him the time he needs to ask what he should've asked her right from the start weeks ago. 

He's still staring down at their touching hands when he twists his palm up and laces his fingers through hers. Loving the way her fingers tighten around his hand the same way his are clinging to her, just like they did the night they first talked for hours out in the woods by Lodi Lake.

It's all or nothing, time is of the essence here, and so he lets his eyes drift back up to meet her mesmerizing green ones while he's trying to come up with just the right things to say to her. _God help me, she's so fucking pretty!_

He's just about to open his mouth, the word 'Look' already on the tip of his tongue to start his little speech about how he knows about Emma liking him but that he doesn't care and still wants to be with her, wants to take her out on a real date. _Dinner, a movie, whatever she wants, he's all in, the whole nine yards!_

But before he even gets that first word out Tara's dad's voice calls from someplace down the hall, and with it interrupts their intimate little moment. "Tara? You here, kiddo?"

Tara smiles sweetly back at Jax, and despite the little voice inside her head that's telling her to _run,_ she truly doesn't want to break this connection with him and so she's hesitating for a moment before she gently pulls her hand out of his at last.

Yeah, her outward calm demeanor doesn't at all reflect the butterflies currently doing flips inside her stomach, nor does she let on how her heart is practically beating out of her chest because of the way he just looked at her with those sinful ocean blue eyes of his.

But maybe it's for the best that her dad interrupted them when he did, sitting here alone with him had gotten way too dangerous, and so she stands the same instant she's decided to answer her father. "Yes, I'm right here."

She steps into the doorway to further let her presence be known, hoping that neither her father nor Piney will question her blushing cheeks when she steps all the way into the light of the kitchen.

Jax on the other hand scolds himself inwardly for not getting the words out much quicker, but he still wordlessly hurries to follow her, hoping he might still get a moment alone to speak before her old man and her take off and head home.

There's some meaningless chit-chat amongst the two adults and Tara when they're all standing around the kitchen, and he honestly couldn't tell you what anyone just said, because all he can do is shake his head at Ope who's giving him a look that speaks volumes from the other side of the room. Answering his unspoken question. _Did you ask? Nope!_

"Jax." James suddenly speaks up and steps around his daughter towards him, just now realizing in his inebriated state that the blond teenager is here as well. "Good to see you again, son." He adds slurring a little before he claps Jax on the back in greeting, the smell of whiskey and cigars in the air.

"Hey, Mr. Knowles," Jax replies as politely as he can muster, his mind racing to figure out how to get another chance to ask Tara in person before she's walking out. 

He knows he could easily still call her after she leaves here and ask her out over the phone, but he also knows that over the phone he wouldn't be able to use what his mother refers to as _'the Teller-charm'_. You know, -the smirk, the baby blues, the swagger-, those things just don't really have the same effect over the phone as they do in person, and let's face it, he needs all the damn help he can get to get Tara to give him a chance.

But before he knows what is happening, James Knowles is already heading out the front door, spouting out "Good night" to no one in particular and is heading for the Cutlass parked along the street, with Tara following behind him.

Opie just shakes his head at him in disappointment, so when Tara glances back over her shoulder one last time right before she steps out through the front door and blurts a "Bye, guys" at Ope and him, he finally takes the chance and speaks up.

"Tara? Wait." He calls after her, stepping forward to meet her by the door where she stops and turns back around, looking at him with big green eyes full of questions and curiosity.

"Look ..." He starts but then instantly realizes that he doesn't have the time to say everything he wanted to say, so he decides to get straight to the point instead. "Did you wanna go see a movie some time? At the drive-in in Lodi?"

Tara hesitates for a second, trying to read the expression on his face, and then lets her eyes flicker to Opie right behind him since she's not really sure what to make of the question, before she looks back at Jax. "When?" She asks back instead of answering, even though her heart and her head are already on the verge of war at the implication.

"Um, ..." Jax pauses for just a second, before he smiles back at her with much more confidence than he actually feels, hoping she'll fall for it. "How about tomorrow?"

Tara raises her eyebrows at him in obvious surprise, the corners of her mouth twisting up in a bit of amusement when she asks. "On a Tuesday?"

"Yeah." He nods, before he adds. "You know, less crowded that way, shorter lines at the concessions."

It's not like he can actually tell her that the real reason he wants this date to happen sooner rather than later is because he wants to beat David Hale to the punch. If she goes out with him first and things progress between them like he hopes they will, then she wouldn't be going out with fucking Hale in the first place. Hence the urgency in his request.

"Um ..." Tara pauses again, glancing back at her dad for just a second, who's already climbed into the passenger seat and is waiting for her. "What are they playing?"

Jax looks caught off guard for just a second, because he hasn't had the time to check yet, and if the look she's returning is any indication, she's about to turn him down again.

"I think they're showing _Braveheart_ and _Die hard_ on one screen back to back. Not sure about the other screen, but it shouldn't be hard to find out." Opie speaks up from behind them, offering his knowledge and the look that crosses Tara's face makes Jax want to sigh out in relief.

"Wow." She teases, smirking now. " _Braveheart_ and _Die hard_. How could a girl resist?"

Jax jumps in with other options before she gets a chance to change her mind. "Maybe something better is playing on the other screen, and if it's all shit we can just go to the regular theater, they got a bigger selection and more recent stuff too." He throws her the most charming smile he can muster, and even reaches out to brush a strand of her hair behind her ear when he says. "What do you say, Knowles, you in?" 

She smirks at both of them, trying not to let Jax's flirting get to her head and make her blush again, before she glances at her father once more. "I'll have to check with my dad and let you know, but since it's not a party where alcohol's being served, he'll probably be cool with it."

"Alright." Jax can hardly contain the smile that stretches over his face, and can't stop himself from looking back at Ope in gratitude for chiming in with the movie schedule, before his focus is back on her. "How does six-thirty sound? That way we can get a bite to eat first, and don't need to rush." 

"Yeah, sure. Sounds good." She nods in agreement, smiling herself, then starts heading out the door. "Goodnight." She says looking back over her shoulder, giving them a wave with her hand. "I'll see you tomorrow."

She pulls the front door shut behind her and Jax spins around on his heels, his eyes connecting with Opie's instantly.

"Holy shit, man." He practically exhales the words, grinning ear to ear when he steps up to the window and peeks through the curtain to watch her climb behind the wheel beside her old man and start to drive off.

Opie steps up right beside him, looking after the retrieving red taillights of the Cutlass with him. "I don't think _Braveheart_ or _Die hard_ will get you even to first base with her." He smirks, then even lets out a chuckle, clearly amused by his own observation. "Might have to endure a chick flick for this one."

"No, shit," Jax replies, and can't hold back the laugh that bubbles from his throat before he adds. "Totally worth it!" 

X

Tara closes the door that leads out to the garage behind her and follows her father into the living room, leaving the keys to the Cutlass in the little bowl on the shelf near the front door.

"So can I?" She asks again, hoping he'll finally answer the question she's asked when they climbed out of the car a few minutes ago.

"Just the movies?" James clarifies, meeting her eyes questioningly again.

"We're gonna go eat first, then the movies." She explains, then adds. "But it's the drive-in, which won't start until it starts to get dark around nine-thirty or so, and it's a double feature too, so it's gonna be really late before I'd get back." She lays it all out, not because she doesn't want to go, but because she doesn't want any of this to come and bite her in the ass after. Not after her confessions from earlier this morning. "I promise, dad, it's not a party, there will be no drinking at all. I swear. Please." 

"Opie and Jax both are going with you?" He repeats what she's already told him out in the garage.

"Yes." She huffs.

"Anyone else going?" He pries further.

Tara shakes her head, momentarily stumped because she truly doesn't know the answer. "Um, ... I don't know, I didn't ask." But she knows that he's just fishing for another guy's name, still hoping to find out who had been drinking with her at last night's party.

"Who's gonna be driving?" He asks further.

"Opie, I think."

"You think?" He asks back, and she honestly hates that he seems way too sober again for this conversation. Would've been easier if he was more tipsy than this.

"I'm sure Opie will be driving." She amends her answer. "Jax doesn't have a car, so ... yeah, it's probably Opie." She gives him the most pleading and innocent look she can muster, and can't help but smile when he finally nods his head in approval.

"Thanks, dad." She coos, leaning in to give him a kiss on the cheek and wrap her arms around him in a quick hug.

Normally her dad's very easy going, but after last night she was already pushing her luck when she had managed to convince him to not downright ground her like he originally wanted to do.

"Yeah, yeah." He dismisses her, even though he can't help but smile himself, but then he adds in a more serious tone. "Just don't do anything stupid, kiddo. One more strike and I swear to God, you won't see the outside of this house again until school starts in the fall, you hear me?"

"I know. I won't." Tara replies, and waves at him once more on her way to her room. "Good night, dad. Love you."

"Love you too, pumpkin. Night." He says and heads for his bedroom in the other direction.

X

Author's Note: Please leave me a few words. I can't wait to hear what you think. 


	13. No more Mister-Nice-Guy

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

 _Tuesday, early evening._

Tara's leaning against the kitchen island, resting on her elbows, watching her father fix himself a sandwich for dinner while he lectures her again about not disappointing him again like she'd done just a couple nights ago.

"I promise," Tara reassures him, reaching across the small space to steal a potato chip from his plate.

"I know you said you'll come home late, but you still have to set your alarm and get up bright and early so we have time to practice a bit before your driving test at noon." James reminds her, meeting her eyes between bites, and Tara nods again in agreement.

She bites her bottom lip with uncertainty for a moment before she voices her doubt out loud. "Do you think I'm going to pass?"

Her father stops chewing for a second and pins her down with a curious stare before he swallows his bite to answer her. His lips curling upward in a smirk when he says. "You sure as shit have been driving the Cutlass on your own more than enough, so you better pass, baby girl."

Tara can't help the blush that rises on her cheeks at her father's comment about her use of the car in his absence. They've had this unspoken rule between them, a la Bill Clinton's _don't-ask-don't-tell_ so to speak. Meaning James would ignore the fact that there were obviously more miles on the Cutlass every time he checked and simply didn't ask if she was driving it without him there, and Tara, ... well, she simply didn't tell. But if there had been any remaining doubt if her father had been onto her about her use of his vehicle, it has been cleared up at this very moment. He knew all along, and now she knew that he knew. _I really - really - need to pass that driving test tomorrow!_

But still, afraid that acknowledgment or further discussion could end with her getting grounded after all, she ignores her father's words and changes the subject instead. "Do you know when Linc's coming back in town? I tried to call him a few times, but it seems like he's never home."

"Not sure, pumpkin," James replies, his face suddenly an unreadable mask that Tara isn't sure what to make of.

She glances over to the clock on the wall, noting that it was just five minutes away from six-thirty, and her dad curiously follows her gaze.

"He might be outside already." James muses between bites.

"Opie always honks the horn when he's here." She replies without giving it a second thought, recalling the few times that Opie had picked her up in the past whenever they did things as a group. But just as she's finished that sentence, the doorbell chimes throughout the house, and Sue instantly stands at attention, his ears perking up to listen, but before he can let out a bark James is already shushing the dog before he returns his attention back to his daughter.

"Oops." Tara grins when her dad shoots her an _I-told-you-so_ look. "I guess they are already here." She hurries around the island and gives her dad a quick hug and a kiss on the cheek. "Bye."

"Bye, kiddo," James replies, looking back at her over his shoulder as she's about to leave the kitchen. "And remember, stay out of trouble."

"I will, dad, I promise." She replies over her shoulder before she disappears out of his sight, grabbing her small purse off of the couch on her way through the living room, and finally pulls the front door open at last to greet her friend.

But then she's taken by complete surprise when instead of Opie she finds just Jax waiting on her front porch, leaving her tongue-tied for just a second, because every other time they've all hung out Opie had usually picked her up first and then Jax after, since her home is sort of smack in the middle on the way from the Winston's to the Teller's place.

She isn't entirely sure what to make of Jax being here instead, but before she can really think about it much further, he's already greeting her and veering her thoughts in a whole other direction.

"Hey." He says with the sweetest smile, his bright blue eyes drinking her in from top to bottom for a long moment that causes her cheeks to flame against her best efforts. Then he reaches out and both his hands are casually encircling her waist to tug her a little closer, and in the same instant a cloud of his cologne hits her nostrils when he's leaning in to place a kiss on her cheek. "You look great."

Tara can't help the way her skin tingles from just this small physical contact, nor can she help the butterflies that start to flutter, not just in her stomach but it seems in her heart too, because it too is fluttering wildly in her chest at being this close to him. She's practically swooning. _Well, ... shit. So much for just being friends._

"Hi." She replies, finally finding her voice. "Thanks." She adds, looking down at herself, taking in her simple denim cutoffs and black tank top she's chosen for tonight, suddenly rethinking her choice of attire despite his compliment.

And that's all she can manage though, speechless otherwise and trying her best to not let on just how flustered he makes her feel just by his sheer presence, but doing that is so much harder now when she can still remember him carrying her in his arms like she didn't weigh a thing, or even worse, ... how he'd been hovering over her in her bed just a few nights ago and she'd almost kissed him. _Don't go there, Knowles, don't go there!_

"Are you ready to go?" He asks, letting his hands drop from her waist and stepping back a bit to give her room to move, and it's the distance between them that she seems to need to get her bearings back and at least try to act normal.

"Yeah." She nods, finally able to breathe again when she turns away to pull the front door closed behind her, giving the handle a jolt to make sure it's locked too.

She falls in step beside him, both hating and loving the feel of his hand on the small of her back when he steers her towards the dark blue truck parked in her driveway. A truck she doesn't seem to recognize, at least not at first.

"You got a truck?" She can't help but ask in the same moment that Jax opened the passenger side door for her, holding his hand out and helping her climb up into the cab.

"No, it's a friend's," Jax replies, but then remembers that Tara has actually met him when some of her friends and some of his friends have hung out together a few times over the last couple of weeks. "You met him actually." He shuts her door for her, but the windows are down so she can still hear him when he adds. "Lowell."

"Lowell?" Tara repeats out loud while trying to remember, watching Jax round the front of the truck and climb in behind the wheel a few seconds later. "He's a senior, right?" She asks.

Jax turns the key, starting the ignition at once, before he glances over at her again to elaborate. "He was. He graduated actually. Works full time at T-M now."

He backs out of the driveway and starts driving and just when she realizes that he isn't heading towards Opie's place but towards downtown instead, Jax speaks up before she has a chance to even ask. "Sorry, but I still gotta get some gas real quick, it's almost on empty." He adds in explanation.

"Sure. We've got time." Tara replies, but her mind's already racing in confusion, while she tries her best to recall the exact conversation at Piney's last night that has led her here. _Are we getting gas and picking Opie up after? Or is Opie not going? Is anyone else going? Jesus Christ, is this a date? Did I agree on a date with him without even realizing it?_

Tara bites her lip daring a glance in Jax's direction, and he catches her gaze, smiling sweetly back at her before he returns his full attention back to the road ahead. He seems so casual, so at ease when he drives, so not at all like a sixteen-year-old, it would be downright mesmerizing if she wasn't beginning to feel a little panicked at where this night might lead.

"You okay?" He asks with his eyebrows raised in question, because he's not sure what to make of the scrutinizing look she just gave him.

But instead of voicing the questions in her head out loud she swallows the lump in her throat away and simply nods while she smiles almost shyly back at him. "Yeah, I'm fine."

She forces herself to look away from him, focusing her attention out the windshield, while she tells herself that she prefers to live in denial a few moments longer, still hoping that she might be wrong and they're still heading back to Opie's place after Jax has filled the tank.

There's an awkward silence that fills the cab until Jax turns on the radio, fiddling with the dial until he finds a song he likes, the music easing some of the tension, or at least hiding it well enough for the moment.

Five minutes later he's pulling up to the pump, turning to her when he says. "Need anything from inside, Knowles?" _Why is this so awkward?_

"No, thanks." She's shaking her head no, but is pulling a ten-dollar bill out of her little purse at the same moment and already holding it out to him. "Here, for the gas."

Jax lets out a laugh, shaking his head at her in disbelief when he's looking down at the money she's holding out for him to take. "I'm not taking your money."

"You're driving. I can at least pitch in for gas." She counters without missing a beat. Whenever there's a group of them, everyone pitches in a few bucks for gas. So she's hoping he'll take it, because wouldn't that prove that this isn't really a date?

"No. You can't." Jax shakes his head at her again, he's still smiling a little, but it's not reaching his eyes anymore as if she is offending him with her offer to pay. He quickly plugs the bill from her hand just to reach over to drop it back - or rather shove it - into her still open purse on her lap. "Keep your money. I got it."

Tara watches him in stunt silence as he climbs out of the truck in a hurry, bangs the door shut with a bit too much vigor, and heads inside without another glance back at her. The swagger of his is the same, compelling to watch, but the tense set of his shoulders makes it clear that she has in fact offended him by wanting to pitch in. _Damn it!_

Without him here she takes the opportunity to really look around the truck for the first time, noting the blanket, even pillows, along with a bag of candy and other treats in the backseat, which hints even further towards this being a date.

Her eyes drift to the convenience store, but it's barely past six-thirty, still light out and the sun reflecting off of the glass doors and windows won't allow her to see what Jax is doing inside. Is he in line to pay already, or still roaming the aisles for something?

She hesitates, her eyes flicking back and forth between the glove box of the truck and the entrance to the gas station a few times, before she lets her curiosity overpower her guilt for snooping. She quickly pulls out the handle that drops the little compartment open, and even though there's all kind of junk in there, her eyes instantly zero in on the unopened box of condoms. _Shit, shit, shit! What have I done?_

She reaches for it, can't help but read over the package as if she's never seen one before. ' _Durex. Safe play. Vibra-ribbed. Made for her pleasure.'_

"Vibra-ribbed?" She repeats in a whisper to herself, a questioning tone to her voice. _Because what does that even mean?_

Her heart is bursting out of her chest now at the thought of this not only being a date, but in Jax's mind this is the kind of date that he brings a box of condoms along for. _Do girls really do that sort of thing with him on a first date?_

Her cheeks are flaming, yet the thought of him with other girls seems to have the effect of an ice bucket dumped over her head. She can't really stomach the thought of picturing him with anyone else, but at the same time she refuses to just be another conquest either.

Just then her eyes catch the doors to the store opening, Jax heading back outside and so she hurriedly shoves the box of condoms back into the glove box and to her relief manages to shut it just in time.

He's still pissed, that much is clear when he barely glances at her while he starts to fill up the gas tank, and honestly, after her little discovery in the glove box, she's too much in her own head to worry about his feelings at the moment.

Instead she wonders momentarily how she'd break the news to him that she isn't who he apparently thinks she is. That she isn't _easy_ , that she's never done _that_ before. She can practically picture the stupid look on his face at the revelation that despite her preceding reputation, she's never actually slept with Logan, her ex, or anyone else for that matter. _Sorry to disappoint, Teller, but I'm not the slut you think I am._

After what seems like forever, Jax finally climbs back inside, wordlessly starts the truck and starts driving. The way out of town towards Lodi, is the same that would lead back to Opie's place too, so Tara practically holds her breath, still hoping he'll make that turn towards his best friend's house, and she'll gladly just chalk the last fifteen minutes up to _temporary insanity_ on her part.

But no such luck, Jax drives on in silence, turning the radio up again to ease the tension in the air between them, and she wistfully turns her head, looking back over her shoulder towards the bypassed turn-off as if she could will him to realize his mistake and turn the truck around after all.

She glances over at him, watching him for a long moment, gathers all the bravery she can muster, and finally asks out loud what she's practically feared since the moment she's opened her front door to just him waiting for her. "So, Opie's not going with us?"

"What?" Jax asks back in surprise, finally looking back at her again for the first time since she's offered him money, before he has no choice but to focus his attention back to driving. "Why would you think Ope's going?" He asks her back in reply a moment later, glancing back and forth between the road ahead and her throughout.

Might as well tell the truth at this point, as stupid as it might sound. "Actually, I thought we were all going, you know? Opie, you, me, maybe even some of your other friends, all of us hanging out like we did before." She explains, searching his face and she can practically see the gears turning and the pieces falling into place when it all becomes clear to him as well.

He sighs deeply, slowly swiping a hand down his face before he looks over at her again. "Is that why you tried to pay for gas? 'Cause you thought this was a group thing?" He wonders out loud.

"Yeah." She admits, but doesn't say anything else, because she's honestly not sure what to say.

A beat or two passes, and Jax shakes his head just as they're passing the 'leaving Charming' sign, but to her surprise he pulls off to the side shortly after. Turning off the main road and down a dirt road that she knows for a fact isn't the way to Lodi. She looks over at him just as he slows down and then brings the truck to an abrupt stop before he puts the gear in park.

He meets her eyes now too, his eyebrows furrowed, his eyes perusing over her like they did when he'd first greeted her by her door. His gaze questioning, gauging her reaction when he finally says. "So, just to be clear. You only agreed to go out 'cause you thought Ope was taggin' along?"

Tara secretly pats herself on the back for holding his steely gaze and not shying away from the scrutinizing way he's watching her now. But still, even despite his arrogant assumptions that lead him to bring a box of condoms along on this date, she finds herself feeling bad about admitting the truth out loud, but in the end she still answers him truthfully. "Yes." She says in a huff, but instantly hates how his face falls at her admission. "I'm sorry, Jax, I misunderstood."

"Fuck." Jax cusses when he looks away from her and bangs his hands against the steering wheel in frustration, startling her when he does so.

Jackson Teller's known to have a temper, she's watched him get into fistfights from afar at a party every now and then, but she's never actually seen him get angry like this in just her presence, and if she's completely honest, she's not sure how to handle it. She's not scared of him, but she's just not sure what the right thing to say or do is in this situation.

"Why are you like this?" He suddenly asks with obvious frustration still in his voice, turning his head to meet her eyes again.

"Like what?" She responds in confusion, not understanding what he means by that.

"Like how you are?" He scoffs in reply, his eyes not leaving hers.

"And how am I exactly?" Tara asks back with a hint of irritation to her own voice now, feeling slightly insulted by what he seems to be hinting at. Is he actually mad because she's not like all those other bimbos that seem to trip over their own feet just to get his attention? If that's his problem he might as well turn this truck around right now, because this date might as well be over.

"Frustrating, aggravating, complicated as fuck." He blurts back suddenly in reply, letting all his pent up confusion about what she's concerned out when he adds. "You say you want to be friends one minute, crying in my arms, then out of nowhere you're avoiding me at all cost the next. You admit that you like me, even try to kiss me, agree to go out with me, only to turn around and tell me that you _misunderstood._ I fucking can't figure you out, Knowles." There's only so much he can take and he's reached his limit. _No more Mister Nice-Guy!_

She's momentarily stunt into silence, her mouth agape in shock at his characterization of her, yet what bothers her most deep down is that she can't help but feel there is some truth to what he's saying. Because she has enjoyed his company, she has confided in him, has literally cried in his arms, and then when she'd realized that she was getting in too deep with him she'd simply avoided him instead of coming out and telling him the truth. _He deserves the truth, doesn't he?_

But before she can even think of how to reply to that, he's already talking again. Not necessarily calmer, but not sounding quite as frustrated anymore when he simply asks. "Me asking you out, did I overstep? Freak you out?"

"It's not about that." She answers in frustration at Jax putting her on the spot like this before she tries to justify how they ended up here again, even though he already knows. "When you asked me about going to the movies and then Opie was right there talking about what's playing, I really did misunderstand. I really didn't think this was a date. I swear." Her eyes are pleading with him to understand that she hadn't meant to lead him on, or make him angry that this isn't what he thought it was.

"Alright, I get that." He replies, lowering his head in contemplation, his hands steepling in front of his face while he tries to think of what to say next to her. He sighs deeply and finally looks back up and meets her eyes again, searching her face for a long couple of seconds before he asks. "What I don't get is why you would've turned me down if you had realized that I was asking you out."

"You already know why." She answers him instantly, her eyes pleading with him to simply drop the subject and just leave it at that. Still mortified how she'd told him the truth in her drunken stupor.

But if the look he's giving her is any indication, she isn't that lucky. Apparently Jax wants to hash it all out this time. _No holds barred!_ "Because of Emma." He supplies the answer out loud that she clearly didn't want to discuss.

"Yes, okay, because of Emma. She likes you." She snaps back, at last, realizing ending this relationship with him once and for all might only happen when she finally lays all her cards out on the table, and explains her dilemma in a way that he'll understand. So she asks him in return. "Would you agree to go out with me if you knew that Opie liked me?"

"That's different." Jax scoffs.

"How is that any different?" She asks with a voice full of disbelief, but she doesn't give him a chance to answer right away. "We both already know you wouldn't, because he's your best friend." She answers for him instead, like he'd answered for her just moments earlier.

Jax does take a couple of seconds to think about it, but when he speaks, he does so without any waver or doubt in his voice. "If it was clear as fucking day that you weren't interested in him but in me instead, and he knew that I was interested in you too, then he'd suck it up, step aside and move the fuck on. That's what _my best friend_ would do." He pauses just for a second as if for added effect when he adds. "Besides, last I checked, Emma and you aren't even speaking anymore, so calling her your best friend is a bit of a stretch."

"That's because she, along with everyone else, assumed those rumors were true." She tries to defend her outfall with Emma, but it barely sounds true or reasonable to her own ears, even as she says it. There is more to their rift than just their mutual interest in Jax, but that's a whole other issue in itself that she doesn't want to think about right now.

"You and me going out right now, people seeing us together, ... that would just complicate all of that even more." She shakes her head at him in frustration, and admits ruefully at last. "I just can't. I want to, Jax, but I just can't."

"So that's it? You want me to take you home? You can't come see a movie with me? Really?" He asks in disbelief, trying to verify what she's saying. If she's being serious about this.

"I can't do anythingwith you." She replies sounding downright defeated.

"Jesus Christ, Tara, it's not like I'm asking you to climb in the backseat to fuck, ... it's just dinner and a goddamn movie." He replies and by his choice of words it's clear just how frustrated he feels at this moment.

She shoots him an almost angry glare at the way he's talking to her now, especially when she's considering the contents of this damn glove box right in front of her. And normally, under different circumstances Tara would never be so bold to do what she's about to, there is a line that she wouldn't cross, but she feels like she's not only fighting him on this, but her own self.

Truth be told, she's crazy about Jax, she knows she is, and that is why she needs to stay away from him, because she fears she can't trust herself around him. That drunken almost kiss in her bedroom just two nights ago being the obvious proof of that!

So she dares to contradict him about his crude remark he'd just made when she asks in return. "Oh really?" She flips the glove box open at once and practically shoves the small box of condoms at him in accusation before he even knows what hit him. "Tell me again how this isn't about you trying to get me in the backseat, Teller."

Jax stares at her in utter disbelief for just a split second, but it doesn't take him long to form the right reply when he chuckles. "Those aren't mine, babe." He can't help but smirk when he meets her eyes, barely able to hold back from actually laughing at the mortified expression that crosses over her face.

"What?" Tara looks back at him in confusion. "What do you mean?"

Jax looks downright amused now and turns the box over in his hands, inspecting it just like she had earlier but being much quicker about it and hands them right back to her. "Like I said, those aren't mine."

Tara blushes something fierce, realization hitting her at once that this was in fact not his truck, but it belongs to his friend Lowell instead. "Oh my God" She mutters under her breath, avoiding his eyes as she shoves the damn box back where she'd found it right away.

"You were snooping." Jax can't help but tease her and his words certainly add to her humiliation. "Didn't peg you for the snooping kind. I gotta remember that."

"Please shut up." She barks back before she tries to hide her mortified smile and her blushing cheeks behind her hands, wishing she could make herself invisible right about now.

He's grinning, so wide that he's baring his teeth, but tries his hardest to not actually laugh out loud at her embarrassment and instead just gives her a moment to get her shit together.

"Sorry." She finally admits after a long couple of seconds, letting out an audible sigh before she dares to lower her hands from her face and actually meets his eyes again. "It's just ..." She fumbles for a moment for the right words, but knows that in the end there is really no right way to say this. So she gestures to the back seat. "What was I supposed to think, I mean, you brought a blanket and pillows, Jax. And let's face it, you do have a certain reputation."

"Really?" He asks, sounding incredulous in return now, his eyebrows raised nearly to his hairline but the upward tilt of his lips lets her know he's still amused when he comments back. "Oh, you mean like your reputation? Like those bullshit lies and rumors that have been spread about you and me? Oh, and let's not forget about Ope too."

"Shit." Tara cusses, her hands hiding her face once more at the realization of how all of that sounded before she drops her hands for a second time to look at him. "Okay, fine. I got the wrong idea. Obviously, but ..." She sighs, then pauses for a second in thought, trying to find the right word to best describe him or rather how she feels about him whenever he's around her.

"But what?" He asks impatiently, clearly curious to hear what she's about to say next.

"But it doesn't change the fact that you're dangerous." She blurts out suddenly, looking right at him, but then instantly regrets having voiced that thought out loud like she just had, wishing she could take it back.

It's too late though, she has said it and now Jax is going to expect her to explain this to him somehow. She can feel her cheeks heating up again in a deep blush, already feeling flustered at the thought of how to do just that.

How did she even get here? From trying to explain to him why she can't be dating him, to revealing her deepest and certainly most embarrassing feelings about him. _Jesus Christ! This whole conversation is not going to end in her favor. She can't do this, not like this, not stone-cold sober._

"Dangerous?" He asks, but he's smirking again at that description of himself, kinda liking it - if only for a short moment.

"How exactly am I dangerous?" He inquires further, yet as soon as he's asked the question out loud, he suddenly wonders if this is about Samcro somehow. He hates the thought that rumors about his father's club, and all the bad shit that comes with it, has somehow even made its way to Tara's ears and has already begun to cloud her opinion of him. And with that thought, his smirk dims down to a barely-there smile just a split second later, because even though he can't wait to join the club, right now as a sixteen-year-old who's still going to school, he also despises some of the negative shit that comes along with that.

Not to forget having to fill his father's boots is something he's dreading with every fiber of his being too. _The prince, forever lurking in the shadow of the great John Thomas Teller._

Jax is poignantly staring back at her in wait of a response, because she can't just go and call him ' _dangerous'_ and then not elaborate in more detail what exactly she means by that. But he instantly takes that wish back once she actually starts to explain. "Like the night when Dunley broke into my house, and you beat him to a pulp, for example -."

"I saved you from that psycho that night." He blurts out interrupting her before she can say anything else. He should've expected for her to go there, should've probably seen it coming that that kind of physical violence might've scared her, just like it would scare most other girls he knew. But her admission still blindsides him a little because the fact of the matter is what he'd done that night was wholeheartedly to protect her. To keep her safe. So how could she hold that against him now afterward?

He still doesn't even give her a chance to say anything else though, at least not until he points out the obvious to her. "I literally saved your life, and now you're going to hold that against me? You're going to judge me for that?"

But having noticed his defensive voice and argument, she instantly realizes the mistake she's made with her choice of words and completely takes him by surprise when she finally clarifies what she really meant to say if he'd only allowed her to finish her thoughts out loud. She shakes her head at him again and blurts out in reply. "No, Jax, I'm not going to judge you for that, I'm going to want you for that."

Now this new revelation shuts him right up, leaving him speechless and taking him by surprise all over again.

She averts her eyes from him for a moment, blushing, flustered, and fumbling to find the right words to explain, before she finally looks back at him and against her own better judgment continues to admit her feelings out loud. "I find it hot as hell that you charged at him with just your knife and fought him to the ground and ... and even though I feel guilty, I also find it sexy as fuck that you have this scar on your arm now, forever reminding me that you got it protecting me." She gestures with her hand towards the still raised flesh and pink scar on his left forearm, but she does so from the safety of her side of the truck, not trusting herself to actually reach over and touch him right now. The sheer thought of running her fingertips across his skin is making her tingle all over in response.

But Tara's apparently still not done yet, unable to hold all of this stuff in any longer, she continues to babble on while Jax continues to stare at her like a deer caught in the headlights of a speeding car. "You see, that's why you're dangerous, because you make me feel things like that, even though I know that I shouldn't feel like that. And you make me want to forget about my best friend, even though I know that I shouldn't do that either."

She sighs deeply before she carries on. "You and I are very different. I know I sound crazy, or maybe I sound to you like I'm trying to play hard to get, but I swear that's not it, Jax. I'm just ... terrified of what might happen. For example, you don't care what people say or think, you don't care about these rumors, but _... I do_. I care, and I worry, ... I'll probably always worry. About everything. I think too much. I wish I didn't, I wish I could be more like you. You know, it seems like nothing matters to you. You're just ... fine. And you somehow get away with so much shit, that I would never ever get away with ... like the fighting for example, and ... and for you, none of it matters, because you're still going to pull off good grades, still show up for work, and life just goes on for you, ... while everything seems to be caving in on me. But you, ... you're just always the same. Like you said to me before, you let shit roll off your back, you're even-keeled. I wanna be able to be even-keeled, but I'm just not." She admits in exasperation, finally stopping to speak and allowing him to respond.

Jax is lost at first where to even start to address everything she's just thrown at him. He's obviously elated by the fact that Tara has basically just admitted that she's very attracted to him, but for now he'll have to push those thoughts on the back burner and address the other things she's mentioned first instead.

He shakes his head to himself at how ridiculously she seems to perceive him and his world. "Hate to be the bearer of bad news, babe, but I'm not even-keeled ... not even close, far fucking from it. And ... yeah, I might not sweat the small stuff and try to move on, that's true, but I've got shit that fucks with my head too, just like everybody else around us, I might just be better at hiding it, especially from the girl that I like. But, man, ..." He shakes his head to himself in thought again and chuckles a little. "If you were to ask Ope right now, he'd tell you that I've been chewing his ear off about this girl that I'm interested in, but for whatever fucking reason she seems to be hell-bent on keeping me at arm's length. What she's putting me through is fucking nerve-wracking." He jokes, winking at her.

Tara shakes her head and tries to suppress the smile that threatens to take over her face, not wanting to let his words get to her. But before she can even think of how to respond to him, Jax carries on, sounding incredibly serious that it wipes the smile right off of her face again as she listens to him and takes it all in. "So maybe you're right. Maybe your life's not simply, Tara, maybe shit does cave in on you, ... and maybe the reason you can't stop it from showing is because you're no fake. But I promise you, everyone's got shit they're dealing with, I'd bet that even your sidekick Emma's got skeletons in her closet she's trying to hide that you don't know nothing about. And yeah, maybe that means she's better at hiding her shit than you, ... or me. But the truth is, this whole damn town belongs to the Emma's, acting like they're perfect on the outside, while there's a shit-storm brewing under the surface, and I'm fucking sick of it, I'm sick of them. I'd much rather have a girl like you -."

"A girl like me?" Tara interrupts him this time, her eyebrows raised in question.

"Yeah, babe, a girl like you. Hot, sexy, irresistible, smart, fun, ... troublemaking, chaos causing, and most importantly real ... girl like you."

But Tara scoffs and interrupts him again when she shakes her head. "I'm none of those things you just said, except maybe the chaos causing."

At that Jax actually laughs out loud. "Yeah, you are, Knowles. You're all of those things and it's driving me insane that you're not even realizing it. You really are different, Tara, but in a good way. You're not like anyone I've ever met. And at the risk of making this sound like the most morbid fucking pick-up line ever, I swear for the first time after my brother and my dad died, with you around I feel different too. Maybe it's because you know what that shit was like because of your mom, you know? Or maybe it's something else, ... I don't know. All I know is that you make me want to enjoy my life again. My first thought when I wake up now is wondering when I'll get to see you."

It's sweet, so touching, and she can tell he's being completely sincere, once more allowing her a glimpse of yet another layer underneath all his bad-boy bravado. It melts her heart, truly, but what is she supposed to say now? How is she supposed to respond to something like that? This is all getting way too deep and way too real and she's never really intended to let this get this far, and that is exactly why she's been avoiding spending time with just him alone, because she knew she wouldn't be able to resist him. She knew he'd seriously fuck with her head and her heart all in the same damn breath, and she'd be at his mercy. _Now look at me._

Can she do this? Forget about Emma? Forget about her reputation? Just say _'fuck it'_ and see where this thing with Jax might lead if she'd allow him in closer? Is she crazy to even consider it?

On one hand, she knows the more time she spends with him, the more people will talk and with that she's risking what's left of her good-girl image and her carefully built life to further dwindle down the drain.

On the other hand, she meant what she said just a few minutes ago. That she wishes she could be the kind of person that didn't care what other people thought of her. Is she turning this date with Jax into a much bigger deal than it actually is? Or is it just too much for her right now, on top of all the other shit she's still trying to work through?

"I really wish you would say something already, babe, considering how I just poured my fucking heart out to you." He breaks into her thoughts, sounding a little nervous himself, which is eliciting the faintest of smiles from her.

"I'm not sure what to say." She admits shyly. _Because haven't we both said it all, already?_

He shoots her a little grin, knowing now that she's attracted to him he's hoping to win her over with his bad-boy charm when he proposes a few adequate replies for her. "You could say you'll give me a shot. You could say you'll go get something to eat with me. You could say you'll go to the movies with me. You know, ... just to name a few ideas off of the top of my head."

He pauses, biting his bottom lip for a moment in thought before he asks. "It's just a date, what's the worst that could really happen? That we're seen together? And people will think we're together? So what?" He quirked an eyebrow at her in question for a moment, but then he adds with a little chuckle. "I'll even promise to be a perfect gentleman and won't flaunt my _sexy-as-fuck_ scar in your face all night."

At that, Tara sighs and mumbles, "Oh my God" into her hands she's already hiding behind again. Regretting already to have gotten carried away and saying all of those things out loud to him, and now fearing he won't ever let her live this down. _What the hell was I thinking?_

"C'mon, babe. We could have fun." He adds suddenly with a more serious tone again, realizing that his teasing isn't exactly winning her over.

At last, Tara looks back at him before she admits. "You, Jackson Teller, might just be the most pushy person I've ever met, but I ... I think I might like what you're pushing for!"

He squints at her as if he's trying to interpret her reply when he wonders out loud. "Is that a yes, let's go ahead with our date? Or a no, take me back home right now?"

"It's a yes." She finally answers him and dares to meet his eyes across the small cabin of the truck.

"Yes what?" He replies, probably pushing his luck the way he's teasing her now with a mischievous look, even though he's already putting the truck back in gear to start driving again.

"Really? You're gonna make me say it?" She asks rather incredulously.

"Hell yes. After all that back and forth, I'm so gonna make you say it." He winks at her, then puts his hand behind his ear ala Hulk Hogan.

"This is all your fault. None of this would have happened if you'd have asked me _right_ to begin with. You know, with the actual word 'date' in the question." She replies instead, not yet giving in any further than she already has.

"Okay." Jax nods and glances her way for a second. "Fair enough." He clears his throat, giving her another look when he says. "Hey, Tara, wanna go out on a date with me? Like dinner, and a movie maybe?"

Tara rolls her eyes at him, but despite her best efforts she can't keep the corners of her lips from curving into a small smile when she finally says out loud. "Yes, sure. I'll go on a date with you, Jax."

Jax throws his head back in a carefree laugh that warms her heart along with other places, before he reaches blindly over towards her, tugging her hand up to his lips, pressing a kiss against her knuckles and admits something himself. "Jesus Christ, babe, this was the hardest I ever had to work just to take a girl out for food and a show."

Tara smiles brightly at his admission, but deep down she can't help but wonder if some of his fascination with her might just be about _the chase_.

X

Now that the air has finally been cleared between them, the rest of the drive to Lodi seems to become more relaxing with every passing second. The radio's still on, playing rather quietly in the background now because they're finally back to acting like their old selves, talking and laughing carelessly with each other about everything and nothing at all. Just like they had on the night of the party by the lake.

Neither of them will dare to admit it out loud but it feels almost surreal how simply they've both just fallen back into that rhythm they'd previously had. Getting along so effortlessly when they're both allowing their guards to be down.

It's fun and relaxing, and the words and lightheartedness of their conversation comes so easy when they're together like this, and yet at the same time their chemistry is off the charts, the air downright electrically charged every time they look at each other, or share just the simplest touch.

Once in Lodi, they decide to stop at the same diner for dinner as they did the night of the party. The place isn't packed and so they're taking their time ordering and eating burgers, fries, and at last shakes as desert. Jax is pleasantly surprised that Tara actually lets him pay the whole check this time without so much as a single word in protest. _That's definitely progress from the last time we've been here!_

But despite the good time they're having, Tara would be lying if she said that she doesn't notice the curious looks and whispers they seem to get from people their own age, who clearly must've heard about Jax and her someplace or another. It does bring forth the guilt she still feels because of Emma, who'll undoubtedly hear about it, along with whatever other rumors will sprout from being seen with him alone like this.

Then again, maybe she's got it all wrong. Maybe the looks and the whispers aren't really about her at all, but they're simply admiring and gushing about the notorious bad-boy of Charming, who just so happens to be her date tonight. _One can hope, right?_

It's already close to nine pm by the time they finally get up to leave the diner to head to the drive-in movie theater that's located not too far from here.

Jax surprises Tara when he reaches for her hand, intertwining his fingers with hers and tugging her along with him out the door.

Several eyes seem to follow them so blatantly obvious that even Jax can't help but notice them this time, but he simply leans down and whispers in her ear to reassure her. "Don't let them ruin our good time."

"I'm trying not to." She quietly admits in reply while looking up at him, but when she's rewarded with the sweetest smile from him in return, she can't help but ask. "What?"

"Did you just admit to having a good time with me?" Jax teases her, grinning from ear to ear, reluctantly letting go of her hand after he's pulled the passenger door open for her.

Tara shakes her head, smiling even more while she climbs inside the truck and glad they're already at a place where they can tease each other over their previous argument and embarrassing confessions. "You know, Teller, I really thought someone like you would have way better lines than that. Maybe you were right, maybe your reputation isn't all it's cracked up to be."

"You haven't seen anything yet, Knowles." Jax scoffs in faked outrage, shutting the door for her but rests his arms against her open window frame while he adds teasingly. "I'm just getting warmed up, babe. My best lines and moves are yet to come. You'll see."

X

Author's Note: I'm so glad I finally got to finish this chapter and post it. I'm always curious to hear your thoughts. They keep me motivated to keep writing. Thank you.


	14. Alright, scaredy-cat

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

On the drive over from the diner Jax had filled her in on what else was playing on the other screen, and even though Tara told him repeatedly that she'd be totally fine with _Braveheart_ and _Die Hard_ , much to her surprise when Jax pulled up to the window to pay he chose the second option instead, which was two back to back romantic comedies. _French Kiss_ and _While you were sleeping._

Jax had been right when he'd predicted that the drive-in theater wouldn't be as busy on a Tuesday evening, but it still surprised Tara to see that it wasn't quite as deserted as she'd thought it would be considering it was the beginning of a workweek and not even close to a weekend.

So now as Jax finally pulls the truck to a stop in the back of the grass and gravel lot, and commercials for local businesses start playing already on the big screen in front of them they find themselves tongue-tied again when they steal a glance at each other. Both of them are smiling - almost shyly - to themselves, but for different reasons.

Jax's smile is one of happiness, because he still can't believe he will finally get to have some alone time with her, and he can't help but be hopeful that a movie called _French Kiss_ will ultimately lead to just that with Tara.

All the while Tara's still contemplating her own sanity, wondering if she's made a big mistake agreeing to this or not. As much as she already seems to be falling for him, there's still this constant doubt in the back of her mind, not only reminding her about her friendship with Emma, but also making her wonder about Jax's true intentions and whether or not it'll be worth the risk to give this thing with him a real try.

Jax eases the sudden tension when he reaches over the seat to the back seat and pulls the two bags of snacks he'd brought with him. "I wasn't sure what you're into, so I bought a bunch of different stuff." He explains, then starts pulling things out to show her what all he's got. "We've got Slim Jims, Snickers, Twizzlers, M&M's, - peanut and plain -, Skittles, Laffy Taffy, Sour Punch Twists, Airheads, Reese's and Twix too."

"Wow," Tara smirks and shakes her head at him in amusement. "That's a lot of candy. Like Halloween came early." She adds, but then cringes inwardly at her embarrassing attempt at small talk, and bites her lip wondering how they seem to go through these bouts of talking like they've known each other all their lives, to being awkward again within just minutes. _Ugh ... damn those stupid butterflies in her stomach!_

"Yeah." Jax agrees completely unaware of her embarrassment, smirking as he places the bags on the seat in the middle between them, and adds. "Anything chocolate might be a bit melted by now though, sorry."

"Don't worry about it. Thanks for all this." Tara replies gesturing towards the candy, giving him a sweet smile. Then her eyes drift to the other cars and trucks mostly filled with teenagers, some she even recognizes, scattered around the theater lot again, and she suddenly realizes that this is what is making her feel awkward again, it's not being alone with Jax, but the possible audience she'll have while doing so.

"I didn't bring any drinks though. Did you wanna get some before the show starts?" Jax brings her out of her thoughts with his question and her eyes drift back to him to hear him add. "I'm big on popcorn too, so I'll definitely wanna get some of that."

"Yeah, sure," Tara replies and nods her head in agreement, before they both climb out of the truck at the same time, and slowly weave their way around the parked, and still parking vehicles towards the small building between the two lots that houses the concessions stand. 

Jax has his arm draped around her shoulders the entire way, and Tara can feel eyes following their every move even with rapidly approaching dusk.

X

Tara straightens out her clothes, her hand already on the little latch to unlock the bathroom stall door when one of the conversations in the ladies' room suddenly gains her full attention and stops her in her tracks the moment she hears Jax's name being mentioned. 

"It's just a matter of time before Jax gets back together with Amy again." Tara hears one girl's snarky remark.

"You think? He looks like he's into her, and I've heard rumors that they've been hooking up for a while now." Says the other girl in reply.

At those words Tara finds herself trying to squint through the small gap in the door to get a look at them since she doesn't recognize their voices at all, but to no avail, she can't see their faces from where she's at so she just continues to hold her breath and listens on.

"Pleeeease." Girl number one drags out the word in a condescending tone. "He does this every other month. Amy and him call it quits over something stupid, he goes off hooking up with some girl before he gets tired of her and ends up right back with Amy. I swear it's like clockwork with those two. This cheerleader chick is just his flavor of the week."

"Maybe." Says girl number two. "She's pretty, though." 

"If by pretty you mean she's got big boobs, then yeah, I guess. All guys like big boobs." Says girl number one in reply, then quickly adds. "I just don't get girls like her, I mean, why do girls keep throwing themselves at him."

"Because he's fucking hot, that's why." Girl number two interjects and they both can't help but giggle in response for a moment.

"Yeah, he's hot and can be really cute if he wants to be, so I get that, but he's also the kind of guy that'll just end up breaking your heart. He's got _trouble_ written all over him, you'd have to be blind not to see that. I mean, even Amy, who he keeps going back to, ... I wouldn't put up with that shit if I was her. I wouldn't be that stupid and keep taking him back after he's done dipping his thing in someone else. He might be hot, but let's face it, he's also kind of a dick."

"I know. You're right, Amy could do much better." Says girl number two after just a second of letting her words sink in, before their conversation starts to finally veer in another direction.

Tara remains frozen in place, contemplating her options for just a second. One, she could hide out in here until they leave and the coast is clear again. Or two, she could go out there and give them the cold shoulder, acting like their words and opinions don't mean shit to her, which is what the old her would do if her friends were here with her. Emma would never let someone talk shit like that and then just hide out from them.

She bites down hard on her bottom lip in indecision. When she had her best friend at her beck and call, this kind of stuff wasn't that hard to face, there was strength in numbers. But everything has changed somehow, her life's just upside down. She's still grappling with her emotions from being attacked, and also losing that friendship with Emma, but in turn, realizing who her true friends are, and last but not least trying to navigate through that minefield of emotions she feels for none other than Jackson Teller. It's quite the emotional rollercoaster ride. 

She finds herself feeling so unsure nowadays over literally everything, second-guessing every decision and emotion over and over in her head. There are days when she looks in the mirror and barely recognizes herself anymore, but she wants to. She wants to figure out who she is now, this new version of herself, the girl without Emma, the girl that survived some horrible shit, the girl Jax Teller is interested in. _The girl finally ready to admit she's interested in him too._

She's so tired of letting other people's opinions of her dictate how she should act, who she should see, or make her feel embarrassed and want to hide out. She's got nothing to feel embarrassed about, because what people are saying about her isn't even true, and after all, she's not the one in here talking trash behind another girl's back. _Fuck them!_

And with that last thought and before she can lose her nerve and change her mind yet again, Tara quickly unlatches the lock on the door and strides out of the stall and towards the sink with her head held high.

Out of the corner of her eye she can see the two girls' reactions when they realize that it's her and that she's been in there and has most likely overheard them. They pretty much freeze and fall mute now, at a loss for words at last, hopefully feeling embarrassed now that they realize just what she's overheard them say, not just about her, but Jax and even Jax's ex Amy too, who from the sounds of it is their friend. 

Tara's standing just a foot or two away from them when she washes her hands, looking herself over in the mirror as she does so, calm and collected on the outside, yet her heart is pounding erratically in her chest on the inside trying to keep up this charade. This feeling right here is new too, she used to not get _this_ nervous about possible confrontations.

She turns the water off and reaches for a paper towel, taking her time to dry her hands with it and tossing it in the trash. But she's still not done yet, it's all or nothing ... to hell with them, so instead of high tailing it out of there, she reaches in her little purse, pulling out her soft pink lipstick and is making a show of reapplying it, before she puts it away again while pressing her lips together as if she had no other care in the world at the moment. She then proceeds to run her fingers through her long dark hair, taking her time of fluffing and then smoothing it out, fully aware of the audience she has right beside her but putting on quite an Oscar-worthy performance of indifference. 

At last she even goes so far as to tuck down her tank top, revealing a little more cleavage than she did before, and if they wondered at all if she'd heard their comment about her boobs they certainly got their answer now. Then, finally, she turns and heads towards the door, but not before making eye contact and smirking almost deviously at both girls in passing. _Fuck you!_

She exhales in relief as the door falls shut behind her, momentarily proud with how well she handled herself in there while she steps down the hallway and scans the large open space to find her date. Thankfully the place isn't that busy so that she has no problem spotting Jax standing by one of the bar height tables near the doors, two drinks, and a large bucket of popcorn right in front of him. 

He hasn't noticed her yet because he's engrossed in a conversation with two guys she's seen around at parties and such, yet has never actually met or talked to before, and at once she's starting to feel nervous all over again.

She takes a steadying breath now, her footsteps small and slow while she's taking in the scene before her. Her eyes are roaming over Jax standing there, smiling and laughing at something, so carefree, so at ease, so damn confident with himself that she can't help but be envious of him for that. She wants to feel carefree, feel at ease with herself and the people around her, and wonders for a split second when the last time was that she felt like that, or if she's ever truly felt that way at all.

They're still laughing and talking, but the guys' eyes shift to her when she comes to stand beside Jax and they're looking her over with intense scrutiny, making her already regret the cleavage she's now displaying. It's probably just a nanosecond, a blink of an eye really, but to Tara it feels like forever until Jax turns his attention wholeheartedly towards her, giving her the sweetest of smiles and closes the distance between them by draping his arm around her neck and tugging her into him. 

"This is Tara." Jax smiles to his friends and starts making introductions, nodding his head and gesturing with his hand from one guy to the next as he rattles down their names to her, while Tara tries her best to temper her nerves down so she'll be able to remember their names.

Just then the two girls from the bathroom incident also step up to them, each girl obviously here with one of the boys, and what tiny little bit remained of Tara's confident persona she'd just put forth in that bathroom falters now completely as Jax introduces the girls to her as well, each of them smiling awkwardly as they nod at Tara in greeting.

Everyone seems friendly enough, at least it appears that way, but based on some obvious looks being exchanged between the girls, Tara knows better. And that knowledge is instantly confirmed when one of the girls, - girl number one who Jax has just introduced as Trish -, catches not just her but mostly Jax off guard when she says. "Amy almost came with us tonight. That would've been really awkward, Jax." 

"Trish." Ray, her date or boyfriend, says in warning, giving her a stern look, but Trish seems unaffected, ignoring her boyfriend's glare along with everyone else's temporary surprised expression.

Jax's smile slips for just a second at the mention of his ex, but then he sees the bitchy smirk Trish directs right at Tara and notices how Tara's body stiffens against him, so he quickly displays a rather smug expression in return. His voice is steely and clear as to not leave any doubt that he's confident what this particular matter is concerned. "Amy's not my problem anymore, Trish. She needs to move the fuck on." He glances down at Tara beside him, smiling. "I sure have." He adds matter-of-factly, pressing a little kiss against Tara's temple to reassure her, although Tara can't help but wonder if that was more for show than actually for her benefit. 

She feels awkward, out of place, and wants nothing more than to run from this encounter with his - and what appears to be Amy's - friends, but she knows that'd only make matters worse and so she won't. 

Thankfully, as if Jax can read her mind, he doesn't waste another second, quickly hands Tara her drink, clutches the tub of popcorn under his arm, and grabs his own drink with the same hand so that he can still take Tara's hand in his free one. 

"See you later." Jax nods at his supposed friends, yet shoots Trish a deathly glare, a silent dare for her to say another thing, before he turns his attention to his date. "Ready, babe?" Tara nods, so he nods towards the door. "Let's go."

Jax is already turned towards the exit, so unbeknownst to him the looks directed at her that follow from the girls are ones of sheer loathing, while the guys shamelessly check her out once more from top to bottom, smirking now too as if they are in on some kind of secret she isn't privy to. It's in that moment that Tara suddenly wonders if anything those girls said in the bathroom is true after all. Is this what Jax does, and all his friends know it? Are the rumors about him actually true? Is she just his flavor of the week? _Shit!_

Yet once they're through the door and back outside she relaxes a bit in relief when Jax slows down, turns towards her, and gives her an apologetic look when he says. "Sorry about that, Tara. Trish can be a real bitch."

Tara nods in reply. "She's friends with Amy?" It's a question, but it comes out more as a statement, because it doesn't take a genius to have figured that out.

Jax nods his head in reply. "Yup." As if that explains it all, and in a weird way it kind of does.

And with that this conversation ends again as quickly as it has started. It's pretty much dark out now, and apart from the occasional set of headlights, the huge screen that has started playing previews for upcoming movies is what's helping them find their way back to Lowell's truck. And it's this stupid silence between them now that allows the never-ending voices of doubt in her head to return and get louder and louder again with each step she takes as Jax pulls her along with him.

But the voices of doubt get interrupted when a male voice she's all too familiar with calls out her name like a question somewhere behind her and she can't help the way her spine stiffens at the sound. "Tara?"

"Tara?" The voice calls out again and Jax and her stop simultaneously, turning towards the boy calling out for her, but Tara already knows who it is long before she can make out his face and approaching figure jogging towards her. _Fuck my life!_

Her eyes connect with Jax for just a second, a silent apology for what she's sure will be just as awkward for him as her run-in with his and Amy's friends was just moments ago.

"Hey. I thought that was you." Logan says, taking her in from head to toe just like everyone else has done tonight before he steps into her personal space, wraps his arms around her and pulls her towards him.

"Hi," Tara replies, and lets go of Jax's hand to return Logan's rather awkward embrace with a one-armed hug while still holding her large drink wedged between her and him with her other hand. When Logan finally steps back she knows there's really no way to avoid the unavoidable, so she simply nods towards Jax beside her and asks. "You know Jax, right?" 

"Yeah." Logan glances or rather glares at Jax for just a split second, before he nods in acknowledgment and practically spits out the name as his version of a greeting. "Teller."

"Lockhart," Jax replies and nods at him as well, and even though Tara didn't see his facial expression, she could practically hear the bite of disdain in Jax's voice just saying her ex's last name out loud. _Great, this should be fun!_

But before Jax or Tara can say anything else, Logan's attention is wholeheartedly back on her when he asks, his voice soft and full of concern now. "How are you?"

"Good." Tara answers nodding, but Logan gives her a look of disbelief. "I'm good. Really." She adds, flustered to have this conversation she's been avoiding to have, yet has also envisioned having a million times over the last few weeks. But it's hard to know how Logan truly feels about her, whether or not he's still got real lingering feelings for her, or if this is just pity because of what had happened to her. But either way, she knows that she doesn't want to do this right now, whatever this is, in front of an audience. 

"I heard about what happened." Logan starts, reaching out yet again and running a soothing hand down her bare arm that seems to have the opposite effect and causes Tara's spine to stiffen out of sheer surprise. "I left you a bunch of messages."

 _Here we go!_ Tara lowers her gaze to the gravel-covered ground between them, not sure what to say, or rather how to say it, and wishes again she could just disappear into thin air. She's been wishing that a lot lately. 

"Why didn't you call me?" Logan further inquires, not letting her off the hook in the least, his voice now conveying blatant accusation that neither Jax, her, or anyone in a ten-mile radius could possibly have missed. _He's angry with her!_

"You know why," Tara replies, still averting her eyes from his and hating that he's putting her on the spot like this, in front of Jax and in front of countless other people they know. 

"Because we're broken up?" Logan asks or rather states the obvious with the same amount of anger as before, and Tara nods in agreement, looking up at him now as she does so.

Out of the corner of her eye she can see Jax raise a cigarette to his lips, lighting it as if he doesn't have a care in the world, and _fuck_ if it doesn't make her want to turn towards him and ask for one herself. She doesn't smoke, but she could sure use something to ease her nerves right now, finding herself envious once more of his cool demeanor.

Can't anything in her life just go right for one damn night? There's only so much controversy a girl can fucking take before the age of sixteen.

"I got your messages, Logan. And I know you wanna talk. I get that." Tara finally finds her voice, her eyes meeting his straight on. "But not here. Not right now."

"I was worried," Logan states, completely ignoring that she's just asked him to drop the subject when he says. "I'm still worried." And with that last sentence he throws a rather accusatory look at Jax before he adds. "I talked to Em, she told me about your fight. What the hell is going on, Tar? This isn't like you." 

The mentioning of her former best friend causes something to snap in Tara, all the restrained she's had on her emotions is falling away and she suddenly finds herself on the fence of either punching Logan square in the jaw for not letting this go or possibly bursting into tears right here and now, and even as she balls her hand into a fist at her side she fears it might just be the latter when her vision begins to get clouded by unshed tears.

Her clashing emotions must show on her face because before she can say anything or react in any way, Jax puts a stop to it all when he practically steps between the former couple.

At six foot one, 160 pounds of lean muscle he pretty much matches Logan's build and height, and so their faces are merely a few inches apart when he exhales a cloud of smoke through the side of his mouth and looks him right in the eyes.

Jax doesn't like the fact that this asshole wants to hash shit out with her now, even after she's pretty much just told him to drop it. His voice sounds calm yet serious enough to get the point across that he isn't happy about Logan intruding on his date with Tara. "Look, she just told you she doesn't wanna talk right now. Get the hint, man."

 _Jesus Christ!_ Tara can already envision the bucket of popcorn and his drink going flying, almost surprised it hasn't hit the ground already just for show. But then again, that would probably take away from this _cool-hand-Luke_ persona Jax seems to be channeling right now.

A silent, tension-filled beat passes between the two teenage boys and even without looking to confirm so, Tara can feel countless eyes on the three of them now. Drawing any more attention to herself is literally the last thing she wants right now and she really hopes Logan will see reason and not provoke any more of a response from Jax, or from her for that matter. 

To her relief Logan finally looks away from Jax's angry glare and meets her eyes over the blond teenage boy's shoulder instead. "I'll call you tomorrow." And Tara simply gives him a curt nod.

"Alright then. Glad that's figured out." Jax not having seen her nod replies in her place, smirking a little in amusement as he now takes a step back right next to Tara, taking one last drag from his cigarette before tossing the bud to the ground and draping his free arm around her shoulders to pull her closer again, his attention now solely on her. "Ready, babe? I think the movie's about to start."

"Yeah," Tara replies on an exhale, just now realizing she's been holding her breath. She's glad this awkward encounter has come to an end thanks to Jax's intervening and allows him to pull her along with him back to the truck without giving Logan so much as another glance. 

They're settled in the vehicle just a few moments later, after Jax has attached the little speakers on the open window on either side.

The movie is in fact starting now and Tara's glad that the attention they've gathered just moments ago is now on the big screen up ahead instead.

They sit close to each other near the middle to easily share the popcorn and candy, and in no time at all Jax somehow helps her forget all her worries again by laughing out loud, and in turn making her laugh too, at the stupid and kind of ridiculous scenes playing out in front of them.

In the midst of it all though, during a rather quiet scene, Jax turns towards her and asks her just once in a near whisper. "You're okay, Knowles?"

A genuine smile stretches across her face when she nods back at him in reply and says. "I am now."

"Good." It's all he says in reply, wipes his hands clean on his jeans before he simply takes her hand in his, lacing their fingers as if it's something they've done a million times before.

And that is pretty much all he does. Despite his earlier teasing about his ' _lines and moves'_ , he hasn't tried anything else with her. Hasn't tried to cop a feel, hasn't tried to steal a kiss, hasn't done anything that would remind her of the ugly words those girls had spewed in the bathroom earlier and would potentially put her back on edge, and considering everything else that has happened so far Tara's actually relieved that he hasn't.

As much as she tries to not let her feelings for him get to her head, she also knows that if something real is going to come from this, she wouldn't want it to start like this, right here under the scrutiny eyes of her ex, the friends of his ex, along with whoever else is watching them.

Considering the circumstances under which they've come to know each other better, - her getting attacked -, it's not unreasonable to wish for a bit more romance in the air instead of dirty looks and awkward encounters on the night they'd decide to take this further.

So for now, feeling his strong hand simply holding onto hers in the cab of this truck is just what she needs, and she's so glad that he seems to get that without her having to say so out loud.

X

Tara steps out of the bathroom, glad to see Jax is done too and already waiting for her and ready to get back before the second movie starts.

She sees Logan with a group of friends in line at the concession stand, but she quickly averts her eyes to avoid another confrontation and lets Jax lead her through the doors back outside.

Jax pulls on her hand, tugging her closer to him before he lets go and drapes his arms around her shoulders like he did earlier tonight instead, walking in comfortable silence now.

They make it all the way to the truck when Jax is angling his face down towards her ear and whispers. "Wanna get out of here? Skip the second movie?"

Tara glances up at him, noting his little smile but also the unsure expression that crosses his face when she studies him further, her voice equally low when she asks in reply. "And do what instead?" If he's thinking about getting more to eat she might burst.

"There's something I wanna show you." He answers her the same instant he pulls the passenger side open for her and steadies her by her elbow helping her get in.

Tara settles into her seat, pauses in thought because her nerves are beginning to get the best of her again as she watches him round the front of the truck to climb in himself. The look he's giving her now as he waits for her to answer is way too damn serious for her liking, so in an attempt to lighten the mood again she smirks when she asks with obviously feigned suspicion. "This _something_ , it's not your bedroom, or ... it's not _something_ in your pants, right?"

Jax laughs out loud at that for a long moment, then finally smirks back at her when he simply shakes his head. "No, it's not. I promise." But then he raises his eyebrows at her almost instantly, chuckling again before he pretends to reach for his belt and starts to say. "Unless you want me to ..."

"Jax." Tara blurts out his name in warning, interrupting him before he can finish that sentence out loud when she backhands him playfully in the chest, laughing herself despite the heat she can feel on her cheeks now at the thought of him undoing his pants right here in front of her.

"Alright, alright." He raises his hands in mock surrender, still chuckling, but then is already starting the engine of the truck even though she hasn't actually answered him yet and glances back over at her again clearly waiting for a real reply now. "I promise it's nothing like that. You in? Or you rather stick around and watch Sandra Bullock watch some guy sleep for the next hour and a half?"

"No, ... I mean, yes, I'm in." Tara agrees all too willingly now, but then she catches Jax's smirk when he looks over his shoulder to back up the truck and she suddenly wonders if she has just made a pact with the devil himself.

X

"Trust me, it's perfectly fine." Jax reassures her with a comforting voice as they drive through the wide-open gate and right past the oversized and reflective 'No trespassing' sign that's rather hard to miss. 

"Famous last words," Tara mutters as she looks over her shoulder, left and right, taking in the darkness that surrounds them on either side out here in the middle of nowhere, the gravel crunching beneath the tires as the truck continues to roll further down the old dirt road. 

It's both so freaking terrifying and yet strangely exhilarating to knowingly break the law with him, Tara muses to herself when she glances over at him for a long moment, wondering why she does in fact trust him. _'It's because he saved your life!'_ The little voice inside her head speaks up and for once she can't argue with it. That thought both warms and begins to calm her rapidly beating heart again.

Jax brings her out of her thoughts when he slowly brings the truck to a full stop and puts it in park, cutting the engine, then the radio and flicks off the headlights too, leaving them in complete darkness, with just the sound of the wind rustling through the grass, trees and shrubs and insects chirping around them.

"You gotta blink your eyes a few times." He instructs her and she does as he says, relieved to see that her eyes begin to adjust to the dark and she's able to actually see again.

Without another second to spare he reaches behind him over the seat, grabbing the heavy blanket and the two pillows, handing one of them over to her before he opens his door and starts to climb outside, blurting a simple "C'mon, let's do this" at her over his shoulder as if that is all the explanation or encouragement she'll need to follow him blindly along.

Tara's not sure what is happening but before her mind comes up with all the worst-case scenarios she simply follows her gut feeling and climbs out as well, the tall grass on the side of the gravel road brushing up against her bare legs as she's following Jax to the back of the pickup. 

He has opened the tailgate, climbed up into the otherwise empty bed of the truck and is already arranging the blanket as if he's fixing up a bed for them to get cozy in, and the butterflies in Tara's stomach are going completely haywire as she takes it all in, in stunned silence. 

A moment later Jax walks back over to her, plucks the pillow she's holding right out of her hands, tossing it forcefully towards the back of the cabin, where it lands right next to his pillow that's already lying there waiting before he holds out both his hands for her to take.

She's staring rather perplexed at his outstretched hands that are reaching for her and hesitates for a brief moment before her heart reminds her head that this is in fact Jax, her _knight in shining armor!_ The one boy who she's sure would never do anything she didn't want him to do, but ... _oh fuck_ ... therein lies the problem for her, because despite all the protesting she's been doing, if she's completely honest with herself she's suddenly not so sure that she doesn't want to give in to all those naughty possibilities with him that have began whirling around in her head. Would she be able to tell him _no_ if it comes down to it?

So despite the voices inside her head screaming at her in warning she decides against her better judgment, and in a move that is so very unlike her and contradicts how she's always viewed herself she throws caution to the wind, and instead of turning and running she takes a step closer instead and reaches her hands up for him to help her into the bed of the pickup truck at last. 

Not allowing her a chance to change her mind and chicken out on him, Jax is already bending over at the waist and has wrapped a strong hand around one of her biceps, pulling her up just enough for him to wrap his other arm firmly around her back and pull her all the way onto the back of the pickup and right into his arms. Her arms wrapped around his neck on their own accord, afraid he might drop her, but the nearness of his body like this, his soft breath on her neck along with the fact that they're completely and utterly alone out here causes every nerve-ending in her body to tingle like never before.

"T-thanks." Tara slightly stutters, feeling like her whole body is suddenly on fire when she comes to a stand on her own two feet right in front of him, his hands still on her waist and her hands still clutching onto his forearms to steady herself.

She wants to step out of his hold and inwardly scolds herself for the fact that the way he's just manhandled her as if she doesn't weigh a goddamn thing is turning her on like nothing ever has before, but then she also fears if he was to let go of her right now she might fall right off of the back of this damn truck from the swooning she's currently experiencing.

"You okay?" He asks, sounding serious enough when he's studying her expression, taking in her flushed cheeks, but then a slow smirk starts to stretch across his lips and it's in that moment that she's beginning to catch onto him.

Oh yeah, by the look on his face it's clear that he knows exactly what kind of effect that little maneuver just had on her and it strangely sobers her enough to finally regain her wits. "Yeah, I'm fine." She replies and lets go of him as if the touch of his skin has scalded her, and in a strange way it kind of has. She crosses her arms in front of her chest now as she takes a small step back so he'll hopefully drop his hands from her waist too.

He's not at all deterred by her sobering answer, but he does let go of her waist and reaches for one of her hands instead, leaving her no choice but to uncross her arms again when he turns and tugs her down onto the blanket with him, commanding her to sit down in the same instant he does. 

She does follow him and kneels rather hesitantly down on the blanket beside him, but not without bringing voice to the obvious question at hand. "What is this? What are we doing?"

But before he answers her with his words, he simply lies down right beside her, stretching his long body out over the length of the blanket as if he doesn't have a care in the world, resting against one of the pillows he's brought along, but with one arm bend behind his head to prop himself up just enough to meet her eyes better, taking in her furrowed brows as she's trying to make sense of this. "Stop overthinking it, Knowles. I promise this isn't what it looks like." He finally says, making the motion of a cross over his heart with the tip of his index finger while he's still holding her gaze and then juts his chin towards the empty pillow beside him. "Lie down, look up, take a deep breath and relax." 

She hesitates while she's drinking him in just laying there, that opulent confidence of his she wishes she could emulate on full display.

"Fine." She finally huffs her agreement, acting much more reluctant than she actually still is as she carefully takes the place alongside him, lies back against the pillow, her legs slightly bend at the knee and looks up above like he's instructed her to do.

The audible sigh that escapes her mouth is completely unintentional when she puts all her worries aside and allows herself to truly take in the ridiculous star-filled night sky right above them. Her body's still tingling from his earlier touch, her cheeks still flaming too, so she's glad when he spares her any further embarrassment and doesn't tease her about her reaction at the sight above them, like she'd pretty much expected him to do. 

Instead he's just quiet, utterly silent, his legs crossed at the ankles, lying completely still, and staring up into the night sky in awe just like she is. And Tara realizes that she is bearing witness to yet another layer of his bad-boy persona being peeled away, giving her a glimpse of the contemplative star-gazing side of Jackson Teller. She would've never imagined him to be like this, and it strangely warms her heart that he allows her to see and experience this meditative side of him.

They remain like this for a little while longer, neither of them speaking, completely content to just lay here next to one another and gaze up at the stars above, wordlessly trying to sort out the thoughts in their own heads.

The quiet eventually comes to an end when Jax reaches into the pocket of his jeans, pulls out a small, but already rolled joint, quickly lights it, and turns his head over towards her for the first time since she's gotten comfortable on the blanket right next to him. He takes a long drag, then holds the joint wordlessly out to her in a silent offering.

Tara hesitates for a brief moment, remembering her promise to her dad about staying out of trouble and not doing anything stupid. But she's not driving, she's not drinking and it's just Jax here with her, ... at least that's what she tells herself to justify giving into temptation when she reaches for the joint and brings it up to her lips to take a deep drag as well.

"So?" He starts raising his eyebrows at her as if that one little two-letter word is question enough, but before she can form any sort of reply he's exhaling a cloud of smoke into the night sky without ever taking his eyes off of hers and further elaborates. "What do you think?" 

She realizes that he isn't asking her opinion about the weed but rather the _something_ he has brought her all the way out here to admire with him. The countless sparkling stars up in the sky right above them.

She exhales too before she answers him. "It's really ... nice." Tara replies for a lack of a better word, giving him a sweet, almost shy smile, but then feels the need to add. "I'm really glad you brought me here, and showed me this."

"Me too." He answers her back, granting her with a matching smile in return, but when she holds the joint back out for him to take again, he raises his hand gesturing he's good, shakes his head at her in refusal, and says. "Go ahead, finish it." And so she does. 

What follows next is a lengthy conversation about lights within town and why you can't see the stars like this from within Charming itself. Along with both of them contemplating various other locations off the beaten path within a fifteen-mile radius that might or might not allow a similar stunning view in a cloud-free sky this late at night. 

Their conversation moves on to the movie they watched, what they liked and didn't like, which then leads to Tara schooling Jax on all the other movies Meg Ryan has starred in which she swears are so much better than this movie they saw earlier tonight. "Sleepless in Seattle ..." She says looking over at him and admits. "... makes me cry every damn time."

And then their talk pretty much leads from one subject to the next, other actors, other movies, books turned into movies and so on and so forth. It's easy and carefree and neither of them feels like they have to second guess how to explain what they're trying to say.

Once again they've fallen back into that comfortable state of togetherness and playful banter they keep coming back to whenever they're alone like this, and the words just tumble out uncensored without a worry of reprimand, because they just _get_ what the other one is trying to say, so nothing is misunderstood.

"A-hhoooooooooooo." The unmistakable sound of a howling animal off in the not too far distance suddenly interrupts their quiet chat, catching both of them by surprise.

"Did you hear that?" Tara asks at once while propping herself up on her elbows first before she's sitting all the way up just a split second later. The question is really just rhetorical because she knows there is no way Jax hasn't heard it too.

"It's just coyotes, babe. They're all over the place out here." Jax tries to reassure her, and simply shrugs his shoulders as if it's not that big a deal, but follows suit and sits up now too, looking around.

"A-hhoooooooooooo." The sound echoes through the dark night again, causing them both to look around more vigorously now, taking in the overgrown land surrounding them on all sides, but with all the shrubs and trees and rocky valleys, it's hard to pinpoint which direction the noise actually seems to be coming from. 

"Or it could be wolves," Tara states with a hint of nervousness to her voice now as she looks over at Jax to read the expression on his face in the moonlight. 

"It's not wolves," Jax states in reply as if he knows that to be a fact, but before he can add anything else the sound echoes through the countryside again, but sounding a bit louder and a bit closer now than just a short moment ago and it startles Tara enough that she instinctively scoots closer towards him, her hand blindly reaching out for his when she says. "That sounded closer." 

Jax still doesn't feel like this warrants real concern and tries to defuse some of Tara's alarm with a little bit of humor instead. "C'mere, Knowles. Sit." He orders her and wraps his arms around her waist, pulling her to sit between his legs right in front of him, her back to his chest.

It's not that she doesn't like to be in his arms but her immediate concern is still on whatever is making that horrible sound, so she's already glancing back at him over her shoulder and doesn't miss a beat when she asks. "Sit here? Why?"

"Well, ..." Jax muses, barely able to keep the chuckle out of his voice when he explains. "That way I can use you as a human shield and they'll eat you first."

"Jax." She blurts out in disbelief as she whips around in his arms and playfully slaps her open-palmed hand into his chest, but he's simply laughing out loud and completely unfazed by her outraged expression, so she adds. "That is so not funny. You'll be so sorry and feel like shit if I actually get bit. You'll see." 

"A-hhooooooooooooooooo." There it is again, causing Tara to startle and she presses herself closer against him again, and this time even Jax can't deny that it's sounding like it might really be getting closer. 

"Alright, scaredy-cat." He relents even though he's still not believing they're in any real danger at the moment, and also secretly enjoying the way she's seeking refuge in his embrace. He's rubbing his warm hands up and down her upper arms from behind her to comfort her for just a moment before he pushes himself up to his feet and says teasingly. "Let's get back in the cab before the wolves snatch us up."

Tara's not amused at all by his words, but she doesn't argue when Jax pulls her up to her feet too, her hand holding onto his as he's leading her the few steps back to the tailgate with him. He quickly jumps down from the truck, turns and reaches up for her, his hands circling around her small waist before he lifts her down to the ground with the same ease he'd pulled her onto the truck earlier.

Tara cautiously looks around, one of her hands fisting the fabric of his t-shirt to keep him close, or to keep close to him, while he hurriedly shuts the tailgate with a loud clunk that echoes through the otherwise quiet darkness.

His arm is wrapped around her when he ushers her over to the driver side with him, helps her climb up and inside before scooting onto the seat right after her, and shutting the door rather quickly at her insistent urging. 

Tara wastes no time and hurries to lean towards the passenger door, cranking the lever to roll up the window at least halfway, and shoots a look back at Jax over her shoulder with a wordless plea for him to do the same on his side.

The howl echoes around them once more in that very moment, and Jax quickly rolls up his window halfway too just to appease her, but tries to reassure her of her safety at the same time when he says. "We're perfectly safe here. I promise."

Tara lets out a sigh as her body visibly relaxes again when she sinks back against the indigo-colored vinyl seat, but she still scans the outside with a scrutinizing gaze just to be sure. 

Jax watches her quietly, wondering where to go from here because he honestly doesn't want this night with her to end just yet. He follows her gaze when she squints to read the time on the dashboard. She glances over at him, wanting him to confirm. "It's past midnight?"

"Yeah, it is." He nods in reply, then wonders out loud. "What time's your curfew?"

"I told my dad I might get home really late because Braveheart's like three hours long by itself." She explains and then shakes her head along with the rest of her reply. "So I don't really have a curfew tonight. You?"

He chuckles at the thought of his mom trying to reinforce a curfew with him. "No. My mom thinks I'm crashing at Ope's."

"Thinks?" Tara questions his choice of words, looking back at him confused.

"I mean, she knows _I am_ crashing at Ope's ... _later_." He tries to explain what he meant by that, while leaving out the part about his mom having no idea that he's out on a date with someone, let alone Tara Knowles.

The howling beasts outside are all but forgotten now, when Jax's ocean blue eyes connect with her emerald green ones in the darkness of the truck cabin, and they hold each other's gaze for a long silence filled moment in some sort of unspoken challenge. Either one of them daring the other to make the first move. 

And the sexual tension between them suddenly rises to new heights when Jax takes her hand in his, brings it up to his lips for a sweet kiss before his lips curve into a suggestive smirk when he asks her. "What do you wanna do now, babe?" Tossing the proverbial ball he's just picked up back into her court instead.

Tara doesn't answer him, at least not with words. Instead she simply scoots even closer towards him, even though her head is swimming with possibilities of where this all might lead. But none of those thoughts stops her from leaning into him, and he does the same, leaning in as well, their lips like heat-seeking-missiles with just seconds to spare before the unavoidable collision.

But just as that is about to happen, their lips so close that they can already feel each other's breath against their face, they're abruptly yanked back to reality when the distinct sound of a police car siren disturbs their intimate moment.

Both Tara and Jax whip their head around at once in the direction of the sound, and the alternating blue and red lights that come closer, before the police car comes finally to a complete stop right behind their truck.

Jax shakes his head and curses under his breath. _"Motherfucker!"_

X

Author's Note: I can't wait to hear your thoughts on it. So please leave me a few words if you have a minute to spare. It keeps me motivated to continue writing and I appreciate it so much. Thanks!

P.S. Does anyone still remember Jax mentioning this first date with Tara in my other story? He muses a little bit about it in the second half of chapter 19 of 'You and me and our boys'.


	15. Good girls finish last

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

"Watch your fingers." The police deputy warns her before he quickly slams the backdoor of the police car shut, right in Tara's disbelieving face. Her eyes are wide, mouth still open in shock yet no words come to her, she's speechless, all the while Jax doesn't seem to be all that surprised, taking it all in with raised eyebrows from right beside her.

This is not what she had intended to happen when she'd practically begged the cop to allow the pair of them to wait _'inside'_. She'd meant, and hoped they would allow Jax and her to get back into Lowell's truck to avoid the howling wildlife that's clearly still somewhere nearby, but instead her panicked request has backfired at her, at them, completely, to say the least.

"I'm so sorry, Jax." She whispers beneath her breath, but with only the engine idling and the sirens turned off again, Jax can hear her just fine within the confines of the cop car's backseat.

Tara's shaking her head to herself, still at a loss for words about what has just happened. She wants to explain to him that she didn't think they'd practically get thrown into the backseat like this, wants to plead with him not to be mad at her naive stupidity when the damn howling coyotes startled her yet again. The sentences are already forming in her head, but when she ruefully turns her gaze to her right to look up to meet Jax's eyes, at last, she's more than surprised by what she finds and it stops her from speaking out.

Jax is smiling, ... no, actually, he's not just smiling, he's downright smirking back at her. There's unabashed amusement etched into every feature of his face, but before she can try to make sense of it, or try to think of what to say to him now, he's already beating her to the punch when he practically chuckles. "And here I thought I was getting _you_ in trouble."

"Oh God, ... I'm so sorry." Tara pleads, her tone of voice apologetic, despite him clearly taking the situation much more in stride at the moment than she is. "But everyone's got something they're really scared of, and for me that's spiders, heights, and apparently also freaky howling creatures, ... so I just panicked when they told us to get out of the truck again. I really didn't mean for us to get arrested."

"We haven't been arrested. No cuffs." He says and raises his uncuffed hands in front of him for show. "At least not yet anyways." He then adds as an afterthought that causes Tara to groan out in dismay, raising her own uncuffed hands to hide her face away, in both embarrassment and alarm, which causes him to chuckle yet again.

Jax lets out an actual laugh when she fights him as he tries to pry her hands from her face. It doesn't take long and a moment later she relents, dropping her hands like he wants her to, but when he sees the pitiful look she gives him he tries to reassure her with a more comforting tone of voice. "Don't worry. It'll be okay."

"For you maybe," Tara interjects, holding his gaze once more. "But if they call my dad I'll be grounded for the rest of the summer, ... hell, maybe even the rest of the year." She adds scoffing, sounding more terrified than amused at the thought of her father's possible wrath.

"Right." Jax nods thinking over what she's just said. It would certainly throw a wrench in his plans to spend the summer with her if she'd end up getting grounded over this, not to forget how James Knowles will feet in regards to him. _Her old man is going to kill me!_

He shifts in his seat, craning his neck to look over his shoulder and out the back window, taking in the four deputies from Charming PD, just standing there by the other car, talking and taking their sweet ass time, but their carefree demeanor seems to reassure him again that they're really not in that much trouble. Neither of them has been drinking, there's no alcohol in the truck, they smoked the only weed he'd brought with him so there's no evidence of that either, and he's almost 99.9% sure that Oswald isn't going to press trespassing charges.

"Look, babe, ..." Jax starts while connecting with her eyes again, then pauses as he's gently brushing a strand of her hair behind her ear, letting his fingers drift down her neck to linger there while he palms her jaw to keep her face turned towards him.

Tara shivers at the unexpected tender touch, but tries her best to not let the feelings that bombard her get to her head. Instead she's waiting with bated breath for him to finish what he's about to say to ease her worried mind, and he doesn't disappoint when he recites what she'd heard him say to the cops earlier. "Like I already explained to the cops, my family knows the guy who owns this land, and I've been out here enough times to know he ain't gonna press charges for trespassing. Other than that, they got nothing on us. No harm, no foul, and no reason for them to even call your old man."

"I hope you're right." Tara can't help but wonder out loud.

"I usually am," Jax replies jokingly, cupping her cheek with his hand now to still keep her focus on him, smiling brightly at her again when he can hear Tara letting out a little sigh as a result of his reassurances.

"Okay." She nods and says with newfound calmness in her voice, because she truly wants to believe that Jax is right. It's like he said, they haven't been told they've been arrested, they haven't been read their rights, and they haven't been put in handcuffs either. She's seen enough movies and TV shows to know that all those observations make a valid point, trespassing would be the only charge and if the guy is cool with Jax being out here then hopefully it will all work out in their favor.

Jax's hand drops from her face when she twists around and looks over her shoulder too for just a second. She's taking in the deputies that don't seem to pay them any mind at all, instead, they're laughing about something and the sight does reinforce Jax's theory that this will all work out in the end.

A moment of silence stretches on between them, the rotating lights from both cars casting everything in alternating red and blue hues, adding an oddly surreal feeling to the situation they've found themselves in. Sit and wait is quite literally all they can do at this point, but in this instance the quiet seems to make the waiting almost unbearable, because it allows too much room to worry.

Trying to take her mind off of it all, Tara speaks up about another worry, bringing voice to the question that has suddenly come to her the more she thinks about what Jax has said. "So, you said you've been here a few times before?"

"Yeah, I have." Jax interrupts, assuming she's still worried about the possible trespassing charge. "Trust me, they're gonna let us go."

"So ..." She starts again, but then pauses and searches his face before she finishes her actual question out loud. "Exactly how many girls have you brought out here before?"

Jax looks perplexed at her question, hadn't seen that change in subject coming at all, but he raises his eyebrows and even smiles a little too as he repeats it. "How many girls have I brought out here with me?"

"Yes," Tara says with a firm voice, but she then tries her best to not let the disappointment show on her face when Jax looks down at his outstretched hands, whispering numbers to himself while he seems to make a show of silently counting on his fingers. _Shit!_

But then he suddenly stops and looks right back at her, meeting her eyes when he asks. "Including you?"

Tara swallows the lump that has formed in her throat, because she didn't want this to be true, didn't want to be one of many, just another number, another notch in his belt, but she still quickly nods to get her answer. "Yes, including me."

"Well, including you it'd be just one." He says with a smirk on his face, letting all his fingers curl into a fist, except his right index finger that he's holding pointedly up for show to symbolize a _one_.

"Really?" Tara blurts back almost instantly, but she can't help the shy smile that seems to form on her lips against her will, even before he nods his head at her.

"Yeah, really. You're the only girl I've ever brought out here, Knowles." He reaffirms his answer, not liking the lingering doubt he'd heard in her voice despite her smile, and so his own smile falters when he shakes his head a little at her and asks. "You really think I'm some kind of player, don't you?"

Even with the red and blue flashing lights obscuring his face she can still see the hurt caused by her lingering doubt in him, and it twists something painfully inside her chest. "No, no." She quickly shakes her head at him, clasping his left hand with her right, and it's the first time that she's initiating that kind of contact, other than when she got startled earlier by the howling.

"I just ..." She starts, but then bites her lip uncertainly because she's not sure how to say this without further upsetting him.

"You just ... what?" Jax asks back instantly, he's no longer smiling but still curious to hear what she was about to say.

Tara sighs and looks down at her hand wrapped around his, before she dares to meet his eyes again just a second later. "I just ... I don't want to be one of many."

Jax doesn't even have to think before he quickly replies. "You're not, Tara. I swear."

Her heart speeds up at the thought of him telling the truth. _God, I hope it's true!_

He turns his whole body more towards her and Tara can't help but do the same. And once more he raises his hand up to brush her hair back, yet resting it there in the nape of her neck to keep her focused on him, and holding her gaze for a long quiet filled moment again too, until they both can't help but smile just a little at each other. It starts out sweet and shy, but quickly turns incredibly intense a moment later.

"You know, this is also the first time I'm in the back of a cop car with a girl." He adds, grinning almost devilish now.

"Really?" She asks again, but unlike before her voice is full of teasing and amusement now, instead of doubt.

"Yeah, really. Ope's usually my partner in crime." He elaborates further while his grin slowly begins to morph into a smile the longer he continues to hold her penetrating gaze, his face inching closer to hers as he speaks. "But you being here with me is a hell of a lot better."

Tara completely ignores the sudden knowledge that he seems to have had a brush with the law before, because there's simply too much else happening right now for her to focus on that. She's drawn to him, feels her heart accelerating, goosebumps forming all over too, and yet she can't pry her eyes away from his. She doesn't want to want him, doesn't want to need him like this, but the truth is that she does, and she finally allows herself to act on it and leans in too, until their lips meet at last.

They both close their eyes, the side of their noses brushing against each other when their soft full lips press together in a sweet and gentle kiss. They linger like this, suspended in place and time, either one too cautious to push or pull in any way, not wanting to be the one to cause this moment to end again too soon.

But then a car door slams shut behind them, and it does break the kiss, but certainly not the spell they seem to be under now. They both pull away as if they've been caught, his hand slipping away from her neck, both turning their heads at the interrupting sound, only to realize that the cops are still talking amongst themselves and have not caught on to what is happening in here with the two of them.

They look back at each other again, mischievous blue eyes meeting green ones, shyly smiling at first as if they both can't believe this just happened, until reality settles in and both their smiles grow wide at the realization that it has - in fact - happened, ... hell, Tara might've even let out a giggle.

For once Tara's smile is big and genuine and so completely unguarded that it makes Jax's heart skip a goddamn beat.

He drinks in the image of her, can't help himself from wanting to file this moment away to his memory and not wanting to miss a single detail about her. Her long brown hair falling in loose waves around her shoulders. Contradictory to the blue and red lights coloring everything around them, her green eyes sparkle of trust and freedom right now. Long dark eyelashes that fan over the top of her cheeks when she blinks, cheeks which are turning a darker hue of pink now the longer he seems to look at her. Her tempting cleavage that he's barely dared to glance at, not wanting to be a creep, yet it's hard to miss now that it's rising and falling rapidly with her labored breaths that are matching his to a _T_.

She's a stunner, a fucking knockout, and he'd be lying if he said he isn't aroused, but it's not just her looks, it's so much more than that, more than just attraction, this thing, these emotions he has for her run so much deeper.

He's heard people - adults mostly - talk about life-changing moments, moments they'll always remember, the ones that bring smiles to their faces when they recall them, and this is definitely one of those, because his heart is soaring with feelings he never experienced before, with anyone. _How the fuck did I not know this sort of happiness existed?_

Even though Tara feels like she's slightly in shock, she still can't do anything about the dumb goofy smile on her face. It's involuntary, true and so fucking bright, shy, and yet somehow unabashed at the same time, and it doesn't go unnoticed that it matches his.

The moment their lips touched all of those feelings she's been trying so hard to ignore and suppress jumped to life and swirled, twisted, coursed around her body, igniting every last inch of her and causing a burn of desire like she's never felt before. She's falling for him, has been falling for him for a while, and for a moment in time she decides to forget about all the reasons why this is a bad idea and allows herself to live in the moment instead.

They both lean in at the exact same moment again, lips crushing against each other a bit more desperately now. Jax's hands can no longer remain idle but shoot out, first brushing her hair back again, framing her face, then end up tangled in her hair at the nape of her neck, to gently angle her just so to eventually deepen the kiss.

Wanting and needing more this time around, Jax slowly runs the tip of his tongue along her full bottom lip, asking for entrance and when Tara parts her lips just enough to signal her permission, he doesn't hesitate to push inside. Around and around he swirls, painstakingly slowly, tantalizing, delving inside until she begins to push back and begins to move with him as a trembling moan escapes her. The needy sound zings through his body and inadvertently connects with his groin, the muscles of his stomach pulling tight while his dick twitches with need.

He swears he's never heard anything better in all his life, nor has he felt anything better either. At least so he thought, until Tara too reaches out, wraps her arms around his torso, her hands fisting into the fabric of his t-shirt once more in a desperate attempt to pull all of him closer, while pulling herself closer to him at the same moment until she's almost in his lap, her thigh across his. _Jesus Christ!_

This is the kind of kiss she's only ever heard of, read about in novels, or watched on TV, but had never experienced herself yet, until now. It was the kind lit by want and need, pure desire and exploration. And dear God, did she want to explore ... _him!_

Her hands travel up his chest, slowly and exploratory, feeling his nipples pebble even through his shirt, she pauses on his shoulders for a second, but then completely stills when they're framing his face, holding him there with the same intensity as he's holding onto her, while their mouths and tongues continue to explore each other. She melts into him, gladly letting him do what he wants to her, and enjoying every minute of it.

They kiss like this for what feels like forever and at the same time not nearly long enough. Heat suffusing their skin, burning their cheeks, scorching their skin wherever their bodies touch.

An unexpected moment of guilt hits him, knowing that here in this backseat with him, she has nowhere to go, nowhere to hide, even if she wants to, but then he squashes that thought again when another little moan escapes her, sparking yet another flash of desire in him.

He can't help the groan that escapes him in reply, focusing all his attention on the way her tongue is moving demandingly against his, and it makes it clear that he's not in the wrong here, she wants this as much as he does. It's obvious in the way she so actively participates in this kiss to end all kisses.

In hindsight it almost seems inevitable that they'd end up here like this, not here in this backseat of a cop car, but here completely wrapped up in a desperate kiss, making each other's hearts race, finally giving in to the mutual attraction to each other. He's known it just had to happen sooner or later, but he wonders if she's known it too.

And just when Jax thinks he could stay here forever, feasting on her mouth, smelling her skin, breathing her air, the car door near Tara swings open, jostling the whole car a bit with the action and causing their lips to break away from each other at last.

"You've got to be kidding me!" The cop stares back at them in disbelief, shaking his head even though a little smirk quirks up the corners of his lips at the same time.

Jax's arms and hands instinctively reach around Tara's waist and pull her even closer to him, as if to signal his claim on her, or simply to ensure this dickhead of a cop knows he won't be able to pry her away from him, at least not without a fight. That kiss seems to have transported him to a world where common sense doesn't seem to matter anymore. A world where an unarmed teenager stands a chance against four armed cops.

Tara shyly hides her blushing cheeks in the crook of Jax's neck, her arms wrapped around him too, while her head is suddenly spinning with the way she feels having Jax pull her against him so possessive and protectively. It does all kinds of things to her, things she'd rather not experience under the scrutinizing gaze of a cop she's too embarrassed to even look at at the moment. And her heart ... God, her heart is beating so dangerously fast, she fears it might explode.

"C'mon, you two." Deputy Baker takes a step back, holding the door open as an obvious invitation for them to exit the car now, before he adds with a little chuckle to his voice. "Get the hell out of there before someone ends up pregnant."

At that Tara begins to push away, Jax's arms loosening their hold on her, so she slowly scoots off of his lap and across the seat to get out, her head hanging low but her eyes meet his when she looks back at him for just a second, cheeks flaming at both the memory of what has just transpired between them and the comment from deputy Baker.

Jax stays close behind her, climbs out right after her, sidles up beside her, wrapping his arm around her waist once more, tugging her close again, and meeting her surprised eyes when she finally looks up at him. And if a look alone could say something out loud, then the look he's giving her would tell her he's got no regrets whatsoever, and hell will freeze over before he'll allow her to have them either. _We did this, Knowles. This happened, and there is no turning back now._

"Mister Oswald isn't pressing any charges, which means you two are free to go." The deputy explains interrupting their wordless conversation.

"Mister Teller." He says and hands Jax his driver's license back, then turns his attention to Tara beside him, holding out her driver's permit for her to take. "Misses Knowles." Then his eyes travel back and forth between the two teenagers, when he adds. "I hope this will be the last I'll see the two of you."

"Me too," Tara replies with a shy smile, relief washing over her as she's tugging the permit into the back pocket of her jean shorts.

Then Jax pulls her along with him back towards the truck, eager to leave now, and she trots along as if on autopilot, still reveling in the relief that her father won't find out about her near-arrest, and too flustered still about her kiss with Jax to form any other coherent thoughts.

Just as Jax pulls the door open for her to climb on inside, both their attention is diverted back to the deputy behind them when he blurts out. "Oh, and by the way, happy birthday."

Jax's eyebrows scrunch together in puzzlement, before he looks down at Tara beside him, who's gracing the deputy with the smallest little smile when she simply replies. "Thanks."

"It's your birthday?" Jax can't keep the surprise out of his voice anymore than he can keep the question from slipping past his lips. When Tara sinks her teeth into her plump bottom lip and nods the answer uncertainly back up at him, he's momentarily speechless. But that only lasts for a split second, before he blurts the next question out all the while gripping her elbow to help her climb into the cab of the truck. "Why didn't you say something?"

Tara scoots over towards her seat and watches him as he gets in right after her.

Jax settles into his seat, then blindly reaches for and turns the key in the ignition with his eyes still locked on hers, waiting for her to answer him.

She clears her throat, feeling suddenly shy again when she says. "How do you tell someone that it's your birthday without it sounding like you're fishing for a present or something?"

Okay, she's got a valid point there, but still, he can't believe he didn't know. He shakes his head to himself, looking in the rearview mirror, then twists his neck to look over his shoulder to ensure the coast is clear behind them, the task at hand momentarily requiring his full attention. The still flashing lights of the cop cars help him see the path of the gravel road he's slowly backing out on, all the way past the fence and still wide open gate with the now infamous 'No trespassing' sign.

"I get that." He says at last as he begins to do a three-way turn, before he starts driving down the dirt road back towards the major highway that'll lead them into Charming. "I just ... I feel bad I didn't get you anything." He admits truthfully, at last, looking over at her and giving her the sweetest of smiles.

"You paid for my food, took me to the movies." Tara points out everything he's paid for last night.

Which only prompts Jax to further clarify. "Wait ... was your birthday yesterday, or today?" He repeatedly looks over at her, waiting for her reply while still trying to pay attention to the road ahead.

"Today, now. June 21st is my birthday." Tara answers, then adds. "But you don't have to get me anything. Really."

"I _am_ gonna get you something." He says sounding earnest, but then even chuckles a little under his breath when he adds a moment later. "I might not have a fucking clue what to get you, but you are getting something, babe. I promise. Alright?" What kind of boyfriend would he be if he didn't get his girl something? _Jesus, boyfriend? Where did that come from? ... jumping the gun here, Teller._

"Yeah, okay." Tara nods in reply, not sure what else to say. He smiles at her some more and she can't help but return the smile, shaking her head to herself now at the way this date with him has progressed over the last couple of hours. She couldn't have imagined this even if she'd tried.

Silence fills the air as the wind blows through the cabin of the truck on the drive back home. Jax pulls his pack of cigarettes from his pocket, raising the last remaining one to his lips, and quickly lights it. The nicotine successfully suppresses the urge to pull her curvy little body back into his lap while he's driving 65 miles an hour down a highway.

But then, he's suddenly holding the cigarette out to her, like he's done a few times before, and adds with a smirk. "Just to be clear, that's not your birthday present."

His smirk and little joke makes the butterflies in her stomach raising hell again. She stares at the cigarette, remembering how she's turned him down each time in the past, but right now she can't help but wonder if the nicotine would help her calm her nerves as it seems to do to everyone else who's succumbed to this bad habit. And on top of that, she suddenly has the unexplainable urge to ... I don't know ... impress him, ... or at least appear that she's cool with what has happened between him and her back there in that cop car. _Yeah, no biggie, Teller! It's all cool!_

And so, much to Jax's obvious surprise she takes the cigarette from his outstretched hand this time, their fingers brushing against each other sending new sparks through her, before she raises the glimmering stick up to her lips under Jax's curious gaze.

She's smoked enough weed that the smoke filling her lungs doesn't cause her to cough like most newbies might've, and she can see the anew surprise in Jax's eyes at that as well, which doesn't really make sense since they've shared a joint earlier tonight too.

The corners of his lips are curved up into yet another smirk when his gaze keeps flicking back and forth between the road and her. The cigarette wedged between her plump pink lips stirring up all kinds of dirty thoughts in the back of his mind now.

Tara sees the way he's been watching her, holding out the cigarette back to him which he quickly takes to calm his own nerves, but she can't help but blurt out, smiling a little. "What? Why are you looking at me like that?"

Jax gives her a shrug of his shoulder as he takes a few quick drags, then holds the cigarette back out to her again, releasing the smoke out of the side of his mouth, away from her, a moment later. Meeting her eyes again, before they drift down to her lips pulling seductively on the cigarette and he finally mumbles a thought he has out loud. "You have a really sexy mouth, you know that?"

Tara averts her eyes at that, heat spreading through her core, cheeks blushing all over again, and she's not sure what to say to that, how to react to that. "Do I?" She asks back a moment later, shyly, but it's the best she can come up with as a reply, batting her eyelashes at him even though she truly doesn't mean to, they seem to do it on their own accord. His compliments are turning her into one of _those_ girls, and she's not sure she likes that, but then suddenly wonders if they too - _those girls_ \- simply can't help themselves around him and she's pegged them all wrong all this time.

"Yeah, you do." He nods, waving away the offered smoke, allowing her to finish what little's left of it, and enjoying every second of watching her doing so. "Very kissable too." He adds and loves the way it makes her blush even deeper.

Tara remains silent to that, flustered finishes the cigarette, extinguishing the last glimmer in the overfilled ashtray of the truck.

They pass the 'Welcome to Charming' sign and Jax slows down to the appropriate speed. "Where to now?" He asks, breaking the tension that has begun to fill the air between them again, it's not uncomfortable, but heavy with uncertainty somehow.

Tara looks back at him a little surprised that he'd ask, but then glances ruefully at the clock on the dash, noting the late hour and remembering that her dad wants her to wake up early to practice driving before she's taking her test in the afternoon. She doesn't want the night with him to end, but then again she knows it has to at some point. _And maybe it's for the better that it does._ That nagging voice rears its ugly head again for the first time in several hours, but she squashes it down again, not ready to allow her mind to go back to that place of doubt just yet.

"Home, I guess." She answers him at last, seeing the disappointment that crosses over his face, probably matching her own. "I've gotta get up early to practice driving with my dad, 'cause I'm taking my driver's license test tomorrow, ... I mean, today." She adds in explanation, hoping that'll soothe some of the sting, and it does seem to when Jax meets her eyes, nodding at her in understanding now.

He pulls to a stop alongside the curb in front of her house, like she'd asked, then cuts the engine. They sit quietly for a long moment, a little warily looking at each other again, before Jax can't take it anymore, turning towards her, reaches for her, brushing her hair back behind her ear and says. "C'mere, babe."

His eyes are imploring her, pleading with her to comply, in a way he's testing the waters to see if she's yet again talked herself out of this, - out of them -, in the short drive home since they've shared those kisses.

"Why don't _you_ come over here, _babe_?" Tara overly enunciates the term of endearment he's begun to use in regards to her in her reply, a tone of unexpected confidence to her voice that sounds almost like her old self yet at the moment is completely faked, but she's still proud with herself for pulling it off quite convincingly, at least judging by the look on his face. _I bet those girls don't do that!_

Jax smirks, shaking his head, he can't help it. Most girls usually jump at the chance to sidle up next to him when he asks them to, but leave it to Tara Knowles to turn it into some kind of a challenge.

But right now he's too far gone to even care who has the upper hand in this and starts to move closer towards her with a one-track mind, and reaches for her arm to pull her closer towards him at the same time, mumbling. "How about we meet in the middle?"

But before Tara can even think of what to say or do, he's already cupping her cheeks in both his hands and is pressing his lips to hers in yet another scorching and toe-curling kiss, which she quickly begins to reciprocate, letting her own hands snake around his neck to hold him close now too.

Lips and tongues moving in perfect harmony, tasting each other in deep, even strokes. There's nothing hurried or forceful about this kiss, but it's all-consuming, so damn dreamy, she could lose herself in it, never wanting it to stop. _Screw sleep, who needs it?_

Finally, the voice of reason returns to her, and Tara pulls back, breaking the contact of their lips, and momentarily hides her blushing cheeks behind her hands in embarrassment.

When she dares to meet his eyes again, he's looking down at her with an expression that's truly melting her insides. _Shit, I'm in so much trouble!_

She clears her throat, gesturing with her hand towards her home when she manages to finally speak. "I should go. Thank you for tonight, Jax." She reaches for the door handle to open it.

"Wait. Let me get that." Jax interjects, then gets out of the truck at lightning speed, coming around to her side to open the door for her, and even holding out his hand to help her get out. _Very chivalrously!_

"Thanks," Tara replies shyly as they walk up the driveway alongside each other, his hand resting in the small of her back sending tingles up and down her spine along the way. It's utterly baffling to her what kind of effect the smallest of touch from him seems to have on her. It's never been like that with anyone else, not with Logan and certainly not with any other boys she's gone out with in the past. _Is this what it's like when you're really falling in love?_

They step onto the small cement porch, Tara's already pulled her keys out of the little purse she'd brought along, and is quickly, but quietly unlocking the front door. She pushes the door open a little, then turns back towards him, standing on unsure feet in the doorway, peering up at him through those long dark lashes of hers.

For a moment, she hesitates, biting her lip again, not sure what to say to him or do now that the date has come to an end. She's totally off her game here with him, out of her element, because it's never been this complicated and she's never felt this conflicted with any other boy. The possibility of Jax and her really becoming a couple makes her heart soar, but it still scares her to death too.

But then he looks down at her as if he wants to kiss her again, doesn't waste another second, surges forward, and bridges the gap between them, ducking down to do just that when he presses yet another kiss against her still slightly swollen lips.

His tongue slides along the seam of her lips for just the second until she opens up to him and deepens the kiss with him. And for the first time, while kissing, he's letting his hands slip down to her waist before wrapping his arms around her, pulling all of her into him, and everything about this feels so incredibly good and right, that Tara swears her toes are actually curling this time.

"Good luck on your test, Knowles. I'm sure you'll ace it." He says when he pulls away, his eyes holding her gaze, his hands on her waist now, still holding her close. Then he's looking uncharacteristically shy for just a second, before he adds. "That cop beat me to the punch, but _happy birthday, babe!_ " He wraps his arms around her once more, completely engulfing her with his whole body, pressing a sweet kiss against the top of her head.

She's wrapped her arms around his torso too, clinging to him and wanting to revel in the feeling of this night for just a little bit longer. Holding him, breathing him in, and feeling his heartbeat against her cheek. _I'm so screwed!_

"You need to go in." Jax loosens his hold on her, urging her to do the same. "Because I can't leave until you do." He adds, his hands playing with her hair again, brushing it back out of her face repeatedly just to keep from touching her elsewhere.

"Okay." Tara agrees because he's right, but then she's at a loss for words again, not sure what to say, how to properly end this. The most generic answer comes to mind. "I had a good time." It's an understatement, but it's all she's got. Smiling that shy smile again, and takes a reluctant step back, pushing the door further open when she steps inside.

"Me too." He answers smiling back at her. "Sweet dreams." He winks at her next and she shakes her head at him, can't help but chuckle at his suggestive tone when she wishes him the same. "You too."

"Good night." He smirks.

"Good night." She smiles.

Somehow, someway she brings herself to actually close the door, their eyes connected until the very last second. And then she sinks to the ground, sliding down with her back braced against the hard wooden surface, smiling like a fool, but at the same time trying hard not to giggle out loud at the pure happiness that is surging through her, just in case he's still standing on the other side listening in.

But then it suddenly hits her, all the reasons why this shouldn't have happened. _Oh God, what have I done?_

X

Her day hasn't turned out quite like she'd hoped.

She's barely gotten any sleep after Jax had left. She'd drift off just to wake again not long after, and spending every waking second recalling and overanalyzing every word, every touch, and every kiss she's shared with him, until eventually her alarm went off, signaling it was already time to get up again.

Then her last driving lessons with her father didn't go much better either, so much so that in her sleep-deprived and distracted mind she'd almost run a red light. He took her back home after that, where she ended up falling asleep within minutes in utter exhaustion, taking a nearly 2-hour long nap. But then, later on, by the grace of God, she manages to pass her driver's test after all, much to her own and her fathers' disbelief.

They went out for a late lunch at some fancy restaurant in downtown Stockton, in celebration of her newly acquired license and of course her birthday too, with a heaping helping of cake as dessert. Her father handed the spare keys to the Cutlass to her as they were waiting for the check, telling her that she could - officially - have free use of his car now until he found her a suitable one of her own.

Her dad was truly _the best_ and Tara was obviously ecstatic, but despite her best efforts to not think about him, this thing with Jax still overshadowed even this sweet moment with her dad for her, and she hated herself for it. She knew then that she needed to hash it all out with someone, bending a friend's ear in hopes to figure a way out of this mess she's made.

So now, that's where she was, sitting on her bed with a pile of freshly laundered clothes piled high right beside her that she's busy folding and putting on hangers, while she recalls not just last night's events, but everything that has happened between them, to a disbelieving Rayna sitting in the old rocking chair, the last remnant from when she was a baby and this room had been a nursery.

"What the hell is wrong with me?" Tara groans in disbelief after she's finished giving her friend a very detailed account of all things concerning Jax.

"Nothing's wrong with you," Rayna interjects.

But before she can say anything else, Tara continues. "Every time I'm around him I get these feelings I don't wanna be feeling, and I just ... I don't trust myself. It's like I lose all common sense when I'm with him."

"That's called 'undeniable chemistry'. I think it's time to get real about what you really want." Rayna says then adds with a chuckle. "'Cause from what you just told me it sure sounds like Teller knows what he wants."

Tara groans again, for the millionth time wondering how things got so out of hand last night. "How could I be so stupid? How did I let things go that far?"

"You know what I think?" Rayna asks but doesn't give her the chance to reply before she already carries on, supplying the answer. "I think opportunity knocked at your door in the form of a blond-haired, blue-eyed hunk of bad-boy hotness, and ... well, you kissed him on the mouth. Repeatedly. With tongue." She lets out a little laugh, much to Tara's displeasure.

"That's so not funny. And not helpful _at all!_ " Tara replies dryly, shaking her head and busies her hands by concentrating on folding a pair of pajamas with much more detail than necessary.

Rayna gets up from her seat now, takes the few steps over to Tara's desk where something had caught her eye when she first got here, a list. She's seen Tara make these kinds of lists before, as a matter of fact, she's seen her do it very recently, about Jax, and so she can't help but raise the piece of paper up for Tara to see when she says. "You're still making lists though? Pros and cons?"

Tara's not even embarrassed, making lists is her thing. It's a way to put all this craziness into perspective. "Because I'm trying to be smart about this thing with Jax."

"O-kay." Rayna draws out the word, letting her eyes travel over the list, smirking at the aspects of Jax that Tara seems to deem a pro or a con. The list of cons is a lot longer, albeit most of them utterly ridiculous in Rayna's opinion since they pertain more to Emma instead of the man of the hour himself. "And what did the list tell you?

Tara gestures to the paper in Rayna's hand. "Obviously we're a very bad idea."

"On paper." Rayna agrees, putting the list back down, and turning her full attention back towards her friend. "But seriously, T, what does your gut say?"

"Have you not been listening?" Tara wonders out loud before she adds. "My gut agrees. It's a bad idea."

"Right, that's why you keep on making the lists?" Rayna snatches the paper up again and waves it in the air to further support the point she's trying to make right now.

But Tara doesn't get it, looking up at her confused. "What do you mean?"

Rayna shakes her head in disbelief, before she explains. "What I mean is that you're obviously hoping that the pros are gonna outnumber the cons one day, or you wouldn't keep making the list over and over again." She says glancing around her desk, and quickly rifling through her things finding some of the previous lists Tara had made, before she adds. "I mean how many do you have here? ... Five? Six?"

Tara's not sure how to respond because there's certainly some truth to what Rayna is saying.

Rayna takes her silence as a sign to carry on, and recalling the cons of the list she's just looked at it's clear to her that Emma and bitches just like her have done quite a number on Tara and someone needs to screw her head on straight again, preferably before she blows her chance with the boy that she so obviously likes. "So it's either staying loyal to that backstabbing bitch Emma, or seeing where this thing with hottie Jackson Teller might actually lead? That's _the Sophie's choice_ you're agonizing over? Really?" Rayna scoffs at her for just a second before she continues to ramble on. "Why do you worry so much what other people will think? What are you really afraid of, Tara? I mean, are you afraid if you ever do something even remotely selfish the earth's gravitational pull will end and we'll all go flying into space? I ... I just really don't get what's holding you back."

Tara sighs dramatically, leaning back against the pillows behind her, before she questions out loud. "Aren't you supposed to be on my side here? Telling me how to get out of this mess I made?"

"I am totally on your side. But what do you want me to say? I'm really sorry you kissed a really hot guy last night? So sorry he's really fucking into you and you're into him too? So sorry you'll have to put aside your plans for spinsterdom?" Rayna chuckles at the last one now, no longer able to keep a straight face at her own little joke.

Tara smiles too. "Spinsterdom? Really?"

"Hey, I'm just calling it like I see it," Rayna replies, grinning as she tries on a pair of Tara's sunglasses and glances in the vanity mirror to see how they suit her.

But the moment of laughter and lightheartedness is short-lived and Tara closes her eyes, draping her arm across her face to hide the fact that she's near tears now, because she's feeling so torn inside. This thing with Jax has turned her into an emotional mess.

"Look, you want me to be like Emma? Give you the kind of advice that will be in _my_ best interest instead of yours? Or you want me to be a real friend, who tells you the cold hard truth and gives it to you straight?" Rayna surprises her with that statement a moment later as she's taking a seat on the foot of the bed right across from her, not liking to see her this distraught over something that should be simple.

Tara wipes at the moisture in her eyes, sniffling, before she slowly pushes herself up into a sitting position against the headboard again. She grabs one of her pillows, hugging it and clutching it to her chest, feeling vulnerable and exposed with the way Rayna's able to get under her skin. She lets out another dramatic sigh, but then replies with a huff of annoyance to her voice. "I obviously want the truth."

"Good. I was hoping you'd say that." Rayna nods pleased, then begins to speak, letting everything she's been holding back out now. "So here are the truths." She holds up her hand and counts along with each truth she's sharing. "One. What Emma wants or doesn't want you to do, doesn't matter. She's no longer your friend, hasn't been a good friend for a long time, and because of that, her feelings and opinions don't matter. She has no say in any of this. Two. What those girls in the bathroom said doesn't matter either. The rumors about you are bullshit, so you have to give him the same benefit of the doubt and assume that the rumors about him are bullshit too. Which also makes that whole _you just being his flavor of the week thing_ bullshit too. The Jax those girls talked about, consider him gone, he doesn't exist, never really did. And he got replaced with a guy that's very obviously into you. Three. Who gives a shit what anyone else thinks or will think? Look, I get that those rumors upset you and I was upset for you too when I heard about them, but even if you were the _sluttiest slut in all of Sluttown_ , that's your business and your business alone. I mean, if I would freak out every time my name gets tossed around in this town I'd never get anything done."

"That's because what they say about you is mostly true." Tara interrupts truthfully, smirking a little because she knows Rayna is in fact very confident and utterly unapologetic about her flirtatious antics. She has been known to make grown men blush.

Rayna shrugs, chuckling while she's smirking too. "That's true, but still. The point is, you should never let anyone tell you how to live your life, or let them dictate what's right or wrong. What I mean is, if screwing Jackson Teller's brains out is what you wanna do, then you shouldn't let anyone make you feel bad about it. If the _biker boy'_ s your kink, then you need to own that shit."

If there's one thing Tara should've expected by now, it's that Rayna does not hold any punches, but it still makes her cover her face in embarrassment, because it's true that she is very attracted to Jax, whether she wants to admit it to the world or not. Leave it to Rayna to point that out to her so very bluntly.

Rayna doesn't miss a beat though and carries on, undeterred by Tara's embarrassment. "Four. I know that someone breaking in here and trying to hurt you has been seriously messing with your head, and has you feeling all kinds of fucked up. Believe me, I totally _\- totally -_ get that. But that is so not a reason to not get it on with Jax. I mean, _Jesus Christ_ , Tara, he single-handedly saved your life. He swashbuckled that shit, he's like ... like your very own _knight in shining leather_! Which brings us to truth number five. You worry that if it hadn't been for the break-in, you and Jax wouldn't even be talking to each other, let alone going out on dates. And yeah, maybe that one is true, but that doesn't mean that this thing with you two isn't real."

At that Tara can't bite her tongue any longer and interrupts her when she blurts out. "But it doesn't mean that it's good either."

Rayna's slowly growing more frustrated with Tara though. "You realize you're just nitpicking at every fucking little thing, right? Like you want to find more and more reasons to not get serious with him. For what? To keep dodging what could become something really amazing? Think about it. You had this crazy, adventurous night with him, but here you are, on your birthday, moping and crying as if he'd been a total jerk to you last night, when he was the complete opposite of that. Why are you still stuck here? Why do you keep looking for reasons to not give him a real chance?"

"It's complicated. You know that." Tara defends herself.

"No, I think it's convenient that it's complicated." Rayna corrects her. "Or you trying to make it sound like it's complicated when in reality it isn't that at all."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Tara stares back at her confused, not at all understanding where Rayna is going with this now.

"You know we've been friends since kindergarten too, I know you pretty well, just like you know me pretty well too, and I know how you've been with all the other guys you've dated before."

"How I've been? What are you talking about?" Tara wonders out loud.

"I'm saying you've got a type, Tara. Let's be real here, it's obvious that you've got a thing for bad-boys. And sure, you flirt and maybe even go out on a date with them ... _once_ , but then you use the very fact that they are 'bad-boys' as an excuse to not get serious." Rayna explains.

"That's so not true, Logan and I were together for a long time." She defends herself.

"Right." Rayna nods. "A long time that led absolutely nowhere, because most of the time he did his own thing with his asshole jock friends and the wannabe Queen Bees of the cheerleading squad, while you hung out with Emma, or me, or the rest of our friends. So I guess, yeah, technically it's true that you didn't dump Logan after date number one, but you still never really got serious with him either. And I'm guessing with Jax's whole family being who they are, that whole biker outlaw thing, and girls swooning over him, in a way, he's the ultimate bad-boy, right? Which makes him not a real option for you, at least not in that twisted little head of yours."

"I don't know." Tara huffs out on a long sigh, feeling like she's out of breath, not really sure what else to say to all that. Her head is swimming with everything Rayna's throwing at her all at once, but she's trying to listen, tries to take it all to heart, and see how she sees it.

Tara doesn't want to admit it, but this isn't the first time someone has pointed her flawed thinking out to her in regards to boys and her dating life. The truth is she had in fact wanted to dump Logan very early on, but Emma had been the one that talked her into giving him a chance, much like Rayna is doing now in regards to Jax. The only difference is that she never even remotely felt for Logan the way she was feeling about him. Her feelings for Jax were honestly something she's never ever felt before in her life, for anyone.

After a moment Tara finally replies. "Maybe you're right, okay? Maybe I have some serious issues, and I don't know how to be close to somebody. Maybe it isn't just about Emma or the rumors, maybe it's about me." She pauses, trying to swallow away the lump that she can feel forming in her throat, because the truth is that this boy has the means to break her heart in a way it's never been broken before and she knows it, and that thought scares her. "But Jax isn't like those other guys, Ray. The way I feel about him is so different, and I'm ... I'm just terrified."

"Terrified of what?" Rayna asks somberly and genuinely concerned at the expression that has crossed over Tara's face now.

Tara struggles with the right words, but she finally admits to Rayna what she didn't even want to admit to herself. "I'm terrified, because ... I think I'm falling in love with him." A single tear is running down her cheek that she quickly wipes away. "Or maybe I already am in love with him. But ... but what if my worst fears are true? What if he's just playing me? What if he doesn't feel the same?" Her eyes fill with more tears, her chin trembling at the ugly truth that to Rayna's surprise honestly doesn't have much to do with Emma after all. But unbeknownst to Rayna it still does have to do with Emma, because Tara's inner thoughts are very much influenced by Emma's ugly words on the night of the party at Lodi Lake.

"Shit." Rayna blurts out when Tara falls apart right in front of her. She hurries to close the distance between them and pulls her friend into her arms to comfort her. "Come here."

The two girls embrace for a long silent moment, Tara's body shaking with sobs she's trying so hard to suppress and control, but she's failing miserably.

After a while Tara eventually pulls away and Rayna hands her the tissue box from the other nightstand, waiting until she's wiped the wetness from her face before speaking up again. "But what if you're wrong?"

"What?" Tara asks looking befuddled, sniffling into the tissue in her hand.

"At the risk of sounding like a total chick here, but what if Jax is the guy you're supposed to end up with? But you don't because you're too damn scared to give it a go. I mean, for fuck's sake, I already said it once but it's worth mentioning again: He saved your life! And then, ... then he sat on your couch and read a goddamn book to you?" Rayna blurts out, sounding still in disbelief that that has actually happened. "I mean, who does that?"

At that both of them can't help but giggle a little, until Rayna carries on even more. "You're already sitting here crying, so could the worst-case scenario of him breaking your heart really be any worse than you breaking it all on your own? What if for once in your life you stop worrying, stop making excuses and just go for it, go for what you really want? I mean, do you really wanna close the damn book and make this the end of the story? Or do you wanna turn the page and see what'll happen next? What do you want, T?"

Tara raises her hand up to cover her trembling lips and chin, suddenly overcome with emotions again at the thought of really closing the book on Jax. Rayna's words are resonating with her, because she really doesn't want that.

But at the same time Rayna still has both her parents, she hasn't seen the kind of heartbreak you subject yourself to when you let someone in like that. Tara will never forget how it broke her dad's heart when her mom died. One day she was here and they were happy, and the next she was just gone, ripped out of their lives way too soon. That shit isn't easy to cope with. It makes it hard to believe in a happily-ever-after. It makes it hard to believe that people can fall in love and stay together. At least for Tara, it does, because that's what she's experienced firsthand. That's what she knows.

But maybe, just maybe, Rayna's right. Maybe she just needs to take that leap of faith, and believe that there's a reason Jax was there that night to save her, and has been there ever since to help her through the aftermath too.

 _Her knight in shining leather!_ That's what Rayna's called him, the thought brings a little smile to Tara's face when an image of Jax in his usual attire appears in her head: Blue jeans, t-shirt, and a leather Jacket.

She shakes her head to herself, because she can't believe what she's about to do, but then, at last, she finally speaks up, her voice is soft, yet surprisingly there's no doubt in it when she answers Rayna's last question and finally admits out loud what she's known in her heart for a while now. "I want him. I want Jax."

"Finally. Took you long enough." Rayna smiles, big and bright and genuinely. "Looks like my job here is done." She nudges Tara in the shoulder, urging her to make some room for her so she can sit beside her, then turns her attention to her before she says. "Okay, now that that's settled, tell me more about that book he read to you? He didn't happen to read like a sex scene or something, did he?"

Tara can't help but let out a laugh at that, despite her still red-rimmed eyes from the tears that haven't completely dried just yet. She shakes her head though when she answers. "No, no sex scenes, it was just sick and twisted and scary stuff. Nothing remotely sexy about it."

"Hmmm." Rayna muses, then quickly adds with a hint of a smirk on her face. "Look, I swear I do not have a thing for Teller, so don't take this the wrong way. But I have heard Jax read shit out loud in class before, and he could recite the side effects of my birth control pills, or a freaking grocery list or something, and most girls would probably need to change their panties right after."

"Oh my God, Rayna." Tara blurts out in shock at Rayna's crude remark, playfully slapping her friend in the shoulder as they both start laughing out loud.

Through the laughter, Rayna adds. "Tell me I'm wrong. You know I'm not lying." She searches Tara's face for a moment, still smiling brightly, and still chuckling a little under her breath when she asks. "C'mon, it must've done something to you when he was reading to you?"

"I'm not gonna answer that," Tara replies, smiling too, and still chuckling too as she's shaking her head no.

"I'm gonna take that as a big fat yes." Rayna teases her, laughing all over again. "Admit it, Knowles, you totally got hot and bothered by him reading, didn't you?"

"I'm pleading the fifth," Tara replies, blushing, smiling, and laughing.

At that Rayna gasps, and playfully pushes Tara away from her, teasing her. "I knew it, you totally did, you slutty slut."

Another bout of laughter echoes through Tara's bedroom when both of them can't seem to stop, a welcoming change to the tears that were flowing earlier.

But slowly their laughter turns to little giggles as they're trying to catch their breaths, before even the giggles die down completely.

A moment of silence fills the air between the two friends until Rayna breaks it, meeting Tara's eyes with a questioning look when she points out. "There's a party in Lodi tonight, at this seniors' place, he's friends with Tino."

"My dad won't let me go," Tara interjects instantly.

"Really? Not even on your birthday?" Rayna wonders out loud, searching Tara's face to see if that's really true. "He can't still be mad, I mean, he didn't even ground you."

Tara sighs in frustration. "The reason he didn't ground me about what happened at the last party was only because my birthday was coming up. But trust me on this, he's still mad about that and there is no way in hell he'll let me go, _especially_ on my birthday."

"Okay. Let me think." Rayna nods, the wheels in her head turning with ideas on how they could make this work. "We'll just tell your dad that you're sleeping at my house tonight. And I'll tell my parents that I'll be sleeping over here. We don't have to mention a party to either one of them. Problem solved. Tada." She adds with a fake-sounding cheer.

"Um, okay, ... but where are we actually going to sleep?" Tara raises her eyebrows in both skepticism and curiosity.

"We're not, T, that's the whole point. I'll ask Tino for the address and we're gonna make sure your loverboy will be there, so you can tell him how you feel, and then we're gonna _party hardy_."

"You're serious?" Tara asks again, her eyebrows rising almost to her hairline.

"Hell yes, I'm serious. Good girls finish last, baby. We can sleep when we're dead." Rayna replies and drapes her arm around Tara's shoulder. "Trust me, this will be your best birthday yet."

X

Author's Note: Lots of progress for Tara in this chapter, I hope you like it. Please leave me a comment or a review, I really want to hear what you think. Thanks.

P.S. Parts of this chapter were inspired by Keith Urban's song 'Cop Car'.


	16. You and me, are we doing this, babe?

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

Jax is casually leaning onto the glass display case, which also serves as a counter that stretches across the entire length of the smallish Rio Vista pawnshop, carefully observing the female clerk while she's busy looking over his box full of video games and movies for the second time. She's been nothing but sweet and apologetic when she's tried to explain to him that they already have too many copies of most of what he's brought in, but Jax is trying anything he can think of to make it that much harder for her to turn him down.

"Really, darlin'?" He practically drawls while he's leaning in closer to her, reaching out with his hand, tugging lightly before playfully twisting a blond strand of her long hair around his fingers, and looking her over with such intensity that it makes the girl blush all over. She's probably thinking that he's checking out her rack in the tiny tank top she's wearing, which he is, a little, but unbeknownst to her, he's actually more interested in the name on her nametag, because he's trying to make this conversation that much more personal. "You really can't make an exception for me, Cindy? C'mon, I'd be forever in your debt." He's smirking back at her, his eyes sparkling with suggestive mischief that causes her to blush yet again.

But for Jax it's all just an act, knowing his charm usually works like ... well, like a charm, so he's laying it on thick. Between paying for the last parts he's ordered to finally fix up his bike, which are coming in tomorrow, last night's date with Tara he insisted on paying for, the birthday gift he has practically already picked out for her, and him not getting paid until Friday, he's found himself a little short on spending money, so he's determined to not take no for an answer from the girl standing across from him.

Jax and Cindy continue talking and flirting back and forth for a few more minutes, the infamous _Teller charm_ hard at work at the moment. So much so that Opie can't help but turn away from the scene, because he can no longer keep the _'are you shitting me_ ' expression from his face, when he hears the girl agree, at last. She's downright giggling as Jax continues to flirt with her while she's busy counting out the cash for him before handing it over.

A few moments later the two boys find themselves back in Piney's truck, Opie's already pulling the vehicle onto the road to head back to Charming, when he gestures to the back of Jax's hand, at the scribble in permanent marker that reads ' _Cindy 555 0936'_. "Good luck getting that off before the party later."

Jax glances down at his hand for just a second, rubbing his thumb across the name and phone number, smirking to himself before he lights the cigarette that's already wedged between his lips, and then says after his first drag. "Shop cleaner will take that right off. Wouldn't be the first time." But then he throws Opie another look, smirking again when he's raising his hand to show the number off. "Unless you're interested and wanna jot it down first."

"No thanks." Opie scoffs back at him, because he sure as shit doesn't need Jax to get a girl's phone number for him, but he then shakes his head in amusement a second later. "Look at you getting all cocky though, ... you realize that just because you actually managed to lock lips with Tara last night, it doesn't mean you and her are a done deal, bro. I mean, shit, I lost count how many times I've heard you tell some chick that _'a kiss is just a kiss'_ when they were hoping it meant more." Opie raises his eyebrows pointedly at Jax when his friend looks over to meet his eyes, before he points his thumb over his shoulder in the direction of the pawnshop they'd just left and adds. "I'm just saying Tara ain't easy like _blondie_ you just conned forty bucks out of."

"Don't I know it," Jax replies on a sigh, remembering how reluctant Tara's been to give him a shot in the first place. But then he's smirking again, his thoughts drifting back to his date last night with Tara once again, because as tumultuous as it had been, especially the very rocky start, it was so totally worth it. Those kisses he'd shared with her had certainly soothed his bruised ego after the countless rejection she'd handed out the week prior.

"So where to next, Romeo." Opie teases, and is instantly rewarded with a middle finger from Jax.

Jax replies without missing a beat though. "Back to Charming. That jewelry place on main street. I already picked it out."

X

 _Later that night_

The party in Lodi is just getting started by the time Tara arrives with a group of her friends in tow. They make their way through the house, with her searching for Jax, wishing and hoping he got the message she'd left earlier with Opie, letting him know that she'd be here tonight.

The further she ventures inside, the louder the bass seems to get, the rhythmic thump of it temporarily drowning out her erratic heartbeat at the thought of reuniting with him after everything that had happened last night.

She keeps getting stopped along the way by people she knows, greeting her and a few that know it's her birthday are even congratulating her. And she still tries to be polite, tries to look interested and happy about the attention, but the truth of the matter is that she's finally realized who her real friends are, who she matters to and who should matter to her, and sadly the majority of these people simply don't belong into that category any longer.

She's caught off guard when a hand reaches out and encircles her wrist, pulling her to a sudden stop and off to the side. Within seconds Logan's hands are on her waist, a once familiar gesture that now seems odd and out of place, and then he leans in, to shout-whisper in her ear with a smile. "Happy birthday, Tar."

Tara takes a step back, but the hallway is so damn crowded at the moment with more people arriving, that there isn't much room for her to do that, so she simply braces her hand against his chest to create a bit of distance between them, while she tries to smile back at him in reply. "Thanks."

They remain like that, standing awkwardly off to the side, with his friends and her friends looking on, while neither of them seems to know what else to say for a long moment.

Tara's just about to excuse herself, the words already on the tip of her tongue, ready to move on, when Logan finally speaks up, his lips near her ear again so she can actually hear him over the hip hop beats that are so loud it feels like the walls are shaking. "Can we go somewhere? To talk?"

Tara looks up then, meeting his eyes, trying to gauge what kind of mood he's in. She kind of wants to say no here and now, because she really has nothing left to say to him. Nor does she need a lecture from him about whatever bullshit Emma's told him about Jax and her, but when he smiles sweetly and mouths the word 'please' to her, she relents at last. After all, he might've been annoying last night, but at the end, he did back off when Jax had asked him to, so maybe she should just get this over with and clear the air between them once and for all, before Jax shows up and they end up having another awkward run-in again.

"Yeah, okay." She says back, but he can barely hear her, he has managed to read her lips though, and so he nods in the direction of the patio doors that lead out back, a wordless question if she's cool with that.

Maybe she's being stupid, but right now she just wants to get this over with, so she just nods her head in reply, before she turns back around towards her friends a moment later, gesturing with her hands and mouthing words of explanation as to where she's going with Logan, and why.

X

Jax and Opie have fought their way into the house, greeting friends left and right, while the music blares obnoxiously loud throughout the various speakers.

Jax continues to look around, trying to find Tara or maybe even her friends anywhere, but so far he's had no luck.

Opie is scanning the crowd as well, still searching for the cute brunette he had met at the Lake that night, but just like Jax, he can't find the girl he's looking for either.

But just as they step out of the hallway and into one of the main rooms, Opie catches a glimpse of Tara making her way towards the patio door with Logan right beside her, and he quickly nudges Jax with his elbow, jutting his chin in her direction and so Jax notices her as well.

"Motherfucker." Jax curses under his breath, shaking his head in brewing anger, contemplating his options for just a second, but then he's already dodging people left and right to hurry after them as well.

But he's stopped when Tara's friend Rayna practically steps in his way, her palm firmly on his chest, blocking his pursuit just as he sees Tara follow Logan outside, the door closing behind them right in front of his eyes.

"Hey, Teller." Rayna's just as short as Tara, and so she's leaning up on her tiptoes, her hand bracing against Jax's shoulder when she practically shouts in his ear. "Relax. She's fine. They're just talking." She pulls back to meet Jax's eyes, trying to reassure him with a look that all is still good and he's got nothing to worry about here, but then she gestures between herself and him. "Can we talk?"

His first thought is _'why?',_ but instead "Right now?" slips from his lips in obvious annoyance, his eyes traveling back to the door that Tara and her ex have disappeared behind just now.

"Yeah, now. It's important." Rayna says, already hooking her arm in his and dragging him along in the other direction with her, while he looks back at Opie for just a second, jutting his chin towards the door, hoping his friend will get the hint and follow Tara and Logan in his place.

The house belongs to the parents of a friend of Tino's, and when they got here she realized that she's actually been here before, and therefore she knows her way around well enough. So she's easily leading Jax down another hallway to some kind of study, filled with a heavy expensive-looking desk and filled build-in bookcases that reach from floor all the way to the ceiling of the room, and a big piece of paper taped to the door that reads 'keep out'.

She quickly steps inside, unlike the rest of the house finding this room still empty, and so she carries on through to the big window overlooking the backyard, already working the locks to pry it open.

Jax closes the door behind him even though it doesn't do much to drown out the music, but he quickly follows her to the window, helping her push it all the way open, before they're both lighting up a cigarette at the same time.

"What's up?" Jax speaks up first, a little curious about what Rayna could possibly want to talk to him about, but also in a rush to get this over with so he can track down Tara and Lockhart.

Rayna casually brushes her long auburn hair over one shoulder, she's normally the outspoken one, the one who says it like it is, so it surprises herself a little how nervous she suddenly feels about her rather spontaneous idea to confront Jax like this. But she needs to suss him out herself, needs to know she's not pushing her friend onto some asshole that'll only break her heart.

She flicks the ash from the tip of her cigarette into the red solo cup she'd just emptied a few moments earlier, looking up at him after taking one more drag and finally gets to the point. "Listen, Jax, Tara's been through some shit."

"I know. I was there." Jax interjects, before taking a deep drag himself.

But Rayna's not missing a beat, carries on as if Jax hadn't said a word. "She's still kinda going through some shit right now, you know?"

"Yeah, I know that too." He agrees, eyeing Rayna curiously, not really sure where she's going with all this.

But before he can ask that question out loud, Rayna's speaking up again. "Let me ask you something. She told me about the night you spend at her place, what happened between you two, or I guess what didn't happen, ... you know, right before those rumors started."

"Yeah," Jax confirms, raising his eyebrows at her in puzzlement. "So, ... what about it?"

"Well, it just made me wonder if maybe you were the one talking it up? Telling everyone you did her?"

"Are you serious?" Jax asks completely taken off guard, he hadn't seen that question coming at all.

"It's a very guy thing to do. You sure as shit wouldn't be the first." Rayna defends her reasoning for her accusations, her voice gaining more strength now, much to her own relief.

"I didn't." He blurts out in defense, shaking his head, and the expression on his face makes it clear that he doesn't like being accused of having done that in the least, but then his eyebrows scrunch together when he suddenly wonders out loud. "Wait, is that what she thinks? Does Tara think I'm the one who started those rumors?"

Rayna shakes her head at that, much to his relief. "No, she doesn't. This is all me. She doesn't even know I'm talking to you."

"Okay. Well, ... I had nothing to do with that, alright? That shit was fucked up. I didn't say anything to anyone. I'm not like that. I wouldn't fucking do that." Jax quickly clarifies, shaking his head in denial.

"Alright, alright, ... I had to ask, dude." Rayna replies nodding, slowly coming into her own again, her confidence returning. "Just looking out for my girl, you know?"

"Yeah." Jax nods his head, because as much as he doesn't like being accused of such a thing, he can appreciate someone trying to look out for Tara. "I get it." He eyes Rayna curiously a moment later. "That's it? Anything else?"

"Yeah, actually there is." Rayna nods in reply, clearing her throat for a second. "I know she's probably been giving you whiplash with her back and forth shit. Hot for you one second, then cold the next, am I right?"

Jax chuckles this time at Rayna's description of his turbulent relationship with Tara this far, because it's so spot on. "Yeah, you could say that."

Rayna's not smiling though when she carries on to explain, sounding dead serious when she says. "It's just, I feel like Tara's been under Emma's thumb for so long, and combine that with all the other shit that went down, she's just trying to figure shit out, you know? Who to trust, who to listen to ... who to fall for." She adds that last part with a tad of apprehension, while eyeing Jax curiously for a reaction.

"O-kay." Jax replies, stretching out the word, and even though he's already figured most of this out himself too, it still feels like Rayna's trying to tell him something else with all this, but he's not sure what, or if he's going to like it. "What are you saying? You want me to back off, or something?"

"No, but ..." Rayna examines her cuticles on her nails for just a second, not sure how to say this. "... it's just that some guys can be really cruel. I've been there myself, ... it's hurtful as fuck when somebody you really care for says just what you want to hear, but it turns out that none of it's actually true. Every look, every kiss, nothing but lies." She glares up at him.

"Jesus Christ." Jax blurts out in annoyance, shaking his head, obviously able to read between the lines of what Rayna's getting at now. "Look, I'm not some kind of douche bag that's playing her, alright? I really like her, ... I like her a lot."

"Good." Rayna nods relieved, before she adds. "So then you should know it might seem like she's trying to play _hard-to-get_ or something, but ... I swear she's not. I think she's just trying to figure out if your feelings for her are real."

"They are," Jax confirms instantly, but then he's wondering how he could possibly be any clearer about his feelings for Tara than he's already been.

"Alright. Good." Rayna nods her head again, wanting to believe Jax's words to be true, for Tara's sake. "If you really mean that, then I think you and her could be really good together, ... so just don't give up on her, she's worth it."

"I won't." Jax actually smirks, his eyebrows raised almost to his hairline, shaking his head a little when he adds. "I'm not going anywhere."

Feeling like her old confident self again, she taps her lighter against Jax's chest, smirking herself for the first time when she meets his eyes head-on. "I'm rooting for you, Teller, so don't make me fucking regret it. 'Cause if you hurt her, I'll hurt you. Got it?"

Jax nods, smirks right back. "Got it."

He means it. He wants Tara. He doesn't want to hurt her, but suddenly this whole little chat with Rayna's got his nerves on edge. Is he getting in too deep?

X

Logan's leaning against the trunk of a tree, shaking his head yet again at everything they've been talking about, but most of all he's still in disbelief that Tara would fall for a guy like Jax Teller, and he's made that known to her just now.

Tara's standing just a few feet away from him, her arms crossed over her chest, glaring up at him. "Is it really so unbelievable that someone other than you could like me?"

"Shit, Tar, that's not what I'm saying at all. What is unbelievable is you giving someone like him a shot. You're like this ... this sweet, innocent girl, and everyone knows that Teller's kind of a dick."

She takes a step closer, ignoring his comment about Jax altogether and is instead addressing his assumption about her. But she's lowering her voice a little this time when she replies in complete contradiction to the rumors she's been trying so hard to live down. "Look, just because I didn't jump into bed with you doesn't mean I'm sweet or innocent."

"What the hell's that supposed to mean?" Logan eyes her with new concern, because up until now he hadn't believed any of the gossip he'd heard from his friends. "Wait, are you actually sleeping with him? Jesus, Teller's like a walking petri dish, Tar. I really thought you were smarter than that."

Tara shakes her head, ignoring Logan's repeated jabs against Jax, and by some miracle she's not blushing at the mere accusation. "No, I'm not, but even if I was, it'd be none of your goddamn business. We've been broken up for months now, Logan."

Logan swipes his hand down his unshaven face, and Tara hates the relieved look that crossed over his features at her admission that she's not sleeping with Jax. But before she has time to process that, he's going full circle and coming back to how this whole conversation has started to begin with, about him having to hear from other people that her house had been broken into and that she'd been attacked, and that Jax had been there and saved her. "Broken up or not, I still care what happens to you."

Tara doesn't need to search his face to know that he means that. They cared about each other, despite everything Rayna has pointed out about their relationship earlier, they always cared. She liked Logan well enough, enough to explore the possibility of a relationship with him at Emma's urging, and enough to give the illusion of being a happy couple.

 _The football player and the cheerleader_ , ... Jesus, what a fucking cliché they'd been. The truth is, she cared and she knows he cared about her too, but her heart had never truly been in it. She wasn't in love with Logan, never had been, but they'd both made the best of it. It had simply been her trying to fit into the mold she'd been cast into, this self-conscious good girl, who's too scared to take things further, too scared to think outside the box, especially when it came to boys, love or sex.

But after that talk with Rayna earlier, she's decided to try to put that version of herself behind her, right along with the scared, unsure version she's been lately too. She's ready to really figure out who she is, not who everybody wants her to be, even if it'll be at the cost of her reputation. She nods her head at him, finally reacting to what he'd said. "I know. Maybe ... maybe I should've called you after what happened, but I didn't want you reading something into it ... like I was trying to get back together or something."

"Yeah, I get that. It just stung hearing all that shit from other people, you know?" Logan nods his head too, and then a little smile starts appearing on his face that doesn't at all reach his eyes though when he adds dejectedly. "Guess it hit home that you're not my responsibility anymore."

At that Tara actually scoffs, but there's a tinge of amusement in her voice when she misses no time at all to set him straight. "I wasn't your responsibility even when you were my boyfriend, 'cause Eisenhower hasn't been in office for a long fucking time."

"Right, sure." Logan agrees even though he doesn't truly see it that way, but at the same time he can't help but chuckle a little too, because this is such a _Tara-thing_ to say. And then, just a split second later he's jutting his chin in the direction of the house and the party behind her, at the leather glad guy that just showed up, leaning against a tree, cigarette in hand, who's clearly come out here to keep an eye on Tara. "You might wanna tell _him_ that too."

At that, Tara turns around, following Logan's gaze and spotting Jax immediately. A smile instantly grows on her face, and she raises her hand in a little wave, which Jax reciprocates.

Logan takes it all in, shaking his head and sighing as he steps up beside her, his gaze drifting from Jax back to her, the worry heavily edged into his voice. "I really hope you know what you're doing with him." He reaches out for her hand, giving it a quick little squeeze, before he says. "See you later, Knowles."

"Bye, Logan." Tara smiles up at him, glad at last they've come to some sort of understanding, or at the very least some kind of truce for now.

Logan starts walking back towards the house the same instance Jax starts to approach, both boys bypassing each other without so much as a word, just a loathing glance, apparently deciding simultaneously that avoidance is the best course of action to co-exist in Tara's orbit.

"Hey," Jax says when he comes to a stop just a few feet in front of her, extinguishing the last glimmer from his cigarette stump by squeezing it between his calloused fingertips, before dropping it carelessly into the grass by his feet and wiping his fingertips off on his jeans.

"Hey." She replies, seeming equally unsure, shoving her hands into her own back-pockets to stop herself from reaching out for him.

Jax looks back over his shoulder, his gaze on her ex walking away in the distance for just a second before he turns back around to meet Tara's eyes with raised eyebrows. He can't help his concern from showing, but then again, he might just be fishing for an excuse to beat Lockhart's ass. "Everything alright there?"

Tara sighs and visibly relaxes with Jax being here now, and with Logan gone, and the knowledge that by standing up for herself, something went right for her for once.

It certainly has been strange hearing Logan mention the same concerns she's been telling herself in her head, and has fought within her heart over the last couple of weeks, only to find herself now dismissing them all and defending her choices to him. Logan might not have agreed with her, but he sort of has agreed to disagree what her new choices are concerned, and she's simply decided to not let his cautious warnings about Jax get to her, won't allow herself to read too much into the words from her ex or anyone else's anymore. She's finally made up her mind. If Jax is all in, then so is she.

"Yeah." She finally nods her head, realizing that she hasn't answered him yet, then smiles when she adds. "Everything's good."

Then they stand there in complete silence, shyly looking and smiling at each other a little awkwardly for a few long beats, the only sound filling the air is the faint thumping of the bass and music coming from the house.

All-day Jax has imagined wrapping her in his arms and kissing her stupid, but now, between what Ope has pointed out to him earlier and his little chat with Rayna just a few minutes ago, he's suddenly not so sure with himself anymore, and he can't stand feeling like this.

He's fucking smitten, ...well, more than smitten actually, he's come to realize that he might just be a little bit obsessed about Tara Knowles. Someway, somehow, this girl has him wrapped around her finger without even knowing it. She's got him on some kind of an invisible line, cranking the reel and has managed to tighten the hook in his mouth before he even got a chance to taste the goddamn bait. And in all actuality, that should be throwing up huge red flags for him. _Shouldn't it?_ He can practically hear his uncle Bobby's voice when he recalls the words he's overheard him say once. _'Your heart will get you killed faster than a bullet, brother!'_

He's a sixteen-year-old guy, for fucks sake. It should be all about the physical shit, ... her pretty face, those nice tits, the tiny waist, and that perfect round ass. It should be about wanting to fool around, about wanting to fuck her, which he undoubtedly does want to do, but the fact that it's so much more than that with Tara, has him now realizing that it makes everything so much more complicated too. The fact that what he feels for her isn't just about sex should tell him this girl means trouble for him with capital T. _T for Tara ... Ha!_

If he was smarter, he'd tell himself that maybe he should back the hell off, be more cautious about this whole thing between them, you know, kinda like what she's been doing. Keep it easy, keep it fun, but also protect both their hearts from getting in too deep. Yeah, maybe he should take a cue from the smart girl standing right in front of him, and listen more to that cautious voice inside his head, instead of the joined forces of his dick and his heart. _Take it easy, Teller, play it cool. Save yourself, take a step back!_

Jax takes a step closer.

He's so fucked. There is no use, he just couldn't stop himself any longer from finally bridging the gap between them. His hands reached out for hers at the same time, tugging her forward so she'll step closer too, meeting in the middle again like last night in the truck, which makes her laugh a little and the sound melts away all his sudden doubts again, making his smile even brighter as they're holding each other's hands and penetrating gazes.

Fuck playing it safe, _and fuck me_ ... because for the first time ever he finds himself to be the one that wants to put a name to this, wants to define this _thing_ between her and him, he wants to know that there's no reason to be cautious and Ope is fucking wrong, that in this case with Tara, a kiss wasn't _just a kiss._

"Look, I -." - "Did you -." They both try to speak up at the same time, but then stop and laugh, before Tara juts her chin at him and says. "You first, ... what were you gonna say?"

"I was wondering ..." He takes a deep breath. _Here goes nothing._ "Are we gonna do this?" As soon as the words have left his mouth he's already wanting to kick himself for wording it so damn cryptically, - although in his defense, it made perfect sense in his head. Noticing the confused look that crosses her face though, he squeezes her hands and quickly tries again. "I realize we've only been out on one official date, but ... you and me, are we doing this, babe? Is this happening?" _Is this what a proposal would feel like? Nerve-wracking and nauseous?_

"Wait, ..." Tara looks up at him perplexed, but also a little amused when his meaning begins to finally dawn on her. Her heart's beating out of her chest, the butterflies inside her stomach are doing somersaults again, and there is no way in hell she can stop the toothy grin from stretching across her face when she asks him in reply. "Are you asking me to go steady?"

Taking the unchecked amusement on her face as a sign that this will play out in his favor, he bites the bullet and nods his head at her. "Yeah, I am." But in an attempt to play it off, he dials up the charm and quickly adds with a grin of his own. "Someone as fucking cute as you should definitely have a boyfriend."

She's head over heels for this guy, can feel it in every fiber of her being, but she kind of loves the nervous vibe coming off of him, loves knowing these feelings aren't one-sided, and so she teases him back. "And you're volunteering for the job? To be my boyfriend I mean?"

At that he actually laughs out loud, shaking his head at her smart mouth. He's certainly met his match with her, but unless he's reading the signs all wrong, he's sure he just got his answer whether or not they're _doing this,_ and he's fucking ecstatic. "You're a smartass, Knowles, you know that?"

But before she gets a chance to reply, he's already let go of her hands and is framing her face instead, holding her in place before he bends down a split second later and presses his lips against hers in an instantly scorching kiss.

Their tongues are dancing, slow and careful one second, then hurried and greedy the next. It makes her feel dizzy, and so she too reaches out, letting her hands slip under his open leather jacket, under the hem of his t-shirt, her fingertips gliding over his skin before finding the belt loops of his jeans to curl around to keep herself upright.

Kissing Jackson is so different from anyone she's ever kissed before him. It's just so much more. He tastes like cigarettes and mystery, smells like motor oil, adventure, and freedom. It's intense and raw and intoxicating. Combustive and passionate and volatile. It sends heat to her face, tingles down her spine, and goosebumps to her skin. It makes her heart race, and of course sparks a pulsing need between her thighs, and she can't believe that just a couple of hours ago she was trying to convince herself to walk away from this, walk away from him, and possibly never experience this with him at all.

But suddenly, it's Jax that makes the first move again, but this time by pulling away, meeting her eyes again when she opens them and then he suddenly drawls with a suggestive smirk. "Damn, babe, ... guess last night wasn't a fluke."

"What?" Tara asks breathlessly, looking up at him a bit confused. She can't think clearly right now, not with her cheeks all flushed, her head spinning, and still feeling prickly and tingly in all the wrong places from the kiss they've just shared.

"The way you kiss, it's ... it's somethin' else, I can't explain it, ..." He replies sounding breathless and earnest, but the way he's grinning back at her while still holding her face in his hands suggests he might be teasing her too when he adds. "... it's fucking surreal."

"Yeah." Tara agrees, sounding still breathless herself even though she's smirking now, and even though she's feeling all swoony at the moment, there's humor in her voice when she replies. "I know what you mean, I thought if you were a sucky kisser then I could get over you."

"Over me?" Jax repeats, his eyebrows raised, but his eyes are shining in amusement, when he asks in reply. "Why would you wanna get over me, when you haven't even been under me yet?"

"Oh, ... wow." Tara somehow manages to scoff and chuckle all at the same time, swatting him playfully in the chest, which makes him laugh too, when she asks. "Was that one of your lines you've warned me about?"

He's still chuckling, and she is too, both clearly enjoying this new carefree banter between them, but then he's pressing his forehead to hers when he answers. "Maybe." He takes a risk, dropping his hands to her waist and pulls her closer, pressing his hips into hers. And then he brazenly slides his hands even lower, palming her ass in both, loving the way her curves fill out those denim shorts she's wearing tonight, and giving it an appreciating squeeze. _Fuck, I've been wanting to do that for years._ But instead of voicing that thought out loud he raises one eyebrow up at her and asks playfully. "Is it working?"

"Your lines? Not really, no ..." Tara shakes her head at him, still smiling from ear to ear, but then bites her bottom lip right as she wraps her arms around his neck so she can pull him down towards her this time, suddenly feeling bold herself upon feeling his hands on her like this. "But maybe we should give kissing another try."

They grin at each other and then they kiss again, and much like before it turns passionate rather quickly, getting lost in each other's taste and touch and all the small little moans and groans that escape them, so much so that they don't even hear their friends approaching, before they're literally come to stand just a few feet away from them and speak up.

"Jesus, bro, let her come up for air every once in a while." Opie's humor-filled voice startles them enough to abruptly break the kiss.

Rayna and Tino laugh out loud in amusement, but Jax isn't all that amused, instead he rewards his tall friend with a glare in return for interrupting his time with Tara.

All the while Tara lowers her head, grinning, but trying to hide her face and her blushing cheeks in Jax's embrace, which he sort of helps her with by wrapping his arms around her back now and pulling her into his chest.

Before Jax or Tara can say anything though, Rayna's already talking now, sounding a little drunk already and gaining everyone's attention when she's stepping closer. "C'mon, you guys. We came here to partaaaayyyy, remember? It's your birthday, baby." She says, actually tugging on Tara's arm. "We can all hang in the basement, that's where the cool crowd's hanging." She laughs as if that's some kind of joke even though it's not, and then adds. "And there's better booze to choose from too than that watered-down keg shit in the kitchen. C'mon, ... let's do this."

Everyone's chuckling, and Tara outright laughs, she can't help it, she's feeling giddy, mostly because of what has just happened with Jax, but partly because Rayna's cheery mood seems to be contagious too. She looks up to him to see if he's okay with it too, and the look in his eyes, the smile on his face, and the subtle little nod he gives her, makes her agree a few seconds later. "Yeah, okay." She answers her friend, smiling brightly. "Let's go."

Tara has her arm around his waist, leaning into him, and he has his arm curled around her neck, pulling her closer too, pressing a little kiss against her temple as they make their way back towards the house.

She would be lying if she said that she doesn't feel a sudden moment of panic rush over her the closer they get to the house. Thanks to Logan she's well aware now that most people know she's been hanging out with Jax, but _hanging-out_ and actually _dating_ are two very different things in her opinion, and after the way they'd been scrutinized last night on their date, she can't help but dread how it'll be received by everyone else here tonight.

Of course it doesn't help that off the top of her head she can already think of at least ten girls from Charming High alone, not even counting Emma, who'll be pissed when they realize that Jax and her turn out to be more than just friends, but as soon as that thought flits through her mind, she's already chastising herself for doing that. She tries to remember the pep talk Rayna gave her earlier instead, and quickly reminds herself that she doesn't owe anyone an explanation for anything.

As if Jax can read her mind, he nudges his nose against her temple, gaining her attention just as they're about to take the steps up to the porch that'll lead them back into the house and into the midst of this party. "'Are you alright?"

She looks up at him for a long second, appreciating all the beautiful little features of his face that she can see more clearly now in the light that's coming from the house than she could out there in just the moonlight. _He's so goddamn handsome, it's fucking ridiculous._ She smiles and her heart feels like it's skipping a beat at the way he's smiling right back at her. "Yeah, I'm good."

They do turn a few heads here and there when they make their way through the house, but to Tara's surprise not nearly as much as she had expected. Tino leads the way to the basement, they all follow suit, where they're introduced to Max, the guy who actually lives here and is throwing this party, and his girlfriend Chelsea.

It turns out that Rayna was telling the truth about the basement though, it's less stuffy, less people, harder liquor, and the music can still be heard but it's not too loud, so that you can carry on a conversation without having to yell.

The group of them settle down around the old worn down sofa set in the middle of the main room.

Jax has taken a seat in the oversized armchair, pulling Tara with him to sit in his lap, kind of loving the fact that he can actually do that now, one arm curled around her waist, the other hand on her bare thigh, and the two of them get lost in conversation with each other almost immediately.

Opie, Lowell, Tino, Joe, Cassidy, Max's girlfriend Chelsea, and a few other people are also hanging around. Max is playing bartender, and Rayna's making herself busy as an impromptu waitress, taking everyone's drink order, and then hands them out with a flirtatious giggle as if she's actually angling for tips, which makes everybody laugh.

Tara's busy telling Jax about her day; the driving lesson that went to shit, the miracle that she's passed the driving test, and her dad handing her the keys to the Cutlass over their celebratory lunch. But for now, she's leaving out the lie she's concocted up with Rayna about staying the night at her place, so she'd be able to be here tonight.

In turn Jax shares his day with her too, although his wasn't quite as interesting, since all he did was go to work at TM for a couple of hours, then ran some errands with Ope, and shortly after he'd gotten ready to come here to this party to meet up with her.

Throughout their little talk, Jax has shrugged out of his leather jacket and has draped it over the armrest of the upholstered chair they're sitting in. He can't help himself but let his hand slide over it every now and then, feeling for the edges of the little rectangular box that holds the present he's bought for her earlier. He's downright itching to give it to her, but at the same time he wants to do it when they're alone, because he doesn't want to hear some smart ass remark from one of the guys about it, and so he keeps holding off.

Everyone seems to be having a good time, people come and go though, some heading out for good, some just heading upstairs and some finding refuge in the basement from the ongoings upstairs. So it shouldn't have been that big of a surprise when more than a handful of people that also go to Charming High eventually find their way into their midst, among them Emma and, her once again boyfriend, Bright.

When Emma sees Tara and Jax sitting so intimately together, she stops dead in her tracks for just a second, obviously surprised and completely caught off guard by that development, but she quickly tries to play it off, stepping further into the room, and coming closer to greet everyone.

"Happy birthday, Tar." She says, sounding almost genuine and smiling at her former friend, before her eyes drift to Jax, scrutinizing the way he has his arm wrapped around Tara in his lap.

"Thanks." Tara's still smiling, trying her damndest to appear unaffected by the arrival of Emma and the _Charming crowd,_ she herself used to belong to, downstairs.

However Emma and her friends keep giving them curious glances, and Jax can practically feel the sudden shift in Tara's mood, right along with the change in the whole room, and he takes that as his cue to finally whisk Tara off someplace to be alone with her, to finally present her with the gift he got her.

He nuzzles his nose into the crook of her neck, his stubble scratching against her sensitive skin making her squirm from the way it tickles her, and causing all eyes to fall on them when he whispers into her ear. "Wanna go someplace alone?"

Tara simply nods her head at him in answer, glad to disappear for a little while now that the mood has taken a nosedive, but just as she scoots off of Jax's lap, and he stands up too, grabbing his jacket, making it clear that they're leaving, Rayna's suddenly speaking up. "You can't leave now." She starts towards Tara, reaching for her hand to keep her from leaving. "No, no, no, no, you're the birthday girl, you can't go, we are just about to start playing a game."

Tara can't help but laugh, because Rayna's clearly had a few drinks too many already, but she still asks. "What game?"

"You know, ... spin the bottle, seven minutes in heaven." Rayna answers as if it's a no brainer.

Everyone chuckles, some shaking their head, but it's Joe that points out the obvious. "Shit, Ray, those are like sixth-grade kids games. If we're gonna play something, let's make it something good. Like a drinking game? Or strip poker or something?"

Rayna's undeterred though, flipping Joe off before she starts to explain with obvious excitement to her voice. "Trust me, we'll combine the two, and it'll be that much more fun now that us girls have boobs, and the guys are actually taller than us again."

Again, everyone laughs, and even though not everyone's convinced yet, Rayna's already ordering Tino and Joe around, telling them to move the coffee table out of the way to make room. Reluctantly everyone settles down, finding their spot in a big circle.

Tara and Jax share an unsure look with each other, but not wanting to be the spoilsports they too sit down at last.

But then a moment later, Jax can't help but speak up, draping his arm around Tara's shoulder when he says. "There's gotta be some way to get around it though, 'cause _my girl_ here ain't spending seven minutes on her birthday in a closet with someone other than me."

 _My girl?_ Tara's head snaps up to look at him in obvious surprise, ignoring everyone else's stunt expression, right along with Emma's glare.

Just when she was beginning to get used to being so close to him, her heartbeat picks up speed again at the thought that he'd just referred to her as _his girl_. It's stupid really, considering she knows that they'd just talked outside about this, but to actually have him acknowledge their new relationship status out loud in front of everyone brought out a whole new wave of emotions she'd never experienced before.

"I agree." Cassidy's voice brings Tara back out of her thoughts, then she gives her boyfriend Joe right beside her a look, before she adds. "Let's say one of us doesn't wanna go, then what?"

"Alright, let me think ..." Says Rayna, comically tapping her chin as if she's actually deep in thought. "Okay, so if you spin the bottle, and it ends on someone that you don't wanna go in the closet with, then you have to drink ... and spin again."

"Ahhh, come on, that shit's way too lame, feels like sixth grade all over again," Tino replies, but then a moment later proceeds to rub his hands together like some evil mastermind before he adds his own twist to the game. "Let's make it a little more interesting. How about if you don't wanna go in the closet with someone, not only do you have to take a shot, but you also gotta lose a piece of clothing, and then spin again."

Laughter and approval ensues, and then another round of laughter follows when Jax suddenly grabs his leather jacket and drapes it around Tara's shoulder, much to her surprise. He smirks, his eyes traveling over Tara right beside him before he turns his attention back to the audience he's got and says. "No way in hell you motherfuckers get to see shit I haven't even seen yet."

"Jax." Tara blurts out and shoves him playfully in the shoulder in faux outrage, but then she can't help the smirk from stretching over her face anymore than she can keep her cheeks from blushing.

He cups her cheek then, leaning down to give her a kiss, when Rayna's jerking him away by his other arm before their lips make contact. "Nu-hu, not so fast, Teller, there ain't no making out unless you spin that bottle."

Everyone laughs again, even Jax, but it's Bright that speaks up between the laughter, looking right at Jax when he says with a grin on his face. "Jesus, Teller, never seen you act this possessive over a chick before."

At that Jax smirks down at a still blushing Tara right beside him for just a second, before he curls his arm around her neck, turning his attention back to the group and replies. "Guess there's a first time for everything."

Tara hates herself for doing it, but she just can't stop herself from glancing at Emma, even though she should've known she wouldn't find approval in her eyes.

Rayna claps her hands together in excitement, bringing everyone's attention back to her when she's looking around the group of people and asks. "Okay, so ... who wants to go first?"

X

Author's Note: I really hope you liked it. If you have a minute to spare, leave me a few words please, to let me know what you think. Thank you!


	17. My best friend has finally fallen

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

 _Oh God, this sucks! This sucks so fucking much!_

There's an upside and a downside to the amended rules of this stupid mash-up of games Rayna suggested they all should play. The obvious upside is that you don't have to end up in a confined dark space for seven minutes with someone you really don't want to. But the downside is that the more people turn down their potential seven-minutes-in-heaven partner, the more alcohol flows, the more clothes and such are getting discarded, and the longer this damn game continues to drag on and on, with seemingly no real end in sight.

And there is definitely a reason why this game was more popular back in Junior High and is normally played with just a handful of people, because this is so _not_ working, not with a group this large with several couples who're all refusing to _canoodle_ with someone other than their boyfriend or girlfriend or crush. _Not that she can blame them!_

Tara tries her best not to think about the fact that she's slowly starting to feel the effects of the shots she's had to take, nor that she's running out of things to shed. So far she's lost Jax's leather jacket, her earrings, her bracelet and her sandals, and Jax right beside her has also lost his watch, his belt, his socks and his shoes too. There aren't many things left to take off for either one of them, and it certainly makes Tara nervous, while Jax seems to have slipped on an unreadable mask again for now. If he's feeling nervous at all, he doesn't show it, instead, he seems to be oozing nothing but confidence at the moment, which she once more finds herself envious of.

Kelly, one of Max's and Chelsea's friends who've also joined the game, just spun the bottle and it has landed on Lowell, and when both agree to go for it, applause and whistles and the usual crude suggestions from the guys follow as they're being ushered into the closet. Chelsea's got the watch to keep track of the time, while Max and Tino hurry upstairs to get some more liquor, and that's when Rayna enlists Tara to help her find a bathroom in her somewhat inebriated state.

Tara absentmindedly reaches for her shoes and is just about to slip them on again when several people from the group around her speak up in protest, nearly all of them already in different stages of undress themselves.

But before she can even get out a word to defend herself, Rayna's already doing it for her, her speech slurred. "Jesus, guys, would you calm the fuck down. She's just putting them back on to go the bathroom real quick."

Jax, still sitting on the floor, casually curves his hand up her bare leg as Tara comes to a stand right beside him, and she realizes right then that the alcohol she's consumed still doesn't diminish how his touch affects her. All she can hope is that the goosebumps rising along the path his hand just took aren't as easily noticed by anyone else as they've been clearly noted by Jax, at least judging from the satisfied smirk that crossed his face just now. She somehow manages to smile down at him despite her prickling skin and galloping heart. "I'll be right back."

"I'll be right here." He replies, playfully winking at her when Rayna grabs her by the arm to pull her up the stairs along with her, in search of the nearest bathroom.

There's a line, of course, but thankfully it's short and once the two friends are inside and behind the locked door, Rayna rushes for the toilet while Tara just can't hold her tongue another second longer, pulling the v-neck of her shirt away to glance at her own bra beneath at the same time. "I know you're drunk and all, Ray, but what the hell were you thinking with this stupid game?"

Rayna's already taken a seat on the toilet, ignoring her friend until she's done doing her business, glad that the music is drowning out the trickling noise, the only other audible sound is Tara's ongoing protest of what's to come. "I have barely anything left to take off, the next thing will have to be my belt, and after that, I've only got my shirt and my shorts left ... ugh, this is so not how I thought this night would go. I'm soo not drunk enough to strip in front of everyone." She adds, wetting her fingertips to try taming some fly-away hairs near her temple.

The toilet flushes behind her, and a moment later Rayna steps up next to Tara by the sink, washing her hands and surprising the hell out of her when she speaks up, sounding way more sober suddenly than she's been letting on. "I thought it would give the two of you a way to really come out as a couple. You know, make it officially official."

"Wait." Tara stops fussing with her hair and fully turns towards her friend, grasping Rayna by the shoulders and turning her so they're standing face to face, before she questions out loud in total doubt. "You're not really drunk, are you?"

"I am ..." Rayna makes a gesture indicating something small with her thumb and forefinger. "... but just a little, though." Then she shrugs, grinning instantly when Tara stares back at her completely slack-jawed for a long couple seconds.

"Oh. My. God." Tara enunciates each word, her eyes going wide in disbelieve. "What ... wait ... I mean, why?" She tries to form an actual question, but the right words evade her, considering she could've sworn her so-called 'wing-woman' was pretty much plastered already, only to find out now that it isn't so at all. But on some level, she probably should've known, because out of all her female friends, Rayna's one that can hold her liquor and more often than not outdrinks the rest of them.

"It's just that if everyone thinks you're drunker than you actually are, you can sorta-kinda get away with way more shit than when they think you're sober." She tries to explain. "Like if you do something stupid, you can just blame it on the alcohol the day after."

Tara shakes her head. "Why though ... why tonight?"

"This way it'll look like drunk old me convinced Jax and you to play, giving you two a chance to get everyone used to the idea, instead of it looking like you played just so you could rub your new relationship status into everyone's face. Get it?" Rayna's grinning again, completely ignoring the stunt expression on Tara's face and instead continues talking. "Although it's so obvious that biker boy's got a thing for you, game or no game. Anyone can tell by the way he keeps looking at you."

"What do you mean? How's he looking at me?" Tara asks out loud, because even though she's been blissfully aware of all the little looks Jax has been giving her, and the affection she thinks she can see reflecting back at her in his eyes, she finds herself longing to hear it confirmed by someone else, to reassure herself that she isn't fooling herself by looking at the whole situation with rose-colored glasses and seeing something that isn't really truly there.

Rayna smirks. "You know, like, how he's been looking at you, like ... like you're a sexy little Rubik's Cube or something, and he's having the time of his life tryin' to figure you out."

At that Tara actually snorts, reminded suddenly of Jax's frustrated outburst from just last night on their way to Lodi, when he'd asked her why she is the way she is.

 _'Why are you like this?'_

 _\- 'Like what?'_

 _'Like how you are?'_

Yeah, he was certainly _not_ having the time of his life trying to figure her out then.

As if Rayna can read her thoughts, she adds. "Dude, have you not noticed how he's been acting towards you? Or the pissy looks he threw at the guys when that damn bottle landed on you?"

But again before Tara can follow her train of thought and speak up, Rayna's beating her to it, smirking even wider when she adds. "And _oh my God,_ the jealous looks those girls threw your way when Jax refused them and started chucking shots and taking shit off instead." She lets out a giggle. "That shit was priceless, T!"

"I know." At that Tara smirks herself, because she couldn't help but notice the envious looks thrown her way either, nor could she ignore how oddly satisfying it made her feel to have Jax turn every single one of them down, presumably because of her.

"And fucking Emma." Rayna interrupts her thoughts again, chuckling out loud and grinning back at her mischievously. "Girl, I thought she was gonna choke on her own spit when she saw you sitting on Jax's lap."

They both giggle at that, mostly because Rayna's description is spot on, Emma had looked like she was about to keel over. "If I were you though, I would've straddled him right then and there and would've probed his tonsils with my tongue, you know, just really stick it to her."

"Really?" Tara muses, her face contorted in shameless amusement, before she shakes her head no a moment later. "No, that's not really my style."

"Well, I'm petty like that!" Rayna adds with a shrug, before making another observation. "Is it not your style because you're still feeling a little bad?" When she sees the barely-there nod of Tara's head, she shakes her head and goes on to advise her. "You need to get over that already. I mean, it's not like you stole her boyfriend or something. He was never hers, T, and he was never going to be hers. You have nothing to feel bad about. You're into him and he's totally into you too, and thanks to my brilliant idea to play this game, it kinda let everyone else see it too, including fucking Emma Roth."

Tara snorts again and raises her eyebrows at Rayna's mentioning of her 'brilliant idea', this time shooting her friend a _'are you serious_ ' look. But as she thinks about what else Rayna has said, she keeps quiet, not sure what to say, she just manages to nod at last, while Rayna rambles on, repeating herself in not so many words. "I'm just saying, he's turned down every chick, and you've turned down every guy."

"I know."Tara's finally speaking up again, then gestures to herself though, to her clothes. "But because of your brilliant idea I'm now down to just a belt, shirt, and shorts. I really don't wanna end up in my underwear, Ray."

Rayna takes a step back, giving her a measured look for a moment. "Well, what are we talking about here? Some lacy-see-through stuff? Granny panties? Hearts or polka dots or ... what?"

Tara sighs, lifting her thin black cap sleeve shirt that barely covers her midriff, to reveal her black bra for Rayna's inspection, who nods in approval a second later. "This isn't bad at all. It's kinda sexy actually, in a kind of simple way, but not see-through or anything."

Tara turns to the left and then to the right in front of the mirror, examining herself in profile from both sides. "Yeah, I mean, ... it could pass as a bikini top, don't you think?"

"Yeah, it totally could." Rayna agrees, but then in typical Rayna-fashion she gestures to Tara's crotch and blurts out. "Lemme see what you're working with down there though?"

"I don't care what they'll say, I'll down twenty shots if I have to, but I'm not taking my shorts off." Tara protests, tugging her shirt back in place all the while shaking her head vehemently. "No fucking way."

"Holy shit, baby," Rayna replies in shock instantly, then her eyes are glued to Tara with a look of pride and approval, and Tara should've known that nothing gets past her friend when Rayna finally speaks up and accuses her a breath later. "You totally put on something sexy in case Teller and you end up knocking boots, didn't you?"

"No I didn't." She protests way too quickly, and knows that in her friend's eyes it makes it seem like she's right. In truth though, she's nowhere near ready to have sex with Jax just yet, no matter how frustratingly aroused he makes her with just the simplest touch. That being said, kissing and fooling around has certainly crossed her mind when she chose what to wear earlier today. And imagining now where the night might lead, combined with the alcohol she's consumed, has a grin growing on her lips even though she tries so hard to suppress it.

"Un-fucking-believable, T." Rayna stares at her with a hint of disbelieve and awe. "A couple hours ago I had to convince you to give the guy a shot, and here you've gone a complete one-eighty on me, wearing sexy underwear and ready to jump him."

"I'm not ready to jump him." Tara rebuffs, shaking her head, but then glances back in the mirror, fidgeting with her hair again and fighting to contain her ever-growing smirk.

"Yeah, okay, sure," Rayna replies giggling sarcastically, nudging her hip against Tara in a playful way when she too turns to look at herself in the mirror. "Whatever you say, T."

"It's a matching black thong, okay? Happy now?" Tara huffs, giving Rayna a ticked off side-eye when she adds in explanation. "I just wanted to feel pretty, for myself, _not him_. There's no way these shorts are coming off tonight, not for this game, and not for Jax either."

"Alright, if you say so." Rayna blurts back, another teasing smile on her face, but then surprises her when she adds a moment later. "On second thought though, the shirt should probably not come off either, not as part of the game anyways." She winks.

"What?" Tara meets her eyes in the mirror now, clearly confused. "But you just said it looks like a bikini."

"It does, but we're not at the pool or the beach." Rayna's swiping the pad of her fingers beneath her eyes to fix her smudged eyeliner, all the while holding Tara's gaze in the mirror and goes on to explain her sudden train of thought. "You know how girls want a _badass bad-boy_ , who's still sweet and good to them though? Well, guys, ... guys want a _good girl_ , one that's only naughty for them. You get what I'm sayin'? Teller will lose his shit if you're taking your shirt off for everyone to see."

Tara mulls over what Rayna's just thrown at her for just a split second, before she fires back. "Yeah, but he'll also lose his shit if I agree to seven-minutes-in-heaven with someone else." _Damned if I do, damned if I don't!_ She pins Rayna down with an angry glare. "This is all your fault, you know?"

"How was I supposed to know that you two are the most unluckiest people in the world. I mean, what are the odds that out of all the times you and him have spun that damn bottle, it wouldn't at least once end on either of you." Rayna tries to justify herself.

"The odds aren't great when there's like fifty people playing." Tara huffs in annoyance, obviously exaggerating the number of players, before she adds. "Maybe ... maybe we'll just have to bow out, and go upstairs and dance or something."

"I'll figure something out, T, I've got a plan," Rayna says suddenly, turning back towards her friend now to get her full attention and giving her a nod. "I'll get Jax and you in that closet. And after you can bow out like everyone else did coming out of that closet, and go do your _own thing_." She gives her a knowing look, before she sing-songs with a smirk. "Bow chicka wow wow."

Tara ignores her teasing though, instead she's feeling slightly alarmed at what Rayna might do next. "How? What are you gonna do?" She wonders out loud, not sure she can take any more surprises from her friend tonight.

"Just trust me, okay?" Rayna tries to reassure her, but then adds a moment later, contradicting her own optimism that it will all work out. "But ... just in case I fail, I'll just act sick, alright? And give you and Jax a reason to bail with me, okay?"

X

The first thing Tara notices the moment they make their way down the stairs is that Max is shirtless now, getting ogled by every girl in the room. And the second thing she notices is that a few people have apparently left, most notably Lowell, Kelly, Bright, and Chelsea, leaving the circle of potential players a tad bit smaller again.

She shoots Rayna another glare, but Rayna's ignoring her, already back to playing the part of the tipsy goofball, giggling and stumbling a little now that all eyes drift to them for a moment as they're finding their way back to the game.

"You missed two spins, girls," Tino speaks up, reaching out his hand to Rayna to help her sit down when it looks like she's about to trip over her own two feet, before he adds. "And a little bit of drama too."

"Really?" Rayna blurts out in wonder, obviously fishing for someone to explain what happened.

Tara turns her attention to Jax, returning his smile and taking his offered hand as she takes a seat in her spot right beside him, before she kicks off her shoes again and whispers to him to explain the unspoken question of their long absence. "There was a line."

"And also I was feeling a little sick," Rayna adds with a slur, loud enough for everyone to hear, and so she quickly smiles. "I feel better now though."

"So here's what went down, ladies." Ben, who's taken a seat in Bright's former spot right next to Emma, suddenly pipes up to fill them in on what they've missed. He's clearly enjoying this game, at least judging by the way he can barely contain the smirk on his face when he explains and gestures to each player he's referring to with the lit cigarette in his hand. "So Mel got Max, and she was cool, but Max refused and lost his shirt. Then Max got Em, and that time Max was cool, which pissed off Chelsea, and when Em seemed cool with it too, it pissed off Bright, then Em changed her mind because of Bright, and lost her socks, and that's why it's now Em's turn. Although Bright split." _Ahhh, that explains why Chelsea and Bright must've left._

 _Holy shit! Are Emma and Bright already over again?_

Tara and Rayna share a quick glance, clearly wondering the same thing, before both their eyes land on a smiling Emma, who doesn't seem the least bit affected by the fact that her boyfriend has apparently stormed off, instead she quickly reaches for the bottle and gives it a fast enthusiastic spin.

Just like every other time before, there's quiet chatter among some, laughter and smiles among others, nobody really paying all that much attention as the bottle spins and spins around, again and again, seemingly losing a little bit of momentum with each pass.

But when it starts to really slow down, everyone grows quiet and their attention is back on the bottle, and just when it looks like it might stop on Tino, or maybe even make it to Rayna right next to him, which due to the rules they've all agreed on beforehand would mean a do-over for Emma, the bottle excruciatingly slowly moves past both, only to finally come to a complete stop pointing right at Jax. _Of course!_

Maybe Tara's only imagining the tension that suddenly fills the air, but she could swear it's there, and it's real, feeling the attention in the room drift to her for a moment now when she glances between Emma and Jax, before shooting Rayna another knowing look too.

All eyes are on Emma a second later though, waiting to hear if she'll refuse first, which would mean she'd have to drink, strip and spin yet again, or if she's game to seven-minutes-in-heaven with her proposed match Jackson Teller, and with her agreement leaving it up to Jax to take her up on it or not, and refuse on his part.

After all the refusals Jax has dished out so far tonight, it should've made it clear to Emma that he's going to turn her down too, but apparently that doesn't stop Tara's former best friend from giving him a salacious smirk and wink, and a not so subtle nod, letting him know she's up for pretty much _anything_ with him. The usual suggestive claps, shouts, and whistles erupting by the half-naked and already tipsy crowd all around them, and even has one of the other girls giving Em a high five in open approval. _What a bitch!_

Truthfully, it really hadn't bothered Tara much when the other girls had tried to see if Jax was interested or not, because one, she wasn't nor has she ever been particularly close with any of them, and two, of course, she knew he'd turn them down, and therefore it had all just been harmless fun and games, leaving her smiling and laughing along with everyone else.

But this? Yeah, there was no denying that this felt like a deliberate _low blow_ directed right at her!For Emma to actually do this though, it fucking hurt, which was undoubtedly her goal, and Tara can sense that the majority of the people in the room, the ones who know that Emma and her had always been inseparable best friends, know it too. And like the vulture's that they are, Tara could see it on their faces that they were obviously hoping for more drama. They would probably love it if a fight would break out between Emma and her, and because of that very reason, Tara plasters on a smirk of her own instead, refusing to give them anything else to snicker or gossip about, and also refusing to give Emma the satisfaction of seeing the hurt she'd just inflicted.

"Sorry." Jax shakes his head, not really sounding sorry at all though as he's giving Emma an uninterested look, and with it he's bringing Tara out of her thoughts and drawing her attention wholeheartedly back to him again too, along with everyone else for just a second.

Eyes flicker back and forth between Emma and Jax again, as some of them let out an "Uhhhhhhhhh" and "Buuuuuurrn" to obviously tease her now after Jax's rather unapologetic refusal. Tara however can't bring herself to even look back at her former friend this time, not even wanting to know how she's reacting to Jax turning her down or the way everyone's teasing her this time, and so she keeps her eyes locked on Jax right beside her instead.

And just as quick as it had started, the teasing stops again when Jax quickly grabs the shot glass Tino has just filled for him and gulps it down without a second thought, then reaches up and curls his fingers around the collar of his black t-shirt, right before pulling the garment over his head in that ridiculously sexy way only boys do, before carelessly tossing it someplace behind him, leaving him bare-chested in all of his chiseled glory.

Cheers and applause erupt from all the girls in the room this time, and despite his best efforts, Jax's full lips lift in a sexy grin, like he knows exactly what kind of effect he has on every female in the room. Everyone already knows that he's a far cry from the lanky teenager he was when he first shot up to six feet height like a weed back in eighth grade, but usually, it's a day at the lake or an angry fistfight that has him shrugging out of his shirt, not getting ogled so openly by all the girls. Over the years he's filled out quite nicely, and from the looks of it, he knows it too, since he has clearly no shame, flexing his pecs and arms for his captive audience in the room, which draws a genuine smirk and little chuckle from Tara now too and has him winking and blowing a kiss to her when he notices.

"This damn game is rigged. Why the fuck are only guys shirtless so far?" Tino complains out loud, interrupting the girly cheers, looking around the circle of female players when he calls out over all the noise. "It's about time one of y'all to show some real skin."

"I agree. Let's get on with it." Opie adds through a cloud of smoke he's just exhaled, tossing the filter of his cigarette into the red plastic cup he's been using as an ashtray, and drawing attention back to the game instead, when he nods back at Jax from his seat right across from him. "Your turn. Make it count, bro."

"Yeah, yeah ... I'm on it, I'm on it." Jax laughs, grinning wide as he's linking and flexing his fingers in front of him, overextending them to the point that his knuckles make an audible popping noise and has everyone chuckling, before he leans forward and finally gives the bottle a forceful spin himself with a silent wish on his mind.

As the bottle spins, there are a few quick words thrown back and forth between the guys now, one after the other boasting how much they're benching these days with how many reps, and so on and so forth, but it's all just white noise to Tara when her focus is divided between Rayna and Tino whispering back and forth in what seems like an argument of some kind, and the still spinning bottle right in front of them.

The bottle loses force, slowing down more with each pass, and just like all the previous times before, the room grows quieter again the slower the bottle spins.

Seemingly on its last go around, the clear vodka bottle inches further ever so slowly, when out of the blue Rayna points at the TV set sitting in the corner of the basement, that's been playing muted music videos on MTV since they've gotten here, and shouts. "Holy shit, is she fucking naked?"

And just as expected everyone's attention turns to the television screen simultaneously, Jax and Tara's included, taking in the scene of a woman thrashing seductively in a bathtub, yet clearly wearing some kind of clothing that's clinging to her, contradicting to what Rayna supposedly just saw.

"Fuck no." Replies Ben in disappointment, realizing that it's Meat Loaf's 'I'd do anything for love' video. "This video's ancient, she's not showing shit. Just a big tease." He explains, but Rayna argues that she saw nipples, swearing that she did, and Ben accusing her of being too drunk to know what the hell she saw, just as everyone turns their attention back to the bottle, realizing that it has, in fact, come to a stop pointing at none other than Tara.

"Thank fuck, finally," Jax exclaims as an impossibly wide smirk stretches over his face, and he's already scrambling to his feet, his hand tugging on her arm to get her up with him, causing her to both smile and blush when their friends applaud and laugh out loud at Jax's rather exuberant reaction.

Tara's obviously feeling relieved that they've finally gotten lucky in this game, and yet she can't shake the nervous flutter of butterflies in her stomach, caused by the whistles and shouts from everyone, and his touch, when Jax manages to pull her up and tugs her flush against him.

For the first time since they've decided to play this stupid game, she's actually really enjoying herself, and because of it a glimpse of the old Tara shines through again, and she can't help but tease him for just a second. "Wait a minute." She says loudly, trying to be heard over everyone else talking and teasing, and it has the desired effect, because they quiet down when she places her hand against the middle of Jax's bare chest to take a step back from him. But her smirk is lopsided, and there's a real twinkle of mischief in her eyes when she adds. "Don't I get a chance to refuse?"

Laughter and shouting erupts all around them, everyone's clearly amused by her teasing Jax for a change, even Jax it seems. And so when she's playfully reaching for her belt, Jax just raises his eyebrows at her in a challenge, but is already shaking his head in an _'I can't believe this'_ kind of way when he gruffly replies. "Don't you fuckin' dare, babe. That shit ain't even funny." And just like that he's already grabbed her by both her wrists and tugged her closer again, before spinning her around and ushering her forward ahead of him. His hands firmly on her hips now, steering her in the direction of the closet, while their friends erupt in another bout of laughter just as he barks an order at her out loud. "Get your ass in this closet, Knowles."

The suggestive ribbing the guys have been doing to each other all night starts up again, and just like before she's not really paying them any mind, too focused on her own heartbeat pounding in her ear at the moment, but that all ends when the damn closet door is being pulled open by none other than Ben Tatum himself, gesturing with his hand for them both to step in while grinning first at her, before focusing his attention on Jax right behind her. "How many times you think you can get it done in seven minutes, Teller?" Ben muses, obviously teasing, and chuckles all around follow.

Jax smirks back rather smugly. "This might be news to you, Tatum, but not everyone's a minute-man like you."

The implication of his words has heat rush through her body, undoubtedly making her blush even deeper, but she refuses to comment or acknowledge what either one of them just said. The old Tara would've had a smart ass remark for both, but it appears that old confidence of hers is gone again just as quickly as it had appeared, because Tara finds herself speechless instead.

Jax and Tara are both smiling despite getting practically shoved into the closet a beat later, he has to duck his head a bit because of his height, and sweetly pushes some empty hangers out of the way for her too. Then they're both turning back towards their friends just as Max taps a finger at the watch in his hand, telling them that their seven minutes are about to start as soon as the second hand starts over, and it's in that moment that Tara catches Rayna's smirk and wink from across the room, and the realization hits her all at once that all of this has been her doing.

"You've got seven minutes, lovebirds. Make it count." Max teases and just like that the door is closed in their faces and they find themselves standing incredibly close in utter darkness. At first they can't see anything, but since the basement had been rather dimly lit itself, it only takes them a few blinks and seconds for their eyes to adjust to make out each other's face again.

They stand frozen for a couple more seconds, neither making a move, eyes trained on one another, the voices on the other side of the door become more and more muffled, letting them know that their friends are stepping away, and with it a tension-filled silence settles between the two of them instead, hinting at the possibilities of what will happen now.

Tara can't really understand what it is she's feeling, maybe it's knowing that they're on a set time limit, that their friends are mere feet away, that he's still deliciously shirtless, or maybe it's the fact that this right here is pretty much solidifying that they're an item now and therefore the news will surely spread like a wildfire during a drought, but whatever it is, all she knows is that this is just different than how she's ever felt before, and it's so damn scary, but at the same time so incredibly exciting too.

In all actuality, it has only been seconds since they've stepped in here, but she's become intensely aware of their proximity to each other, the way he's inched even closer in the already small space, his hands on her hips again, holding her to him and pressing his body against hers too. And even though it sounds like such a damn cliché right out of some girly romance novel, but Tara swears the warmth of his body, his hands on her, and his scent filling her nostrils, mixed with his mere breaths feathering against her cheek, is making her weak in the knees and honestly a little dizzy in her head too.

Tara sighs deeply, focusing on that inhale and exhale of air, wishing for her stupid nerves to settle again, because how fucking embarrassing would it be if she was to actually faint right now while standing nose to nose with him. She'd never be able to live that down, and so to break this spell she's finding herself under, she's the one to break the ice and finally speaks first. "What -."

Her words are cut off when Jax is instantly silencing her with a near bruising kiss, pressing his lips to hers, his hands suddenly curving around the sides of her neck and jaw, the tips of his long fingers disappearing in the hair at her nape, angling her face and holding her in place just how he needs her. But before the kiss can deepen, he pulls back just enough that their lips part again, his nostrils flaring as he draws in a deep breath through his nose, a look of longing etched into his young face when he searches her eyes for just a second. What for, she's not sure.

Tara hesitates herself for just a heartbeat or two, but then slips her hands upward across his bare chest, trying not to think too hard about the fact that she's allowed to touch him like this now, before stopping at the back of his head and letting his silky blond hair slide through her fingers. Then she's the one to suddenly pull him closer and pressing her lips against his first this time, instantly deepening the kiss, and this seems to be what he's been waiting for, a sign from her that she's into it, that she wants this too, because the next thing she knows he's suddenly turning and walking her the few inches towards the back wall of the closet.

He's caging her in with his much larger frame, one of his hands slips down, across her shoulder, his palm grazing the side of her breast, the tip of his thumb just a fraction of an inch away from her already puckered nipple, before he stops said hand at her hip again, tightening his grip on her, before groping needy at the fleshy curves of her ass and at the same time grinding his hips against hers too.

The sensations he's evoking are too much, and it's clear that he feels the same when he breaks the kiss just long enough to whisper the words "Jesus Christ, you feel so good" against her mouth, which has her mumbling back at him in a breathy gasp. "You too."

A heavy sense of possession is radiating off of him, from the way he's holding her face determinedly still to better explore her mouth, kissing her like his life depends on it, the way he's using his other hand to grope her, while simultaneously pinning her to the wall with his body and grinding into her for his own pleasure too.

He has taken complete control over all of her, and even though Tara never even imagined that she'd be into that sort of thing, - especially after what happened with Michael Dunley -, she now shockingly realizes that him taking charge like this is turning her on in ways she didn't think were humanly possible. It's baffling to her, but it doesn't make it any less true, because his domineering hold on her has electric sparks of desire shoot straight through her, lighting every nerve in her body up like a fuse, and leaving her eager and pliant in his strong and apparently very capable hands. _Jesus Christ indeed!_

This knowledge changes everything, and at the same time it explains so much! Like why her best efforts to have a relationship with Logan amounted to nothing. Why even though Logan is certainly good-looking, the attraction she felt for him was never more than skin deep. And it all made sense now, because, despite his jock status, Logan had not once made her feel like he was crazy with need for her, like Jax was doing now. He'd never wanted her enough to shut everything else out, and in turn she'd never wanted him either. All in all, Logan's touch had barely registered as a fizzle, while Jax's touch is igniting fireworks deep within.

 _Is this the difference between liking someone and loving them?_ With that thought any remaining doubt she'd had about her feelings towards Jax evaporated into thin air. She knows now that Jackson Teller will change her life, her whole world, and her with it, in more ways than she could even imagine yet.

They're so lost in each other that they lose any sense of time too, and so it's no real surprise when the door is suddenly yanked open, causing them to get caught red-handed in a hot and heavy make-out session and startled by the whoops and hollers from their friends.

Laughter and teasing erupts, but it's all good-naturedly, and Tara's thankful that she's still somewhat hidden from view by Jax's much larger body and can at least try to compose herself before having to show her face. Jax seems to have the same idea, because with his back still turned to his friends, he's reaching between them, trying his best to adjust the hard-on to make it less obvious, which is easier said than done considering he's still shirtless and has nothing to conceal it with.

Tara can't help but feel a little bad for him since she's played a part in his physical reaction, then their eyes meet, exchanging mirthful yet knowing looks, when a heavy hand lands on Jax's shoulder, trying to tug him back repeatedly. Some of the chatter of their friends start to intrude the little bubble they've found themselves in, telling them both that time's up and to come out of there already, and right as Jax turns to get this over with, knowing he'll most likely have to face some ridicule over the still obvious bulge in his pants, Tara surprises him when she turns with him and with it giving him a bit more time to recover.

He's got to admit he's impressed by how inconspicuously she manages to turn and step ahead of him, her hands tugging on his to keep him as close as possible, and with it, she's making it more than clear to him that she'd prefer that the rest of the basement crowd wouldn't find out just how much she's aroused him in just a matter of seven minutes.

They're both back to completely ignoring the suggestive comments and questions thrown at them, and he instead wraps his arms around her waist from behind, leaning in to whisper in her ear. "Let's get the hell out of here."

"Okay." Tara nods in agreement, looking back at him over her shoulder, she whispers. "Are you good?"

Just one corner of his mouth turns up, right along with his eyebrows, but his quick glance down to his own crotch is so fast and nearly imperceptible that she's sure nobody else is catching on to the meaning behind his next words. "Yeah, much better now."

They finally break apart just enough to grab their things off of the floor to quickly redress, announce their exit, and moments later climb the staircase to head upstairs, under the protests of their friends who are trying to get them to stay and continue playing instead.

X

For some privacy, Jax brings her to the same room where he'd had his little chat with Rayna earlier tonight, glad to find it still empty so he'll finally get the chance to give her the present he got her for her birthday.

Tara looks wearily around the room, her eyes stopping for a moment on the mahogany-colored leather loveseat, with all its possibilities, before she decides to focus on the oversized bookcases instead. She has her hands stuffed into the back pockets of her denim shorts, stepping closer and trying to distract herself by reading some of the titles on the spines of the countless books, her stiff posture giving away that she's a little bit nervous to be completely alone with him again so shortly after they've just been all over each other in that basement closet.

"You okay, babe?" Jax's question from right behind her startles her and has her looking back at him over her shoulder, only to realize he's much closer than he'd been a second ago.

She nods, willing herself to relax again. "I'm fine. You?"

He nods his head as well. "Never better." But barely a second later he smirks at her playfully. "Actually, that's a lie, I was feeling more than better during those seven minutes in heaven with you."

Tara shakes her head at his teasing, a slight blush showing again high on her cheeks when Jax juts his chin towards the two-seater. "Let's sit, I've got something for you."

She raises both her eyebrows in question back at him, giving him a playful look of her own, but before she can actually say anything, Jax beats her to it. "And no, what I wanna show you is not in my pants." By the little chuckle that escapes her lips, it's clear that she got the obvious reference he'd just made to what she'd said to him during their date last night at the drive-in.

This banter, this easy way of talking and getting what the other one is saying, it's downright refreshing, and to his own surprise he realizes just how fucking much he looks forward to keep verbally sparring with her.

Her amusement at his joke has broken the brief tension again, and he can see her visibly relax right before his eyes when she's making herself comfortable on the couch right next to him.

She curiously watches him fish for something in the inside pocket of his leather jacket, half expecting to be presented with yet another joint, but then meets his eyes in shock when he's holding a rectangular jewelry box out to her, and the sweetest of smiles is splitting his face in half when he says. "Happy birthday, babe."

"You really didn't need to get me anything." She says almost like on reflex, but she does really mean it too. He won't hear of it though and there is no stopping him from practically shoving the gift into her hands, leaving her no choice but to take it from him and accept it. When she flips the lid open under his watchful gaze, her eyes immediately widen in even more surprise, taking in the expensive-looking silver necklace with the crescent moon shaped pendant attached to the chain. "Wow, Jax. It's ... it's so pretty."

His smile is growing wider the longer he watches her marvel over the necklace, clearly elated that she seems to like the gift he's picked out for her, but then he can't help but explain why he's chosen this particular one, pointing at the stars etched into the crescent moon pendant. "When I saw it, it made me think of us, talking and looking at the stars together last night."

"And almost getting arrested." She adds smirking, desperate to add some humor back into this moment, to keep herself from getting choked up by this gesture of his.

"Yeah, that too." And he smirks right back, because how could either one of them ever forget a first date like that. Then he adds, obviously joking. "I looked, but seems like cop car pendants aren't a thing."

"Probably not." She quips back instantly, glad they're able to joke like this about what happened just yesterday, as her gaze returns to the jewelry in her hand.

"You like it though, right?" Even though the look on her face already tells him she does, he can't help but ask out loud, because it is after all truly the first time he's ever bought a girl nice jewelry like this before.

Tara nods and smiles brightly back at him, before she can't hold back any longer and leans in to wrap her arms around his neck in a quick hug. "I love it. Thank you."

She eagerly tugs the necklace free from the box, holding it out to him. "Will you put it on me, please?"

Jax quickly takes it from her, and while she's holding her long hair up and out of the way, he's draping it around her delicate neck and quickly clasping it shut in the back.

She runs a hand over the pendant resting above her sternum, looking back at him expectantly now when she asks. "How does it look?"

"You look perfect, babe." He replies, that same sweet and genuine smile on his face again as before.

And it's all he has to say before she reaches out to cup his face and press her lips to his. An electric spark igniting again, pulsing between them when they bridge the gap and tumble to the couch wrapped up around one another in a heady kiss.

X

Their hot and heavy make-out session had been rudely interrupted when another couple stumbled into the room unannounced, but it had been the proverbial bucket of cold water Tara had clearly needed to get a hold of herself, especially now that there'd be more rumors making the rounds if they didn't show their faces around the rest of the party again.

And it's like Jax could read her mind, because despite feeling like he wanted to spend the rest of his life alone with her just hidden away someplace and keep kissing her like the world might end tomorrow, he'd asked her if she was ready to join their friends at the party again instead.

So they took their sweet time, making sure to be seen, hand in hand roaming the rest of the house together for a while, and that's how they've ended up here now, waiting in line in the kitchen to get another drink, right along with their friends, who've all finally emerged from the basement as well.

The music is still somewhat loud, but it's turned down just enough that you can almost talk without shouting. Jax and Opie have their heads turned towards each other in conversation, with Opie teasing his best friend about what did or didn't go down between Tara and him after the two of them left the basement. But Jax just grins whilst shaking his head, letting Opie know he's not gonna _kiss and tell_ , before glancing over to Tara, whose attention is temporarily on her own friends, busy showing off her new necklace to Rayna and Cass, who both seem to be impressed by his choice of a birthday gift for her as well.

Moments later Jax lets go of her hand to step up to the keg, grabbing two plastic cups from the clean stack and starts filling them, and with his attention momentarily turned away, Opie leans into Tara to shout whisper in her ear. "Had to drive him around all afternoon so he could get you that." Glancing down at her necklace for just a split second, then adds. "It's the real deal too, won't turn your neck green after a shower."

Opie's not one for small talk, at all, so Tara pulls back to meet his eyes in obvious surprise, and in doing so is greeted with a smirk from him a heartbeat later, and his joyful facial expression is telling her way more than his words ever would, making it clear to her that he approves of her dating his best friend. And even though she'd already figured as much, it's still good to know that both his and her friends seem to approve of what's going on, and are on their side, it certainly helps to not let her nerves get the best of her, whenever she still feels someone's curious eyes on them every now and then.

Opie brings her back out of her thoughts when he glances down towards her necklace then up to meet her eyes again, making it clear he's still talking about the gift from Jax when he asks. "You like it?"

Tara's hand instinctively reaches up to run her fingers over the pendant once again, nodding back up at him at the same time with a smirk of her own now. "I love it."

"Good." Opie nods pleased, then both their attention shifts back to Jax when he joins them again, handing Tara her drink, while Opie steps around him and up to the keg now to get his own.

Jax simply curls his arm around Tara's neck, tugging her closer to him, before they lean back against the kitchen counter, sipping on their beers, all the while waiting for all their friends to get their drinks too.

They try to talk, but it's just too damn loud to even try to carry on a real conversation, which isn't necessarily a bad thing considering all they've done is talk and make-out, so a little wordless companionship won't hurt, and it allows them both to get a little lost in their own thoughts to try and process everything that has happened so far.

But then Tara notices a couple of guys, that she instantly recognizes from the Lodi football team, huddled in a group on the opposite side of the kitchen. They're downing shots after shots, acting very obnoxious while doing so, and one after the other has started to glance her way, before talking and laughing among themselves. She vaguely remembers their names, but one, in particular, stands out, Braden Trevor, who's shamelessly flirted with her once in front of Logan, clearly just to piss him off right before a Friday night game. With that thought in mind, Tara forces herself to look away, trying to let it slide off of her back and not let whatever they're clearly gossiping about her ruin her night.

She glances up at Jax beside her to focus on all the good that has happened tonight, but that's when she realizes that he has noticed the looks they've been giving her as well. It's obvious because his face that's been mostly smiles and smirks all night is suddenly looking angry and sharp, and before Tara can stop him from doing so, he's already gaining everyone's attention when he's shouting across the room. "What the fuck's so funny?"

The group of jocks bursts out laughing, talking to each other again, clearly not intimidated by his angry scowl directed at them, and Tara's stomach sinks instantly, her nerves roaring to new heights, but for entirely different reasons now than most of the evening. What she fears is about to happen, is something she's put rather high up there on the cons side of those pros-and-cons-lists she's made about the handsome, but pissed off, boy standing right next to her.

Jackson Teller likes to fight. He'll fight with his friends for fun on occasion, for sport, so to speak, but more times than not, he'll end up in a real fight after a few choice words coupled with a few too many drinks. He's got a short fuse, it's no secret either, everyone knows it, and yet there always seems to be some dumbass that wants to provoke him anyways, thinking they can take him on. _Boys will be boys, and drunk boys have proven to be the worst!_

"I said, what the fuck is so funny?" Jax roars even louder now, uncurling his arm from around her and stepping further into the room.

Everyone's attention instantly shifts to the guys and Jax, and even though the music is still blaring, leaving the rest of the party oblivious to what's happening in here, somehow a small crowd has formed in the doorway already, everyone eager to see what's about to go down.

Tara stands frozen in place where Jax left her, clutching her drink in both hands, her heart beating out of her chest, and her eyes nervously flitting around the room, from them to Jax, to Opie, who's stepped up next to him, and the rest of their friends, just to land back on Jax again.

What is she supposed to do here? As his girlfriend, is she supposed to try to stop him? Or back him up? She suddenly regrets that she usually stepped away whenever one of these fights broke out in the past, not wanting to watch something like this, not wanting to watch Jax get hurt, but if she had, she would maybe at least have an idea how Jax's ex handled this sort of thing and wouldn't feel so utterly clueless and out of her element at the moment, as much as she hates to even admit that to herself.

But if she thinks to feel this confused and nervous has her on edge, things suddenly spiral from bad to worse when Braden Trevor breaks away from the huddled group and steps towards Jax with a shit-eating-grin splitting his face in half. He's not a small guy, he's tall and muscular, and if the look on his face is any indication, he's not scared to go toe to toe with Jax either. That becomes even more clear when he glances back over his shoulder at his buddies who've stepped up right behind him now in a show of solidarity, and with that grin still firmly in place says. "We're just curious how that all went down?"

"How what went down?" Jax bites back, gritting his teeth, knowing full well he just took their bait.

The guys laugh again, spurring him on when Braden's eyes cut to Tara across the room, then stop on Opie for just a split second, before he focuses back on Jax right in front of him. "Like, did you each get your own turn, or did Winston and you cross swords like a bunch of faggots while tag-teaming her?"

Tara's mouth gapes open in shock, along with some of the other people standing around, the little chatter that was still going on here and there comes to a screeching halt too, and if it wasn't for the music still playing, you'd have probably been able to hear a pin drop.

"What the fuck did you just say?" Opie practically growls at Braden in the same breath that Jax is lunging at him.

Fists are already flying, a few body shots land, but nobody's actually got a good hit in just yet. They're just tumbling around in an uncoordinated violent fury, people rushing out of their way as they're knocking into shit, into the table and chairs and kitchen counter, empty beer cans and other things clattering to the ground in the process.

That's when Max suddenly fights his way into the kitchen, shouting at them, trying to put a stop to it, and finally gets the other guys to jump in and help him. Lowell, Ope, Ben, and Tino are dragging Jax away, and Braden's guys wrestle him under control, while either boy argues their displeasure, still seeing red and wanting to go on fighting.

"Look, everyone knows I've got no problem with a good brawl, guys." Max clarifies, sounding a lot calmer again, glad that nothing in his home has been seriously damaged yet. "But c'mon, take it outside, 'cause I ain't cleanin' this shit up."

"Let's go," Jax shouts in the direction of Braden, angrily shrugging out of the hold his friends have on him, before shrugging out of his jacket too, shoving it carelessly into Lowell's hands.

Despite that same cocky grin popping back on Braden's face, the raging fury in Jax's eyes has him hesitating for just a second, but to his misfortune Jax's seen it too and can not call him out on it. "What, you scared now? C'mon, let's finish this, you fuckin' pussy."

And then everything is happening too fast that Tara doesn't even have time to think. Everyone's just rushing out of the kitchen and out the back door in a blur of bodies, with Jax and Braden and the other guys up ahead of the crowd, and Tara lost someplace in the back, getting tugged along by Joe and Rayna flanking her on either side, weaving their way through to get a front-row seat to the spectacle that's about to unfold.

She finds herself glancing at her friends, debating if she should ask Ray or Joe to pinch her, because this whole night seems to be turning more surreal with every passing second. Here she was, on her sixteenth birthday, letting everyone in on the fact that Jax and her are officially dating, then Braden Trevor just insulted her for everyone to hear, and now Jax is out for blood in defense of her, and to top it all off she's realizing that people are literally stepping out of the way for her to let her through, like some scene right out of the bible, when the Red Sea parted for Moses.

By the time Tara and her friends find their way to the front, both boys have already shrugged out of their t-shirts, and out of nowhere some girl she doesn't even know steps up to her, muttering "Here" as she shoves Jax's shirt and leather jacket into Tara's arms, then turns and disappears again, blending in with the rest of the spectators all around. _Twilight zone type shit!_

Unlike before in the kitchen when Jax had just thrown himself at Braden, they're both still on their feet now, circling around each other with raised fists as if this was an actual boxing match, except that neither is wearing gloves or a mouth guard, and there aren't any rules to abide by either, as far as she knows.

The noises and voices of everyone around her, including her own friends, seem to fade away, and all she can hear is Jax himself, right along with the pulsing of her own heart. Most of the girls are looking on with unsure expressions, and most guys seem to cheer, ready for a show, but Tara just watches on with bated breath, clutching Jax's possessions to her chest to quiet the pounding of her erratically beating heart. How the hell did they end up here? Suddenly staying hidden away in the office didn't sound so bad anymore.

Her eyes focus in on Jax, he is the kind of tough she so desperately wants to be. He just does what he wants to do, and he doesn't apologize for it, that much is clear. If only her own fearlessness wasn't an act. If only she could be truly brave like Jackson Teller.

Jax is repeatedly raising his fists up in a taunting gesture, baiting Braden to come at him, and he tries a few times, but so far Jax has dodged every punch Braden has thrown, which Jax pointedly punctuates with a well-timed chuckle and it seems to piss Braden off more and more with each missed hit.

Then, suddenly, when Jax tries to dodge yet another blow, he's not fast enough and somehow Braden actually manages to make contact for the first time. Not even close to being a knockout or do any real damage, but enough to cause a small split in the corner of Jax's lips, and surprise the hell out of him too, and has him spitting blood for a second.

But what follows next almost seems like it had been a calculated move from Jax after all, because, in the blink of an eye in which Braden smirks cockily at his friends in the crowd, Jax leaps forward, putting all his weight behind his punches, and starts to deliver blow after blow after blow.

Time seems to move in slow motion while Jax continues to strike Braden's face, the other guy not once getting another hit in, instead just trying to block his own face from taking a beating. He's doing a shit job at that too though, because a crunching sound can be heard, that can only be described as gross and has several people wincing, leaving no doubt that Jax just broke Braden's nose. He tumbles to the grass in a bloodied mess, embarrassed, but not stupid enough to try to get up, so he just stays there, clutching his face, and with it seems to signal the end of the fight and Jax as the victor.

Braden's friends rush towards him, checking on him, while Jax raises his arms up in triumph, bathing in the cheers that erupt all around, mostly folks from Charming, but then he suddenly scans the surrounding crowd, his eyes narrowing and Tara instinctively knows he's looking for her, and it has her finally releasing the breath she'd been holding.

Tara could swear her heart skips a beat when their eyes finally connect. Never in a million years could she have anticipated to end up in this moment, and that instead of feeling repulsed by what had just gone down, she's shocked to realize that Jax fighting for her honor is doing the weirdest fucking things to her insides instead. Apparently Jackson Teller pushes buttons she didn't even know she had, and she finds herself mesmerized and spellbound by this statue of a guy, glistening in sweat, and already stepping towards her while calling her name. "Tara, c'mere."

Jax reaches her with a few quick strides, reaching out for her hand, tugging her out of the midst of her friends and further into the ring so to speak, and with it into everyone's line of view too. She follows along with him leading the way, her eyes on him the whole time, too awestruck and honestly too speechless at the moment to react in any other way.

But Jax brings her out of her stupor when he quickly pulls her in front of a still bleeding Braden, who has just gotten up to walk away, drawing his attention back to them when Jax demands out loud. "Hey, dickhead, you owe my girlfriend an apology." Tara can't help but glance up at him when the word _girlfriend_ has slipped past his lips, because it is the first time he's openly called her that, and it's surely a moment she'll never forget.

"Fuck you, Teller," Braden growls back, trying to sidestep around them again.

But Jax blocks his way once more, tugging Tara securely to his side now, and has both Opie and Lowell stepping up behind them as well. His eyes are glinting dangerously back at Braden, gritting his teeth when he orders him again. "Apologize right fucking now, or I swear I'll break more than just your face."

Braden looks away, meeting his friends' eyes, surely contemplating his options, but to Tara's obvious surprise he meets her eyes at last and mutters under his breath. "Sorry."

Clearly not satisfied with that shitty excuse of an apology, Jax looks like he's ready to snap Braden's neck. But it's in that moment that Tara seems to gather all her courage and makes a move of her own, reaching up and gliding her fingers along Jax's stubbly jawline to draw his attention to her instead. He glances down at her, meeting her eyes in question, and even though her voice is rather quiet, it still somehow comes off strong when she says. "It's okay, he's not worth wasting any more time on."

Jax lets her words sink in before he nods contently at her, then his eyes drift back to Braden with a look of disdain, spitting at the ground right in front of him before he allows Braden and his posse to finally walk away.

Tara sighs in relief, glad that this is finally over, noticing the crowd that had gathered is beginning to disperse all around them too, thinking how she'd like to do the same, but then to her horror, Jax seems to have other ideas.

Within seconds he's hopped up onto the patio table, standing there in all of his still shirtless sweaty glory, and as predicted has already managed to draw everyone's attention right back to him. Tara can only thank her lucky stars that he hasn't pulled her up there with him, but at the same time her heart's accelerating again at what her boyfriend might be up to now.

He doesn't leave her or anyone else wondering for long though when he's clapping his hands at the off chance someone hasn't noticed him just yet. "Look, I'm only going to say this once, so all you motherfuckers better listen up. If I find out you're talking shit about Tara, about my girlfriend, I'll beat your fucking asses, your own mother won't recognize you, got it?"

Tara's not just surprised by his words, but also by the claps and shouts of approval that erupts around them too.

But Jax puts a stop to that when he adds. "Hold up, I'm not finished. As for all the chicks who think you're off the hook 'cause I'd never lay a hand on any of you, you're right. I won't touch you, instead, I will kick your boyfriend's ass in your place, or your brother's, your cousin's, your best friend, hell, I'll beat the snot out of the guy you've been crushing on since before you grew tits and I'll make damn fucking sure he knows why I'm doing it too. You got me?"

He hops down from the table, landing on his feet right in front of her, and she's blushing and smiling, yet feeling so flustered, she doesn't know what to do other than shake her head at him for a long moment, before she finally steps into him to whisper under her breath. "I can't believe you just did that."

"The fight or the speech?" He wonders out loud.

"Both, I guess." Tara quips back.

"Had to be done." Jax just shrugs as if to say _'it's no big deal'_ , and reaches for his shirt still draped over her arm. She watches him pull it back on, holding his jacket out to him next, and he quickly slips it on too.

Jax grins then, stepping into her and cupping her cheek to angle her face up to kiss her. Their lips a mere breath apart when a slow clap starts somewhere beside them and has them both pulling back to see who's behind it.

To their surprise it's Opie, and he's sporting a downright wicked grin when he steps even closer, right along with the rest of their friends. "Fuck me." He suddenly blurts out, his eyes on Jax when he adds. "My best friend has finally fallen."

 _Fallen? Fallen where?_ Tara wonders, not understanding what Opie's getting at, her eyes bouncing perplexed back and forth between Jax and him for a second, while the little snickers of the other's probably should've glued her in, but instead they're barely registering with her.

"Don't start, Ope," Jax warns in reply, he's not ready to talk the L-word just yet and it has him suddenly fidgeting with his pack of smokes, lighting up and looking down at his feet a little unsure, his whole posture such a stark contradiction now to the guy that had just stood up there on that table and dished out threats for all to hear.

"Just callin' it like I see it." Opie fires back, a smirk curving his lips upward still when he joins Jax by pulling out his own pack of cigarettes and quickly lights up too, but then the subject's dropped again and instead they start talking about the fight that had just taken place, much to Jax's relief.

Jax wraps an arm around Tara's waist, tugging her closer to him again, pressing a kiss against her hair between drags from his cigarette and trading words with the rest of the guys, who are all chiming in now about the way Jax had pummeled Braden to the ground.

Meanwhile, Tara finds herself practically melting against him, because in his strong arms like this, all her troubles are momentarily forgotten. That is until she opens her eyes again and catches the pointed look both Rayna and Cassidy are practically shooting at her, clearly with something on their minds that they want to share, but for some reason seem to think they can't do so at the moment.

"What?" Tara silently mouths the word, knowing that Jax's focusing the other way, and even if he wasn't, he couldn't see with the way she's got her head angled down.

Ray glances over at Cass for just a second, before they're turning their eyes back to her and both mouth back simultaneously, careful to form their lips around each word so she'll _hear_ them, even though neither one is making an actual sound. "He. Is. Falling. For. You."

"No. You're crazy." She mouths instantly, wanting to shake her head, but doesn't because she knows it'll draw his attention back to her.

Cass and Ray just nod at her, rather enthusiastically, when she dares another glance their way, and it's then that she suddenly takes the time to think back to Opie's cryptic words from a few minutes ago, and can hear them replaying in her head. Is that what Opie was hinting at? Does he really think that Jax is falling for her?

Tara's tilting her neck up to look at Jax, as if by looking at him she could confirm it somehow, and the adoration she sees in his eyes when he glances back at her, suddenly has her knees go weak yet again. Her heart is picking up its pace again at the mere thought that what Opie said could be true. She knows she's already falling for him, but knowing he's also already feeling the same certainly adds a whole other level to that feeling.

She tries to relax against him, tries just to keep her eyes focused on what is happening in front of her, tries to focus on the guys' conversation. But there is no use, because instead, her brain is keeping Opie's words on a loop, right along with Jax's response too. And it leaves Tara with no doubt, that even though he might be feeling it, he wasn't ready to share that with her just yet any more than she was ready to tell him she was falling for him too.

But still, this revelation has her emotions all over the place, and has her feeling a high she's never experienced before in her life. And honestly it's not just Opie's words, but everything - literally everything - that's been leading up to this, like the unusual way Jax came into her life, at her most vulnerable time, and the feelings that developed from it when she'd least expected.

Somehow, in the midst of real fear and self-doubt, Jackson Teller came in and has swept her away in a whirlwind, with his natural good looks, his charm, but also with his goodness, and now after only a couple of weeks, she's in so deep that she can't even see the top anymore.

To give her heart to him might seem reckless, at least her head still tells her so on occasion, and maybe it's the most reckless thing she's ever done or ever will do, but the fact of the matter is that he brightens her entire world somehow simply by being in it, and as she glances up at him again she makes a silent vow to try to figure out how to do the same for him.

X

Author's Note: Lots is going on in this chapter, and I'm curious to hear your reactions. So if you've got a minute to spare, leave me a few words please? Thanks for still reading.


	18. Look at you, babe, showing your teeth!

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

X

"Look, I'm fine, babe." Jax flexes his fingers repeatedly in front of him, to demonstrate that his wounds aren't bad and that his knuckles aren't still bleeding, after he has washed the blood and grime off in the kitchen sink already.

But Tara ignores his protest, quickly ushers Jax inside, closes the bathroom door behind them, and makes sure to lock it before she spins back around towards him at once.

She eyes him cautiously for a brief moment, and even though this is all her own doing, her heart's suddenly beating wildly in her chest at the thought of being in this small space behind a locked door with him, with all the unspoken possibilities that could happen in here. And the way he is towering over her and looking at her right this very second, certainly isn't easing her thoughts or her quickening pulse either.

Over the span of the last couple of hours, Jax has asked her to ' _go steady'_ , kissed her breathless in a basement closet, got her a beautiful and thoughtful birthday present, fought some asshole who'd openly disrespected her, then threatened anyone with the same treatment if they continued talking trash about her, and last but not least there was Opie's revelation that he thinks his best friend has fallen for her.

All in all it's a lot to take in!

And all these revelations from tonight are surely making those butterflies in her stomach go haywire and her thoughts a muddled mess, and because of that it takes all the willpower she can muster to not launch herself at him right now. Instead she remains rooted to her spot, takes a deep, mind-clearing breath to snap herself out of it, mentally patting herself on the back that she's barely had anything to drink after leaving the basement with him earlier, and focuses all her attention back on the real reason why they've come in here.

"Sit." She snaps with a bit of a sharp edge to her voice, but it's all just a front to cover up how she's really feeling, because letting him in on the secret, that she wouldn't mind it one bit if he stepped closer, pressed her up against this door and continued what he'd started earlier, just sounds like a very, very bad idea. Sure, it would be so, so hot and exhilarating, but it's truly not how she's ever envisioned losing her virginity, although ... she has certainly thought of Jax being _the one_ she'd be losing it to. _No, no, no, don't go there, ... keep your mind out of the gutter, Knowles!_

"Yes, ma'am," Jax replies, startling her out of her thoughts, but his amused expression and his raised eyebrows clue her in that he seems surprised, yet also intrigued, by her being the one ordering him around like she just did. Let's face it, apart from his mother, females usually do not order Jackson Teller around, but then again, he should've been used to the fact by now that Tara Knowles isn't anything like those other girls, and she's already proven that to him more than once!

He quickly looks around the small room before deciding to take a seat on the edge of the bathtub, watching her as she turns away and rifles through the cabinets, to find what she needs to better clean out the cuts on his hands.

With her back turned to him, his eyes slowly rake over her body, over all of her captivating curves that are barely contained in those short denim shorts and her too thin black top she's wearing. The dirty thoughts that are stirred up in his mind at the sight of her, have him suddenly living through a moment of déjà vu, and it has him shake his head and swipe his hand over his face in a vain attempt to control his mischievous grin from growing any wider.

"What's so funny?" Tara asks when she turns her attention back to him, her voice and eyes filled with a hint of humor this time when she takes in the smirk he's trying to suppress.

Jax eyes the alcohol-drenched cotton square ready in her hand as she steps closer, before his gaze travels back to her face. "Nothing." He quips back, shaking his head at her, not wanting to come on too strong yet again, and showing all of his cards at once as he had with his speech a little while ago, which ended with Opie calling him out right in front of her. _Dick move, bro!_

It's one thing to internally battle and try to make sense of what he's feeling about the girl right in front of him, but it's a whole other thing being put on the spot to already put a name to those feelings out loud. _It's way too soon for all of that, Teller! Way, way too soon!_

Tara raises her eyebrows at him and gives him a _n 'I don't believe you_ ' look, but before he can say anything else, she's already cupping his stubbly chin without preamble, holding his face in place and begins to carefully dab at the dried blood at the corner of his lips.

He tries not to flinch at the sting from the alcohol, instead, he focuses on her pretty face, because here in the rather harsh lighting of the bathroom, he can take in every little nuance he wasn't able to see in the barely lit backyard or the dimmer lighting of the rest of the house.

She throws the dirty, used square into the little trash bin behind her, then reaches for another one on the counter, quickly dousing it with the rubbing alcohol she's found and this time reaches for one of his hands to begin cleaning up his cuts there now. Her gentle touch is sending tingles down his spine, and quite frankly straight to his dick too, but he's trying his best not to think about that right now.

He's fascinated by the way she takes her sweet time taking care of him, feels amused by the two vertical little lines forming right between her scrunched eyebrows, contorting her pretty face as she concentrates on her task of meticulously cleaning his knuckles in unusual comfortable silence.

But then, suddenly, their eyes meet again, and neither can hide the carefree and genuine smile that forms on either of their faces, and it's also then that Jax gives in and decides to confess parts of his earlier thoughts. "It was déjà vu."

"What?" Halting her hands for the split second she's meeting his eyes in confusion.

"You know, that feeling you get, like you've been somewhere before, or done something -."

"I know what déjà vu means, Jax." She interrupts him, smiling again, yet rolling her eyes at the same time. _Duh!_

 _Of course she knows what it means_ , and he bites his lip to keep from laughing out loud at the expression on her face when she just rolled her eyes at him. "I was smiling because I've had a moment of déjà vu." He starts explaining, grinning wider as he gestures around the room, to himself and then to her with his free hand. "You and me in a bathroom, my knuckles bloody from a fight, and you playing my nurse."

Tara's contemplative smile is instant, despite the looming darker memories from the night he's obviously referring to, and she stops what she's doing when she meets his eyes again and nods. "Yeah, I guess this does feel familiar."

She reaches for his other hand to begin cleaning it too, avoiding his eyes now when more memories from that night surface in her head, most of them not good at all. Oddly enough, she muses, that night they'd also spent some time huddled in a coat closet together with their hearts beating wildly, yet for so very different reasons than tonight.

She doesn't like where her thoughts are taking her, so in a way to divert yet again, she instead voices the question out loud she's been secretly wondering about him for years now. "So, ... why do you fight like that anyway?"

Jax's eyes on her are sharp, instantly defensive, and he quirks just one eyebrow at her in an almost comical way when he regards her and quickly shoots back. "I was defending you!" _Both times,_ but even though he doesn't add those last two words, he knows that she knows they're very much implied.

Tara hurriedly swallows the lump in her throat away, when she's momentarily brought back in time to the crippling fear she felt as she had to helplessly stand by and watch Jax fight Michael Dunley in her living room. She frowns now and shakes her head at him, as if she can also shake the memories away right along with it. "I'm not talking about that night, ... or tonight for that matter." She clarifies, before she meets his eyes straight on and says. "I'm talking about all those other times. You seem to get into fights just ... just for the hell of it."

"I always have my reasons, Tara." He says, still sounding much more defensive than he means to, but he just can't help it at the moment, because she's caught him off guard with this unexpected question into his psyche. "It's never just for the hell of it." He says and tells himself that it's only partially a lie, because it's true that he's always quick to come up with some arbitrary reason when he finds his next victim and does what he does best.

Well, that is what he tells the people around him, it's what he tells his friends, because it's easier to justify his ill-temper and flying fists by saying someone provoked him one way or another, than to actually admit the ugly truth out loud, which is that a lot of the time he is just plain angry.

Angry that his baby brother was sick for most of his short life, and then died before he even had a chance to become a real fleshed-out person.

Angry that his father died too young, and he'll never get a chance to sit at the reaper table with him.

Angry that his mother moved on way too quick for his liking, and that she did so with Clay of all people.

And angry at himself for his conflicting thoughts about the club, on one hand feeling so eager and downright impatient to finally be able to join Samcro, but on the other fearing the weight on his shoulders of trying to be able to measure up to his old man and what he stood for.

Let's just say, his anger issues are pretty complex and kind of complicated to explain to anyone, let alone an outsider like her, a good girl who didn't grow up in the life and couldn't possibly grasp all the shit he's already seen and lived through in his young life.

So obviously Jax can't even entertain the idea of telling Tara any of that for many reasons, ... this shit is heavy, his issues ... they're too deep, and with him and her literally just starting out, just getting to know each other, it's way too soon to allow her to see this troubled side of him, because he can't stand the thought of her looking at him differently if she knew the real him, which he's sure she undoubtedly would.

Besides, how could he possibly justify opening up to a girl he's been dating for barely a minute when he's never even told Ope about what's at the root of his anger issues? But then again, he's fairly sure his best friend might just be the only one that knows and can read him well enough to already know what's really going on with him. Even if neither of them has ever actually said a word about it out loud, but yeah, ... he's sure Ope knows.

She's done tending to his hands, busies herself with throwing the trash away and putting everything back where she's found it, all while feeling his eyes following her every move and burning holes in her back now.

"What about you?" He wonders out loud then, deflecting back to her, and scrutinizing her with his gaze much like she'd done to him a moment ago. _Surely she's angry too!_

"What about me?" She throws the question right back at him, spinning around, leaning against the sink, her hands braced on the edge of the counter on either side of her, trying her best to appear casual even though she no longer feels that way at all. Unlike their countless little other talks that seem to have come so easy and natural, this feels slightly awkward and tense now, and she blames herself for starting this apparently unwelcome subject.

Jax stands now too, crossing his arms in front of himself, but then leans back against the wall right across from her, his eyes trained on hers in a challenge when he elaborates what he means. "I know for a fact that people talking shit has hurt you, but ... I mean, doesn't it ever make you wanna punch someone? Doesn't it piss you off?"

"Of course it pisses me off." Tara blurts back without having to think about it, because it's such a no-brainer.

"Well, what do you do when you're pissed off?" He asks, although he's pretty sure he already knows the answer to that question. His mind instantly goes back to earlier tonight, when, during their spin the bottle game, her ex-best friend Emma had flirted shamelessly with him to get him to join her in the closet. Tara had obviously been hurt and angry then, it had been written all over her face, but somehow she had kept her mouth shut and hadn't even said a single word to voice that anger out loud.

"Nothing." She answers on a sigh just like he'd just predicted, then shakes her head at him, truly perplexed by such an odd question, but also feels the need to explain. "Despite what you might think, just because I'm not throwing my fists around at every opportunity, doesn't make me a pushover." And then she remembers sitting on her front porch with him, and his suggestion from that night not too long ago. "Besides, wasn't it you who said I shouldn't let that stuff get to me? That I should just let it 'roll off my back', remember?"

"Yeah, but look, there's a difference between hearing shit through the grapevine and not knowing who's truly behind it, versus someone doing or saying something straight to your face. Sometimes you gotta show your teeth, babe." Jax points out to her, sounding almost patronizing, but before Tara can think of what to say in response, he's already asking his next question, disbelieve heavy in his voice. "So you've never clocked someone? Ever?"

"No, I haven't." She replies sounding truly surprised by his question, then suddenly wonders if the one time she kicked Dunley between the legs in self-defense would count, but quickly decides for herself that it doesn't.

"Never hit 'em with a brick?" Jax's face's shows just the trace of a smile now, feeling oddly relieved to take this conversation in a different direction. Away from him and his more deep-rooted issues he has no intention of discussing with her.

"Jesus, no." She sounds outraged at the mere suggestion, and yet she can't help her own little smile from showing on her face at the way he's looking at her now, because he can't possibly be serious. _Right?_ He's teasing her, he's got to be, _bad-boy_ or not, there's no way she'd believe that he has actually beaten someone with a brick.

"Well, babe, you have not lived until you've heard the bones of your enemy getting crushed." He replies, and despite the hint of a smile on his lips, he's sounding way too damn earnest and she's not sure what to make of it.

Tara meets his eyes, imploring, but admits out loud. "I can't tell if you're kidding or not."

"Yeah. Neither can I anymore." He admits himself without actually explaining anything further though, and instead just shakes his head back at her. And then he's suddenly smiling a little more as he steps towards her, taking her by surprise when his hands are framing her face now, with his thumbs gently stroking over her instantly pink cheeks. The gesture is downright sweet and in complete contradiction to the current subject matter, and his face grows serious again. "I just mean, even now, I'm still fuckin' mad as hell when I think about what that fucker said about you, and I ... I guess I want everyone else to know it too."

"Well, I think it's safe to say everyone knows how you feel." She tries hard to contain her shy smile as she remembers the speech he'd made in her defense not too long ago.

"Right. I guess that's true." He easily agrees again, and then they just stand there like this, staring at each other for a few long quiet filled minutes, his hands still cupping the sides of her face, and her hands clasped around his wrists, holding him there to relish in his gentle touch, but also to steady herself, because being near him still makes her dizzy. And _God_ , if he were to kiss her now, in here behind a locked door, there's no telling where that kiss might lead.

So when the threat of his impending kiss seems to become too much for her to handle, she interrupts their little intimate moment the best way she knows how, - with a grin and the playful banter that has already become their secret language with each other. "You wanna know what I think, Teller?"

Intrigue shines in his eyes, when he teases her right back calling her by her last name. "What's that, Knowles?"

She's still holding his gaze when she answers him, not even trying to conceal the humor in her voice as she explains. "Well, I think that you're sweet and charming and by your own admission ' _not a player_ ', and if it wasn't for your occasional fighting, you'd totally lose your bad-boy status. So I think that that is the real reason why you fight, because you like being bad. You like being thought of as bad."

"Hmm." He hums as if he's truly thinking it over, but then cracks a smile at her that makes her knees weak. "You think you've got me all figured out, don't you?"

Tara doesn't actually answer him and just chuckles in response, because quite honestly Jax is still a bit of a mystery to her. Sure, most of the time he's so easy to talk to, and they've had long and carefree discussions in which she's confided her recent struggles and fears to him. But looking back now, she realizes that the things he's shared about himself in return were mostly of the superficial variety. For example, she knows what he likes to eat and drink, what kind of music or movies, or even what kind of cigarettes he likes. She even knows his favorite authors and books and quotes. And yeah, they've very briefly discussed the odd coincidence that both of them have lost a parent due to an accident, but neither of them had been ready to dwell too deeply on that particular subject. So if she really thinks about it, the answer to his question is a resounding 'no', because she doesn't have him figured out at all. Far from it, in fact.

What she does know though, is that Jax is clearly a thrill-seeker, and she certainly is not. He seems like the type of guy that doesn't mind drawing attention to himself, and maybe he's even seeking it, while she usually tries to actively avoid it. And maybe knowing those few things about him should be enough to scare her out of this relationship with him, but strangely it doesn't, because somehow they fit. Somehow, someway, Jax and her just fit.

It barely makes any sense, it's hardly logical at all, and it doesn't negate the fact that when he started to argue with that guy in the kitchen, she felt so scared and out of her element and at a loss of what to do, yet she's still here. Because when he looks at her like this, like he is doing right now, so full of surety, none of that other stuff seems to matter much.

When he holds her close, when he kisses her, everything else falls away and he's all she can see and feel and hear. She swears being in his arms, it's like what she imagines being in the eye of a hurricane must feel like, for a moment in time it's the most peaceful place in the world, leaving either of them completely oblivious to the violent chaos that's possibly surrounding them.

There's a sudden loud and rather insistent knock on the bathroom door that draws them both back to the here and now, and without further discussion they both file out of the room, hand in hand, to finally join their friends at the party again.

X

Tara has convinced him to dance, so that is where they've spent the most part of the last half hour, in the middle of the dance floor right alongside countless other couples, and doing their best to ignore the curious stares they still seem to get from a few people here and there.

But when the upbeat music suddenly shifts to Sinead O'Connor's _'Nothing compares to you',_ Tara stops dancing and takes Jax's hand, trying to lead him off of the make-shift dance floor.

But instead of following along with her, Jax tugs on her hand, pulling her right back to him. "Where're you trying to run off to?"

Tara can't help herself from glancing around the room, catching the jealous looks of quite a few girls, before looking back up at him and meeting his questions eyes when she finally answers him by pointing out an observation she's made about him in the past. "You don't slow dance."

His eyebrows shoot up to his hairline at the realization that she must've been watching him as well for her to have noticed and remembered something like that about him, and knowing that makes the smile on his face stretch even wider.

He wraps his hands around her waist, pulling her flush against him, before he begins to slowly sway along to the slow rhythm of the song, and whispers in her ear. "I must've been with the wrong girl."

"Oh, ... wow." Tara gapes at him in disbelief. "You're good, Teller." She adds, teasing and yet scoffing all at the same time, but then finds herself smirking and shaking her head at him in amusement when he winks down at her in reply. She does wrap her arms around his neck in answer though without further prompt from him, and her whole body's vibrating at the implications of his words as she begins swaying to the slow song right along with him.

"So my lines are getting better?" He teases her back, one of his hands splayed across her back to draw her even nearer, the other resting possessively right above her ass at the small of her back.

"Definitely." She nods, her head resting against his shoulder, giggling against the crook of his neck in good fun, but that giggle dies down again, her body stiffens when she once more catches sight of countless eyes watching them like hawks. And it becomes clear that Tara hadn't been the only one that knew about his prior aversion to slow dancing, at least judging by the pissed off looks directed at her again this very moment.

"What's wrong?" Jax asks against her ear, having noticed the sudden change in her posture.

She could lie, could shrug it off, put her fake, brave face back on and pretend she isn't bothered, but it's exhausting and she's simply grown too tired of doing that tonight, at least when talking with him, and so she tells him the truth before he gets a chance to ask a second time. "People are staring at us." But even as the whispered words slip out of her mouth, she thinks that she can't really blame them, because the fact that she's dating Jax still seems a little crazy to her too. So surely they're all wondering what alternate reality they've stumbled upon watching him slow dance with her like this, when everyone knows that Jax Teller doesn't do slow dancing, or the fact that she isn't the kind of girl he usually goes for either. _You don't know that,_ the little voice inside her head chastises her instantly though, when she thinks about the girls she remembers seeing him with, in the past.

Jax lifts his gaze to see for himself what she's talking about, a little ticked off when he's realizing that she's right. He tugs her even tighter against him, making a show of pressing a sweet kiss against her hair, knowing full well that his buddies will tease the shit out of him for the next month or so, but he honestly doesn't care. "They're just staring because ..." His voice drifts off, searching for just the right words, because all he cares about right now is the girl in his arms, about making her feel better, making her feel more comfortable being with him like this, regardless who the fuck is watching them. _Let them all watch!_ "You're my girl now, Knowles. Everybody knows it. There's no going back."

This time she doesn't tease or scoff though, because the sincerity she's heard in his voice makes it clear that he really means it, and that it isn't just another line he might've used on another girl before her.

 _'You're my girl now._ ' His words running on repeat in her head now, elating her, and it seems to be the push that she needs to lose the last of her inhibition, and say _'fuck it'_ to it all, to them all. So without real reason or preamble she shifts back just enough to look up at him, meeting his sincere blue eyes with her hazel-green ones, before leaning up on her tiptoes and pressing her lips to his in a scorching kiss. Right here, out in the open, in the middle of this dance floor and for all the fucking world to see.

She's done hiding what they have from other people, done hiding how she feels from Emma and the other jealous girls just like her. She's falling for him and unless she's been reading him all wrong, then he's falling for her too, so to hell with everyone else.

Her cheeks are flushed when she eventually pulls back from the kiss to catch her breath and to get her equilibrium back again too. But all that goes straight out the window, when she's met with the most dazzling smile from Jax as he's gazing down at her with a mixture of both pride and amusement.

"What?" She wonders out loud what that look he's giving her is all about.

"Look at you, babe, showing your teeth!" He states, his choice of words an obvious reference to their earlier conversation and the way she has just _staked a claim_ on him with this public dance-floor-kiss, right in front of all his other female admirers. _And why the hell is he feeling so stupidly happy that Tara's staking a claim?_ He'd never liked it when Amy had tried to do it!

"Ran fresh out of bricks to throw!" Tara replies casually, shrugging, making Jax laugh out loud in response, and yet she's smirking and feeling a little sheepish that he saw right through her and saw the kiss for what it was. A blatant _'Fuck you'_ to all of those jealous girls that have been giving her the evil eyes all night. _Eat your hearts out girls, he's mine!_

X

Jax is sitting on a lawn chair on the back porch with Tara in his lap, sharing a cigarette with her, his fingers absentmindedly caressing her bare thighs, not even realizing what kind of effect his touch has on her, and she tries her best to not let it show either.

Instead they're both involved in conversations with his and her friends. The current topic of discussion is the mystery girl Opie's been pining after since the night of the party out at Lodi lake. _Donna!_

"You never got her last name?" Lowell asks out loud what everyone else is wondering too.

Opie shakes his head no, taking a drag from his own cigarette, but then his lips stretch into a telling grin when he exhales a moment later to add. "Didn't really do much talkin' that night."

He's rewarded with a bout of approving and suggestive shouts from the guys, while the girls share disbelieving looks and try not to roll their eyes at their chauvinistic behavior.

"I just don't get it." Jax blurts out a moment later, taking a drag as he's looking from his best friend to the rest of their little group. "Somebody's gotta know this chick."

"Maybe she's new and just moved here." Tino wonders out loud, holding his joint out towards the rest of them, wordlessly asking if anybody wants a hit, and Lowell eagerly takes it.

"Naw, that's not it." Opie interrupts, shaking his head, and gaining everyone's attention when he explains. "She said her family moved to Lodi when she was 12."

Everyone's quiet for a moment, either thinking to themselves or simply at a loss of what else to say, when Tara suddenly remembers something. "The Charming library keeps copies of the High school yearbooks -."

"So?" Tino interrupts her before she can say more, shrugging his shoulders dismissively.

All eyes drift back to Tara when she goes on to explain. "Maybe Lodi keeps copies too. If you know what she looks like then -."

"Then I could find out her last name." Opie interrupts, his eyes on Tara while he's finishing her train of thought for her, looking truly hopeful all of a sudden.

"Told you my girl's wicked smart," Jax exclaims with a proud smile, before leaning in to press a quick kiss to her lips.

"If she's so smart, then why the fuck's she with you, Teller?" Lowell pipes up, causing everyone to laugh out loud at his dig at Jax, but then he casts a quick rueful look straight at Tara. "No offense."

"None taken," Tara replies, smirking back as Jax flips Lowell off with both hands.

Opie suddenly stands, tossing his cigarette to the ground to quickly grind it out with the heel of his shoe, and it has Jax wondering out loud. "Whatcha thinkin', bro?"

"Gonna check out the library." He states like it should be obvious.

"It's the middle of the night." Tara points out, and with it implying that it's obviously been long closed already.

"I know," Opie states, but is already feeling for his keys in his pocket. "Just wanna see what time they open tomorrow." He adds, but throws Jax a look that Tara can't quite decipher. "You ready?"

Jax narrows his eyes at him in thought for a second, but then he's nodding back at Opie while also tapping his hand against Tara's hip in a wordless warning that he needs her to get up so that he can get up too. But before she's even got a chance to react, he's already gripping her by the waist, hoists her off of his lap and onto her feet, and then quickly stands himself.

"You're leaving?" Tara can't help but wonder, looking up at him, searching his face and hating the disappointed tone that's so obvious in her voice.

Jax shares another look with Opie, asking his friend out loud. "Are we comin' back, or ... what?"

Opie glances at his wristwatch, then shakes his head. "Probably not. I gotta be at T-M in the morning."

Jax is looking disappointed himself now, although he's nodding his head in understanding. But then Opie's already exchanging handshakes with their friends in goodbye, Jax tells him that he'll meet him at the truck and turns his attention wholeheartedly back to Tara, ushering her off to the side to talk more privately. "Are you working tomorrow?"

"I'm not, actually. You?" Tara replies and asks him in return, sudden hope in her voice that they might get to spend the day together. They could go back to Lodi lake, go for a swim this time, and with that thought, the rest of the summer suddenly doesn't feel so boring anymore if she gets to spend it with him.

"No, I'm not working, but I was gonna work on my bike though." He explains and with it instantly dashing her dreams as quickly as they'd appeared.

"Oh." She can't hide her disappointment from her face or from her voice, but at the same time feels stupid for already feeling so needy when it comes to spending time with him. She's never felt like that with Logan.

However, Jax looks equally disappointed when he bites his lip in thought, his eyes drifting back to the rest of their friends huddled around the porch talking, and noting that Opie's long gone. "Look, why don't you come with us, that way we could hang and talk a little longer, and Ope could drop you at your place on the way?"

Suddenly she feels stupid that she hasn't actually told him yet of Rayna's and her plan to stay out all night, but she quickly remedies that now. "Actually, my dad thinks I'm staying the night with Rayna, and her parents think she's staying the night with me."

He raises his eyebrows at her in surprise that straight-A-student Tara Knowles would so blatantly lie to her old man, but she brings him out of his thoughts when she quickly carries on to explain. "He's still mad that I got drunk, so this was the only way I could come here tonight."

"Really? So, ... where are you staying?" Jax can't help but ask the obvious now that he's privy to her plan.

She shrugs. "I thought we'd just stay here, you know ... together, then head home in the morning. Tino gave us a ride, he was gonna stay too."

"So Rayna could stay with Tino?" He muses out loud, his eyes drifting to both of them for just a second, before he focuses his attention back on her again. "And you could just come home with me?" He suddenly offers, taking her by surprise, and yet his expression is hopeful as he studies her reaction to his invitation. He knows he's undoubtedly pushing his luck to ask something like that of her, considering they've literally just started dating.

"Are your parents out of town again?" She quickly asks in reply, and surprising him yet again that that's the only concern she seems to have with his out of the blue idea.

He doesn't correct her by pointing out that Clay is not really his parent, but instead focuses on what's important when he answers her. "No, they're home ..." He glances at his own watch now. "But they'll be fast asleep when we get there. I promise, babe, they won't even know you're there." He smirks, squeezing her hands as his eyes are silently pleading with her.

Tara bites her lip this time and casts a look back at her own friends who seem lost deep in a discussion at the moment, wishing she could march over there, pull Cassidy and Rayna aside, and ask for their input. Although she's already got a pretty good idea what Rayna would tell her to do. _Go for it, Knowles!_

She can't believe he's really just invited her to stay the night with him. _Jesus Christ, what is she supposed to say to that?_ Especially considering that during the whole time they were dating, she' had not once spent an entire night with Logan. And yet here she is with Jax, already considering doing just that after officially dating him for what? ... A couple of hours!

It seems so crazy to even consider it, and yet it also makes her feel like she did earlier in that closet with him, excited and scared at the same time, and tingly all over, and not to forget dizzy too.

"Hey. I know what you're thinking, but that's not what this is." Jax gently cups her cheek with his hand to draw her focus back to him, then proceeds to make a cross-motion over his heart with the fingers of his other hand. "I promise. I don't like the thought of leaving you here when I'm not around" He stops abruptly and sighs, running one of his hands through his hair in exasperation. "I really want you to stay with me, Tara. We could talk some more, then get some sleep, I swear, that's it, ... nothing more. I promise, babe." But even as he says the words, deep down he's not sure who he's truly trying to convince here; her or himself! Because let's face it, he'd never do anything she isn't comfortable with, but that being said, he's probably not gonna get any real sleep with Tara snuggled up beside him for the first time, in his twin-sized bed.

X

Like Tara had predicted, the library has already been closed for several hours, and yet they're parked a little way up the street from the building itself, and she's left wondering what Opie could have to discuss with Jax right now, that couldn't possibly wait until later. It's just odd how the two of them are standing by the tailgate of the pickup while she remains seated in the truck to give them privacy, after Jax has politely asked her to do so. She's not sure what's going on, but their hushed voices whispering back and forth in the darkness of the night has her nerves on edge and feeling uneasy. She just knows something's up!

But then Jax appears back by her window, pulling the door open and slipping back into the seat beside her, watching Opie walk off on his own, back in the direction of the library, with a flashlight in one hand, and what appears like a crowbar in the other.

"What's going on, Jax? Where's he going?" Tara wonders out loud, looking after the shrinking shadow of their tall teenage friend.

Jax lights another cigarette, then curls his arm around her shoulders to tug her closer to his side again, his eyes scanning their surroundings for a quick second before focusing back on his best friend, who's already off in the distance. "Look, Ope doesn't wanna wait. He's really into this girl, and he just wants to find a name so he can try to find her."

Tara searches his eyes, trying to understand what he's getting at, but she's drawing a blank until he goes on to further elaborate. "It really shouldn't take too long. He'll just grab the last couple yearbooks and we'll get outta here."

"Wait," Tara whispers, but her voice still sounds shocked when she realizes what Opie's up to. "Is he breaking into the library?" _Because of what I said? Oh, fuck, no!_

"Yeah," Jax answers way too casually for her liking, taking a drag from his cigarette as he's glancing down at her to meet her disbelieving eyes. He squeezes her shoulder, and tries to reassure her. "Don't worry, babe. It's all good, I promise. Let's just hope he finds them quick."

X

Opie did what Jax had said he was going to do. He stole the yearbooks from the last couple of years, even though he's sure that Donna's only going to be a Junior, like them, in the fall, and then they quickly drove off to the nearest twenty-four-hour-convenience store, where he parked and all of them began rifling through the pages in search of Opie's mystery girl named Donna.

"That's her. That's Donna." Opie suddenly exclaims, sounding excited, angling the book in Jax and Tara's direction and pointing at the picture of the girl in question. "Lerner. Her name's Donna Lerner."

"She's cute." Jax muses in approval as he takes in the black and white headshot of her, like he hadn't actually met her too at Lodi lake, but then his eyes land back on his friend, shrugging. "So now what?"

X

Jax puts yet another quarter into the slot of the payphone, before Opie hurriedly reads the next phone number out loud for Tara to dial. Just like the countless previous times, it seems to ring forever until someone finally answers the call, and Jax and Opie watch on as she takes a quick, deep breath to go through the same spiel yet again.

She's very polite, but her voice is sounding way too cheery for the late hour, when she rattles out her already rehearsed lines in one long breath. "Hi, it's Donna's friend, Grace Jackson. I'm really sorry to be calling so late, but it's kind of an emergency and I really, really have to speak to Donna right now, so would you please -." She pauses to listen. "I'm sorry, what?" She pauses again, biting her lip. "Oh God, I'm sorry, my bad, I must have dialed the wrong number. So sorry -" She hangs up then, and Opie's already crossing out the name and number of this particular Lerner on the ripped out phonebook page he's clutching in his hand.

So they promptly do it all again, Opie reading off the next number to her and she's quickly dialing it, just to be waiting with bated breath as the line rings over and over again until someone finally picks up. "Hi, it's Donna's friend, Grace Jackson. I'm really sorry to be calling so late, but it's kind of an emergency and I really, really have to speak to Donna right now, so would you please put her on the line?" She pauses to hear their reply, just like all those other times before. "Uh-huh." She nods, her eyes flying up to Opie's, and a smile instantly crosses her face, giving him hope, and Jax tries to lean in to hear what the other person on the line is saying. "Okay, no." Another pause. "I guess. Yeah, ... no, I understand. I'm really sorry that I woke you up, Mrs. Lerner, I'll call back tomorrow when Donna's awake. Okay, bye" She lets out a shrill, ear-piercing shriek even before she's managed to fully hang up the phone, and is practically bouncing up and down in excitement that has the boys shake their heads and chuckle out loud at her.

Opie's grin is infectious, but he's still asking out loud to confirm what he thinks this means, pointing down at the name, address, and the number they'd just dialed on the crumpled piece of paper in his hand. "You sure this is her?"

"Yes." Tara nods frantically, then explains without stopping to breathe. "Her mom was pissed, scolded me for waking her up, and said Donna's been asleep for hours, like I should be, and I'd have to call back tomorrow to talk to her. She was kinda mean about it." She adds, and then wonders out loud. "I mean, I guess there's a chance that there's more than one Donna Lerner in Lodi, ... but really, what are the odds of that?"

"Alright, Ope." Jax chimes in then, slipping his hand in Tara's, before he's clapping his friend on the shoulder with approval and says. "Let's go get your girl."

X

Jax and Tara watch from the cabin of the truck as Opie yet again makes his solitary journey to the house right across the street from where they've parked, but this time Tara can't help but point out the potential flaw in his eagerness to reconnect with Donna. "I don't know if this is a good idea. He could get busted for trespassing, or worse, for being a peeping tom who's ... you know, peeping into people's windows. I mean, I just called them, like less than ten minutes ago, there's a good chance they're still up. If they see him, they could call the cops on him, ... for being a pervy creep." _Shit, she knows she's blabbering!_

"Are you nervous?" Jax's question takes her by surprise, and when she looks over at him to meet his eyes, she realizes that he's smirking at her.

"I guess." She mutters unsure.

Yes, she's most definitely nervous, but for a moment she's contemplating what she's actually more nervous about. Is it the fact that Opie's sneaking around the yard of a stranger's house in the dark? Or that she's sitting here in this truck now, in the middle of the night, all alone next to Jax, her new boyfriend?

And leave it to Jax to read her thoughts, only to then wonder out loud. "Nervous for Ope, or nervous for being stuck here with me?"

She gives him a shy smile, feeling her face heat, and hating that the streetlamp right in front of them is so damn bright that he can surely see the blush creeping across her cheeks.

"Both I guess." She replies, even though she's now pretty sure that it's ninety-nine percent him that has her feeling on edge. And it's not that she's scared he'd hurt her, or do something she doesn't want him to do, because if that was the case she would've never agreed to tag along. No, it's rather the knowledge that she's so crazy about him already, that she can't be sure she can trust herself around him if it comes down to deny him anything, or tell him 'no' in the first place.

Tara could swear that Jax knows exactly what he's doing to her, wielding that _Teller-charm_ around her like some kind of magic wand, and _damn_ if it isn't working, because she's found herself wholeheartedly under his mesmerizing spell. _Aargh!_

"What do you wanna do _now_?' He asks, knowing full well that it's such a loaded question, even more so with the sinful grin on his unshaven face that accompanies his words.

But hey, two can play that game, and so she doesn't miss a beat and throws that very same question right back in his insufferably handsome face. "I don't know. What do _you_ wanna do _now_?"

However, Jax doesn't seem bothered at all by her deflection of his question, the opposite really, looking very comfortable with the fact that she has just thrown the ball back into his court. He leans back and relaxes more in his seat, and then gives her a long, hard look, so intense that it has a shiver of anticipation running down her spine, and has her looking away again, before she does something stupid and out of character again, like throw herself at him.

But just as she ponders over that thought, his hands are on her, framing her face, lifting her chin until she has no choice but to meet his gaze, and to acknowledge the curiosity and lust eclipsing the blues of his eyes. And _damn him_ , for the way he's searching her face like he's trying to memorize it, leaving her feeling breathless and reduced to a pool of need.

The tiny gap between them disappears when he angles her face just so, and then leans in to drop his mouth to hers in a kiss. Her eyes flutter closed at once, because _holy hell,_ what a tantalizing kiss that is. The boy sure knows how to kiss, and before she knows what she's doing, she's got her fingers twisting around the fabric of his t-shirt, trying desperately to hold onto something, because he's making her feel dizzy, but also greedy for more.

"Damn, babe." He pulls away, mumbling against her lips and searching her face anew.

Her eyes open, meeting his, and again she's instantly drawn under his spell, before he winks at her and leans in just to kiss her some more. _How does he do that?_

His hands are on her body now, pulling her even closer, greedy himself for more contact, pulling her into his lap, but that only lasts a few precious minutes, because, in a smooth and obviously well-practiced move, Jax has suddenly maneuvered them both horizontally onto the seat.

Tara's on her back, with him hovering right above her, his arms braced beside her head, his hips pressing against hers, their legs rather awkwardly bent and tangled up with each other in the small space, and yet he never even had to break their kiss to get them here.

She'd be downright impressed, if it didn't instantly make her wonder just how many times he's done this particular move with other girls, to get this good at it and deliver it's execution this smoothly and efficiently. _And yet, I'm still kissing him!_

As if he's sensing her train of thought, he suddenly pulls back, bracing himself above her, smoothing her long hair back and out of her face, and searching her eyes when he says. "You gotta tell me if you wanna stop."

Those are so not the words she'd expected to hear from him at the moment, but they strangely make her feel warm and fuzzy and safe, even as she's practically trapped beneath him, because they prove to her again that Jax really is one of the good ones. Her bad-boy is a good guy, someone who'd never push her to do something she isn't comfortable with.

She's not going to sleep with him. She just can't. No, not here, not now, not like this. As much as she wants him, this just isn't what she wants her first time to be like. Parked along the curb in some random neighborhood in Lodi, with the possibility of anyone just wandering upon them, and not to forget the fact that Opie could return at a moment's notice again too.

"Hey, babe." He croons, gazing down at her. "Don't be nervous, alright? I'm cool with just kissing." He reassures, proving himself yet again to be a mind reader who can read her thoughts like an open book. "'Re you cool with that?"

"Yeah." She nods up at him, glad she's able to find her voice. "I'm cool with that." But then her eyes flicked past him for just a second, out the windshield, squinting at the brightness of the way too bright streetlamp that seems to be shining down at them like a spotlight on a stage.

"What's wrong?" Jax instantly asks, craning his neck to follow her gaze, before his eyes return to hers. "Is the light bothering you?"

"I never noticed how bright they are." She comments and watches as he takes a second look at it over his shoulder.

"I can fix that for you." He announces easily, like he's done this countless times before, and then with the same ease that has landed them here, he pushes himself up to sit, before reaching blindly beneath the bench seat, only to produce a black rifle a moment later.

Tara's eyes go wide with shock, but before she can even get so much as a single word out, he's already easing her obvious worries. "Relax. It's just a bb-gun, shooting pellets. It's not real."

"Oh." It's all she can think of in reply, and just like that he's quickly pumping it a few times, leans out the already open window, takes aim, and then with a popping sound, glass breaking and a few sparks flying, the damn streetlamp that had bothered her just a second ago, has now been made history. All thanks to the unusual resourcefulness of none other than her boyfriend Jackson Teller.

She props herself up on her elbows and gapes at him, while he busies himself with stowing the gun away right back where he'd found it. Words are evading her for a long couple seconds, but when his attention is back on her and he crawls back over her, she finally finds her voice. "I can't believe you just did that? I'm starting to think I'm dating a crazy person?"

He laughs out loud and smirks, thoroughly amused by her reaction. "Not crazy, just trying to please my girl." He explains, his natural charm showing when he's smoothing his palm over the top of her head, brushing her hair back again like she's a small child that needs reassurance. "Don't worry. It's the middle of the night. Everyone's fast asleep. It's all good!"

 _God,_ what she wouldn't give for just an ounce of his confidence. Deep down she knows it's making him reckless, but that thought doesn't make her feel any less envious of him at the moment. _Does he even have a care in the world?_

And just like that, his blue eyes are shining mischievously again, and his grin comes easy too when he asks. "Now where were we?"

She clears her throat, gazing up at him and reaching up to brush his unruly hair back for a change, already feeling much more at ease due to the anonymity the now much darker cabin provides when she whispers. "Kiss me, Jax!"

X

Author's Note: Hi everyone, I hope you're all still healthy. I can't wait to hear what you think of this chapter. Thank you!


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